"Racist" jokes thread post jokes from your homeland

>>130128898
How do you know an abo chick is on her period?

She's only wearing one sock.

>>130128898
What do 100 niggers do when jumping off a cliff. They're doing something good

(It was hard to translate)

>>130128898
How do you babysit a nigger? get a strip of velcro and stick em to the wall.

>>130128898

What do you call a white duck?

A quacker.

A nigger, chink and a spic walk into a bar.

The bartender says "get the fuck out".

>>130129636
kek gross

How does a black woman tell if she's pregnant?

When she pulls out the tampon, all the cotton is picked off.

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Attention all mudsharks report to the std clinic we have bad news

a joke = white female mudsharks

>>130128898
Q. What is Long and Black?

A. Welfare Line
A.2 Line at KFC

Q. How do you kill a nigger?
A. Hide his welfare Check under his work boots.

Q. What is difference between a large pizza and a Nigger?
A. Large pizza can feed a family of four.

Q. What kind of nigger is safe to be around?
A. The ones that are Hanging Around.

Q. What did the nigger use as his alibi in his rape case?
A. Didindu Nuffin

>>130128898
what is long and hard on a black man?

third grade

What do you call an italian hooker?

A pasta-tute

>>130128898
A nigger, a gyp and a kebab are each fired out of a cannon, hurtling towards the sun. Who wins?

Society.

Why Albania sucks at swimming competitions?
The few than knew how to swim already left the country.

>>130128898
What separates humans from animals?

The Mediterranean

Do you have anything against refugees?

Yes, machine guns and grenades.

>Ancient Rome
>Crowd wants some fun
>They bring a nigger and a lion
>They are supposed to fight in an arena.
>The judges look at the nigger
>Hey he looks too big lets dig him into the ground
>They dig him up to his waist
>Hey he still looks too big
>They dig him up to his neck
>Battle begins
>They release the lion
>The lion see the nigger's head and starts running
>At the last moment the nigger tilts his head
>The lion trips against his ear, does a barrel roll and breaks its neck
>The lion is dead
>The crowd goes silent
>Suddently someone from the crowd shouts
>Play fair you fucking nigger

>>130128898
What do niggers and bikes have in common?

They both work best with a chain on.

What's the difference between a nigger and a bucket of shit?

The bucket

>>130132211

>tfw too stupid to get this one

The difference between a nigger and a tire? When you chain them,the tire doesn't sing
(difficult to traslate well)

What did the nigger get on his SAT?

BBQ sauce

>>130128898
>racist jokes
>funny racism a ha ha
>rip-off jokes about russians / poles where the russian / the polak is replaced by negro

Can we concentrate on original content please?

a black a jew and a mexican walk into a bar
who pays?
the government

>>130132701
I get it. (In American nigger slang "sling" means selling drugs)

>>130132001
Ahahahahahahahahahaahanaahaahaa
Ty mongolbro

>>130133020
learn2read

What do you call sleeping abos on the road?
Speedhumps

What's the difference between an abo and a park bench
A park bench can support a family

What's long, brown and smells like shit?
The line into centrelink (australian welfare office)

What is the contour integral around Eastern Europe?

Zero. Because all the poles are in the UK.

It's funny but most of you won't get it...

>>130128898
Czym się różni humanista od balkonu?
Balkon potrafi utrzymać rodzinę
heheahehaehaehaeheahaeheeahe

Can you guys fucking stop the black jokes. I have a few black people in my family tree. Now that I think about it I think there's a few more hanging there.

>>130128898
Nigger, Spic and Gypsy are sitting in the car, who is driving?
A cop.

Why do Jews have big noses?
Because air is free.

>>130128898
Why do niggers wear big brimmed hats?

So birds don't shit on their lips.

A white french is in a hot air balloon. With him, there's a white English lad and an Algerian. After a journey with no problem, they are loosing altitude quickly. They decide to release some weight by removing the sacks strapped on, but it's of no use, they're getting closer and closer to the ground at a high speed.
The englishman advice the others to remove some of their belongings, so they can get out of this mess. The englishman throws out his tea cup service and some biscuit, the others asked him why would he throw this in particular, "Plenty enough back at home" he said. The Algerian throws out his goat and some traditional clothes, the others ask the same question, they got the same answer. The frenchman waits a bit, the others are starting to get anxious. He then picks up the Algerian and throws him out of the hot balloon. The Anglo, panicked and furious, grab him by the throat and asks the french why would he do that, with a smug, the frog responds "Plenty enough back home".

