/CPD/ CHICAGO PD SCANNER THREAD - EARLY ROBERTS HOURS EDITIO

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Checking the keys, over.

ayy

Any other locals? 016/45th Ward here.

>>134820909
Aah these breads always help me sleep.

Evening, Roberts.

Did I just hear "mother fucker"?

>drunk manlet damaging property

>beaners fighting with sticks and chains

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>spend my day off watching youtube and cleaning.
>realize that I was just waiting for someone to make a /cpd/.
I don't understand why this is so fun and enjoyable. I'm pretty sure the regulars here are the same.

>man directing people where to get drugs
>two hispanic women, possibly mother and daughter fighting in the front.

>man passed out not breathing infront of salvation army
>doing CPR, fire rolling
F

>two ex-roomates tried to break in to apartment.
>shots fires, 6 to 8 male blacks running away.

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>>134820909

Have a bump, Adams and Roberts.

>8 male whites fighting using bike locks as weapons
Fucking antifa?!

A REAL HUMAN BEING
AND A REAL HERO

/CPD/ meetup report (the parts I can remember):
>kicked out and denied entry to about 4 bars for being too drunk
>bullied a group of hipsters
>NAP violation that got my face busted by Robert
Absolutelydegenerate/10, would do again.

>possible heroin overdose

>33yo male, possible heroin OD

>flashia ortiz has been missing for two weeks, her husband has been saying "she's not home". Flashia is known to abuse drugs. Calls to the house and her husband got voice mail

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>Mr. Ortiz says Mrs. Ortiz is not available

>>134827989

They're probably spics or Poles.

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>>134828891

Please elaborate.

>callers baby daddy is drinking, stole her house and car keys and kicked her out of the car. He has a charge for destroying his neighbors stuff

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Keys checked for /comfy/ time

>gas leak in a building people are squatting in
place bets on if someone smokes now.

>>134830364
yo' can i get a light

>he reached into someone's car and they hit him in the head

Sounds like the problem solved itself

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Homeless BTFO

>male black laying on sidewalk with pillow

>male black laying on the sidewalk with a pillow

he just tryin' to get /comfy/

>male blacks dancing in front of 7-11 and taking their clothes off

>male blacks dancing to loud music on their cell phone and taking their clothes off infront of a store. The store is afraid they are going to rob the place.

Robbed by a naked nog....

>male black 26,yo high risk refusing to leae with amber lamps.

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>TWENTY FIVE TO THIRTY
>TWENTY FIVE TO THIRTY SHOTS FIRED
>AH AH AH

>>134831637
The gun laws have to work if you believe hard enough!

>the mother smoked leaf and threatened to stab him in hit him with a bat
>caller is 13

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>13 yo shino- tory said his mother smoked "leaf" and said she'd stab him and beat him with a bat.
Parenting....you're doing it wrong

>house on fire.

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Happy Monday Roberts... may the comfy be with you...

>>134828891
wtf? we had a meet up?

>there's a lot of lines on fire

>>134831637
>>134831756

HOLY SHIT! CHIRAQ is so shit

>one DOA
>one in guarded condition
>stable is not a condition REEEEEEE

The hell is this guarded condition nonsense?

>>134832413
You're new to this kinda thing huh? This is actually a pretty mellow night so far.

>>134832561
They are basically watching them.

>multiple granges on fire now

>the offender now has a knife and is threatening to stab the mother who was threatening to hit him with a metal bat

>>134831895
>>134831945
The kid now has a knife is and trying to stab mom now(?) I missed the end.

>30-40 people at a candle light vigil

we cannot share a landmass with these animals

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>>134832700

another innocent refrigerator taken too soon

>asian woman in her 30's or 40's beating on the side of a car infront of a subway

lol why does the new dispatch sound absolutely wasted?

>>134833117
with a katana

>crazy asian female beating a Nissan

R A R E

>>134833170
Never piss off your not asian wife?

