/CPD/ CHICAGO POLICE SCANNER GENERAL – 45 min. till Robert's

>30 people fighting in the street

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1 hour 40 minutes till REAL ROBERT HOURS

>Homeless man in the middle of the street
F

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Over under on shot/wounded?

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Let's get it on ock and watch the spot get blown

>>132415665
So close

>>132415722
Checked, a Robert work of art

Place your bets on how many firework-related incidents there will be tonight.

>>132415722
>OP here
my fault. I suffer from EST efficiency syndrome.

>>132415832
at least two dozen

>>132415832
I'll go with 34

>>132415722
July 4th is Real Robert Day/Night

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How'd I do, guys?

>>132415837
Ohhhh shit I didn't even see tht you put it in the OP, I wasn't trying to correct you kek, but yeah it fucks me up too cause use to everything being EST so the fact tht they're 1 hour behind always fucks with me

>>132415832

Like injuries or being used as bombs/thrown at people? At least 50.

Just actual calls about fireworks has to be in the 100s.

>mom found 14 y/o son's drug stash

>>132415955
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VrDfSZ_6f4U

>mom found a lot of drugs under her sons bed.

>>132415966
>bud light

Why anon.

>She called the cops
Kek, I'd be pissed

FUKKIN AMERICA BABY

>fuckin America baby
>love it or leave it

>fuckin America, baby.

>love it or leave it

>>132415966
didn't die/10

>>132415966
your a fuckup, dont buy mint get NATURAL

>>132416038
whatever. we'll get it right next time.

>>132415426
>Fucking America baby
>love it or leave it
did I just hear that?

>Welcome to America, baby.
>Love it or leave it.

My, Robert, that's rather unprofessional. Check yo keys.

>>132416133

It's Bud heavy. Came in a 15 pack. July 4th. Look at the price, anon.

America baby love it or leave it

>>132416195
Heard it

>>132416195
i wouldn't doubt it.
Robert based like that.

>Fucking America Baby
>Love it or Leave it
>Or love it so much you protect it

Just got back from walking the dog. How many gunshots and fires in the last half hour?

>>132416169

>15 budweisers
>die

How?

>>132416176

They don't have straight at this store or I would.

>>132416319
30 person street brawl, about 3 shooting incidents, multiple fires,

as i type this another shooting and a daughter having a siezure

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starting my bingo 1.5hrs before rr hours.

>drinking and urinating in the alley

>>132416160
>>132416163
>>132416168
>>132416195
I JUST got here and missed that

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>>132416176
You mean get general

>>132416109
Requesting confirmation to make this thread theme. Additional recommendations will be considered.

>urinating off broadway
that's when you know you've hit a low in your career

never tuned into these, missed first thread ages ago and never knew where to start.

Who is robert?

>>132415966
checked 66 and 17.76 10/10 anon

>>132415966
Why didn't you get any fresh made sandwiches?

Grizzly Mint? I quit Copenhagen Jan 2, I still miss it. You should find a better dip anon

>>132416517
ROBERT is the hero Chiraq needs but doesn't deserve; His nemesis is MALE BLACK, a notorious thief, murderer, and general rapscallion. By night they battle for the fate of the city.

>>132416517
Robert is the night shift

shots fired w. 40th st.

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>>132416227
I see what youre saying robert, disreguard previous call. Here, have an anons imagining of Crabby.

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>>132416517
welcome to the end of western civilization Robert

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>>132416517
Get /comfy/

>>132416587

Chiraq = chicago and iraq?

>>132416517

Chicago police on night duty, starting at 10 pm Chicago time, 11 pm EST. They're referred to using a number with "Robert" at the end.

>>132416662
Yes, because it's a war zone

>>132416466
were more of them re-posted? I posted 9 cards in the first thread this afternoon that were from last night.

>check your keys check your partners keys check your dog's keys
>CHECK YOUR KEYS

>intoxicated female just walked into his house, he told her to leave now she's sitting on his porch

pheromones?