2 men are driving a truck and one is asleep in the back. The guy in the back hears 'thunk......thunk'.

The driver says 'ah dont worry bout that mate i just hit a stray abo' to which the guy in the back says 'but we hit 2 things what was the other?'
The driver replies 'dont worry mate i just had to go through a fence to get him'

>>130128898
What do you call a Samoan swimming under a bridge?

Leanofa tufaa fellofa

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Why do seagulls have wings?
To beat the Maoris to the Dump!

>>130133246
Keked

>>130133459
What do you say to a shitskin who wears expensive clothes at a special event?
"The defendant will rise"

A jew meets another jew, the two are friends who haven't seen each other in a decade. They decide to party a bit, get drunk...etc. When they sober up, the first jew explains he has a unique trade for the second jew, extraordinary jeans so cheap no one an refuse this offer, of course the second jew accept, he wanders off back home and gets some sleep. The next day, a truck arrives with the precious goods, the jew unload all the merchandise and inspects a crate. He gets furious when he founds out the jeans, as much resistant and good looking they are, only fit one leg. Angered, he goes back to the other jew to have some explanations. The latter says this to him "You didn't understand, they're not made to be worn. It's to buy and sell, buy and sell, buy and sell...etc."

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>>130133701
What do you call a constipated Samoan?
Far too Fulla Feces

>>130128898
How do you know your house has been robbed by an abo?
Your thongs are missing and your dogs pregnant

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Why are they called boongs?

That's the sound they make when they bounce off your roo bar.

What do you call abo women who have an abortion?

Crimestoppers

>>130133213
contour integral around western europe = 0
because all the simple poles are in the east

>>130128898
1 nigger in ther river: the pollution
all niggers in the river: the solution

>>130128898
What's the fastest way to get a nigger down from a tree?

You cut the rope

>>130130859
that is still funny

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SG0QdKzATW8

>>130132211
holy shit i lost

Back knowledge - "kaffertjie" a little nigger

What kind of key can open anything?
A car key?
A door key?
An electronic key?

Nope, a kaffertjie

>>130129636
I don't get it?

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New family swimming pool

>>130135145
because she put the other sock inside her pussy
thats the joke

>>130128898
How do you say Alice in wonderland in arab?
Fatimah in Aldi (cheap supermarket).

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>>130135145
she's using her sock as a tampon you fuckin bong

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>>130128898

>>130133213

complex analysis chink

>>130130859
That's a classic here.

>>130134133
By thongs you people mean flip-flops, right?

What is the difference between boy scout and Jew?

A boy scout comes home from camp

>>130135550
kek

>>130128898
How many jews can fit in a car?
One in the driving seat, one on the drivers side, two on the passenger seats, and one hundred in the ashtray

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>>130132001
Also, divorce

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>>130132919
>>130133213

Why do persians cover their house in rugs?
So that when a guest drops a coin they can't hear it.


Down in Israel Persians and Yemenites are the stereotypical greedy guys.

What do you call it when an abo falls off a cliff?
A good start.
What do you call it when a hundred abos fall off a cliff?
An abolanche.

Truck driver doing the long haul from Melbourne to Perth. Sees three Abos ahead on the road. Thinks "Bewdy", puts his foot flat down on the accelerator, speeds down the road, hits them all.
One Abo gets knocked into a nearby paddock; one gets smashed through the truck's windscreen; the other lands 100 yards down the road, gets up and runs away. Just then a cop car pulls up. "Oh, no!!" thinks the truckie. Cop asks truckie what happened, truckie thinks he'd better "come clean", so tells him the truth.
"No worries" says the cop, "we'll charge the first Abo with trespass, the second with break and enter, and the third with leaving the scene of an accident".

