Alright, I know you're not all completely undesirable to

>>34536545
>looking for j-0-b
>apply to local yogurt shop--seems easy enough
>as soon as I see the manager I am hynotized
>like completely in over my head, love at first sight
>interview w/ other manager--a guy, get the job
>start working their and it is going great
>I have a natural charisma and charm; however, romantically I have a past of fuckin shit up EVERY FUCKIN time, but this time it will be different
>going so dam well, she'd laugh at my jokes, she would touch me when she didnt need to, etc
>also, she is a real classy lady, doesnt do this to just anyone
>a few months go by and she invites me over to her house to hangout
>doesnt necessarily mean Im in, bc reasons that are too long to explain
>we hang out, we smoke a bowl, she makes her roomate--a guy who loves her leave.
>we keep hanging out looking at memes together, when she says I can sleep on the couch or w/ her
>oh shittttttttt! wtf! Is this happening?
>Heart beatiing too fast, genuinely freaking out
>genuinely
>Have to go outside to contain myself and think about this

If you're trying to communicate with failed normies, you must go to another board (e.g., /fit/) You underestimate just how ugly you have to be to qualify as a robot; for robots, even "grotesque" and "hideous" are compliments.

>>34536545
>missed chances, obliviousness, and general fuckups
as far as I know, I've never associated with any female who found me desirable

>>34536545
well there was a girl back in 9th grade that talked to me once, that's about the farthest I ever got

>chase after half-Korean girl who looked completely Korean in high school, she was my first friend ever, randomly found and messaged me on Facebook I guess because she saw me looking at her or something.

>her parents legitimately didn't ever let her outside, for any reason except school

>her blonde cousin like a year or two younger starts going to our high school and sits with us at lunch

>hang out with her cousin since she's able to, I'm 18 and she's 14 at the time

>her mom totally likes me and this girl wants to hang with me all the time. was at her house even when her mom wasn't there, mom trusted me, i could have slept over just me and her there and done anything

>i didn't realize she liked me for a couple years (she wanted me the whole time) and when I did I was still orbiting her half-Korean cousin.

>this blonde girl was thick but not obese or disgustingly fat, super submissive and damaged to the point I could do anyhing

How bad did I fuck up

>>34536739
>like I said she is real classy, so not sure if just wants to sleep or actually make love, like I said I really love this woman
>also, I dont necessarily believe in waiting til marriage, but it's gotta be the real thing
>anyways, I go outside, stare at the moon for awhile
>when I come back she asks if everything is alright
>I say ya, and go to sleep
>end up sitting their next to her for hours going crazy!!
>listening to her breathe, listening to the moment pass me by, maybe, I didnt know
>I thought this was just the beginning
>anyways, finally go to sleep and wake up from a wet dream
>cum-filled underwears
>tried to play it off when I woke up, dont thinkk she saw, but she could have
>another month goes by---things going decent, but not great
>so I have the genius idea of writing her an anonymous poem, girls like that shit--right?!?!
>I end up having a mental breakdown after weeks go by, and literally cry for an hour in front of her
>now she dates the roomate, and it is serious
>I ruined my chance
>it was love and i completely and utterly fucked up lol
>I have to laugh or I start crying
>it has been a year and things have not gotten better
>I am a cyborg. Good at social skills, but a complete failure at sexual relationships
>I missed my opportunity.
>ended up going on a gnarly drug binge, finally getting back to being ok
>I cannot fuck up again or this could be the end
>or maybe just hookers, idk

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>girl I went to high school with starts texting me
>makes small talk at first "What's up?" "How are things going?"
>one day out of the blue messages me "lets fuck"
>confused as fuck but try to act confident, message her "ya sure, come over tonight"
>"wait what's your astrological sign?
>"It's Virgo, why?"
>texts me "sorry I don't think we'd be sexually compatible"
>the fucking stars cockblocked me

This girl is a notorious whore, she apparently has notched the amount of guys she's slept with on her bedpost. I did not know this at the time though.

>>34536754
The ugliness of robots is not physical. That's why it's possible to change for the better with some effort.

>>34536754
im a low-end cyborg. I have social skills, but never had a gf, other than one for a month or something in high school. Nothing happened, but kisses and feeling her tits a couple times

>>34536545
I had some shortstack in the swim team really like me when I was in high school, eventually we sort of dated for a while, but it was all platonic kisses and awkward movie dates and awkward conversations over her playing pokemon or reading a book.
The magic died after like 3 months and then the following 3 or so months were draining, she seemed to be less invested like something was wrong but I couldn't fix it with communication.

After that crumbled apart, some girl in art class was obsessed with me and called me "interesting" "my darling" etc, but the thing is she had no view of my actual character or anything about me to be interested in.
I think I should have given her some chance at least, if just for the fact that I might have gained more magical self confidence or whatever and might not be a virgin now 8 or 9 years later.

>be me 7 years ago, I'm 17
>play WoW all day, wotlk era
>there's a girl in my guild
>proper attentionwhore seems kinda slutty
>flirts with our guild master a lot when she fails on mechanics
>call her out on it one day and tell her to shape up
>she starts whispering me
>suddenly telling me her life story how hard everything is
>ok.jpg
>some months pass and we eventually become friends
>she had a fuckbuddy in England she would sometimes fly over to see
>at this point I'm low key developing a crush on her
>a week before her next trip to get fucked by Chad Bongdicks he cancels on her
>she's upset, has 2 weeks off from work and nothing to do
>I muster up the courage and invite her to fly over to me for a visit
>she accepts

cont.