>>132416584

Grizz straight is my goto since college, can't change now.

>>132416517
remember to always check yo keys.

>>132416517
A real american hero anon. Some say he was the first ever nigger wrangler and he's come to Chiraq in their darkiest hour to save them

heyjackass just updated, 5 shot, one dead today, guess we have to wait for the sun to go down for the bloodbath to start

drunk bitch walked into his house. now won't leave his front porch. tfw you will never have drunken pussy magically appear in your living room. why live

>>132415966
Heresy! Camel menthol and Icehouse next time.

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>>132416662
yep

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Can't think of a better way to spend my 4th

>someone with a machete

>male cut up the caller with a machete

Literally Africa.

>>132415966
Still cant understand why in the USA prices aren't listed with the tax. It makes it much easier when you dont need to calculate another % on top of the listed price

>>132416662
People familiar with the gangster culture and high rate of violent crime in Chicago, particularly on the south side of the city (majority black population) and large parts of the west side of the city (majority spics) refer to Chicago as a whole as Iraq as one is more likely to be shot and killed there than Iraq. Nigga

>Machete

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Hot damn, how is everyone tonight?

It's the greatest time of year for the city of Chicago and it's like fucking Christmas in July for me.

anything wild happen yet? I just got off of work.

>>132416943
someone got stabbed by the machete. oh shit that's gonna leave a mess

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Time to get comfy, I've waited all year for the RRH to kick in on the 4th

Oh s*** we got the machete action going now

>Machete
Getting closer to bingo

>>132416790
saved

>>132417004
someone got stabbed with a fucking machete like 30 seconds ago

>>132416912
Your h2puse looks like it's gotta lotta junk anon, is this a spare room or are you in some bumfuck state like oklahoma...?

>>132416951
mainly because tax rates can vary from city to city. and they don't want you to know you can drive literally 15 minutes further and get it cheaper.

>>132417004
Machete attack just happened

Also there was a riot with a million people and all of them had guns

FRANK

>>132416954
*refer to Chicago as a whole as Chiraq...

>>132417004

Beer, Dip, /cpd/, America. Lets roll, Robert.

>>132416227
That's actually a damn good deal. Would be at least 15 in Taxachusetts

>>132416912
nice phone

>yoots

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>>132417110
>>132417077

how did he get through the no Machete zone?

>>132417110
(((YOUTHS))) loitering

We need a Discord or a synchtube or something

>>132416951
Xepends on state, oregon has no sales tax so what you see is what you get. But state tax is .09 percent with FICA its .17 percent from your income. Sometimes businesses add it in automatically like starfucks.

Wasted all that tea over .03...happy 4th britbong.

>>132417092
It's my living room, we're moving some rooms around rn so it's worse than normal, but my desk is always a mess like tht

>>132417228
use matrix.org

>someone threw an M80 down into Grand station

>SOMEONE THREW M80 INTO GRAND STATION

>>132417179

Booze prices seem pretty low in Chiraq. Seemed like it was more expensive when I lived in Ohio.

>>132417228
Get out

>two male blacks one male hispanic with guns sitting in a Hyundai Sonata

>>132417386
no

>>132417107
Makes sense. Must be difficult though for people without a lot of money trying to do a bit of shopping when they have to figure out how much they can actually spend for it to add up to what they have

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>>132417077
I'm honestly surprised there are not MORE machete stabbings. You can buy one from Walmart for like $12

This is the coziest time of the year. God please watch over Robert for us.

>>132417272
Damn summer cleaning, are you mad anon? Well hopes the move is quick and you should keep that phone on your desk if it works. Family must call you on that to enter your study.

>>132417448
yea it's a bitch that's for sure.

