>finally text a girl >nanana skipping a bunch of shit cause

part of becoming a better person is accepting the inevitability of death
not saying to kys or anything but theres always gonna be bad days or bad weeks or whatever, but the important thing is remembering the good shit

There's nothing, I mean nothing wrong with being alone. Some normies will make a big deal out of it cause they're too weak to carry themselves. I've seen few that are in relationships because their partner is an extra to their own happiness, and thus they don't really need a partner. Enjoy yourself anon, at the end of the day you are the only person responsible for your happiness. It takes time to learn tis, hell it hurts even, but everyday gets a little it better.

>>34150613
Oh, if only you knew.
I haven't had a good day in years. My life switches between bad days and ok days. I can't tell you the last time I felt good. It just doesn't happen anymore.
I can't sleep, so I stay awake for hours and hours making myself more miserable. For hours and hours I am completely alone.

It's gotten to the point now where my chest hurts constantly, I feel weak, and out of energy, boredom and tiredness plague my mind, and every day, every day it becomes so much harder to do nothing. I can't work I can't think I can't do anything. That's how much pain I'm in. I'm already fucking dead, I'm just waiting for my body to catch up with me.

>>34150694
But I don't want to be alone. It's not like I care how people see me, and it's not like I care about sex, hell I don't ever care if it's a girl I just want to find someone who takes the pain away. All this misery all this depression, I want to hold someone sometimes, I want them to tell me everything is going to be alright. I want them to take the pain away.

I can't do that myself

>>34150820
First off, you would be surprised at what you can do. It's nothing I can prescribe advice for really, just something you need to keep trying to improve on.

If you really need someone look into support groups, or try a group activity like D&D or something.

I recently started a fish tank, it's given me a reason to get up in the morning and something to look forward to after classes, even if i'm still cycling the tank.

Maybe try branching out into a new hobby?

>>34151031
I'd love to, but I just don't enjoy anything anymore. A part of me really just doesn't want to feel better I guess you could say.
Maybe a part of me doesn't want to accept, or settle. I hate the feeling of helplessness. It makes me sick. I hate the idea that I can't do anything but take it.

Is it really too much to expect from this life just one person who cares about you? Is it so hard that I must learn to live with being alone? That out of the billions and billions of people on this earth, asking for just one to have enough compassion to care about me is too much?

>>34151246
Again being alone is underrated by a milestone and can even be seen as taboo. It's not that bad, and from the sound of your post you may be alone for a long time, or forever. It dose not look good if you don't fake it. if you do fake it till you make it then congratz anon. Though you might not make it, and in my experience it hurts like hell to fake it knowing no one give a fuck about what you feel, they just want to be entertained or whatever fits your personal situation. Point is, either try your best or simple give up. I did and I'm better off than when I toiled over being in relationship or not. Yet here I am still in r9k, talk about irony. There are more ways to cope and be happy in life over finding some person to be there with you, remember that. Then again you very well might find someone, who knows. I hope you do.