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Robots, I'm curious: what made you fail at it, and what one thing you genuinely regret?
For me, as an only kid, my mother kept treating me like I was a frail sick child all through my late adolescence. My dad was distant and let my mother raise me.
Basically my mom wanted to control all my relationships and basically never wanted me to go out. She established an environment where it was best for me to not talk to anyone that wasn't my parents. She was also very physically abusive, countless were the nights where I ended up bruised up in my room crying like a little bitch.
Because of the constant stress, I ended up with a very fucking visible chronic skin disease for life.
The only people that were supposed to be there for me (because I didn't have and still no have real friends) were distant, authoritative and abusive. I ended up being socially awkward and distant. To this day, I don't consider anyone my friend, and I don't trust anyone. I do have "acquaintances" that I frequent on the weekends.
I tried to move on, and I probably just did (moved out of parents house, decent position in a big corp and I'm just 22), but the pain is there and it can't go away, it can be ignored for days or weeks but it returns.
Everyday I rejoice over the idea of knowing that I can just kill myself whenever I want (if I ever get the balls).
Also I'm mildly high and I probably shed a tear or two while writing this.
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Its silly but being so insecure over my skinnyfat body really ruined me. Also not having an assertive bone in my body while fully embracing being an outsider.
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>>34102355
Hey, we might have the same mom.
Mine held me back in kindergarten because she thought I 'wasn't ready', and then had my first serious girlfriend break up with me because apparently I'm unmotivated and would just drag her down.
She's the only woman who'll ever love me, so it's weird to be mad at her, but its definitely there.
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>>34102355
Shit, man. I feel sorry for you. I don't know what to say except some normie-tier platitude about keeping your head up .
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>>34102355
Diagnosed with Crohns disease at 15 which turned my anxiety into overdrive, made me very much Auschwitz mode skinny and likely stunted a bit of growth as well, if not through malnutrition then the meds i was on. Because of this of course girls were not interested (not that they were before) - because who would show any interest in a skinny, sickly-pale, manlet. Also the steroids i was put on (not the muscle kind) basically makes you skinnyfat, so then there's that.
Also because of the illness i guess i had the same problem as you in that i was always treated as sickly and frail by my parents even when i was in remission. And still am to some extent which really fucks you up psychologically.
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Lack of self belief, bad genetics.
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share your stories pls, I wanna deeply understand the root of autism
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>>34103325
my parents and grandparents didn't know they were grooming me to be an autistic manchild when they lovingly spoiled me as a kid
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>>34102355
>what made you fail
Two horrifically unfit parents, one fucked off. So I was raised by my mother and grandmother. Both crazy smothering religious people. That really did a number on me
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>>34103351
>they were grooming me to be an autistic manchild
fuck these words pefectly sum it up except "they" is my mom and my mom constantly used to hit me.
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>>34102355
My parents never really cared about me. They only cared for their orders to be obeyed and that I kept getting good grades so I could fulfill my role as trophy son. They divorced when I was 9 and it just made them more dysfunctional. I managed to get by in school by being the class crown, but going back to home was just a torment. I don't remember feeling anything else other than abandonment, rage, and loneliness.
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>>34103325
actually having diagnosed autism would maybe be the issue at least for me
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>>34102355
I don't understand, how is your mom treating you like shit a failure that you regret on your part?
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i am such a stupid fucking faggot i literally got high and played video games WHILE DATING THE WOMAN OF MY DREAMS and then she leaves me after 2 years
if i wasnt FUCKING STUPID i could have stopped the chain of events that led to her leaving
FUCK FUCK FUCK WHY WHY WHY
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>>34103877
Shit I forgot the regret part.
I regret that I didn't have a norma adolescence or childhood, you know all the teens hanging around at the movies in all the hollywood movies? I never really had that, or friends like that.
I hanged out around in high school like 10 times or less. I pretty much only played with the kids from my neighbor, who are all 2 years younger than me on average, and they just see me as the edgy bad influence guy that does drugs and alcohol.
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>>34103907
Ocean Beach?
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