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God I love /cpd/! As a Midwesterner, its really comfy to know that Robert is on patrol in Chiraq

Im high

>parent got text message that her daughter is suicidal over school grades
: (

Keys need to be checked

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>>134833434
fucking degenerate way to be suicidal imho

>>134830713
You'd be amazed. Years ago when I was living in East Rogers Park I had a guy trying to jump my back gate at 2am. He'd made a hell of a racket moving garbage cans around to get high enough, so I went out, found him halfway over, and pushed him on back to the alley.

Fucker called the cops and wanted to press assault charges. CPD, dolls that they are, decided to decline both his complaint and mine for residential burglary.

>>134833434
asians are taking up a lot of airtime tonight

>>134833828

Was it a nog? That takes some balls to try to rob someone and then say they assaulted you when to pushed you off of their fence you were trying to climb. You could have probably shot him and gotten away with it.

>>134834098
Last night we had a /native American/ with tribal tattoos stabbing male black. It was U B E R - R A R E

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>shift change

so glad I joined the force ~~~

>can you get on northbound lane and drive south
>normally yeah i could but there'd be north bound traffic coming right at me.

>>134834683
>native american
>tribal tattoos
>not realizing MS-13 gang members are native americans with tribal tattoos

>>134834663
This was back during the bad old days of the handgun ban, popping him would have been a very bad move if it wasn't absolutely necessary.

Interestingly, he was white. The building was this big courtyard building and we had a new tenant. We found out later that she was turning tricks out of the unit. He had been her pimp before she went and set up shop for herself, and I guess he was breaking in to try to talk to her or scare her or whatever. We ended up having to evict her before the year was up.

He actually showed up again six months later or so, right after we evicted the girl, and took a bad beating from two other tenants. He was trying to break in and then started making threats. Turns out the woman he threatened was the wife of this crazy 50-something Greek bricklayer who lived in one of the basement apartments. Greek psycho had another tenant over for beers, a black guy who lived in the building with his kids and was none too impressed with a pimp sneaking around. I almost felt sorry for the guy.

>RACIAL SLURS !!!

Weekend's Shoot-O-Rahm-A
2017: 7 killed,38 wounded
2016: 6 killed, 42 wounded
2015: 7 killed,34 wounded
is there a point system so we can twll if it's getting worse each year?

>bank holdup alarm

>bank hold up alarm

>two people shot

Kyle you'll make it bro

>one year old neighbor keeps harassing her

>>134829914
The NAP violation was just me being a drunk dick, I hit him in the face for no reason and he came back and got a good one right in my nose. We're cool though, we hugged it out and I sucked his dick. With the hipsters, I don't even know what happened, I looked over and hear him saying "yeah, but I'm gay so I can call you a faggot" and we just kept escalating it until they left.

>>134832126
Yup, where you stay at boi?

Is this the dedicated NEET thread?

>caherine crown, 51 yo male, 5'5' 120lbs dead in location
Dead tranny?

>>134837939
Sounds like it. One hell of a manlet too.

>>134837916
you misspelled /comfy/

>>134837713

I don't think that's possible

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>>134833431
well circle cut my bacon

>>134838540
Seems to be popular with these threads. I myself have just discovered the joy of vodka on the rocks tonight.

>EMS responded to a female having a seizure
>now there's a group fighting on the scene

>ems call for woman having a seizure, a group of people now fighting EMS

>>134838662
i was just playin. this is the /comfy/ place after all

>a man just bodyslammed caller

>Female white in blue tank top running and yelling about being sexually assaulted.
Bad jog?

>male blacks with ski masks climbed in the window and are now walking
>white woman with black leggings and blue shirt is yelling someone just sexually assaulted her
>.....wow
>dispatch "im going to save my reply for a latter time"

>shots fired

>body removal at hospital ER. edward sanidall, male black 58 yo.

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>body removal in the ER

>request for a body removal by a hospital's ER (male black), nothing unusual for removal service

>ANOTHER order for body removal

>SUVs with whites, hispanics, white hispanics, or hispanic whites, one shooting at the other

>>134820909
>11-52 Funeral detail
At this time?

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Happy birthday, Officer Ramirez! Cake time!

>it's officer meriez's birthday he's 21.
Happy Birthday Robert, have a beer.