On another journey, the truckie gives a lift to a priest. Later, as he's barrelling down the road, he sees an Abo ahead, he plants the foot down, and speeds towards him. At the last moment he remembers he's got the priest on board, and swerves to miss the Abo.
*BOONG*
"I'm terribly sorry about that, Father".
"That's OK, my son, I got him with the door".

Bruce was driving his ute down a dirt track out past the black stump when he sees an abo walking along carrying two sheets of corrugated iron and a carton of stubbies. He stops to give the abo a lift and the abo chucks his stuff in the back of the ute and gets in.
"What are you doing wandering round the outback with two sheets of corrugated iron and a carton of stubbies?" Bruce asks.
The abo says "My wife kicked me out. Took me to court. She got the kids and I got the house and contents."

>>130135531
yes

>>130128898
Why do niggers stink so badly? So blind people can hate them too.

What do you call a Muslim between 2 houses?
Ali
A drunk Muslim between 2 houses?hammed Ali
An even drunker Muslim between 2 houses?
Mohammed Ali

A gypo a nigger and a moor go in a car. Whos driving?
The police

>>130136375
My ID almost says oi fag!

>>130128898
>You've got a mattamassa on your back!

Yo, what's a "mattamassa"?

>Nothing nigger, now go pick some me some cotton!

Hitler is commanding bunch of jews at the cliff.
-you ze get your arms straight above your head.
A jew does that and gets kicked off the cliff.
-you ze get your arms straight by ze shoulders and bow your head.
A jew does that and gets kicked off the cliff.
Suddenly high officer runs towards Hitler:
-Mein Fuhrer ze hab vital information about...
-SCHEISSE HANS! Why you always have to interrupt me when I'm playing tetris

Why is it rare to see anal in nigger porns?
Because it could turn into a scat porn and no one would notice.

>>130128898
whats the difference between bigfoot and a hardworking black man?

bigfoots been spotted!

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>>130135937
>in Israel
> someone not jews are stereotypical greedy guys

>white guy, black guy, and mehican guy walking on beach
>find genie lamp, rub it, genie grants each one wish
>mexican "I waaaant to be back en Mehico with mi familia y hijos y hijas and all my mehican hombres y señoritas with all mehicans at peace and prosperity and no gringos"
>genie waves poof the mehican disapeeers
>black guy elbows in next "yo mah nig genie daauuummmn dats dah bomb same ting excep with the nigs yo know? back in afrika with all mah nigs"
>genie waves poof no more black guy
>white guy is flabergasted "you mean all the spics and all the nigs are GONE from America?"
>genie "yes"
>white guy eyes wide thinks a moment
>"I think I'll have a Coke"

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>>130135531
nah for some reason abos are really into panties

>>130136933
well it makes sense really, they're not gonna go around calling each other greedy kikes

>>130135978
the one with the priest was golden

Why are blacks getting stronger?
TVs are getting bigger.

How do you starve a black?
Put his Giro under his work boots

Why do you take a bucket of shit to an Indian wedding?
Keep the flies off the bride.

>>130137228
We do

>>130136995
why do they all have fat stomachs and skinny pencil legs?

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>>130137831
Dunno. Swollen belly/stick legs is a popular look in africa, comes from protein deficient diet. Could be that.

>>130135145
Ausfag "humor". It's not supposed to be funny. Don't laugh.

Why do niggers hate the Forrest? They don't like to hang around trees

Why Arab invented triathlon ?

They came to the swimming pool by foot , swing and came back at bicycle

>>130131665
>>130131679
>>130131761
>>130132001
>>130132054
>>130132222
>>130133329
>>130133559
all excellent

>>130134476
>roo bar
holy shit this is funnier than anything. you cunts have ROO BARS?!

Farmer looking for a farmhand
Kid applies
>take this gun and kill 5 niggers and a rabbit
>why the rabbit?
>you've got the job

>>130137831
Too much eating, not enough work

>>130140002
kek. Heard a different version but thats funnier

>>130133213
Thank you maths chink

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A trash collector arrives at a Maori's house and doesn't see his rubbish out for collection, he yells "hey where's ya bin?"
The Maori bloke yells back "bro just went to Samoa, bloody great aye, relax on the sands aye cuz"
The garbage collector yells "na I mean where's ya wheelie bin?"
Maori guy says "aw you got me bro, been in jail aye"

>>130129636
how do you get an aboriginal chick pregnant?

just cum on the floor and let the flies do the rest.

