Write awkward love letters to people who will never read them

I'm hiding the thread hope you don't mind op.

>>34179537
>hiding the thread
What does that mean?

Clem if you're reading this please just tell me why you left, I already know why, but tell me anyway so I don't have to ask anymore. Please Clem it's all I ask

>>34179488
its my fault i didnt know better. like any other human being i make mistakes. thats the way it is. do you get it?

>>34179567
he's blocking the screen with his hand so he doesn't have to see it

>>34179488
I love you so much and you'll never even know I wish you would be mine but you'll never be more than a friend

>>34179567
Mimi for phoneposters lets you hide cancerous trap threads etc. Idk if hiding is a thing for the PC master race.

I love you, i hope you kill yourself.

To my dearest beloved,

There are no words to properly convey how I feel for you. My dear, I love you more than anything. You are the light of my life and I'm glad you chose me, thank you. I'm the luckiest man in the world and I'm blessed to be able to spend time with you. Darling, when you came into my life I was at my lowest and darkest point, and like an angel you descended and delivered me from it. I'll love you forever, in this life and the next. To me, you're perfect. You're so beautiful, smart, and funny. I always said that I didn't want a family, but I think I'd be willing to try with you. My love, to me you're worth more than all the riches in the world, thank you for being in my life.

Forever yours, Anon

How was it robots? How would you feel if you received this letter?

>>34179833
I would fuck you in the ass and slap you for good measure

>>34179931
Sweet

Most original post, I swear

>>34179833
I would probably neck. Or never talk with you, since all of that is just manipulating emotions.

>>34179995
Damn, cold af

>>34179833
I would let you fuck me in the ass no question asked.

>>34180046
Bout to blow that asshole out

ayo gurl

i like u u feel me u kno im sayin bby

sin sear lee
ur man u kno it bae

>>34179488

Dear R

My curiosity about you had been piqued when my friend told me about what you said while sexting with her; you were too much of a freak for her, but I loved it. I didn't even know what you actually looked like until Sophomore year though. I could tell you had high quality genes from the moment I saw you. In fact, many other people had too. You'd had many partners leading up to that point and were only 15 (I believe).

You were of taller than normal stature and were very active in sports. You were pale and lean, which shows that you will age well in the long run. Though I did not consciously realize this, your pheromones were likely quite complimentary to mine as my physiology primed me for mating whenever I spent time near you.

Your hair is of naturally high quality as well. It is soft and smooth and many people play with it. This is a very positive attribute, as your high quality hair genes would make up for my poor quality hair genes in hypothetical offspring.

Another extreme asset is your extensive list of paraphilias, most notably autogynephilia. People with paraphilias tend to be more interesting sexually, and people with autogynephilia in particular have an average IQ of nearly 130. I personally believe that autogynephilia is a form of male peacocking in a very passive sense: it tells the surrounding females "Hey look, I'm intelligent and can be just like you, empathizing with the female experience.". It's fantastic.

Your fantastic sex drive and your desire for (and apparent success in finding) numerous sexual partners makes you a prime genetic investment, as this has been considered the ideal for males during much of history. Our theoretical progeny would have much success in their sexual pursuits, therefore continuing the genetic line.

(Much of this is just theoretical since neither of us want biological kids, but the production of these hypothetical spawn is what best drives human mating behavior.)

... (cont.)

>>34180473

... (cont.)

At any rate, my rational mind seems to agree with my biology on the adoration I have for you, which is quite rare for me indeed. Often I will stand up after an interaction with you, even if it's short and somewhat at a distance, and the insides of my pants will be covered in vaginal secretions down much of my thighs in hopes of copulation.

Please allow me to suck on your phallus.

~With oxytocin,

Anon

Keri, I wish that we could at least talk like we used to again. I'm too embarrassed to keep trying to talk to you when it seems like you only entertain me when you're bored and when you do you're a totally different person than you used to be. I just miss it more the last few weeks for some reason. I don't know.

i also still love you years later for some stupid reason and hate myself for it i kind of wish you'd just be even more of a complete bitch to me so i could hopefully stop but to be honest i still probably wouldn't because i'm so fucked up i'd probably actually like it

>>34179593
This is missing multiple punctuation marks.