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>>134823044
>>134827600
>>134829922
>>134830755
>>134832700
>>134833399
>>134835022
>>134835022
>>134836155
>>134837265
>>134839700
The numbers from 97 posts in /cpd/......

>>134840704
>65
my favorite double

>>134840812
Fuck off, my keys were stuck.

>>134840922
gotta check dem keys

>>134840922
Witnessed.

>burglary in basement, had already happened on Saturday too

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CAKE TIEM!

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>store
>meat dept.
>having some kind of hallucination

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>male in the back of the store by the meat department having a hallucination

>GSW in both legs, stable condition.

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>officers checked party, no loud ruckus.

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>>134828891

We're lucky we didn't get arrested.

>male white with large black coat yelling
Treach coat mafia?

>another body removal

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>yet another body removal waiting to be called in.

>>134841824
Yeah, we should probably keep it a bit more chill next time:

>>134840704
The dubz are rich in this bitch!

>>134842218
Fuck that, you should go sing karaoke at the Hidden Cove once the normal bars close.

> ET needed for sexual assault on 14 year old in hospital, Danella preriz
>mother is with her

Good morning Roberts! Last night's thread was badass! Too bad I can't stay long tonight.

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I'm really digging this color mix. /cpd/ has a lot of awesome purple and blue OC, but it's cool to see something different. At this point the Regulars have everything so it's all for the new people.

>>134843083
Approved. It looks post-apocalyptic which is fitting.

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>1900's Chicago
>10 shots fired.

>10 shots fired

>>134843003
i enjoyed it very much as well. some good side conversations as well

Lots of people in the hospital tonight.

>taken a bottle of pills.
>usually over the counter.
>attention seeking.

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>>134843618
I agree with the talks. Whoever it was had a good point about this being "true reality". I was with family and saw they have a "cops live" TV show. It was boring as fuck and they cut away once things got "edgy". /cpd/ is realistic as it gets for better or worse.

>man took a bottle of pills.
what kind of pills? knowing would be nice...

>serious condition
>something about cyanide?
well best of luck dude.

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>male black shooting bottle rockets at male white on bike
Tale as old as time

>>134843355
lel

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>GSW to torso, stable condi.
>im sorry, what condiction? good, fair, serious, etc
>oh, serious
>well get someone over there when we can, we're backloged
Based dispatch understands.

>>134844192
pic related. Even a super hero like Robert needs the angels for help now and then. The doctors and nurses and a special breed of angelic birdie.

evening roberts, any update on that fbi agent's stolen m4?

>>134844806
Its gone.

>Carlene 16yo girl missing

>she is 5'5", 190 lbs.
That is a fat bitch

Just tuning in. Anything happen tonight?

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>>134845074

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>>134844434
Don't worry. They can't hit shit anyway. Pic related.

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>>134845322
....I feel as if I've seen unpure things and should repent.

>Male white at a bar, intoxicated, arguing with staff, wants to fight other patrons

>>134845322
Is she the one in the video who was naked grabbing any vehicle that passed? I don't want to see that ever again!

>the husband's girlfriend walked up to the loft with a knife

>Someone trying to damage cameras outside CSV

>husbands girlfriend in the loft (?)

>>134845563
I'm on my way to the bathroom to get some eye bleach Roger now.

>>134845783
*CVS

>>134845322
Is that footage from a zoo?

>>134845563

sox fan? the game today was glorious.

the crosstown night games being on the southside this year might cause some extra work for robert. obviously MALE BLACK cares not about baseball, but all the literal faggot cubs fans(especially the november 2016 lifelongs) will probably wander more than 3 blocks from the field and will be prime targets

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>>134845992
>gaika wallace
the. names.

>stabbed with scissors
Well that's new. And on her neck as well? Kinda impressive actually.

>dead beaner

This a corpsey night.

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>>134846133
check the digits haha

>>134846223
That's not going to end very well.

>>134846318
Damn, tonight is pretty deadly

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Pro tip: A full moon really is when the shit hits the fan.

> t. medical

>fat middle eastern male says he's going to kill himself at montrose harbor

>middle eastern male saying he would commit suicide at the harbor
O_O

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mudskin wants to kill himself.

god bless.