How do you tell if a black girl is pregnant?

Put a tampon up her, when you pull it out the cotton will be gone.

White guy, an chink and a nigger on the run from police.
See a dark lane with potato sacks
All hide in potato sacks
Police approach, noticing movement in the sacks
Walks up, kicks the first sack with the white guy in
>ee ee ee
Oh, must be rats
Kicks second sack with chink in
>meeoow
Oh, must be a cat
Kicks third with nigger in
>Potatos

>>130128898
>BASED Zizek

>>130128898

This is not funny at all

>>130128898
So a gorgeous blonde gets drunk one night and starts making her way down the bar.

First she sees a chinese guy, she drags him back into the bathroom and sucks on his eggroll for a bit. He comes out looking like a million dollars but she isn't satisfied.

Then she sees a Mexican guy, she takes him in the back and lets him play with her taco. They come out and he proudly lets all his cousins sniff his fingers, but she still hasn't had enough.

So the next guy is a nigger, she grabs him, pulls him into the ladies' stalls and lets him baste her turkey. She comes out, finally tired from all the fuckin and suckin and sits at the end of the bar next to a white guy.

She leans in and whispers in the white guy's ear and he laughs so loud the whole bar hears it. Then she gets up, gives him her number, and leaves. The Nigger and the Spic and the Chink surround the guy and ask him what she said. The white guy says to 'em,

"She said she'd heard you could meet cute guys at the zoo, but she had no idea you were allowed to get drunk and fuck the animals while you waited."

What’s an irishman's seven course dinner? A six-pack and a potato.

A nigger tried to blow up a car.
Burned his lips on the exhaust.

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Rachid and Ahmed are in a car, who's driving?
The police.

What do you says to [insert violent minority] in a suit?
Defendant please stand up.

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws?
Because RUN-NIGANIGANIGA - RUN-NIGANIGA

>>130141418
fuck I can't breathe

>>130141667
What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish wake? One less drunk Irishman.

>>130141713
Wow we have the same jokes here

>>130128898
What's yellow and mows the lawn?
It's my nigger I'll paint it whatever colour I want

>>130128898
A guy is chucking logs in a wood chipper while a nigger stands behind him, watching.

A man passes and asks him what he's doing. He says, "Chuckin'. I'm a Chucker by trade."

Then the man asks what the nigger is doing standing around watching.

The guy says, "He doesn't do much at all, but I guess that's what you get for hiring a Spare-Chucker."

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>>130128898
How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman?
>none
A Muslim and a black guy are fighting and they both end up falling off a cliff, who wins?
>society
Why doesn't Mexico do very well at the Olympics?
>Because all of the ones who can run, climb and swim well are already in America
What did the Jew with an erection say when he walked into a wall?
>Ouch, my nose!

>>130128898
What is the first thing a nigger does after he has sex?

Wipes the pepper spray out of his eyes.

2 dutch men and a turk go to a bar, and they challenge eachother to a drinking contest. The first to go take a piss loses, they go and drink beers. First dutchmen takes a piss, and after that the second one. The turk keeps drinking and drinking, finally the two ask how he could drink so much without going to the toilet, the turk says: "turki turki isnt dumb, turki turki diaper wear"

Whats the turkish version of allice in wonderland?
Fatma in the lidl

What do you call a turk on the moon?
A problem
What do you call all turks on the moon?
Problem solved.

What do you call a turk sitting on a trash can?
A land owner

What do you call a trash can under a traffic light?
Turkish disco

if a white baby dies it goes to heaven and turns into an angel, what happens when a black baby dies?

it turns into a bat.

How many niggers do you need to paint a wall?

It depends of the strength you smack them with

>>130140002

Kek

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How did God make Italians? He got a piece of shit in one hand and a piece of shit in the other and went *WOP*!

Did you know Zyclon is a Jew owned company? Yeah turns out hitler committed suicid ewhen the kikes gave him the gas bill.