>>34536754
A robot doesn't have to be ugly to be a friendless, jobless, unhappy, virgin loser at 25.

>>34536545
>obsessed weeb, only look for japanese girls
>start learning the language
>spend hours a day trying to memorize 2000+ kanji
>use language learning app called HelloTalk that lets me talk to Japanese people around the world
>start actually picking up the language
>able to actually have an online conversation with japanese qts
>start adding every single japanese girl i see on the app
>the app only lets you send 20 friend requests per day
>start adding every single japanese girl i see everyday for 3 months
>9 times out of 10 get blocked for being creepy
>eventually have over 300 friends on this app
>find this one gaijin hunter slut who's horny when i add her
>we actually start sexting each other, but just messages
>this is a huge surprise to me because usually at this point i'd get blocked or politely rejected
>add her on popular Japanese messaging app called line
>we regularly sext each other and sometimes have phone masturbation sessions
>she's too shy to show herself on live camera
>she tells me about her american bf of 2 years who stopped contact with her
>try to play the nice guy and tell her to try to repair the relationship
>didn't realize she's been sexting some other chad as well
>this chad is smart so he swoops in for the kill
>she and the chad guy become official couple

It sucks because I ended up adding her on instagram too, but all she posts are things about meeting her new boyfriend. They've been dating almost a year at this point, and he's visited her in japan more than once. I'm still friends with this girl but damn i missed my possibly only chance ever.

>>34536964
>she arrives as planned
>I live with my parents obviously, but downstairs so we have decent privacy
>first night we watch a movie on my couch
>I literally have no expectations of anything because I'm just a beta orbiter
>also a kvh
>out of nowhere she turns around and kisses me
>we start making out
>she's leading fully, knowing I'm a virgin
>takes out my dick and starts sucking on it
>holy fuck what
>this hurts so much
>have to tell her to stop, the bain is unbearable
>she's confused but says it's okay
>we undress completely and go over to my bed
>I try to stick it in
>it still hurts a lot
>try forcing it a bit but my dick eventually gives up and goes flaccid
>she's still confused, feels kind of bad
>gives me a handie and we sleep

>the next 2 weeks move on like this, we make out a lot and she gives me a handjob before bed
>last day, about an hour before she has to leave
>I decide we must try this again, I'm not going to let my virgnity remain after this opportunity
>things go as planned, I alpha it up and make my move
>we're in my bed naked again
>I try to put it in
>still really fucking hurts
>I get anxious and paniced
>determined, I go full force and j-j-jam it in
>I enter, but feel excrutiating pain as if something ripped
>I come immediately and pull out
>there's blood
>it's not hers
>my dick and her pussy is filled with white cum and light red blood
>she needs to get going to the airport
>I get taken to the emergency room for surgery
>they tell me I had a severe case of phimosis and should've gotten this taken care of years ago
>I had no idea, masturbating was just fine
>they cut some of my skin, but not enough
>needed to have surgery one more time afterwards

Not sure if that counts as losing my virginity though.

>>34536858
This feels like NTR
REEEEE

>>34537188
How is this even possible? Also yeah congrats man you're not a virgin.

>>34537296
>How is this even possible?

I thought ant-eater dicks were normal when you're uncut. The only other dicks I ever saw were the dicks in American porn, all of which were cut. I knew they were different from mine, so I thought my weird looking fella was "normal".

>>34536545
i wish a woman would of talked to me

all throughout highschool not one girl had a non school convo with me, hell, they only talked to me if they had to. I looked decently attractive too but then again I was a white supremacist retard who was 5'9 so of course they never liked me

>>34536545
>In high school, IB program so I have classes with the same like 80 people all four years
>10th grade, have a history class with a girl I don't know since I've only had her in this one class so far
>Pretty sure I never spoke to her, but one day she just comes over and sits on my desk and acts flirty trying to befriend me
>She's a size 0 with a really huge ass that's well-shaped, girl is stacked basically
>Pale skin, really, really pretty
>Turns out she's single and interested in me and one other guy from a different school
>Very touchy, grinds on me hard at a party, only contact with a girl I'd had up to that point
>Don't get the hint so she ends up dating the other guy and I end up as just her friend

>Still high school, get close with this tall Jewish chick
>At her house watching a movie, lying on the couch with our heads near each other
>We both look at each other, faces are super close and there's a lot of tension for a kiss
>Her brother was on the other couch so I pussed out
>End up going to a sorta group movie, turns out only me, her, and one other guy show up
>Guy is cool, known him for a while and I pick up that he really likes her during the movie
>After the movies over I talk to him in the parking lot, basically tell him that I'm gonna back off of her since he seems to be really into her while I was just kinda into her
>They dated for like two years before breaking up, she's a lawyer now

>High school party, this really ditzy, half-black girl comes over to the couch I'm sitting on
>She's ridiculously hot, ended up doing nude modeling after high school and I'm pretty sure she stripped at a really high-end, expensive club
>She just sits in my lap and starts giving me a lap dance
>There's guys sitting on both sides of me and for some reason I just sorta shoo her away like "bitch get off of me"
>Why the fuck did I do that

>>34537656
>would of

yea no thanks

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>>34537688
say that to my face and ima get you

>>34536545
preschool
>girl tells me to "look!" and pulls down her pants, showing me her vagoo
>tell on her

kindergarden
>me and girl play a game everyday where we hang from monkey bars and I wrap my legs around her abdomen and try to pull her around which was to this day the closest thing i've had to sex
>she stops talking to me and moves out of nowhere and I'm left alone and feeling betrayed

