What's the most outrageous or offensive thing you've

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>>137617985
>I didn't even know a fruit could become a vegetables till now
Damn that's a good one!

>driving with family
>radio ad comes on
>ad says "There's something threatening America"
>blurt out "Niggers"

>>137617985
Holy shit I'm dyin

>>137617985
If i say something offensive or outrageus, then it's intentional, but i remember somewhat funny situation from school.
>be me in 4th grade in school with in-depth study of german language
>germans arrive in our school
>they visiting my class
>i drew swastikas all over my hand, because i'm retarded
>some bitch, which were sitting with me, told about this outloud
>whole class is laughing, some guy start doing roman salute
>germans are confused
>my teacher is embarassed, she told both us to get out
>happily returned home
The whole thing was hushed up, but my teacher hated me ever since, but i didn't care, because the next year there was new class teacher.

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I refused to date a single mom.

Last summer my parents and I were visiting my grandparents for an annual festival. It's a small town and everyone knows each other and gets along. I'm single and in my 20's. I earned an education and now I have some money in my pocket and I'm on a pretty good career path. I'm a pretty good catch. My grandparents' friend came over to say hello. The house was full of people hugging and laughing and getting reacquainted. My grandparents' friend has a daughter who happens to be a single mom. I know this because family is always a big topic of conversation at these gatherings. We're all very wholesome. Or used to be. At least we put on a good charade.

Long story short, at some point the mother of the single mom jokes that I'd really like her daughter. We all laugh about it and I play embarrassed like a good boy. But a while later she says that "No, really" I think you'd like my daughter. I politely declined and when asked by my own parents what else I had going on that afternoon, I politely responded that I believed her single-mom daughter had better places to be than hanging out with me.

My grandparents' living room temporarily turned into the opening scene of Saving Private Ryan. It became a "How dare you!" moment and vibe from everyone...except my grandparents. MeMe gave me a wink and later on after most people had left she and PopPop told me that I was right. That they thought I could do better and we had a very brief chat about how things had changed socially...and not always for the better.

>>137617985
Funny joke but vegetables are any edible part of a plant, fruit included. All fruits are vegetables but not all vegetables are fruits.

>>137622646
>MeMe
>PopPop

u wot m8

>>137617985
Funny, but never happened.

>>137623204
In many parts of the US, especially in my family, it's customary for the first grandchild to name the grandparents. My grandmother is affectionately called "MeMe" (MeeMee) and grandfather is called "PopPop."

I once accidently referred to Obama as Obongo among coworkers. I got some odd looks, but aside from that I usually manage to keep my edginess to myself.

Good thread.

>>137623131
shut up faggot.
"vegetables" includes the VEGETATIVE parts of the plant, "fruits" refers to the reproductive bodies

the joke was elegant, clever and 100% botanically correct

youre a cunt

>>137623481
Interesting. I was sitting with some coworkers in front of our office tv which is always switched to the news. There was something very brief about South Africa around the time Mandela died but I mumbled something like, "Yeah. It's a shame about them." I got a few looks too and I played it cool by saying, "Yeah, that country has some major challenges ahead" and everyone seemed to shrug. I think they were more comfortable with a bit of ambiguity rather than asking me to elaborate.

>>>Work in liberal environment
>>>Sitting at round table meeting late Nov 16
>>>Discussing new change in policy
>>>Boss tells me to send a memo to fellow coworkers telling them about the change, but not reason for change
>>>I say, "but that would be dishonest"
>>>Dead awkward uncomfortable silence
>>>People shift uncomfortably, eyes in laps
>>>Boss says, "What did you say?!?"
>>>I repeat, "that would be dishonest to not tell everyone the reason for the policy change"
>>>Dead awkward uncomfortable silence
>>>People still staring at laps
>>>My eyes meet boss man's in a steady gaze
>>>He looks away and says, "okay well draft a memo then that you think will work and I will review it"
>>>Heads pop up out of laps simultaneously with nods and smiles of support
>>>I breathe for the first time in 3 minutes

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>>137626681
Well done. Your boss didn't sense fear. Had he sensed fear then he would have been angry. Instead, because you remained calm and mellow, he took it as a practical and pragmatic suggestion.