>>130142144
A young jew was obsessed with reading books.He he has read every book in his house, and in the library, except one.
Yj: Sorry mister, what's that book? I wanna read it!
Lk: The book's called "Death". I can sell it for you for only 10shekels, but you have to promise me, that you won't read last page.
The young jew agreed and purchased it. After reading it whole, he decided to break the promise and read the last page. Text was saying:

Recommended price - 5 shekels

did u hear about the nigger that died on the highway?
he stuck his head out the window and his bottom lip beat him to death

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>>130128898

Why there are no jews on jupiter?

Because it's a gas planet.

Nigger, muslim and jew jump off from the roof. Who wins?

Society.

The only good thing jews ever invented was the holocaust.

>>130135089
topkek

Q: Why was the wheelbarrow invented?
A: To teach niggers to walk on two legs

A nigger looked up his family tree, a monkey shat on his face.

There were 3 men standing on a cliff, a christian, a Muslim, and a Hindu. The christian says, "If i jump, my god will catch me". He jumps and Jesus catches him. The muslim says the same thing, "If i jump, my god will catch me". He jumps and Allah catches him. The Hindu, again, says the same thing, "If I jump, my god will catch me". He jumps, falls and dies. His gods were too busy fighting over who would catch him.

>>130128898
A Jew dies and reports to St. Peter for judgement.

St. Peter checks his list of names and says, "There's a problem here, this thing says you're a Jew."

The Jew recoils and says, "So what? We're God's chosen people, I got a right to be there, I demand to talk to the almighty!"

So St. Peter sighs and calls God, and God comes down to the gate and asks if there's a problem.

"Of course there's a problem! This goy is telling me I can't get into heaven because I'm a Jew!"

God says, "Yep, that's right."

The Jew says, "Well why the hell aren't Jews allowed in heaven?!"

God sighs again and says

"Well pal, the streets are paved with Gold and fuck me if we're gonna have any potholes in heaven."

So it happened: Israel finally started their own space program. So the brave Jews in their kosher rocket went to space. They fly and fly by the planets, stars etc., at some point they are so far they start to fly by some chunks of antimatter. Whatever, they go further, by the antigalaxies and antistars. They look around and suddenly see an antiplanet. They decide to land. And they land on an antifield. They look around and there is an antiforest and a little antihouse on its edge. Antismoke coming from the antichimney. They come to the house, look into the antiwindow - see nothing. They open the antidooor and here, in the antiroom, by the antitable are sitting the antisemites.

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Whats the worst part about being a black jew?
You have to sit in the back of the oven.

But seriously guys, dont make fun of niggers, i have some black people in my family tree... theyre still hanging there

>>130143924
God could have also replied with
"because it's heaven."

>>130145581
That info graphic is disturbingly accurate. Except th einterpretation of the last panel, but ah that's the nature of the esoteric isn't it.

Right a racial joke. er. Shit. For a nazi I am not good at being racist. Something something Jews something something sheckleovens. There I tried.

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>>130128898
Why do Jews watch a porno reverse?

They cum when the hooker gives back the money


What is the difference between a trampoline and a nigger?

You take off your shoes when you jump on a trampoline


Why are Jewish men circumcised?

Because Jewish women don't want to touch things that don't have atleast a 20% cut

How can you tell when a nigger is lying?
His lips are moving

What do you call a black man with half a brain?
Gifted

How do parents in Africa celebrate their child's first birthday?
They bring flowers to his grave

Jesus tells us that our faith can move mountains. Muhammad tells us our faith can move skyscrapers.

Why can't niggers get a PhD?
They can't get past their masters.

What's the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl? You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.

What's black, has eight legs, and makes women scream?
Gang rape

A black guy, white guy and a jew get hit and killed by a bus crossing the street. Suddenly, they're all three standing before st. peter and the white guy demands to be set back to earth because he has a family that needs him. The jew and black make the same demand. St. Peter says let me talk to the Boss and comes back after five minutes and says that the three can go back to earth and live the rest of their lives if they'll pay him $1000.

The white guy gets out his wallet immediately, takes out 10 $100 bills, hands them to St. Peter and poof, he's back on earth walking across the intersection. He tells his best friend about the experience and the friend thinks he's lost his mind but that he'll see his delusion if he questions him about it, so he asks, "what happened to he other two people?". The white guy replied, "well, the Jew had him down to $500 and the black guy was arguing that he should be able to pay with his EBT card.