>>134847098
bummer

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>>134836461
Heyjackass

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>>134847007

>roommate is drunk and using drugs, locked her out.

>Girl takes drugs and gets drunk, has a guy with a gun over, locks out her roommate.
Why I stay in my own place.

>radio 0474
>backround sounds
CHECK YOUR FUCKING KEYS

>>134847183
oh gawd kaner

>found the attempted suicide arab (?)

>>134847323
i can't tell whats going on there, do i want to know?

Someones having a bit of a domestic

>>134847323
Surgeon? You flatter me! I would describe my job duties as Rectal Sanitation Engineer.

>>134848148
Nope. Far from a Doctor. My job duties are: dealing with middle management anger, dealing with customer/client abuse, Sometimes actually working. Being a doctor would be a cool gig in life. I wonder how much stuff they have to give a doctor to want to stay in Chicago

What kids play basketball and take drugs this late at night in Chicago on a school night?

>black male threatening to burn the building down

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>problems with sons friend. Saying he will burn the building down and refusing leave

>Sex in black Hyundai in no-parking zone
>kek 10-4

>>134848510
implying niggers give a shit about school

>>134848357
>sounds exactly like my place
We are brothers in feces!
>Chicago doctor's pay?
Not enough.

>drunk man about drink and drive with two dogs in the car
Robert save the doggahs!

>two people having sex in a black hundai, parked in a no parking zone

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>>134848761
Institutionalized oppression

>>134848790
And now two people having sex in a silver sedan

ROBERTS CHECK YOUR KEYS

Not sure if you're joking. But you do know what Robert means right?

>>134848777
Damn, them digits....first trips of the night. I'm trying to get out of my situation in life. I cut my life style back and started saving for a house in a rural farm area. It's worth it to suffer for a few years to leave the city.

>2 male blacks breaking in to a furniture store.

>male black just walked in and jumped the clerk at 7-11

>powertools
>1am
>disturbance
.... ok, I guess I can see it.

>>134849192
You're on the right path. Rural life is worth the sacrifice. Good luck!

>>134849308

that africa colored rug with a big marijuana leaf on it is as good as gone

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>>134849659
10-4 Robert, thank you.
>>134849741
hahahahaha

>Spray painting dock area off the bridge

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>threatens to burn down building
>refuses to leave building
>tfw actually Indian Monk

>house with all the doors open
This does not sound good.

>her radio is fucked to all hell

>having sex in black Hyundai
>Robert chuckles
I can relate Robert, I can relate

>Dr. Kwak
Quack, perfect!

>>134850254
You are lagging behind the feed, refresh the page.

>You guys are walking on each other
Handling same incident?

>disturbance at trump tower

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>trump tower

>>134850947
>>134851000
Oh no....the trump curse is about to hit chiraq. Mr president, please give Robert the money he needs to fight male black

>you can't tell me but I just got here
Sass

>The offender is threatening to throw his mother (?) out.

>male beaners stripping a vehicle

>>134850947
>>134851000
>>134851126
Probably Greenpeace again.

>>134851219
>throw her out of the window

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>>134850619

>tfw when you know you're better armed than MALE BLACK.

now if only gay-ass illinois would reciprocate my permit

>>134851325
Cap, what kinda mazda you drive?

Mazda 3 masterrace here (6 speed patrician)

>Daughter's boyfriend refusing to leave
Fight with the baby momma?

>>134851325
>>134851597
and I EDC a CZ- P07

>>134851597

cx5, decent storage capacity and good mpg

Goodnight Roberts. Stay safe out there.

>>134852092
G'night Robert.

>homicide

>two light poles down
>glass all over the street

>>134853786
10$ it's a nig

>>134857931
it always is

>>134858893
Sometimes it's a beaner.

These threads really belong on reddit

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>>134860706
That's where you're wrong, donkeynigger. Get /comfy/ or go back to facebook.

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>>134851325
Shit I wouldn't go into chimpcago with anything less than .308. Pic related. Cut down version would be better for Male Black type of work.