>>34180922
>i kind of wish you'd just be even more of a complete bitch to me so i could hopefully stop but to be honest i still probably wouldn't because i'm so fucked up i'd probably actually like it
Why do people say only females like mean people when males do too?

hey girls and boys. lmao. this crackhead neckbeard just sent me this:

"your pheromones were likely quite complimentary to mine as my physiology primed me for mating whenever I spent time near you."
"You would make a prime genetic investment."
"Our theoretical progeny would have much success in their sexual pursuits, therefore continuing the genetic line."

thoughts?
>tell me you're not dripping wet or hard as diamonds right now.

>>34181208
I am proud of this letter. This is my creation.

Also I don't have access to drugs and can't grow a beard lmao...

>>34180473
>the production of these hypothetical spawn is what best drives human mating behavior.)

You have no soul. You sound like a robot.

>>34181754
>literally informing someone that they sound like a robot on FUCKING /R9K/
You don't know what you're doing here normie get out.
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

This thread reminds me of my depression.

D.

As you may have noticed already, you have caught glimpses of my most inner self and realized that under all this shelling of apathy and cynism lies a romanticist.
For years i have secluded myself from the industrial and inhuman degeneracy that has overcome the planet and my resentment slowly made me into who i am today, a broken man who has nothing but hate for the modern peoples yet deep inside wishes for comfort.

When i saw you for first time i was stunned as if i had seen a ghost from older times. Such a travesty that i could only consider a proper lady such as yourself nothing more than a ghost or a hallucination of my flayed mind,this is the state of our modern times.
Your aparition has made such a burning impression on my psyche that i have invested countless hours on learning about you since then that i have lost track of the unending dread that clouded my existance and i have noticed something i had long forgotten of its existance inside me, a glimmer of hope for this wretched world.
If you could gift me with your company at this adress at this time i will more than gladly serve us a handmade feast and we could inquire about each other in a proper manner.

My regards,anon.

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>want to write an awkwawrd love letter
>tfw no one to even write it to

>>34182403
Then think about that ideal you daydream about fucking faggot

>>34179567
>>34179616
Proof that this board is nothing but newfags

>>34180983
I don't know. They're my preference. I guess I'm just so used to being treated like shit I crave it now or something.

I love you Shirley. You have a great, bubbly personality.

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>>34182426
All my idealized women are fictional characters from cartoons and video games though.
I'm not writing a love letter to a fiction character, I can just escapism for that if I want to..

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>>34182524
>he doesnt even have an imaginary gf

fucking normalfag get out

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>>34182549
>having an imaginary gf
>when you could have a wife

I aint telling you who my waifu is, but she is pure and loves me very much just like I love her.
You, 3dpd poster, are the normalfag here if anyone is.
Unless of course you want to talk to me about how your tulpa is doing, or how your last astral projection went, or how lucid your last dream with your waifu was.
This isn't my waifu but I need animu girl pictures to post with and I don't have my reaction image folder with me at the moment.

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>>34182670
I will NOT fuck around with homebrewed schizophrenia.
Nice kikebook filename faggot.

>>34179488
your fragile little body in combination with your sad resting face made me fall in love with you on first sight.

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>>34182771
Did you not just read my spoiler you retarded dickweed?
I'm pulling these images off of Google image search, sorry I didn't edit my triggering filename of which I didn't realize was associated which facebook, something I'm sure a normie like you would know plenty about.

Now personally I too will not undergoe self induced schizophrenia, at least not yet.
For me, I'd rather immerse myself in a VN / dating sim or just imagine scenarios with a respective fictional grill I've fallen in love with/
For you my friend, I have no reason to believe that you aren't doing anything more than just memeing at me.

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>>34182922
i know senpai, no need to get rude

I know about goybook filenames because i stalk ex schoolmates with huge tits, fucking casual.

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>>34182951
>still lusts for 3dpd
>has ex schoolmates available to stalk
>has the urge to call me a casual

>>34180473

Just realized I used the word "fantastic" twice in too rapid a succession. I am disappointed in my lack of self-awareness to realize this and use a thesaurus before posting.

No awkward love letter here, but reply back to me already T! You fucking faggot!

Getting more over you by the minute. I guess it's for the best because I like you but I don't really see anything good forming between the two of us. I'm still lonely though and hearing from you would be very nice.

