/CPD/ CHICAGO PD SCANNER GENERAL - SATURDAY NIGHT EDITION

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And a very good evening to you Robert! Let the /comfy/ begin...

>8 car pileup on the Dan Ryan
>debris all over the road

Good evening, Robert. Second time on this thread. I got my drink and I'm ready.

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>first body removal of the night

Yoo early in boys

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>SIX
>SIX SHOTS FIRED
>AH AH AH

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in for Robert

Why should I care about CoonCago?

Parents raised me right the first time. I didn't seek to live in a ghetto-infested coontown. Just cuz your ass did...wtf, not my problem. niggers are YOUR problem chap

>>135472162
Listen to the CPD feed and get /comfy/ Robert.

>ten male blacks burning a blanket on the sidewalk and selling items

nothing interesting going on now, last night was much better in my opinion

>>135472457
The night is still young.

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>caller was carjacked and beaten
>call dropped
>no response on three callbacks

Fucking niggers. That being said I keep calling the non-emergency line for loitering and noisy niggers and cops never show up.

Did they just say 2 female jewbies?

What do you think the Laundromat fight is about?

>not separating whites from colors

why does every male white have a backpack?

>20 bangers running west on 21st

>missing 11 year old son
>he's gone missing before

>tell security to do their job

Are we on zone6 or dispatch

>>135475691
dispatch, zone 6 appears offline

Time for REAL ROBERT HOURS

>>135475691
Dispatch.

>>135475875
Thank you.

>missing ten year old

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>>135475880
Adam always fucks up his keys.

>two brothers calling say the other is mentally ill and having problems, one is drinking.

mang this nigga be crazy, he all actin wack n shit

>people at Mexican canteen

>anon demands the car be towed

> 3-4 people fighting in McDonald lobby

Evening Roberts! How is the weekend madness going?

>Guy in McDonald's parking lot causing trouble

>>135476901
>>135477196
There's been an amazing amount of coonery at McDonalds this week.

>black acura with head light out, has guns in it.

>>135477329
As someone who works at McDonald's (not in Chicago) I can back this up. McDonald's is a universal attractor of coonery around closing/late night hours.

bump

Is CPD dead tonight? It sounds like sassy is working

>>135478462
It's a slow night so far.

>>135478462
Pretty dead. Mostly just general coonery tonight. Nothing big from what I've been hearing.

>>135478562
>>135478514
That's a pretty good thing. I really think ima go read a book and enjoy the /calm/

>>135478694

Read while listening to Robert?

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found sassy

>trying to run over female black

>>135470259
Man that OP picture is fuggin A E S T H E T I C

>two males fighting
>one has a rod in hand

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>7 shots fired
AH AH AH

>being choked and punched by a male black with a stroller

>victim on scene
F?

>4 people arguing and threatening each other

>EMS call in front of wallgreens
lol, but the medicine is right t h e r e

>his head is split open

F

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>>135480466

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>>135479843
>medicine is right t h e r e
kek

Also, anyone got an interesting events or stories? I remember seeing something about the same gas station being robbed twice the same night.

>Threatening to shoot the next random person walking pass the caller unless ( ? ) arrives.

good evening roberts, looks like its been a bit more interesting than usual tonight despite a slow start!

>>135480788
Hmm, I'd have to do some archive diving, because some nights are more active than others; but I'm sure there are a few different stories that could be shared!

>>135480858
BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM (you know you want it)
BANG BANG ALL OVER YOUUU (i'll let you have it)

>person in the water at Navy Pier

>>135479111
>>135479144
>>135480466
>>135480788
>>135481222
>>135481277
>checked
>increase in /comfy/ detected

>Waleed Hameed

>homeless male causing disturbance, yelling

>group of kids running in and out of traffic

>disgruntled old woman going off to yell at taken care off roof top party
>group of kids running in and out of traffic
It's only fun till someone >F

>firework

>another noise complaint
What is it with all the loud block parties tonight?

>>135481843
It is a Saturday night

Can I get a quick rundown on which days are prime Robert hours? Is it only friday, or is all of the weekend pretty lit

>heard what sounds like 20 gunshots

>>135482027
Every evening from 10 P.M. to 6 A.M.

Does anyone decode the morse code that's broadcasted? Or what's the occasionally morse code like sounds

>>135482027
Usually summer weekends are busiest, it's just for some reason it's really dead tonight. Might get interesting closer to midnight or 1am.

>shots fired confirmed
>Male shot in the house

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made it home safe to Indiana from the Sox game.

God bless you Robert.

>>135482426
The fuck happened there?
Looked like they tried to stop some violent drunk dude before the cops killed him.

