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I'm a horrible person, /r9k/ ;-;
>be me
>short cuteboi
>bisexual, albeit repressed homosexual urges
>sick of shitty luck with women on Tinder (and just shitty luck, in general)
>just want someone to like me
>want to be the object of someone's desire
>want to be paid attention to
>need compliments
>set my tinder preferences to men and women
>within a couple days, get a shit ton of matches
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>inbox FILLS UP with compliments from friendly homo dudes!!
>feel good about myself for once
>feel happy
>meet sadboy who lives near me
>go over to his place in a drunken stupor, one night
>it's kinda awkward, but then we cuddle for a few hours
>i am the little spoon
>he reaches down and touches my weewee
>tells me to voice my discomfort if it gets weird
>he's nice and cuddly
>start to feel weird after the alcohol wears off
>"i-it's pretty late and i need to go home, anon"
>he walks me home
>wake up the next day and feel weird
>FUCKING DELETE MY TINDER APP
>feel disgusting and regretful
>fast forward a couple months later
>one day, i randomly start being afraid of seeing him at our university
>tfw i literally saw him at the uni dining hall that day
>tfw i just bullshitted and stumbled my way out of a conversation
>"th-things changed in my life and i had to cut a lot of people off :'(:
>him: "i hope we'll talk again some time soon :)".
>this was a couple days ago
>i haven't re-downloaded the app or tried to contact him
>tfw i am a horrible person
>tfw i don't want to hurt people ;-;
>>
Just talk to him you fag. Stop being such a goddamn fag and fuck him.
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>>34232368
>someone liked you
>someone touched your wiener and actually cared about whether or not you were comfortable with it
>he is also a "sad boy" and probably cute
what are you doing
this could be the difference between having someone to do things with and shitposting on /r9k/ all day
>>
>>34232368
At least you didn't fuck him
I made that mistake and now I feel disgusting
Luckily no one, that I know, knows
I just need to avoid being a dumbass and telling someone
Fuck I didn't even enjoy it at all. I just wanted to feel wanted for once and gays are so much easier
>>
fags are like women
bullshitting liars
>>
OP I'm sure he is fine that a one night stand of his didn't work out. Gay guys (especially gay university aged guys) get a lot of action. You're projecting your loneliness and longing onto him. You didn't hurt him. He is fine.
If you're actually bi (and not just seeking attention wherever you think you'll find it) then there isn't really a problem in your post. With that being said, that you weren't looking for a guy initially, coupled with the fact you could only see him while drunk, points to this being some kind of cry for attention/warmth, which is worrying.
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>>34232712
Are you claiming that I am a bullshit liar, because if so, that's true, but I kind of want to make things right. At least I feel like a horrible person.
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>>34232749
But why exactly were you unconfortable? Didn't you like him?
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>>34232747
Dunno, anon. I've been attracted to men and women since like high school. I just don't feel right about the homosexual stuff. It rubs me the wrong way; probably because of how I was raised.
When I saw him, he seemed kind of sad-ish, but you're right that gay dudes get a lot of action, so maybe it's not something I should feel too bad about :( He may have even forgotten about it for a while. Who knows? But like, seeing him on that day was so surreal. Especially because I'd just stared thinking that morning about whether or not I'd see him. It felt like karma.
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>>34232792
I just was. I started to feel weird about it. Dunno, anon. I think I have been raised a certain way and I just subconsciously see gay stuff as weird and unholy, as a result.
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>>34232817
Try to see beyond that. Would you be happy and comfortable with having a gay relationship?
For now and while you think about that, try to make conversation and be nice to him.
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>>34232817
Bruh maybe you aren't gay and you're just desperate don't force yourself just because you had gay urges doesn't make you completely gay everyone has gay urges they just hide that shit really good trust me on this you're probably just really desperate and you're probably going to end up hating it like for gods sake anon you had to get drunk just to fuck him don't let these trap fags confuse you gay guys get a lot of attention from gay guys only because they are gay it's extremely easy to fuck a gay dude especially if you're somewhere good looking just stop being so fucking desperate bruh and actually talk to a girl
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>>34232817
And stop feeling bad for every little thing you do like why would he feel bad cause you ain't wanna fuck god man grow some balls you were the little spoon you was probably about to get fucked in the ass drunk bruh all because of how desperate and lonely you are like if you really want girls to like you stop acting like one
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>>34232817
Is it as strong as your attraction for women though? My attraction for women is ridiculously strong. My body reacts on its own when I see a girl I like. On the other hand I am not attracted to men outside of porn or fantasies. I can stay with the a bunch of naked men in a sauna without feeling sexual,unless I will myself into thinking sexually.
If no, then I advise you to not pursue this relationship further. There' no "mostly straight/homo" bisexuals, there's only deluded heterosexuals and faggots in denial. Actual bisexuality is rarer than homosexuality, and I don't think you really are bisexual.
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>>34232368
Its ok if your not gay OP. Dont feel bad for him and dont lie to nobody just for a hugh. Its a bit pathetic.
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