4th grade
>girl I have massive crush on likes me too and even asks me if I want a kiss because i'm looking so sad or something
>say no

6th grade
>cute girl keeps telling me how sexy my braces were and always sort of dryhumped me when we played basketball (im not black)

7th grade
>another girl who I played basketball with constantly plowed her ass into my crotch when I was on defense against her and flirted with me (her chad bf actually hated me probably cause he knew he was being cucked lol)

8th grade
>2 very hot girls in computer class get very flirty and touchy with me and a friend up for awhile, likely trying to get us into some sort of 4 way or something but we were actual autists so did nothing
>or maybe they were fucking with us. It felt real though

>>34537787

freshman hs
>got paranoid because of two bad girl sluts that wanted to hurt me because I called their friend fat

sophomore
>someone tells me 6th grade girl who liked my braces really likes me and that I should ask her out
>porno giantess looking girl with huge tits (not fat) walks up to me after not having seen her for a year and tells me she really likes me
>literally just say "cool"
>extremely shy doe-eyed girl stares at me from across the classroom for half a year and I stare back but nothing else even though I had a massive crush on her

junior year
>braces girl TAs for computer programming class I take and always stares at me, even does her hair which I have never seen her do before on the day of my birthday
>towards the end of the year she walks up to me and talks to me and in 20 seconds realizes I am a total sperge and never bothers with me again

senior year
>shy girl is back, and still into me but I have such severe anxiety and self-esteem issues at this point that I can't even think about girls
>utter fucking nympho looking ginger girl (a legit 10/10 in my eyes) shares a bus stop with me and lives a 3 minute walk from my house makes it very clear that she wants me
>do nothing. One of my biggest regrets to this day
>friend's 9/10 stacie sister tells me that I am so cute and cries in her room when I tell her that yes indeed, her belly button does look a little weird

college
>friend's sister calls me cute again at his wedding, I end up leaving and she posts something on facebook about the one who got away

I'm only semi-autistic

>>34537801
>>friend's 9/10 stacie sister tells me that I am so cute and cries in her room when I tell her that yes indeed, her belly button does look a little weird


Lost it on this one. Yeah, you're definitely more than semi-autistic.

Good post, anon.

>>34537673
Continued
>Get first girlfriend when I'm 22, she basically straight up told me she wanted to date me
>Solid 9/10, everybody basically says "damn, good for you man" when they find out she's with me
>We're both virgins, date for 2 years
>Eventually try to have sex, she's the one that asks for it
>Can't get it in without her in tears
>Turns out she has vaginismus
>No biggie, I can wait
>Eventually she falls out of love with me, doesn't every try to correct her condition, ends up cheating on me
>Break up, both of us still virgins
>At least I got to basically do every other thing you can imagine to her

>After breakup, try to hookup with my roommate, she's a friend of my ex, not my best decision
>Pretty cute, virgin, 8/10, gets asked out a lot but turns guys down
>Actually thinks about it seriously, there's some light touching between us one night
>She ends up deciding against it because she feels wrong about hooking up with her friend's ex
>Tells me if I wasn't her friend's ex she would've done it
>My ex naturally rages at me when she finds out I tried to hookup with her

Right now there's a Chinese girl that wants to be with me, but I'm not sure about the cultural and dating differences. Plus, I'm pretty disillusioned and depressed after my ex. Would be funny if I still died a virgin after getting so close to losing it.

>>34536545
>girls that genuinely liked you

nice meme, its never happened.

>be me
>sisters friend is over
>hear her saying dumb meme shit like but who was phone to sister
>sister goes to sleep
>start talking to friend and internet comes up
>ashamed of being anon so I tell her I go on reddit
>she tells me I'm a loser and that 4chan is better
>she goes back upstairs to sisters room and never comes back over

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>sometime last year
>this girl and I start spending a ton of time alone
>she is super qt
>really shy
>kind of awkward but in a cute way
>we're basically dating/ doing couple type bullshit for a few months
>one night she calls me up and asks if I want to go to the lake
>Literally had the worst week of my fucking life during this time
>tell her sure
>she offers to pick me up
>drives us down to the lake
>we're talking about life and bullshit while hotboxing her car listening to music
>after a few hours shes getting tired and wants to go home
>on the drive home she turns down the music and says
>"A-anon, I want to tell you something"
>I pretty much know whats coming, and for some reason I get really uncomfortable even though Im in love with this chick
>She continues
>"You're like one of the coolest guys i've ever met, and I think I really want to take this a step further"
>I sperg out so fucking hard, mainly due to being blasted out of my skull stoned, and having general anxiety
>I just say "Y-yeah m-me too, haha."
>We go silent for pretty much the rest of the car ride which is like half an hour
>She gets to my place
>I get out and say "I'll see ya around"
>She drives off
>She moves to a town 200 miles away a week and a half later

I think about this shit every single day. It really fucked me up for a while, and I was extremely angry at myself for so long.

Still cant bring myself to call her or talk to her again, its been more than a year since I last talked to her.

>>34537888
trips, anon. You have to talk to her. Don't disappoint Kek.