>>135482677
Just nigs niggin'.

>I need an amberlamps for a 21 year old female, intoxicated

>male masturbating by the bridge

>man masturbating by bridge
But why?

>>135482757
They look Asian, but the I guess the same rule applies here.
>>135483093
Why not?

>>135482426
>>135482677
>>135482757
Holy shit, stupid fucking kid. This sums up Chicago is shit. The new normal for like 10 years there

>>135483093
There is no place in this city that male black won't jerk off.

>>135483123
>>135483238
Maybe it's because I don't understand male masturbation habits, or maybe it's because I'm a prude; but why would anyone masturbate in public, especially by a bridge?

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>>135483376
drugs are a helluva drug

>>135483376
Because niggers.

>>135483376
When you're drunk enough you'll do anything.

>>135483376

There are bridge trolls that feed on semen. It's called a toll road.

>>135483376
>why would anyone masturbate in public, especially by a bridge?

when you live under the bridge...

also homeless or mentally ill

We do not copy any of your transmission ROBERT

Fuck man semiautos

Is it usually this quiet on a Saturday night or is it still a bit early?

I would imagine the gangs should be out killing each other in their sleep. At least I would.

>Death Investigation.
>Animal Bite.

>>135484739
>>135484739
toddler mauled to death by pitbull

>>135485171
The dog breed of peace strikes again

Hello Roberts

>attempting suicide at the red line

>Man forcing woman in to a vehicle.
Barely any description was given.

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>>135470831

Relatively newfag here. Could somebody give me concise definition of /comfy/

>>135484739
>>135485171
>>135485232
Fucking horrible RIP

>Intoxicated Male or Hit by a Taxi Male.

>>135485378
Something familiar, and comforting. Do it for a while, it'll feel comfy.

>>135485378
Sit back, relax, chat, and listen while Chicago burns itself to the ground.

>male fell down a manhole

Storm drain nog's going to get him.

>14 year old got beaten by three adults after throwing a bottle at them

>Teen throws bottle at a group of people.
>3 Adult Males jumping a Teenager

http://i4.ytimg.com/vi/kdOPBP9vuZA/mqdefault.jpg

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Throw shit, get hit

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Are the female officers in Chicago as bad as they are in San Antonio?

>>135487093
Tell me that's not real

>>135487396
I've literally seen a female sheriff's deputy put the mag into her rifle backwards.

>>135487396
>Plastic bag filled with bullets.
Fake

>>135487532
I've seen people do that at gun ranges multiple times.

>armed with a bat
>wearing a batman shirt

>>135488000
>>135488004
>the hero Chiraq needs but doesn't deserve

>>135482426
Why does the black chick at the bottom right of the video have a go pro on her head? Anyone have the video from her perspective?

>drunk male fell off his bike
>now he's bleeding

>>135482247
That's just the repeater sending its call sign. FCC rules.

>female screaming for help under the Addison underpass

Newfag here. This IS cozy as fuck. I can't tell if the "who is Robert" in the sticky is sarcastic or not.

Is all this talking to one guy named Robert? Cunfused.

>>135474019
everyone has a backpack here because almost no one drives. Take mine everywhere because never know when you'll need to carry some shit back home.

>>135489539
Callsign for night shift patrol cars.

>>135489649
Cheers, that's hilarious.

10 shots fired

>>135489880
10 SHOTS OH SHIT

Male white hispanic?

>male black threw a bottle through the window of the women's shelter

>cops aren't being let into gated community

Bump

Every so often, i hear laughing in the background in dispatch

>>135490303
Yeah, heard that earlier.

First time listening, this is better than TV.

Sleep tight Robert

>now the uncle has a knife to the aunt's throat in the alley

I missed the body removal explanation. What just happened?

>body removal
>320 pound corpse

>>135490802
320 pound dead male black needs to be hauled off.

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>>135483093
>>135483238
>>135483376
>>135483453
>>135483550
>>135483619
>>135483688
>Implying you wouldn't a bridge

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>TEN
>TEN SHOTS FIRED
>AH AH AH

>bullets coming through the trees

>8 year old bit by the pit bull
>refusing to take him to the hospital

>20 year old female stabbed in the head

F

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Evening Roberts, how's it been tonight?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYOtZvwNCsc

>10 Gang bangers chimping out.
>Male Black with a Belt not allowing customers out of the store.

>throwing bottles
>gangbangers on the corner yelling cop killers

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>4 Shots Fired while yelling, "Cop Killers"!

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>>135492442
Slow for a Saturday however the activity never ends.