There's a Pakistani, an Iraqi and an Albanian in a car, who's driving it?
The cop

>>130128898
A blonde and a brunette throw themselves off a building.

Who lands first?

The brunette because the blonde got lost on the way.

>>130128898
What's the difference between a jew and a pizza?

A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

>>130128898
How do you fit 10 jews in a car?

In the ashtray.

Actually said this to a hood black person: why did god give blacks big dicks? To make up for putting pubes on their heads

A nigger at the bottom of the ocean - polution.
All niggers at the bottom of the ocean - solution.

What's the difference between a desk and a nigger? Desk can support a family.

Where's the higest concentration of Jews in the world? The atmosphere.

Hitler rounds up the Jews one day and tells them they'll play hide and seek in a wheat field. Those unfound are free to go. After they hide, Hitler says "Hans, start the combine."

Hitler asks a Jew girl waiting in the oven line how old is she.
"5, I'll soon be six"
"No you won't"

A gypsy marries a girl, and after the first night, his dad asks him how good was she in bed.
Gypsy: She was a virgn.
Dad: Kick her out, if she wasn't good enough for her family, she's not good for ours.

Who would win a football match in a gas chamber the jews or the nazis. The jews because it's their home field.

>>130128898
How come niggers run so fast?

Because those who don't are in jail.

>>130128898
why have shower eleven holes ?
because jews have only ten fingers

what's a jew next to a pile of ashes ?
a family photo

what is the best Hotel of the world ?
Auschwitz,because it has six million stars

>>130128898
Why are the niggers in the USA better than the niggers in Portugal?

Because they're far away.

>>130128898
What's the difference between niggers and cancer?

Cancer evolves.

we had a black out last night...were ok now tho.my neighbour shot him.

>>130128898
When does a nigger bathe?

When it rains.

>>130128898
these "jokes" all suck.
lemme show ya how it's done

a good ol boy is drivin his truck down a country lane deep in alabama and sees a minister standing by his broke down car
bein a good christian, he gives the minister a lift, and on the way to town he passes a pair of niggers walkin on the side of the road.
he grits his teeth and thinks, "man if the minister wasnt in the truck i'd run them niggers down!"

a little later he passes a few more niggers, he bites his lip and drives on

after a few minutes he sees a gaggle of 6 niggers boppin along the road and forgets all about the minister, and steers right into the crowd. thump thump thump thump thump, he bags 5 niggers and then remembers the minister is there.
he says ohh damn, sorry padre, i dunno what came over me, how can you forgive me?
the minister says, dont worry my son, i got the sixth one with the door.

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>>130128898
What is the difference between a dog shit and a black person?


Eventually the dog shit turns white and stops stinking.

Ba-dum-tish!

>>130152302
>why have shower eleven holes ?
>because jews have only ten fingers

>implying they can't plug the 11th hole with their nose
Checkmate nazis

>>130136995
>>130138564
Fun fact: Africans ate better as slaves on plantations than they did in Africa

How are blacks and fires alike?

They both ruin neighborhoods, they're both ashy, and they are both best dealt with using a fire hose

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aX-0Yj638SY

A native is sitting down at a bar when a gay guy comes up to him and says "Hey, you're pretty cute you think I could give you a blow job?".

The native gets up, takes him outside and beats him half to death, then sits back down at the bar.

The bartender asks him what the hell that was all about and the chug replies "I dunno, something about a job"

Why are blacks so tall? Because their knee grows.

What's black on top and white on the bottom?
>rape.

What's white on top and black on the bottom?
>society.

Q: How do you get a jewish girls number?
A: Roll up her sleeve.

Q: How do you move 100 Jews across a room?
A: With a broom.

Q: Why does the bride always wear white?
A: Because it's good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator

What's the difference between Hitler and Michael Phelps?

Phelps can finish a race.

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How many niggers does it take to start a riot?

Negative one.

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>>130131451
Oh shit nice one.

How long does it take a negress to take a shit?

Bout 9 months.