>>34537258
cyborg life is just as lonely. forever trapped between two ferns

>>34537787
>2 very hot girls in computer class

>hot girls

>computer class

pick one

>>34536545

>meet qt blonde girl in high school
>first girl to accept my weird as fuck demeanor and genuinely act friendly to me
>invites me to hang with her all the time
>never directly makes physical contact with me, but invites to do things like place my head on her lap, or lean on her shoulder, you know "I-if you want to"
>this goes on for years, well past high school and into college
>she eventually starts dating, meets other guys
>still talks to me a lot, always seems overly-interested in my own love life and doesn't like talking about her boyfriends
>whenever she breaks up with a boyfriend, she practically announces it to me
>always follows it up with asking me how my own love life is going
>tell her about girls I've dated, my own romantic failures
>she always tells me she hates those girls and that I deserve better, always takes my side no matter what
>it is now the present time
>both in our 20s now, her birthday is coming up soon
>she invites me to come over to celebrate her birthday with her at her house
>tell her I may or may not be able to come, depending on if my boss will let me take the day off
>she wants me to tell her the second I find out, really really wants me to come to her b-day party
>a month goes by, eventually find out my boss was letting me get the day off, let her know over text
>haven't messaged her in that whole month, but she immediately responds back with over the top joy, practically blowing up my phone with walls of text and emoticons
>can't stop talking about how excited she is to see me
>keeps dropping hints about how she's single, but does it in a roundabout way by mentioning she recently got out of a LDR and was feeling lonely
>respond back with "man that's rough, well, anyways, I'll see you at the party!"

Maybe it's my own imagination, but I swear to god this girl has been orbiting me for 7+ years now.

Why the fuck aren't any other girls like this? The worst part? I don't have any feelings towards her

>>34537970
I dont even know what i'd say, I felt like such an asshole. She probably doesn't want anything to do with me anymore.

I could've raped this drunk girl in my dorm and I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have noticed/woken up because she was passed out.

This is my only missed chance.

>>34537837
no one dies a virgin anon, life fucks us all.

>>34538124
is that kurt cobain? because kek

>>34537042
So I downloaded the Hellotalk app hoping to meet the cute japanese girls but.... how do you actually start the conversation.

Getting anxiety attacks just looking at the list of cute girls I can potentially talk to.

Im pretty cyborg with some friends of both genders and can fake my way through conversations but a female has literally never taken an interest in me. I dont really care at this point anyway. Ive got other shit to do

>enrolling in tafe a couple weeks ago
>meet up with a girl who was in the same course as me a while ago
>turns out we're in the same class
>we end up talking pretty much the whole day
>weirdly nice to me the whole time even though we barely talked before this
>even waits for me outside the office while I was handing in my enrollment paperwork even though I was taking forever.

She was probably just spending time with me because I was the only one there she new but it still felt nice to have someone to talk to. It's only a matter of time before I reveal my autism to her though as I can only fake being normal for so long.

>>34537787

>girl tells me to "look!" and pulls down her pants, showing me her vagoo

Oh god I had a similar experience, except the girl was my little sister's friend and I was 18.

She had a crush on me and would follow me around everywhere, and then one day after I got back from taking my sister and her friends to the beach, she pulls off her swimsuit and spreads her legs open, spreads her buttchecks and says "ANON LOOK"

It was fucking traumatizing.

I don't hang around my sister's friends anymore.

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>>34536858
>"she's so classy lmao hurrrrr"
>smokes weed

Yeah gtfo she's just another used up twat buddy

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>>34536872
>tfw Virgo
>tfw repelled by both my parents

...it all makes sense now

>friend tells me that i gotta go on tinder cause all i want is a gf
>tinder is not the place to get a gf i tell him
>go on it anyways cause i'm a sucker
>use my normiebook so i dont have my face as my pfp but it works out and i find a girl who recognized my pfp as kaz from mgsv
>she's into melee like me
ill be humble and say she was an 8.5 but in my mind she's a 9
>has met all of the best melee players in the world and speaks to hbox on a regular basis
>backs it up with pics
>talk for about 3 days, though mid conversation she'd leave me on read (inb4 shes talkin 2 other doods bro)
>sends me nudes
>khv and i've never experienced something like this
>i panic
>"lmao ok"
>explain myself
>left on read again
>a day passes and we're messaging each other like normal again, play some vidya
>tells me im cute, she wants to kiss me blah blah blah and that she wants to hang out
>"yeah that'd be great! when can you hang out?"
>read
>"oh sorry i've just been kinda depressed lately i still wanna hang out though"
>finally set up day
>bails
>"sorry my dad can't drive me today im really sorry how can i make it up to you"
>"oh well can we play a couple games of overwatch?"
>we never played those games
>sends me video of her ass
>"OOPS DIDNT MEAN TO SEND THAT TO YOU I MEANT TO SEND THAT TO MY FRIEND"

that's pretty much it. it was a slow and painful decline to not talking to her but she was probably a whore, sent me nudes within 3 days. dumb roastie probably fucked hungrybox too. she's got a bf now so idek what she wanted with me. women are fucking mentally ill, i swear.

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>>34538085
>qt blonde
>I don't have any feelings toward her
.....leave this place.... immediately

>>34539087
ill do another cause nobody else is posting
>friend invites me over
>introduces me to gril
>7/10
>can tell this girl is into me within an hour, she's throwing stuff at me, touching me, making fun of me
>adds me on normiebook and we chat
>asks me if i'm a virgin
>yeah why (i knew why)
>"ehehe would u like to change that"
>like eventually bitch sure slow your roll
>we keep talking she's coming over and eventually we're making out and shit, but i never fucked her
>basically do everything a couple would do except not say it
>confront her about this
>"i'm just not ready yet..."
>like two months go by and this shit continues
>get tired of this bullshit and just stop talking to her, delete her off of normiebook
>she comes back with a sob story about how she met a guy on tinder and he like raped her or some shit
>total bullshit, i still had her on snapchat and the day she said it happened she was not where she said she was nor was she with anybody but her friend, and she was posting all day
>before i realize this i try and sympathize with her
>tell her that i was molested when i was a kid
>"oh that all makes so much sense now"
>"wtf are you talking about
>"that explains why you didn't wanna fuck me"
>i just dont believe in fucking girls the day i meet them, but her, with her tiny primate brain can only fixate on that.
>now she wants to be my gf cause she "wants to help me"
>"yeah whatever"
>basically tell her to get fucked
>takes it literally
2 months later she has a bf and has added me for the 3rd time after i deleted her talking to me and i just sorta let the convos die