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>>135486146
F

>>135486146
>>135493906

Why is someone going home being reported?

>someone set the store on fire

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>>135494258
heh heh

>male spic dragging a female spic

>8 shots fired

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>>135495230
Two newly weds. Husband is taking bride home.

>>135495230
The courtship rituals of the human bean begin anew

>caller's 35 year old has died

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>refusing to do CPR over the phone

>car vs pole
>occupants of the car are injured

>>135495892
pole wins again

>>135495892
You'd be surprised how secure those poles are in the ground.

>they boyfriend threatened to kill himself
>he's tried before
>call dropped

F

>he's hysterical
>saying someone stabbed him and he's bleeding and he doesn't want to die

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>>135496981
F

>>135496981
F

>major accident
>victim is DOA

Is it normally this average? Seems like a typical Saturday night for most cities.

>>135493906

huh, I used to bike down that road.

Now I'll never be able to relax while doing so again

>>135497423
This is a pretty slow night.

>>135477329

One time I took the red line all the way south. I got off and went to the closest McDonalds. Overheard some kid (probably about 16 years old) bragging to a girl on the phone about how his friend just got shot.

Chicago just needs a reset button.

>you just jinxed yourself, you realize that don't you

>>135497741

Also on that journey, I walked to a walmart. Weird shit started happening. A walmart worker just came up to me and started talking to me like he knew me for years.

As I walked out the store, a car slowly came to the stop in the middle of a side road, as if to make a turn. I thought this was odd, so I stopped to observe as well.

Then the car started to turn, and crashed straight into a fence at about 10 miles per hour.

I started walking back to the red line at that point.

>this guys on the list
crabby knows her zoo

>female black just shot a .22 into the air

>female black just shot into the air with a .22

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>>135497741
You mean a nuke?

>>135488143
thats not a go pro thats her hair

>Red Jeep just puled up to Stroger with a gunshot victim
>looks like he got it in the mouth

Crabby counts victims

>intoxicated females on caller's porch
>intoxicated male asleep on the caller's couch
>caller's not sure how they got in

>about 50 people fighting in the street on S. Damon

>50 people fighting in the street
>threatening suicide

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>50 people fighting in the street
wew

>>135498824

"there's no reason you would ever need an automatic rifle with a large clip"

>you've spent your whole career jinxing yourself

inappropriate

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>>135490925
And Trump's Chicago tower too, it's me time.

>2 people fighting at the Dunkin Donuts

"you've been spending your whole career fixing yourself".... Did dispatch just say that to Robert who asked about the suicide threat and was gonna head over there even though another Robert was headed that way? Let's send our best Robert, folks. JFC, the guy talking the other guy off the ledge is better at it if he's been on the ledge himself. God bless that second Robert.

>>135499043
da fuq?

Man... This one bitch in dispatch has given out all the fucks she has already... Fucking hilarious.

>there's only 1 truck working for the whole city so they'll get there when they get there

the government should take care of everyth-

>>135499223

sultry probably needs a cig break by now

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>male shot lower part of the body

junk shot?

>>135499311
...and it's a hot night in Chi-raq tonight, right? She sounds like she already had a shot of whiskey.

>>135499359
just fuck my bloodline up Jamal

>multiple shooting scenes
>deceased on Roosevelt
F
dispatch trying to keep up

>hear gunshots or fireworks
>5 minutes later
>ambulance drives by apartment

lol it was probably gunshots. were any gunshots called in recently

holy fucking check your keys

>>135499643
Lots of them.

>>135499695
Just as I pull my blanket up and get comfy, tryna doze off to Robert saving the world... $4'ckekdmdjskieiwdifjcjvjorekj83$:$/-'sm

>>135499718
anything in pilsen/south of pilsen?

Just got here. Can anyone give me tonight's highlights so far?

>there's a person shot and I can leave my partner here

>>135499794
>>135499695

that was pretty extreme indeed. was the worst i've heard. i wonder if they were able to cut that off from HQ or if it just stopped on its own

>>135499827

>>135498760
>>135498294
>>135498123
>>135497280
>>135496981
>>135494347
>>135492471
>>135492101
>>135491676
>>135488004
>>135486865
>>135483070

>>135490802

Diebeetus

>>135499818

just heard that a group of people are fighting on the 1300 block of loomis (which i believe is north pilsen). nothing further

>10-11 shots fired

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7200 S Hulman, 10-11 shots fired

fucking aliens

>>135501065
>>135501141
Let's be optimistic.
11

wa wa wa wa wa wa wa

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>>135501206
nogs getting beamed up

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What a slow night..

>>135504096

And now day. Will he send in the troops?