A toad and a rabbit fell down a deep dark hole. They hit their heads so hard they become amnesiac and forget what species they are. They agree to grope each other's face and describe what they feel to the other to find out what they are, since the hole is completly dark. Toad feels the rabbit face and tells him, 'ok, you are furry, you have long ears, long teeth and a small twitching nose".
Rabbit replies "cool! I'm a rabbit! Your turn" and starts groping Toad's face.
"Mhmm you have big swollen lips, a huge mouth, bulging eyes and bumpy skin".
Toad goes " oh fuck, I am a nigger"

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>>130132211

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>>130135978
thank you

Difference between a jew and a cookie?
cooking time

Protect your foreskin from those who, belong to the Bonnier jew!

Difficult to translate. Skydda förhuden ifrån Bonnier juden!

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A based blackman, a Jew and a grossly obese Mexican man walk into a gay bar.

They approach a flamboyant homosexual with a 2-inch long, always flaccid penis using a laptop at a table.

“You wanna come back to our place?” the blackman asks the queer guy. “You can toss my Mexican friend’s herpes-and-shit-covered salad and jerk my Jewish friend’s wart-and-pimple-covered penis while I ram my giant unlubed black-cock into your gaping oft-fucked asshole.”

“Literally nothing in the world would make me happier”, said the homosexual man. “But first I need to post a /ptg/ General on pol . It will just take a moment”

Filipinos are the most powerful race

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Why do niggers smell so bad?

So nlond people can hate them too.

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>>130160678
>blind

Q: Why does California have earthquakes and Alabama have niggers?
>A: California had first pick.

Q: Why did the Ethiopian baby cry?
>A: It was having a midlife crisis.

A plane carrying people from all over the world is caught in a heavy storm. One of the engines gets damaged, and the pilot announces that three passengers will have to jump out or the plane will crash.

A Briton promptly stands up, yells out "God Save the Queen" and jumps out.
Immediately afterwards, a Frenchman leaps out of the plane, yelling "Vive la France!".
For a while, nobody moves, until finally an American approaches the plane door, exclaims "Remember the Alamo!" and throws a Mexican out of the plane.

a group of Jews in Russia are wondering how to convince the Russians to stop hating them.
Their rabbi decides that obviously the Russians hate them because they don't drink, so he tells his congregation to all bring in a bottle of vodka, and they'll pour it into a big cauldron and drink until the Russians respect them.
One Jew says to his wife "hah! I'll bring water instead. With all the vodka in the cauldron, no one will be able to tell the difference and I won't have to buy a bottle of vodka"
when the day comes, the rabbi pours all of the vodka into the cauldron, takes out a cup and drinks some
"I get why the Russians hate us now"
>>130153666
literally posted further up, Satan

What's the difference between a cow and the Holocaust?
You can't milk a cow for 80 years

How do you stop a nig from drowning?
Take your foot off his head.

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza?
Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of shit.
The bucket.

What do you say when you see your TV floating in the dark?
"Drop it nigger"

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>>130128898

>At show with family
>Cousin gets coffee and randomly says I like my coffee black, but not my women.

Grandmother fucking loses it with laughter.
Happiest moment of my life.

What do you call 2 natives sleeping in a ditch?
> A sleepover.

What do you call an empty beer bottle on a native reservation?
>An ancient Indian Artifact.

What do you call an unopened beer bottle on an Indian reservation?
>An undiscovered ancient Indian Artifact

>>130161393
Actually, its "A German stands up and says 'Never Forget' and throws a Jew out"

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A Jew goes to temple one Sabbath day. He looks to skies and prays "Oh Yahweh! I'm deep in debt! I implore thee to let me win the lottery!"

God does not answer.

The next week, he goes to temple again. With greater passion, he looks to God and shouts "Oh great Yahweh! Please, I have to win it! I implore thee to let me win the lottery!"

God does not answer.

On the third Saturday, with tears in his eyes, the Jew falls to his knees and throws his hands to the sky. "OH GREAT YAHWEH! HELP ME, PLEASE, LET ME WIN THE LOTTERY!"

The clouds open. God descends from the heavens and shouts... "GOLDBERG, FOR FUCK'S SAKE, MEET ME HALF WAY AND BUY A FUCKING TICKET!"