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>>34536545

My oneitis stories
6th grade
>see cute blonde at lunch time by my group of friends
>you can tell she's secretly very conscious about her body (only a little bit of fat, used to be more fat until other girls made fun of her)
>am also a little fat, but tallest kid in my class so it evens me out
>she is super happy and talkative around us
>amazing southern accent super fucking cute (im from Ohio btw)
>comes over to us every day during lunch time to talk
>we are all secretly in love and are her orbiters
>rest of friends compete for her
>compliments, pickup lines and shit
>I just sit there on my bench admiring her beauty quietly
>she probably interprets this as me not being interested/playing hard to get meme
>starts talking to me and only me at lunch
>sits on my lap all the time and all my friends get jealous
>I interpret this as pity or her just teasing me and never make any moves

7th grade
Facebook is now a thing and we post on each other's walls all the time and text

8th grade
>She has started to become increasingly hotter
>no lie probably had like D's by this time and is becoming one of the hottest girls at my school
>school dance
>too autistic to ask her to dance with me
>she comes over and takes me downstairs under the gym to "talk"
>we just hangout with a couple of her friends for a while
>go back up and we go outside
>ask her why we're waiting outside in the cold
>she says she's waiting for her boyfriend to pick her up and that she's sorry we didn't get to dance
>mfw

Cont. this is the happy part of the story

>be me
>meet cute maldivean chick at green club
> hit it off with her immediately
> sparks flying, hearts racing
> friend automatically offers to help
> friend starts cockblocking like a pro v2
> friend starts accusing me of all kinds of shit like stalking her and obsessing over her
> conclusion: friend has become closer to her than me. girl gets blocked on whatsapp. she blocks me too
> can't show my face in the green club again

so anons what do i do?

>>34536850
>tfw I have literally done the same thing down to the blond girl being submissive and damaged just replace "half-korean cousin" with "white friend"
truly the worst of feels

>>34537837
wtf how are you finding so many virgin Women in their 20's?

>>34539149
Didn't you read the part when Anon mentioned she dated other guys for over 7 years? You wouldn't accept other men's used goods, would you?

>>34537188
alright, after reading that every other story is just a bonus.

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>girl likes me
>she is a massive slut who talks constantly about female empowerment
>avoid her until she gives up
Nothing of value was lost

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>>34539400
9th grade
>she's full blown drop dead gorgeous by now and only associates with me because of our past
>am still her closest, most trusted beta orbiter
>we have the same lunch time again and she still hangs around my group of friends occasionally
>when she does my lap is still her preferred seat
>am 14 and get boners a lot (obviously)
>one day it is cold and she is really rubbing her ass on my dick
>is wearing yoga pants
>get boner
>my dick goes inside of her
>she immediately yelps
>"meat up the butt"
>turns around and looks at me
>everyone looks at me
>everyone starts laughing
>my face is burnt red
>bury my face into her back and never emerge
>she eventually gets up and goes to talk to chad or some shit
>friends all tell me I lost my virginity
>....feelsgoodman

10th grade
>I get a new friend who becomes my best friend (just switched to my school but I knew him beforehand)
>He is twice as handsome as me and all the girls want him
>pretty much the chad of our friend group and the only reason we aren't complete rejects
>he is turbo autist and denies all the girls (ones I would have killed for)
>oneitis likes him and I can tell
>says he's "cute" and shit
>starts sitting on his lap instead
>REEEEEEE
>kill him in minecraft and piss him off
>we don't talk for like 3 months despite sitting right next to each other all the time
Cont.

There was this one time I told a girl to get the fuck off my board because she was posting in a thread about doing well with the opposite sex. Then again I also told this to a bunch of dudes. Does this mean I'm gay?

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>>34540329
Still 10th grade
>oneitis and her friend sit beside me in math
>everyone in class is retarded so we make fun of everyone together
>friend is fat but one of those fat girls you know would be pretty hot if they weren't fat
>fat girl likes me
>she is fun to talk to and we become semi friends but I am still deeply in love with oneitis
>oneitis finds out and doesn't want her beta orbiter taken away
>tries to get her not to like me anymore
>her and fatty are hanging out one day so she leaves her at a Walmart parking lot and goes to hang out with (and get fucked by) her bf Chad
>they hate each other from then on and I have to split up my time between the two
>being relaxed and chill around fatty, and beta orbiter around oneitis
>she even lets me awkwardly touch and play with her hair sometimes. Just enough to keep me hung up on her

11th grade
Kinda lose touch, no classes together, become interested in other girls who reject me. Still talk to fatty but she has moved on to my chad friend and is now his orbiter

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>>34540351
It's all downhill after this one boys

