>get a match on tinder and somehow hit it off >coffee date

Idk OP you seem to be pretty good at making spaghetti

>>34380051
Should've actually been yourself. It's normie advice, but it has a bit of truth.

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>>34380051
No, you just forgot the lamb sauce

>>34380051
You could have gotten laid with any meat and veggie dish, but no you're the carbmaster apparently. Moron!

>>34380051

>macaroni pie
>mayonnaise soup

Jesus fucking christ man. I literally cannot imagine something worse tasting and looking than that. Complex food does not equal good food.

>>34380075
That's the worst advice to get a girl. Literally nobody is being himself on a first date.

>>34380111
His fuck up was not being himself, he lied about his cooking prowess.

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>>34380074
OP absolutely fucking obliterated

How do you screw up such an easy lay like that

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>>34380051
>mayonnaise soup

good fucking god OP, lmao

>>34380125
No his fuck up was being a sperg. He could have just said something like "Oh, I was sooo busy, let's go to the restaurant instead".

>>34380051
Did you know her tastes at least? If a girl made me mayonnaise soup I'd do the same thing she did to you. I fucking hate mayonnaise

>he didn't fall back on tacos
Mexican food is normie as fuck and requires zero brain power.
Consider it a lesson.

>Can't cook
>Decide to try hard dishes that can easily turn shit

Why? You could have easily cooked a steak and everyone would have been happy.

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>>34380051
>lie
>doesnt try it out before making the actual dinner date

>all these serious responses to this bait thread

I don't get how you're supposed to cook for a date. Like, do you just tell them to sit alone while you spend an hour in the kitchen? Do you make it before hand and start eating as soon as they get there? Ordering food in makes more sense.

should have kept it simple and cooked her a grilled charlie dude

>>34380051
>Disgusted by food
Why I hate normies reason number 41. Food is Food, your meant to put it in your mouth not evaluate it's appearance like it's the Mona Lisa. Though this probably means nothing to you anon but I'd personally love to try your food. Mayo soup sounds interesting as fuck, just don't be a woman and don't use that light mayo gayshit.

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>>34380051
>mayonnaise soup

>>34380107
What's your problem with macaroni pie?

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>>34380074
Kekkers, that was a good one.

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>>34380324
You have them help you with it, if they don't know you teach them to chop veggies or something, and while the stuff cooks you bang on the kitchen table.

>>34380051
>>34381248
This. Mayonnaise soup?? What the fucking fuck were you thinking OP?
At least macaroni pie can sound good, but you were bluffing.
>>34380185
This is what you should've done. You literally cook some meat, add some other ingredients and place them in a taco/burrito/whatever. Damn son.

>>34380051
this was obviously your final test before getting laid, and you failed miserably. the fact she invited herself over was an invitation for sex yet somehow you fucked that up

Look, it just sounds like you picked the wrong recipes.
WTF even is mayonnaise soup?
You should have asked her what she liked to eat. If you're cooking mac n' cheese pie and mayonnaise based dishes, she will think you're into eating a lot of fat and greasy stuff, which isn't cute.
If she tells you she likes certain meals, cook that or something similar.
Otherwise, try something light and easy! Heavy stuff is never fun on a date because you feel gross after eating it (and your digestion gets fucked, especially for her if she usually eats lighter stuff), which means sex is completely out of the question.

I think you did a good job trying, and I think it's a shame that one mistake snowballed so far into a huge disaster! But it's okay, because it means you know what you can improve for next time.

Good luck! You have potential!

>>34380210
OP would have made the Steak Well Done so in the end it didnt really matter

btfo

you shoulda just invited your mom over to cook for you

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>>34380107
Huh. Even the most blatant joke gets a serious reply here. You must be barely sentient.

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>mayo soup

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>>34382147
Probably a bassmouth pickaninny if ya catch my drift