>>34183160
Fuck I did it again with the word "realize". I am feeble-minded; my brain is aging too fast. I always feel like my life should be ending shortly, though I am still in my teens.

>>34183160
>>34183207
Don't stress so much. No one really notices or cares.

>>34183241
Thank you fellow robot (m8) :).

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>>34183407
Np.

An original comment

K,

After talking to you for a few brief moments I'm reminded that you are just as emotionally and personally stunted as you were when we broke up. You have yet to grow, learn, accept new and different viewpoints and things. You just learned different values, casted your old ones away and think that these new ideals are you changing and turning into a more "well rounded person".

To be fair, any person who tries to convince anyone else to smoke weed is a joke. Including coming from you who looked down upon others with extreme prejudice that even made me cringe. Then to be called sheltered and how a sheltered person could enjoy it? You don't even know that you can smoke yourself stupid, I know more shit about weed than you do and I don't even smoke the shit.

The worst part about this? While I feel disgusted, it makes me want to try to get you back as my girlfriend and help you grow as a person. You are almost 25 and you are still immature as fuck. Your influences suck and I don't believe you are in the worlds best emotional environment for you to grow as a person.

But then again, maybe you are just a shitty person deep down and there is no changing that... I sure hope not. I really hope I don't love a person with a shit personality that will never grow.

Either way, I might try to actually attempt to be half assed in your life maybe. Who knows. Honestly, I just want to cut you off from everyone else because after these three years you got nothing to show for it.

Hey love,
I'm in the midst of another bout of depression. You're being a dumb bitch and I can't bring myself to care.
Just leave me alone for a while.

Dear S,
I hadn't met anyone I found attractive in years until I met you. I wish I got to know you when I had the chance, but I was too much of a sperg. Even if you wouldn't have dated me, I would have loved to be your friend. I know very little about you so I don't have anything more to say.

~ Anon

S,
If you're anything like me you'll never be happy. But maybe we could be unhappy together. It beats being alone and it beats any other interpersonal interaction I can think of off the top of my head. I hope we have better distant futures.
-O

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>>34185129

Surname initial for either of those pl0x

>>34179738
>>34183183
relatable

origanu

C,
I'd like to tell you that I love you but I worry about how you'd react. Perhaps we would never work since you live hundreds of miles away but I'd like to try. I need you in my life. I'm glad I met you. I hope we could have a future together even if we spend years apart.
Ever hopeful,
L

>>34179488
You're the only girl I know who I don''t make me feel like a weird awkward loser talking to so, uh, we should do something some time.

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>>34179488
Dear M,

I don't think I ever would've talked to you if you hadn't pursued me so aggressively. You sat next to me in class, talked to me, approached me over facebook, invited me to go with the library with you that one time. The truth is I found you very intimating. Why was a beautiful girl (and believe me, you are beautiful) talking to me so much out of all the other people in the class? To this day I still don't know why.

I have a lot of trouble being myself around you. When I talk with my friends I make all sorts of silly jokes and I like to think I'm a funny person but when I'm around you I just clam up, out of fear I might say or do something stupid that might offend you. I think whatever hope I might've had with you might've been destroyed by me being such poor company. The truth is I don't even know how to talk to someone like you.

It's kind of cruel, don't you think. To approach a guy for no real reason and make him think maybe you're interested and then to start ignoring him when he tries talking to you. I never would've felt anything for you had you not started talking to me first. Maybe I just didn't live up to your expectations or maybe I just misinterpreted it completely. If that was the case, I want to know why it is you approached me in the first place. Pity? Were you just looking for friends and sat next to the guy who wasn't talking to anyone else?

I'm sad you won't be in my classes this year. I'm sad that the fact you keep turning me down everytime I suggest we do something together means I may never see you in person again. I guess I'm just sad and confused and lonely.

- R

>>34182951
>try to look at old classmate's pictures
>need an account

FUCK

>>34185129
>If you're anything like me you'll never be happy. But maybe we could be unhappy together.
For some reason this reminds me of John Green.