12th grade
>me and oneitis have English class together
She sits beside me to "catch up" and shit
>by this time I was kinda over her, started orbiting this extremely small blonde girl from Florida who had a bf. >had convinced myself oneitis wasn't that hot anymore
>she still was Jesus Christ
>we get to talking but I play it cool and kind of just ignore her
>holyfuckshewantsmemorethanever.png
>starts asking "what I'm doing this weekend" and shit
>still playing it cool
>she gets moved in front of me because we were talking too much (like 2 feet in front of me as if that's going to solve anything)
>starts trying to get my attention (leaning on me when we're together, putting her hair on my desk for me to play with)
>fall for her dirty woman tricks
>I fall even more in love with her than I ever was and this time it was bad.
>one day start playing with her hair while class is taking turns reading MacBeth
>She says "it's so relaxing"
>"I love it when you twist my hair anon"
>she puts her bead back and looks as if she's about to fall asleep
>she starts moaning quietly
>I start pulling her hair while my benis grows
>I'm getting into it and am pulling her hair very hard at this point
>she's now fucking moaning at full volume
>I finally remember we are at school and look to my right (we sat against the wall on the left side of the room)
>whole class Is staring right at me
>she's still in complete bliss and is about to fucking orgasm or some shit
>teacher is looking dead at me with a glare of 1000 daggers
>I put my hands on my desk and put my head down in embarrassment for the rest of the class
>oneitis gets mad because I i stopped
>teacher pulls me aside after class and says "why don't we leave that for after class huh bud?"

Cont.... again

>>34537360
Hahahaha, hello Fredrik

>>34540377
Strap in

12th grade same class
>free time and me and oneitis are talking
>"teehee are you still a virgin anon?" oneitis says with her southern angel voice
>"y-yes (she knew too much about me for me to even think about lying)
>"Hmm well I am dating chad right now" (her Army BF who cheated on her eventually)
>"But if we ever break up and your still a virgin just call me" she said as she looked dead into my soul with the most serious look on her face
>"o-ok haha.."
>"I always thought you were so cute but you never asked me out"
>full sperg mode has engaged and I do not remember what happened after this but it's proabably so bad I've repressed it
completely

Few weeks after sperg out
>walking to my car to go home
>oneitis sees me from her car (daddy's massive truck)
>waves at me and calls me over
>alreadysweating.jpg
>"hey anon you've never been to prom have you?"
>"uh no, I never asked anyone"
>"I was wondering if you wanted to go with me this year"
>I am extremely excited and react normally and don't sperg out
>"yeah I'd love to can't wait!"
>prom is getting close (3-4 weeks away)
>still haven't heard from oneitis (we aren't in any classes together anymore)
>text her "hey are we still going to prom together?"
>Completely ghosted
>prom happens
>I GOT DITCHED FOR A FUCKING DYKE GIRL
>mfw they made out all night apparently
>mfw that was supposed to be me
>last day of school we end up sitting beside each other somehow for one of those senior assembly's
>complete fucking silence

I've gotten this far might as well finish it in case anyone is actually reading all this
Shit

>>34536886
fuck off failed normie reeeeee

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>>34540406

College (2 months ago)
>get tinder because I am slowly becoming a wizard apprentice and am completely desperate
>swiping
>get matches (non fake accounts)
>realize I'm too afraid to fucking talk to any of these girls
>one day get notification in bed
>"Someone has super liked you"
>unlock phone
> ITS ONEITIS WTF
>"My prayers have been answered!" I type full of joy and boosted self esteem
>"lol I love you anon <3"
>it'sfinallyhappening.jpeg
>look at her Normiebook
>she's fucking engaged...
>anxiety takes over
>never message back

fuck you Amber, I'm still a fucking virgin

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>Middle school
>There is a qt3.14 in my class
>First time in love
>She loved me even though I was retarded and autistic as fuck, even laughed at my le so randumb jokes
>Was too autistic back then to realise she loved me
>She was literally the only person besides my family to remember my birthday and I never even told her when I have my birthday, still don't know how she got it
>Forgot her birthday beacuse I was retarded
>Still the only girl that loved me
>Still the only girl I ever loved
>Had a chance for happy life but I wasted it
And the best part is that I don't even care anymore, I regret nothing in my life simply beacuse if I would care about my every fuck up I would propably kill myself before this day is over.
Still love her though, I wish I could meet her again but whatever, I already accepted the fact I will die alone.

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>>34536545
>go to family party
>forced to dance with my female cousins
>one of them, a distant relative, is interested in me
>it becomes the talk of the party, random family members are giving me advice or telling me to go and talk to her
>feel uncomfortable as fuck and don't talk to her for the rest of the evening

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9-10th grade, true Ausfag school

>Tomboy who I did woodwork with introduces me to her friends
>One was a QT Sri Lankan shortstack
>targetacquired.gif
>A few days later. We happened to have a performance after school,
>Student spread out across the school in small packs
>I notice her alone in a room
>Walk in, say hi etc,
>We have a lot of time and talk for hours before I have to leave
>We hit it off and it becomes obvious shes into me
>Friend of hers confirms the next day
>I don't sperg at all, I keep cool as fuck
>We chat over text, I mostly control my Autismo and play it cool
>But I inevitably sperg out every now and then, she doesn't seem to mind
>She starts getting impatient after literally months of this
>She sends me texts about how she likes me
>I freak a little, even though I was expecting this
>I literally send her a message that says something like "you're too good for me... You're very attractive, but i'm not good enough"
>Why the fuck did I do that?
>She is still pursuing me though
>Valentines day
>Walk up to her in the library, our usual spot
>Sit down opposite, matchmaker tomboy friend sitting on the adjacent side of the table
>I say (I remember this moment clear as fucking day even years later) "You know, oneitis. Since it's valentines day... I was wondering... (she looks so excited and happy, matchmaker gasps), what is the point of this fucking day? The light from her eyes drained and I watched her face turn from expectant joy to utter sadness and disappointment"
>(Someone told me she cryed, I felt nothing)

I'm sorry Mel

>>34540415
>engaged
>on tinder
>letting another guy treat her the way you do while she has a bf

Dude, oneitis aside, you've dodged a huge fucking bullet. This girl is clearly a massive slut, and will do just about anything for male attention.