>neighbors have been lighting off firecrackers constantly for 2 hours
>air coming into my apartment is being filtered through my air conditioner
>it still smells like somebody set a powder magazine on fire

>>132417448
not really, there is no tax on "food" items, so what you see is what you get

SHOOTING OFF GUN IN SCHOOL PARKING LOT

>kids shooting off a gun in the school parking lot

>kids shooting off gun in the school parking lot.
*sigh*

some dyke shooting off their gun in a school parking lot

>kids shooting off a gun in the parking lot of a school

>>132417568
probably the most time they have ever spent at school

> JAMMING 80's classic over Robert
> cold beer
extra freedom /comfy/

>sex offense other
>elderly male white exposing himself

>elderly male white is exposing himself

what percent of the female officers has Robert banged?

>exposing himself

>elderly male white exposing himself
>believed to be a resident of a nursing home

>person shot
>multiple crime scenes

>>132417831
>>132417806
>>132417807
>>132417851
That one is definitely on the bingo board

>nursing home escapee is walking around exposing himself to children.

>one victim is dead
+1 to the score

BODY REMOVAL!
90 min or it's free!

waiting for the body snatchers again.

>>132417885
request bingo board for next bread
will shoop
>over

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>>132417889

>Ready for body removal

>WE GOT A FEMALE WITHA KNIFE AND SHE-

>static

Female with knife

And happy 4th CPD

>female with a knife

>female with a knife at austin and beech
>distressed sounding Robert
>glass breaking and female screaming for help in the basement

>>132417768
White power Robert, enjoy your freedoms to hate niggers. More over, value your ability to hold yourself to a higher standard.

>cop saying they had a woman with a knife *lots of yelling*

got a woman with a knife. sounded hectic.

another mariachi band

>we got a mariachi band and fireworks

A maraichi band AND Fireworks

>they got a mariachi band AND fireworks

Wew, Here. We. GO.

>They got a maricachi band AND fireworks...

>>132418000
whatcha want a template or a card? i have both

>>132418154
I'd like a card please

>>132418147
>
>>132418124
>>132418113
>>132418101
the guy sounded so jealous

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>>132416517
Here's your complimentary bingo sheet

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>>132418025

Were y'all serious?

>>132416768
no those are the ones i gave you last night. i just like to play more than one card. and its easier to half the screen with 4 in 1 image

>>132415754
14/88

>>132418000
there were like 9 cards but i lost them all, sorry

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>>132418218

>machete attack

ma-what attack?

>machete attack

>another machete attack.

Is the scanner really quiet (low) for you guys? They sound pretty far/whispering and my volume is 100%

>>132418343
Thankd

lmao the machete attack

>>132418344
>>132418345
>>132418347
>>132418351
again???

Machete wielding maniac on the loose

>>132418370
no

>machete attack

Winnipeg is really the Chicago of the north, that's our Canada Day tradition

>>132418400
add to bingo pls

>>132418242
Its probably his fans. My craptop spiked to ~66% when opening it.

>>132418400
There's been a noticeable increase in machete-related crimes in the last week.

>10 people outside fighting

>>132418370
someone needs to run a compressor/limiter on the feed so the quietest Roberts are louder

>>132415426
>what's your location?
>let you know when we get there

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>>132418347

>>132418380
here are 4 cards in 1 image if you want to stay busy >>132416466

What are fourth of July nights in Chicago usually like? More blood than usual?

>horses need to be blocked off

>>132418678
What do you think dumbass?

>>132418678
It's the purge basically

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>cars are going around the horses

>>132418678

Oooooohhhhh yes. Its glorious. Last season was a bloodbath.

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Horse units!

What's going on that they need horse units tonight?!

I'm only asking because horses tend to freak the fuck out over fireworks, why the heck do they need them?

>>132418678
and it's only 8:55pm

>>132418717
Oh yeah fireworks and gunshots durr

I bet there will be a lot of gunfire in Chiraq tonight.

>drug dogs needed

>>132418255
good enough. I just tossed them out like I said I would. not lurking full-time, beer, food, friends, but here off and on.

