Anyone else /disconnected/ here? I don't have anxiety.

>>34531606
Try taking "risks". Not stupid ones, but giving sensible informations about yourself to people you think are worthy enough.

That's how one builds a strong bond. And if you pick right, you just end up with a lot of positivity.

Like me, I did have some sperg moments and now I can look at hot and tight bitches into the eye and not break my voice.

Only people that I've been with online for 3+ years I sorta feel connected but I can live completely without them. Just want to be independent early maybe travel but ultimately melt my head

>>34531687
I can't really do that gradually though mate. It's either surface level bullshit or my deepest problems, I've got nothing in between

Tbh I've started making shit up and had some minor success

>>34531760
Yet you can just drop some infos on some people, but not the rest. Besides, don't feel obligated to feel close to colleagues or acquitainces.

I get that feel anon.

>>34531839
Idk it feels like a huge amount of work for what could potentially be terrible, but sometimes I feel like I'm missing out. >>34531932 probably knows what I mean.

>>34532017
Lack of feelings? Lack of empathy? Lack of meaningul people around you?

I'm stuck in a state between sleep and awake, all the time. And has been for the past three years or so.

Yes it could be terrible. That's why I said "risk". But desu, the terrible things that would happen aren't that terrible. Some people know something about you, and that's it.

>>34532082
Fuck, you got it exactly. I could take a shot at it again. Last time I did it with a gf, got way too uncomfortable and hurt her badly telling her I didn't love her in an attempt to prove some shit to myself.

>>34532234
Don't say you don't love her, just say you have blunt/dulled feelings. That is, if you feel less. Like me.

It's just a matter of being honest while not dropping spaghettis and hurting everyone.

>tfw giving "advices" while they don't really work with me

>>34532301
I told her that at the beginning and she still chose to continue with me. She was as close to my version of an ideal partner as I've ever seen. I fucked it up and spent a couple months depressed wondering what was wrong with me. The only time I've cried in the past 3 years.

Thanks for the advice anyway though. Idk how the fuck I understand exactly what you're implying but you seem very similar.

there is an answer, and it's to just b yourself

>>34532400
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schizoid_personality_disorder

My psychiatrist dropped that name the first time I saw him. I'm not diagnosed, but fucking hell, it helps deeply. Perhaps it'll do the same to you.

I think I know that feeling. I live in Toronto where all I hear in public are foreign languages around me, it's like I'm not part of any community. Both of my roommates are immigrants from the third world. Even my coworkers are mostly Chinese or Iranian, and no one is within 10 years of my age. I have nothing in common with anyone in my daily life.

It really wears down on you, and eventually you just stop feeling connected to anything. I go to work, the gym, the grocery store, can provide for myself. But I don't have a true relationship with anybody.

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Yeah, used to, wish I still was on that tone, but a few meltdowns and mental degenerations from stress later I feel like I don't exist

>>34531606
Romanticism was shit.

I am pretty disconnected but that's because I have extreme anxiety so I don't talk to anyone but my parents

>>34532482
"Secret" schizoid sounds very close, the fantasizing is also on point. It's nothing too hindering though, I can get by.
>>34532490
You expect to eventually naturally stumble upon someone who you'd get close to but it just never happens
>>34532504
Sounds like a different frame of reference. You either exist but do not participate or do not participate because you don't exist.

>>34532696
While I'm at it, I'll take the opportunaty to ask questions.

Have troubles remembering things? Have troubles imaginating? These two are somewhat still blurry within me, and I felt like asking.

For instance, it pretty much is like I only live on the instant. The red wire that we usually had when existing, consisting of knowing what you did the 5 minutes that just passed AND imaginating it, feeling it real, just stopped with me.

It pretty much is like if on the arrow of time, there was a bubble which would represent your perception of the near past and near future, but the bubble shrinked so much it's just there for the instant. Don't know if that makes sense

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>>34531606
Yes, I don't get attached to people. Doesn't matter who they are; family members, long-time classmates, coworkers, etc. The moment I'm not interacting with them, they become irrelevant.

I'll go somewhere new, meet people, hang around with them for weeks or months, and then leave to never see them again without notifying or missing them.

>guy I used to hang out with a lot texts me that he hasn't seen me in a while
>tell him I left that state and wasn't coming back
>he complains that I didn't tell him
>I ignore his texts
>go about my day

I've never loved anyone either, so I've never desired a gf.

I'm fine with it though. I don't feel lonely.

>>34532803
I get it. That's kind of how I feel but not that extreme. My bubble lasts about a month and everything past that feels like a very distant memory.

>>34532834
Yeah nah just sounds like you have some form of ASPD, doesn't sound like the same thing.

>>34533002
Anything that isn't on the instant feels like a very distant memory. :/

>>34533058
Maybe I'm approaching that state, or maybe now I'm just more aware of it. I wasn't like this before. You think there's someway to reverse it?

I miss when I was young and too dumb to realize how removed I was from normal life.

>>34533115
Actually it wasn't progressive for me. One night, my brain just switched something and I went into that state bettween sleeping and awaken.
A way to reverse it? I hope there's one. I'm seeing a psychiatrist for that. It will take years though, I think.

>>34533200
I'd say maybe avoid drugs. Now that I think about it I spent a couple of weeks drinking and smoking weed/cigarettes almost everyday and it felt exactly as you described. I quit all that shit cold turkey and it got better, not cured, but better.

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>>34531606
maybe being in peace with yourself is what you're looking for anon.

>>34533294
I actually don't do drugs of any kind, besides some occasional drinking that is waaaaaaaay below getting tipsy level.

And yeah, I know they could mess up with me big times. So I avoid it, even if I can't deny sometimes I crave something to rely on.

Kinda, I know its a legit meme but I truly believe I am schizoid or a mix and also socially anxious. I don't like want to hang out with people and its uncomfortable.

Also yeah that "void", people can sense it. Also a diagnosed high functioning sperg.

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