It sounds like a painful experience going through, but trust me bro - you lucked out hard. Had it gone any other way you would've suffered ten times more.

>>34536772
are you me
(this part is original(not))

>8th grade science class
>girl starts telling me about how she doesn't have a gag reflex
>"Oh wow, that's so cool."
>do nothing else with that information at all

Was she saying that she wanted to suck my dick?

>>34540700
I don't have a gag reflex either, w-what does it mean?

>>34540665
Yeah you're right she probably would have cucked me but it's still rough considering the extremely low place I was at when she liked me on tinder

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>>34540721
Means you are good at succ

>>34536754
What's the difference retard?

Look I admit I'm not as bad as most robots. I've seen girls mirin. I don't sperg out when talking to women(as long as its non-romantic). But when I do sperg out I play it as a joke and some girls just play along. I have "friends", normies.

But you know what? I'm still fucked in the inside. I've flunked out of most schools even though I score high on tests. School bored me. Got a high paying job at a tech firm and just didn't bother coming in.

I have zero emotional connection to my "friends". I don't misr them, care about them, nor do I particularly like them. I only act "nice" out of politeness. When I'm particularly not paying attention I act out and my robotism surfaces and my friends joke about it behind my back.

There are days when I just sit in my room talking to myself morning till noon talking to myself.

I live with my mom and I haven't spoken to her in a week. I have incestous feelings for my big sister. Everytime she comes home I can't decide whether I want to pin her down and kiss her or punch her because she's annoying me.

I hate most videogames because I only care about being good and most shit are casual coddling with little to no skill.

I am bored by anime, tv because most shit falls into predictable shitty patterns.

But mostly I just prefer to be alone.

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Honestly can't think of a time a girl liked me, bet it feels nice

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>>34541090
Oh it is anon... and then reality hits and you realize you would be way better off emotionally if it hadn't happened at all

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>2015
>be me, 18-y/o 5'8" skinny virgin manlet with a history of mental issues
>enrol in a community college course because too dumb for real university
>several girls in the class, but one of them is a beautiful super-popular girl with hundreds of facebook friends
>one day I'm doodling shit in my notebook and popular girl comes over and tells me my drawings are really good
>end up getting a hopeless crush on her because she's insanely hot and also nice to me
>make sure not to show her how I feel because popular girls don't like nerds
>around halfway through the year I try tallking to a lazy unattractive slob girl because I felt she was in my league
>ask out slob girl and get rejected
>popular girl starts being even nicer to me and we start throwing each-other compliments and having meaningful conversations
>one time she randomly tells me my jawline in "on point"
>have literally no idea why she complimented me on such a specific feature and assumed it meant nothing because popular girls don't like nerds
>college course ends
>2 months later, find out through her facebook that she has a new boyfriend who looks eerily similar to me
>all of a sudden realize she was into me the whole time
>still have my v-card to this very day

>>34537801
Post your Chad face, it's the only way someone this autistic manages to pull girls

Talking to teenage hometown oneitis

>"yeah it would be great to visit *home town* again"
>"that sounds really good, it would be nice to see you... you could stay over at my place"
>"I ehh uhh yeah"
>"I'll see if I can arrange the time and uhm yeah I left the ceiling fan in the fridge"

So this happened at least 3 times and every time I visited, I ended up bunking at a male friend's house instead

She even was waiting for me at the bus stop and almost jumped into my arms and seemed really excited and was asking how I'm doing etc.

What did I respond?
>"yeah talk to you later I'm going over to Chad's place I'm staying over there"
>"oh..."

I usually visited at the time of festivities and she approached me during those too but I could never keep a conversation going and she had to awkwardly retreat back to her group of girls until she left and said goodbye exclusively to me even with all the other guys standing right next to me.

She probably thought I was fucking gay or something

Basically I'm too autistic to even accept an invitation to sleep with someone so how am I supposed to approach women?

>>34537787
This triggered my memory

>3rd grade
>Valentine's day
>group of girls announce that they WILL kiss the boys
>they give chase to me and my friend
>we manage to protect our kiss virginity by climbing a tree
>they prey on us under the tree for a while until they get bored

They weren't like weird girls or anything, they were Stacies

I wish I still had that kind of gravitation but my face got fugged by acne and I remained a skinny manlet after puberty so I guess it's Game Over man

>>34539315
JUST FUCK HER ANON!!!
ORIGAMOOOO

>>34541807
Just message her and tell her you always wanted to be with her

What have you got to lose desu she already thinks ur a fag

>>34536754
/thread

now its time for you to leave, OP

>>34541922
It's been years since that story happened

Besides as a teenager she was always a bit emo and "not like the other girls", scene hair, and posting MCR lyrics about loneliness or something but other than that she was a cute, shy blonde girl next door.

Now she's a full-blown "bad girl" complete with tattoos and piercings and chronic alcohol consumption.

>>34536545
> Starts talking on fb
> Not really interested
> Find photos of here on a stretcher after a injury
> Looks hilarious
> Makes memes out of it and spam her
> Asks me to stop
> Deletes convo
> stopped talking

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>There are people on this board that has "missed chances" and they call themselves a robot
>There are people on this board that has received a message from a woman and they call themselves a robot
>There are people on this board who have tinder and facebook accounts

I really hate how people start saying "oh well the ugliness isn't physical" go fuck yourself.