>>132418801
proly for crowd control at the fireworks at the pier

>>132418801
traffic control. they got streets blocked off, likely for some kinda city sponsored fireworks display

Hey guys I'm new to these threads. Which one is Robert?

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>>132418790

>>132418945
Was it the guy who just said "You gotta give me a good location" ?

>>132418801
These are ghetto horses. They don't give a fuck about noise or cubs fans. They'd toothbursh shank your pussy ass horse from Montana.

>>132418772
>switchblade
>illegal
switchblades are legal, again.

>>132418945
Robert is still putting his gear on and war paint. Robert will make his appearance in an hour

>>132418945
Hi, newfag. Read the OP.

>>132418908
You must be new here

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>>132418945
That should sum it up

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>>132416649
i finished her last night

Is this dispatcher sassy or crabby? Shes handling the roberts like shes a dog walker.

>>132418945
Essentially they are the night shift patrolling units

>>132418945
see >>132416656

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Dispatch is sounding extra-sassy, especially with people expecting cops to answer fireworks calls tonight.

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>>132418678
>>132418753
>>132418790
>>132418864
The blood pact that keeps the spirit of Communism entrapped in the constitution needs to be reinstated every year at the height of summer.

>>132419119
crabby was on last night. dunno if she is gonna come on tonight or not.

>>132418908
>I bet fireworks are going to be more popular than usual tonight too

>>132418945
Robert starts his duty in an hour

>>132419119
crabby has a raspy voice, from what sounds like a 3 pack a day habit

>>132419171
tonight is probably all hands so she'll be around

>Amberlance

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>>132418945

No one really knows who Robert is. He prowls the streets at night, fighting evil-doers and defending the American way of life.

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Real Robert hours start in 60 minutes

>>132419034
Not in all states anon. Not in Chicago.

>>132419171
crabby was sounding rough last night.
>>132419144
wait until midnight when the keys are not checked.

>>132419243
how bad do you think she is in need of a long drag after 8 hours of dealing with Chicagos bullshit?

>>132419187
constant fireworks explosions make good cover for male black to pop off and git a bitch

((((fireworks))) more like tietie got a cap basted in his ass

>>132419316
she hadn't been on since the two Roberts got ambushed.

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Who has this seasons Cast of characters pic?

>>132419004

That was Adam.

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>>132419215
comfy time

>male near corner store requesting EMS, fell near store and leg is purple

Purple leg

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It's always purple nigga! You black!!

>>132419114
very nice

>person stabbed
>male hurt his leg at the corner store and is requesting EMS
>2 males in an alley shooting a gun in the air

SHOTS FIRED

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>>132415966
17.76
66
Across from pic
Pretty damn America, anon

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>>132418772

UK edition

>>132419360
when shes gone for like 10 minutes i know shes out there with a pall mall.

>purple leg
still waiting on LOUD MARIACHI

>>132419422
Granny!?

>male fell, hurt his leg
>dispatch does a heavy disproving sigh

>>132419114
Nice saved anon. Im a drawfag too but currently waiting to see if im approved for my apartment, living out of my van, so no oc to contriboot for now.

purple leg nigga

>>132419312
true
if only America was White

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>>132419404

Don't forget we have Roberta also working the street.

>fires put out
the first of many

>>132419399
we crabby #2 now. real crabby is prolly dead but hopefully retired enjoyijng a pension

>>132419399
Details anon?

>>132419572
real crabby was on last night tho

>Walgreens

Did she ask the unit to head over to 62David?

Who's he?

>>132419507
your grandma was a half-breed?

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>>132418678
>What are fourth of July nights in Chicago usually like? More blood than usual?
Very peaceful nights of course, male black has had a few days off and must get up early for work tomorrow. Tonight is spent just loving our country, our way of life, and being grateful for all they have already received

FYI: Do Heaven got a ghetto?

dafuq

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>>132419477
bin that knife!

