Has anyone considered joining a cult? I just want to belong

>>29301073
I've never found one that sounded agreeable.

wouln't you just be there because you have to? i don't think itd give a sense of belonging, or people would feel real care towards you, theyd just talk to you because thats what their cult does.
have you tried fandomming? personally i haven't had much success making friends in fandoms, but a lot of people have, and in the good moments you get to feel some really nice feelings of closeness and belonging to other people

I'd rather start my own

>>29301073
Please explain why a cult is the first thing that comes to your mind when you imagine a sense of belonging. Why not the military, or a sports team, or a church?

Try a church first anon, less deadly

>>29301189
0% chance you have the charisma for it

Dont be a fucking sheep OP. Its disgusting. Like in my college, losers entering the political student groups and repeating their beliefs just because they feel included. Weaklings.

There are 7 different cults that rule the world. 4 major, 3 minor.

The Saturnian cult , Solar cult, Lunar cult, and Stellar cult (rumored defunct) are the major.

The Volcano cults, Mushroom cults, and Venus cults are the minor.

Ask me anything.

>>29301215
>tfw you absolutely have the charisma for it, not because you are generally charismatic but because you are charismatic to people with self-esteem issues
>tfw you're a decent person so do not get to use your god given talent.

>>29301262
You should at least become a personal trainer or supplement salesman.

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>>29301073
>tfw your internet cult falls apart over the years and you're alone again

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cults aren't fun bro. Not fun in the slightest. you have to throw everything out the window, even your own bodies natural impulses that are screaming "NOOO this is fucked up and retarded" and blindly give into their shit.

>>29301073
Yes, but I didn't do it because it's so obvious they prey on people like us and screwing us over is their business model.

>>29301291
>personal trainer
fat
>supplement salesman
decent person

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>>29301073
Join the Stanley cult, practically the whole of r9k is member.

Join ISIS


Loll no originality xjjdfnck

>>29301251
how long you been off your meds

Why don't we start a Robot Commune? We can kick capitalist Chads and Stacies out. Share the NEETbux

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Devote your mind to the Grand Machina and revoke your pathetic flesh of blood and tendon, embracing that of steel and silicon.

There is no greater belonging than being another cog in The Machine.

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i doubt any cult would want me

>>29301368
This guy is just cringey desu familia

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You belong here with us anon

when you look into /r9k/ culture it's pretty much a vagina-worshipping cult already

>>29301386
Robots literally divide everything by class and constantly compete with each other over the most mundane shit. They're also completely antisocial. Many are neets who relish the fact that they can parasitically survive on the hard work of others.

Communism would never ever work here.

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>>29301073
Then join the cult of another board

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>>29301073

Sounds like you want to be a Traditionalist Roman Catholic* - that is, hated both by non-Catholics and Catholics.

The problem in joining anything is always the same - their rules, their habits. "Belonging" has an increasing cost (in money, patience, time, social life...)


*at least is much more macho than joining some gay sect or fag cult. Better singing Gregorian chants than being like in the related pic with those queer and stupid songs.

>>29301544
That's because they get shit on by the current society and normies and become resentful. NEETs are a necessity of capitalism too to keep wages down, not their fault. We just need to help each other out and reward each other without Chad shitting on us. Robots are clever.

>>29301073

you better believe it. you're posting in one.

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>>29301073
I've posted the same feel before. I don't think I could convince myself to believe whatever they spout but I sure would play along. I think it would be nice. Might even get a cult gf. There is one I know of that assigns you a wife.

>>29301205
Christianity is a cult, anon. All religions are.
*Tips fedora*

>>29301251
Tell me more about them, anon.

>>29301251
this post made my day lmao

>>29301251
i'm so down to join this mushroom cult

>>29301073

Alienated young men are definitely the most at-risk group for being lured into cults or cult-like environments, so I would highly doubt you're alone.

This is why posting about enlisting is so common as well. "I just want a big, strong institution to take over my life."

>>29301251

Please continue, I'd love to read whatever is going to happen here.

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In thy name let us behold the father.
From the depths of the waters I come,
And from the depths the Deep Ones also have come.
Hail to the ancient dreams.
Hail to Dagon.

>>29301073
If you ever join a cult don't have children. There's nothing worse for child than being brought up strictly religious. Basically me until HS.

>>29305308
>don't have children

I don't think we have to worry about that anon.

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im in this cult!!! aaaaaaauuuurghhhh!!!! grrrrrrr!!!! rooooaaaaaarrrr!!