>tfw in the next 20 years you are going to be known as the

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A-at least I'm well-read, right...?

>>34512740
I've seen my future in a man who lives on the same street I grew up on. He wears cutoff denim shorts and a white (well it was white, now it's almost beige) tank top and he looks about 5'7 and 200, also has a greasy mop of unkempt hair. He leaves his house every couple of days to get his mail (barefoot), otherwise I never see him leave. I wonder if I should talk to him sometime. Probably would run back into his house if I said hi though.

I know plenty single middle-agers and most of them are cooler than the married ones.
Not like I'm gonna be one of those though.

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>older brother is married neet who lives in basement with wife and never plans on having children
>all cousins live half way across the world

I love children, they are so fun to hang around with. I'm too ugly and autistic to find someone to love me enough to start a family with, so I just hoped I'd get to be an uncle at least, but I'm doomed to a life of loneliness.

>>34512740
Nope. I'll be the cool uncle they always see with a hot new "gf" (really an escort) at his house every time they drop in by surprise.

i'm already that guy, though i don't have any nieces or nephews yet.

i get my mail at midnight because i don't want to talk to my neighbors.

>>34512947
That's kinda sad desu.

>>34513022
Is life comfy at that age living alone.

>>34512785
Does he look grumpy.

>>34513120
He kinda stamps around (bad case of the virgin walk) with his head down and I've never seen his eyes, I guess he looks grumpy.

>>34513194

Woah looking at our future guys. I hope he doesn't think of killing himself everyday.

>>34513236
He used to walk a dog everyday but stopped a few years back, dog must've died. If he didn't contemplate suicide then he sure does now.

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>>34513319

I don't want to end up like him anon

>>34513120
>Is life comfy at that age living alone.

i'm a sperg, so i love routines, and my life is one giant routine over and over. i never go out to eat, i am free to eat the same thing every day and i don't have anyone complaining that we ate this yesterday, etc. and no one is asking me to piss away money on a vacation - the last vacation i took was thanksgiving 2006. i have to travel for work a decent amount, but i will never again get on a plane for """"pleasure""""

i have fiber internet, several terabytes of carefully curated pornography stored on external hard drives for emergencies, and a couple pairs of very comfortable sweatpants.

my life is amazing.

I'm already the weird uncle.
>not allowed to see my kids
>considered paranoid by my relatives
>live in the middle of nowhere in an old farmhouse
>own a few guns and fiddle with computers all day
>rarely shave or get my hair cut
>go a mile a minute when I'm talking but keep going off on tangents and eventually forget what I was talking about

>>34514086
Ted? How....

>>34514118
My name's not Ted.

I'm not gonna be alive in 20 years and my sister never had kids. Now I sort of feel bad for my parents, I bet they thought life would turn out better than this...

>>34514242

Well they were living in a different situation compared to yours anon. It's not surprising their expectations are different.

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>>34513319
>dog must've died. If he didn't contemplate suicide then he sure does now.

That hit me like a fucking brick

>>34514131
Cmon Ted, quit goofin around. We gotta get this manure in the unmarked white van if we wanna Oklahoma City in time

>>34514682
My name isn't Ted. Please stop distracting me from my video game.

>>34514635
I've been looking for source on this for ages but nobody has it.

>>34514688
Ted. Teddy K, snap outta it buddy! We gotta hit the road!

I'm only gonna be a myth to them. They'll know I exist because my mom keeps in good contact with her family, but I haven't seen any of them in probably 4 years now and don't plan on seeing them again.

I would have thought my current self was the most kickass person ever when I was a kid.

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>>34512740

>one of my cousins is my best friend and he's as much of a robot as I am
>will probably never go to see my other cousins' children
feels good man

>>34512785
>start up a conversation with him
>learn more about his life as he opens up to you
>open up to him
>follow his advice to avoid ending up a loser like him
>achieve success
>plot twist
>he has cancer and is dying
>heartfelt scene when he lets you know it was worth it to see you becoming a functioning adult
>name your son after him
Talk to him bro

>>34512947
>>34513120
no thats awesome hahaha


escorts at least make money of whoring.

Also Ill be the rich yoked doctor uncle who drives a bmw and enjoys all the sluts attention while keeping pure for his Godess who maybe exists.

And then when the divorce start hitting all around Id be smiling in the eye of the storm, untouched, keeping all my toys forever and ever, never cucked, never broken.

At 40 Ill be the hero of every married man Ill know. THats a fact bois.

JOKES ON YOU I AM GOING TO KILL MYSELF ON SECOND MARCH THIS YEAR HAHAHA

I don't even have siblings. At worst I'll be that lonely cousin at the Christmas party

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>tfw my cousin who is the same age as me already has a kid

>everybody in this town already knows me as the weirdo who got my dick out in the middle of the bar and the security didnt even kick me out

>>34512740
You'll probably kill yourself before

>>34516314

Why haven't you moved out of your town yet.

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>>34512740
>feels good and

its original bitch

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>>34512740
>tfw 25 with 6 nieces and nephews
I already am.

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This thread is too comfy to die. I have two married siblings who I bet will have kids soon but I doubt I'll even be involved on their lives

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>>34512740
Hm, i wish i could be remembered or known as the weird uncle, all my brothers end up becoming a genetic dead end.
My older brother married an infertile woman, he is 50 now.
Middle brother is just loser like me, i was the last hope of my parents to give them a grandson or granddaughter

>>34515367
this post gave me feels

>>34515025
What's your current self anon?

>>34517672

And at new year's eves party, you will be known as the weird uncle and all your nieces will ask you weird questions.

>>34512740
>implying I'm not already that guy

They like me now but because they're 5 and younger. Surely the older they get their parents will tell them the truth