>*satanic guitar riff plays*
>The devil in the white house, the slender man, the commander and grief has utterly destroyed this nation in a scorched earth campaign. This islamo-fascist RAT, THIS BUM AIDED BY THE LOW LIFE VERMIN IN THE MEDIA, THE JAKE TAPWATERS, THE ANDERSON BLOOPERS. THESE - THESE - THESE...I can't say it...its a family show
>Anyway, I was on my way to my favorite little Italian restaurant on the water when I saw a degenerate marxist feminist ride her bike past me with blue hair. I couldn't even enjoy my spaghetti and meatballs after that, and it wasn't because the meatballs aren't as big as they used to be...its just..I don't know I'm in a bad mood. I had two vodka martinis now I have a headache
>But the craziest thing happened to me while I was eating there, Teddy was so worried..I was eating my meatballs and the crown on my tooth popped out, does this dentist have any idea what he's doing? ITS THE THIRD TIME THIS WEEK. I'm chewing this meatball and I'm thinking "Wait a minute, there is nothing hard in meatballs". Sure enough I spit it out and there it is.
>Let's go to the calls..we have no time left in the hour. Be here or be nowhere.
>Swiss America ad