>>132419601
Two Roberts standing outside their car on another car when some La Raza gang bangers rolled up and shot both of em. Roberts survived and they pretty much locked down the back of th yards until they found the shooters

8:00p Shoot-o-Rahm-a Tally: 8 killed, 57 wounded
Oh boy, i wonder how high it will go.

>only has bullets no gun

>fireworks hit a tree in the back yard
>it is now smoking

>>132419741
on another *call

>>132419522
i wish i could draw. i have 0 talent, i can just manipulate images. thats rosemary from hong kong phooey.

>>132419550
I hated the way they put the badge on the wrong side just to keep LAPD off their back because they didn't like the show

>>132419601

Someone has a link I'm sure, it's pretty hard to listen to. Two cops were targeted by a gang member. Robert went nuts trying to find the scumbag who attacked them. Not sure if either died. It was a tough night.

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>>132419477

>>132419638
there was a crabby that left last year

>>132419874
is crabby some kinda clone that they have multiple versions on ice under the dispatch building or what?

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>>132419768
Days ago I predicted 10 dead 70 injured.

>Guy with a vodka bottle

>Vodka bottle battery

>he's dead 130rd

>>132419741
>>132419828
Wow yeah if someone does have a link please let me know

>>132419638

I thought that was her.

-40 people setting off fireworks

-Group of people firing off guns

>Group of people firing guns outside

Here we go.

>>132415966
wow, you went to a 7-eleven in a hipster stronghold. how ever did you manage to survive?

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>>132419550
>Don't forget we have Roberta also working the street.
Round the clock Roberta workin 24 hour shifts like a nurse....of deatj!

>>132419871

I don't know witch is odder. That you would sell that many metal teaspoons at once, or that you would sell them in such an odd number.

>>132420034
https://youtu.be/Tr_VbIg5LrU

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bingo guise, how's this?
>commencing baking

>vodka bottle
battery
>must be high on cocaine

>>132419803
Practice really. Natural talent isnt everything, its more like a jumping off point but no practice vs no n natural with talent and the latter will always be better.

>>132420034
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tr_VbIg5LrU
Its rough to hear. just warnin ya

>>132419968
i imagine a group of pretty white woman that started out in their early 20's in the mid 90's that had high hopes of making a difference by 2017 theyve become chain smokers, heard it all done it all and have a wrinkle from every crime theyve had to dispatch roberts to.

>>132420034

Audio is shitty. I'm telling ya, it's not a fun listen.

>>132420120
>I don't know witch is odder. That you would sell that many metal teaspoons at once, or that you would sell them in such an odd number.
the 57p is the price, in Pence? Brits are weird when it comes to what they call their money.

blue shirt!! mark it off

>>132419673
>muder someone
>dispose of weapon in helpful bin

>shot in the head
>critical

>critical shot in the head

>>132419673

Has a knife ever been put into one of those unironically? Not just someone having a larf and putting a butter knife in.

>2 victims, one in critical condition, shot in the head, going to viola hospital
>other victim is in serious condition

>>132419601

WARNING: It is a pretty rough listen. Listening live was shocking as it was a pretty quiet night.
https://youtu.be/Tr_VbIg5LrU

>>132420362
wait, do they do that? really? I see your flag, don't lie to me.

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>>132420120
they wear down with frequent use and Brit tea is very corrosive

>>132420211
im old anon. really old like grand kids old. i missed my chance. one of my sons has a natural talent for art and music though. so at least i get to see the two talents i wanted most.

>Pt#1:
>critical
>shot in the head

WHY WAS SHE BEHIND THE BANK GUYS?

>>132420419
I think I saw a pic of one of those knife bins, it was overflowing with trash

>fireworks in the background of the radio

did I just hear a bunch of fireworks in the background??

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>>132419659
Tyrone might go to hell, but all his cousins n shit be in heaven at the local foonrall prawller and chicken shack!

Dem fireworks in the background
What wasthayyhey said about those lil black kids?