>>130133213
I dare you to tell a joke about the residue ( India perhaps?)

>>130139284
Yeah that's the aussie term for bull bars on your car. If you drive for a while in the outback then you'll want them for suicidal roos

>>130128898
>homeland
>hides flag

Kys nigger

A Jewish boy goes to his father one day and says "Dad, can I have fifty dollars?" The dad responds, "Forty dollars, what do you need thirty dollars for?"

>>130131193
Severely underrated

>>130128898
>what do you call a black man?
>A NIGGER X-DDDD

A gypsy, a negro and an arab is in a car. Who is driving?
The police.

What did god say when he created the second negro?
Fuck I burnt another one!

What did the jew do with the ashtray?
Researched his family history.

All the children were allowed to join in on the play, except for Greger because he was a negro.
This one is much more fun in swedish as it rhymes and is one of many "All the children (alla barnen)"-stories.
In swedish its:
>Alla barnen fick vara med och leka förutom Greger för han var neger.

what do you call two niggers on a tandem bicycle.
oraganized crime.

>>130162670
Kek.
That was a good one!

>>130160469
Funniest joke on this thread.

What is an obese nigger falling from a building doing?

Playing Donkey Kong

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>>130136979

>>130130859
Funny cause it's true

>>130159859
Kek, I've never heard this one before.

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>>130155267

How many Austrian it takes to cross a river?
0 because they are going to get shot anyway

https://youtu.be/E9ZTjknblQM

One of my favorites

What's the difference between a man and a nigger?
You see someone coming from a distance and think: a man approaches.
But when he gets closer, nevermind it's a nigger.


Translating this really sucked.

>>130139234
I almost get it

A truck driver was hauling a load of bowling balls across the country one day and he spotted a couple of nigger kids with bicycles on the side of the road thumbing for a ride. He felt sorry for them and decided to give them a ride. "Y'all can ride," he said "but I just had the cab cleaned so you have to ride in the trailer. " The nigger kids threw their bikes in the back of the trailer and climbed in on top of the bowling balls.

A few hours later the truck driver forgot about them and got pulled over by a state trooper. The trooper checked his license and paperwork and said, "I'll let you go, but I just need to check your cargo first."

The trooper went to the back of the trailer and opened the door and looked in. Suddenly he slammed the door shut, ran back 20 feet, then spun around and drew his pistol. He grabbed his radio and yelled "BACKUP! I NEED BACKUP! I'VE GOT A MAN SMUGGLING A LOAD OF NIGGER EGGS INTO THE STATE, AND TWO HAVE ALREADY HATCHED AND STOLEN BIKES!"

how many niggers does it take to pave a driveway?
depends how thin you slice them

>>130132919
>be polish loan shark
>lend all the money
>skip town

Ok. This is a localization of an old joke
>after Trump became president niggers from BLM decide to assassinate him
>because 'they WUZ KANGS' they decide to build own balistic missile and hit Washington DC
>so they build the tube from KFC buckets, make the fuel out of a moonshine and create a fuse out of womens wigs.
>Once it is set up niggers gather around the rocket to watch the start
>BLM leader sets fire to the fuse
>Great explosions ensues
>Half of niggers are dead, the other half is bleeding to death
>The leader of BLM, without his leg and arm, takes a look at the site and says
>Dayum ... if half of my niggas are dead and the other half is dying I cannot even imagine what kind of hell is going on at White House

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What is the difference between tires and niggers?

>Tires don't sing when you put chains on them.

>>130132701
It makes sense. Niggers breaking rocks on the side of the road would sing when chained up, being prisoners and all.

>>130161854

The cow one was funny because it was true.

>>130128898

armenian is a kike who followed a coin into a church

What did the Englishman say when he found his wife fucking 3 men?

"Hello hello hello"

>>130128898
A black Jewish boy runs home from school one day and asks his father, “Daddy, am I more Jewish or more black?” The dad replies, “Why do you want to know, son?” “Because a kid at school is selling a bike for $50 and I want to know if I should talk him down to $40 or just steal it!”

>>130132001
Lolollolol

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>>130131193
kek

>>130131132
We were having a good time telling jokes about niggers and you had to drop that. Fuckin racist.