I've literally been laughed and stared at for the way I look in public.

>>34541040
>Waah waah "I'm still fucked on the inside"
You sound like a goddamn 15 year old.

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I still don't know whether I was being led on here but here it goes

>Start first job
>QT Polish girls everywhere
>Two lasses talk to me frequently, we laugh and joke, my anxiety is actually suppressed surprisingly well
>One of them tells me the other really likes me, thinks im cute cause im so young (She's 26 and Im 19)
>Everybody in my department finds out, hounds me to ask her out. Autism kicks in, refuse to do anything
>Bout a month later the two girls ask if I want to go out round town with them.
>"N-no thanks, working overtime that day"
>All my department now think Im gay,

Its been about a month since this occurred, they still speak to me a lot but the lass who apparently liked me now has a boyfriend. I missed out lads.

I feel very bad

>2015 senior year
>have lots of fun playing competitive counter strike with Steam friends
>I'm into the pro scene and all that shit. Bet on all the matches
>me and steam friend A have been friends for a couple years and is probably my best friend, we talk every day for at least 6 hours
>A's gf isn't really into vidya but plays on his acc a couple of times and she becomes my aqauntince
>pretty cute 7.5/10 and very nice
>we start snapchatting and actually think she's pretty cool despite not liking her initially
>convos too long for snapchat so I get her number and we start texting
>A knows we are friends now but doesn't really think anything of it for some reason
>start joking about how I want to make her my housewife and how she'll make me dinner and raise our two loving children
>she plays along
>get a little too deep into the RP and we both realize each other aren't joking
>confess my love for her and she says she has feelings for me too
>we stay friends for a year or so and talk every day
>changes her mind about wanting to be with me several times
>2016 MLG Columbus (big CS tourney)
>me and A with his gf buy tickets and we all meet for the first time was pretty fun but a little awkward
>after they go home she asks me what I thought of her and if I still liked her
>told her I liked her even more and fell in love with her
>she said she felt the same way
>Start talking about her leaving A and moving in with me
>I feel very bad now
>she eventually decides against it (for now) and said she would rather do it later
>I was pissed but we just remained friends
>A finds out what happened because my irl friend tells him
>He dumps her but at this point I didn't know if she still liked me so I was just her friend and didn't try to talk her into dating me
>says she wants to get back with A and I live too far away
>they get back together and I lose my best friend and never talk to her again

>me and A are now friends again somehow

>>34536545
No gril has ever genuinely liked me, they all either only wanted to use me for their own end or did not want anything to do with me at all, so I guess that's enough of a story.

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>>34536545

>tfw no imouto i can train to suck my pee pee with hungry eyes for basic life essentials.

>>34542485
You forgot the golden rule boi, bros before hoes.

I always had this dilemma that I want to talk to girls but If I do they will figure out that I'm autistic. I don't know how to talk to girls, so unless she makes the first move I'm not doing anything.

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>>34536545

Senior year of college
>be 22
>in a fraternity
>awkward af
>pretty close with one sorority
>6 girls in one house
>they call the house "party mansion"
>known this one girl since freshman year
>basically look at her like my sister
>she helped me through a breakup freshman year
>she's 5'7" brunette
>dark eyes great smile
>literally looks like Aidra Fox w/out the pornstar aesthetic
>ask her to be my date to my frat's semi-formal
>"Sure anon!"
>Imyellingtimber.png
>fast forward to semi formal
>pregame
>get wasted
>dancing
>pulls me in close
>"let's get out of here anon"
>oh fuck yes
>get a cab back to party mansion
>get out of cab
>open door for her
>she slips on some ice
>hits her head on a parked car's fender
>roastiedown.jpeg
>pick her up and get her to her feet
>woman steps out from car and says she needs to go to the hospital
>"I'm fine bitch!" she shouts back
>go up to her room
>she smiles
>starts to undress
>falls face first into the bed
>begins to vomit unconsciously
>care for her all night
>make sure she doesn't choke on vom
>next morning comes
>"let's go see if my roomie's up!"
>she and I jump on her roomie's bed
>wake her up
>"hey guys"
>we cuddle the three of us
>realize what's going on
>sit up in bed
>missed my opportunity
>walk to the bathroom
>pretend to take a shit but really just cry like a poosie

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Not me but this happened to my (only) friend
>goes away to visit some friends who are at uni
>in a bar
>scene girl comes and starts chatting him up, within a few minutes they are making out (his first time)
>nothing further happened that time
>next time he makes plans to visit her specifically
>pretty much same thing happens, this time they decide to go back to a hotel
>they are naked on the bed, sex definitely going to happen
>he spills his spaghetti and asks "am i allowed to do this", asking for permission to kiss/touch her
>she is laughing so much that the mood passes and they go to sleep
>next time they meet she makes out with Chad and some ugly dyke in front of him
>he is a cuck and still buys her drinks and compliments her, they even sleep in the same bed together although sex is off
>he is still a virgin to this day
got what he deserved for trying to associate with 3D tbqh

>>34537886
what age?who calls someone a loser after the age of 9?

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i actually had a girlfriend
I ended it
>her teeth were awful
>she never brushed her teeth
>breathe was awful
>didnt want to kiss her (so i didnt)
>she demanded constant attention
>i just wanted to play vidya


I broke up with her over text, and her fat weeb friend assaulted me in anger the next day.

>>34537886
This made me kek, did you try to talk to her afterwards or no?

>>34537360
Were you completely unable to pull back your foreskin?