So Im just shooting from the hip with this and I already know

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So Im just shooting from the hip with this and I already know most guys on here will say the obvious, like kill yourself or this is stupid, or something along the lines of that, but essentially Ive got one foot in the grave, im 24 years old I live at home with my mom, I rely on her for everything.
Im addicted to pain meds, to make it short and simple Im asking if anyone has a miracle in a bottle, any bit of information that can save my life, any home remedies, or any advice that can actually be used, I get them from different places, here and there, its a hit and miss habbit with highs and lows, mostly lows... and for the past 4 years I have been slowly spiraling down into a personal hell, there is no doubt within one year I will be dead if something doesnt change but every time I run out I go through unimaginable sorrow and about 2 weeks ago I cut my wrist so deep it has scarred and I am humiliated by it, but it was the first real attempt to take my life, and im afraid after some more time I will either destroy my life or die... I know 4chan is the last place I should look but im sitting here so distraught I thought I would give it a try...