>>13241954
Lol. At least Illinois has good gun laws. I just bought a pistol and I laughed when I saw the sticker on the case that said "Not legal in California and w/ high capacity magazine".

>>132420135
bread in the oven. last chance to request another spot on the bingo card

>>132420563
saved

>>132420124
>>132420223
>>132420241
Damn anons thats sad, im glad they both made it. Hard to understand the fo1rst officer but crazy.

>a black father.
R A R E

What's Male Black up to tonight?

>>132420455
Think about it, I've seen quite a threw throughout north London.
>you've stabbed someone
>need to dispose of evidence
>see bin containing a bunch of knives
what would you do?

do i get credit for being a local

>>132420688
>Hard to understand the fo1rst officer but crazy.
that initial adrenaline rush, O got to feel it quite a few times in (the real) Iraq

>>132420305

That makes more sense. Burger like me sees xxp, I think pieces.

>hospital band on
>still got things stuck in him from the hospital
>passed out in the street

>>132420458
My mother is a really fucked veteran and i know she lives through what i do even if i find it unbareable, but hey isnt that what kids are for?

>>132420797
Go chimp out in the street and scream "I'M DOING THIS FOR /POL/. HEIL HITLER" So we can listen to you get arrested.

>man with things still stuck in him laying in the street

>>132416662
Take a guess.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XON4kCdAqR8

>>132420563
>you will never open a fish and chicken restaurant in this ideal of a location

why live

>in the street mark it

>>132420796
so when some Chav shanks another Chav, I guess the first thing they do is check the bins? also, is it Shav, or Ch-av

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>>132415966
grizz for under $5 a tin
when I was in lexington, ky it was $2.23
fucking $9.57 in mass

>freakin fireworks

Adams over it.

>>132420801
What were you in? My mother was transport, cousin was heli mechanic and his chopper had actually gone down and missin for a few days. Hes alive and well.

>>132420946
Well, I know where you can get a good deal on a classy foonerawl

>>132420924
it makes us feel good to see them succeed. grandkids on the other hand are all the fun and none of the pain

How do they do it guys? How do they deal with literal wild animals?

>grass is on fire

evening ...merry chimp-mas jesus robert

Hahahah, cops won't be able to tell whether they're hearing fireworks or gunshots.

>>132421081
Army 11B, 2 tours

>>132421187
They want to make the world a better place one arrested nig at a time

Holy shit it sounds like a war zone now that the sun is down. So many fireworks. Beaners sure do like the 4th.

>>132420089

I live in a hipster stronghold anon. It's nuts. They need to die off.

>>132421025

Better than $12 when i lived in Alaska.

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>>132421187

Who calls in fireworks complaints on the 4th of July

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god speed robert

>>132421208
the lord said evil will only destroy it's self. Enjoy your freedoms to hate, but always rise above this coonery.

>>132421358
more importantly, how do they have fireworks since fireworks are illegal there

>check yo keys

>>132421430
>more importantly, how do they have fireworks since fireworks are illegal there
gary indiana like the guns?

Goddammit Adam check the fuckin key already

>>132420646
How are we on the bread, anon?

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>>132421430
indiana

>>132421430
The same way they have guns.

>>132421025

Chicago has very high taxes on actual cigarettes but other tobacco products are somehow kinda cheap.

Pack of bugler tobacco is 3.50

>>132421476
i think he burnt it

That key is OPEN!

>>132421430

Out of state purchases. Maybe the internet?

>>132421475
one day this is going to get someone killed. What could be done to fix it?

fuckin Adam, this is not the night to be a fuck up

>>132421430
Surrounded by 5 states without anti-fireworks laws. Makes about as much sense as banning gun ownership in Chicago since it's legal everywhere else in the state.

>adam is fucking this shit up

>>132421580
robocops

its that why niggas always be killing niggas?
> evil destroying it self

>>132421517

Where is bugler 3.50?