Could someone please explain in elaborate detail how one goes

>>34104968
I haven't shat in a public restroom since like, 2001.

Even then it was inside of a Longs Department store.

>>34104968
M8, there are situations where you can not NOT shit in a public bathroom.

>>34104968
You have to wean yourself off having living conditions that aren't africa tier

Oh also, cover the seat in literally 10000 feet of toilet paper to really dial up the waste created by the joos toilet paper

>>34104968
Use headphones while you're shitting. If you can't hear anyone in there, it's like you have privacy. As for the toilet paper, you just have to use a very effective wiping style as to nor injure yourself. I suggest lifting your leg up and to the side in order to gain maximum access.

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>>34104968
I usually only do if there is no other choice. as in the impeding colon explosion will shatter my bowels beyond repair. even then, I dont really give a fuck on what sort of ungodly shit symphony plays out from my anus. The normies waiting in line for the stall can enjoy the sweet sounds of release.

I don't get why this is an issue for people. The other people in the bathroom know why you're there and they're doing the same thing.

>How do you even use public washroom toilet paper? It's like newspaper it's impossible to wipe your ass

Use a lot.

>>34104968
have diarrhea, it becomes very easy then

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I can't pee at a urinal, because of psychological reasons
But I can shit just fine

>>34104968
I just try to focus on the current business and get it over with.

My pride is not above bowel pain

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I get naked every time i use the poop.

Pro tip: as soon as the poop hits the water FLUSH, it minimizes stench a bit
ruffle paper or something to hide the plop sound, or just flush just before it plops so the sound covers it up
inb4 faggot some of us aren't naturally pooniggers and like to keep some sense of decency in public desu senpai

>>34105068
I retain it untill I get home. Public means filthy.

>>34105047
But your ass bleeds way before you're even done

>>34104968
>wait till everyone else is gone
>pretend you're doing something else

What I can't do is use urinals. I don't like the fact that people can see me pee.

>>34105856
how the fuck do you retain a torrent of liquid shit? do you squat heavy?

>>34105888
Lol mate it could be worse
>be edgy teen
>get prince albert piercing i.e. two hole's in my uretha
>whenever I piss sometimes an extra stream just fires of in a random direction

standing at the urinal next to others is a risky game

>>34105891
I practice since childhood. I just can't go to public stall.

>>34105888
Same here. My piss stream has extreme velocity and unless I take a step back I splatter myself and everything around it.

I try to avoid it as much as possible, but I've had to shit a couple times at work. I find it really helps if I put headphones on and turn some music up. Then I can't hear if anyone else enters so I won't be anxious about them hearing me shit, I just pretend I'm in my own world.

>>34106060
Do you also pretend that bacterias don't exist ?

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>out in public
>lots of people everywhere
>need a shit really bad
>toilets have a huge queue

I even have nightmares about this.

I just put a shit load of toilet paper around the seat

>lay a bunch of toilet paper/paper seats on the ground, essentially 3 "steps"
>one for each foot (use later), third for your shoes
>take off your shoes and pants/underwear and put it all in your backpack or hang them in a blob on the coathanger/rail
>spread ass and squat over toilet by using two toilet paper steps you made on the ground
>release then wipe
>clean up

Fuckin ez, quick, and clean.

Who else doesn't flush public toilets?

>>34106273
I won't flush if I take a really impressive shit. I'll just leave it there as a show of dominance to the other bathroom patrons.