Our mutual friends ask me what I see in you. They think you treat me badly and there is some truth to that, though I wouldn't describe it as bad - just kinda unfair, but I don't think I'm entitled to anybody being fair to me, given that I can just, well, stop being friends with you which would lead to me stopping crushing on you sooner or later. Though considering we're gonna travel abroad together this year, it isn't that easy either, but again: I could say "no" to that idea. I allow it myself. Why do I allow it?
There's a lot of things I see in you. You surely confirmed what I thought before: I'm attracted to ridiculous humor sense and funny people in general. I sometimes feel bad for making jokes about you with others, but dude, you're funny as hell, and I mean it in a charming, attractive way. You make me laugh with no effort. Also with your sharp remarks. Pretty sure it contributes to how much I like you the most, especially since you're so bad at opening up and talking straight-forwardly about your feelings. When you're down or mad for an unknown reason, sometimes seemingly for no reason, I wonder what's wrong; I can't figure you out, but I wish I could reach out to you. I know you've got issues. I want you to open up to me. I got a weak spot for people like you - the ones who have their fair deal of problems, and yet they don't feel entitled to any help at all. Instead they help others, like you help your brother and sister, even though they don't support you that much in return. Well, perhaps it relates to the fact you caused them trouble in the past, so now you're just "paying off the debt"; still when I see people like you, I just want to help them, and I try to support you as much as I can - perhaps this is why our friends think you treat me badly, because I offer you that with nothing in return, but they don't know it's because I think right now you don't get much in return for what you give to others, so I try to give you what they didn't give you.

>>34188888
It makes me so ridiculously happy when I see you happy, for that reason I listened about that RP character of yours eagerly, and drew him for you and all, even though inside I get a little annoyed when you say this game is your only source of happiness and you'd rather RP with teenage girls than meet me and your sister l-lol but your sister gets mad at you for that so whatever, it's on my behalf too. heh.
Anyways, aside of that weakness of mine for humor sense and "givers", I feel we're similar to each other when it comes to you know, everyday stuff. We're both kinda artistic and we got similar tastes when it comes to TV shows and movies, though you're also into youtube stuff, but when you play me that it's actually enjoyable - some of those videos are even something I'd watch by myself if I knew it exists earlier. Also similar attitude towards work, similar "extroverted but not exactly" personality, no need for thrills, no big expectations of life. Sometimes up for a drink and a smoke; nothing of all that "muh healthy lifestyle" stuff (though we could probably both use some working out - I swear I'm gonna ask you one day if you don't want to start going to a gym which is close to both of our workplaces). Kinda like, being happy with what you get. Maybe I'm wrong about you and I just project those on you, who knows. Maybe I should just send you a letter like that so you can tell me "I'm not like that at all! I hope for a rich, handsome man to come in my life and take me on adventures" or something. I'm not rich, I'm not handsome, and I'm not adventurous, but I think I can show you some of my world and make you enjoy it - and I feel you'll enjoy it, because I feel we're similar. I hope I'll get to show you some of Paris when we go there this year, maybe I'll get a Parisian I know from couchsurfing or somebody I met there 2 years ago to show us around and make it more interesting with personal stories and all.

>>34188904
Of course aside of all that I simply find you pretty. I think it's cute when you give an awkward smile, or the smug one, christ I love the smug one lol. Or when you make those weird faces (it's hilarious your siblings sometimes make exactly the same ones too lol). Or when you say something and are like "wait, I was supposed to just think that, not say". Or when next to stairs or something you put one of your legs on it and pretend you're looking badass. Or how you kinda cover your mouth when you laugh. I think I somewhat picked it up from you, or maybe you picked it up from me? Hell knows. We keep picking up habits from each other all the time.
You look kinda cool sometimes. You looked cooler in that black coat last year than in this oversized one, though. But you look really cool with a guitar. I want to see and hear you playing violin, seriously. You promised me you'll play for me r-reeee

Well, that was a long and cringeworthy text I wrote, but it's not like I'll ever man up enough to tell you that - or see a real point in telling you that besides of getting it off my chest. I know you don't like me that much. Writing it down made me feel a little lighter, I suppose.
It'd be cool if you also liked me, though. I think a relationship between two people like us would require a lot of work, but could also be rewarding. I'll never know, though, probably because you don't even see me as a man, let alone a potential partner. Hope I learn how to let you go in the future.

Cheers