I'm here for the job interview. As I'm sure you're

I encourage you to speak to my extremely conservative lawyer.

Wrong. I'm faggot-sexual

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>>129450493
>As I'm sure you're aware, Section 2, Line 38 of the LGBT Equality Act requires you to hire me.
Prove it faggot.

Oh really? Did you know I identify as an attack helicopter?

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>>129450493
Please take a seat over there.

>>129450493
Can you start tommorow?

>>129450493
Did you just assume everybodies sexual orientation?

>>129450493
I kek'd

>>129450493
>assuming your sexual partner's gender

I'm sorry we don't hire bigots

>>129450493
Even if your post wasn't complete bullshit, couldn't they just hire a normal homo? Like, on e that takes it in the ass but doesn't dress like a clown?

>>129450493
As you didn't state your orientation I am free to fire you for your stupid hair. We only hire those with natural hair colors that exist on humans

>>129450493
*Unzips*
Lets see what you can do

You don't posses the skills.

Your personal appearance is lacking.

You aren't suited for the role.

We want someone with more enthusiasm.

Ect.

>>129450493
This is unironically what we're headed towards

>>129451038
Of fug I think he did.

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*blocks your path*

Women of Colour take precedet of white male faggots Checkm8

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>>129450493
>here's your signing bonus sweetie

>>129450809
Only correct answer.

>Hey Fred, you mind signing that form that says you're gay?

>>129450493
>My apologies good xir.
>Straitens tie
>Now follow me to the restroom for your pre employment drug screening.
>I'll also need you to sign this contract volunteering for a hair follicle sample that you're financially responsible for if the sample does happen to test positive.
Usually scares them right off.
If hired
>Haha you're fired.
Right to work state

>>129450493
In the interests of the, Preservation of Human Existence Sociaity, you are what we call a no-go.

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>>129450493
>assuming I don't identify as gender non-binary with he/him pronouns

>>129450493

Actually I identify as a Cambodian, and Cambodian law makes no provisions for me hiring you. If you can name one reason why I can't be a Cambodian but you can still be a woman, I'll hire you. Also, "you", is not my preferred pronoun, "Eternal God King" is, and as such you have been reported to the authorities for hate speech against eternal Cambodian God Emporers. Thank You for trivializing our struggle for equality.

>>129452862
> start fartin

>>129450809

that gives out free rides to leftists

>>129450493
sorry we're all muslims here

>>129450493
too late, I hired my Sonic OC yesterday.

What if I say that I was born male, but felt like I was a girl who wanted to be a heterosexual cisgendered male?

>>129454637
This so much.
>at party
>sjw bitch with a psych degree who thinks that makes her the smartest person in the room is trying to start arguements with assorted people so she can "win" by using jumbled half remembered psuedo-psychobabble she picked up in college
>ask her where she works
>used to be in americorps
>okay, so unemployed at current
>why dont you use your fancy degree to apply as an orderly or care-taker at the local mental hospital, they have high turnover and are always looking for employees
>pays $15 an hour entry level with your degree and you can work your way up into a real treatment personel position that pays bank
>did apply, got rejected "cuz muh mysogyny an opresshun, glass cielings! Patriarchy!"
>friend tells me later she applied and failed their drug screener

Wanna bet a good number of these snowflakes with college debt working minimum wage jobs are there just cuz they cant stop sucking on a bong long enough to pass a drug screener and land a real job in their field?

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>>129457784
>pseudo-psychobabble

>>129453317
underraped

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>>129450493
This is how we deal with LBGQTWTFBBQ here.

>>129450809
Cringe

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>>129457784
My ex had to use my moms piss to get her last job, she couldnt even use her own moms piss cuz it was full of illegal substances too!

>>129450493
Fuck off mate, you're mentally ill. WE need good decent workers here, not tards.

Smithers, unleash the hounds.

>>129450493
Those tricks dont work here, cause there are no jobs, at all.

I won't be surprised if these cry baby cucks try this shit at a job interview after uni. That is of course if they venture out of their little safe space long enough to face reality.

>>129450809
Get it España

>>129452553
No, no it isn't.

Quotas becoming illegal except as imposed a punishment for being found guilty of discriminatory business practices was a fundamental part of the civil rights movement.

This is exactly the sort of shit we go out of our way to disallow.

>>129450493
>*dabs*
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

>>129450809
ebic and original x D ;-)^_^(TT)=_=(+_+):-[B-):O:-*:-D:'(:-\O:-):-$

>>129452553
No, its actually what we headed away from. Affirmative action destroyed a lot of the civil rights movement's credibility and was finally admitted by liberals to cause more harm than good.

What was happening was universities and colleges that had very very high standards of acceptance were forced to take C and D students to fill the quotas. These students ended up in a place where they were incapable of performing the required course work and had to drop out, now worse off than before thanks to debt.

Hiring quotas also hurt buisinesses. Unqualified people made profits go down, which meant they hired fewer people and there were less jobs for the qualified minorities to apply for.

Hiring quotas demonstratably hurt minorities, and they finally admitted that in the early 80's and realised that if you want to help minorities you really need to focus on QUALIFYING THEM for college or a job. Just packing them into universities and jobs like sardines with zero ability to function in that environment just doesnt work. Even liberals know this.

Just cuz 10% of 20 somethings are very vocal about it doesnt mean we are going back to something that already failed miserably only 30 years ago.

Even if we did it wouldnt last long, as it would immiediatley begin failing again for the same reasons.

>>129452862
i don't see her in there but janelle monae can brap my path any day

The LGBT law requires us to EMPLOY LGBT personnel and we do. We don't need new hires on that basis.

Due to privacy laws I cannot tell you who the others are but I'm gay as the Ernst Rohm.

Now get out. You aren't hot and while I celebrate your right to be queer, you are tacky, homely and your absence of dignity is an example of everything bad about fagfaggotry. You are the gay equivalent of a fatass neckbeard wearing a Waffen SS uniform.

You fail as a faggot.

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>>129458216
>Sweden out of all nations calling anybody cringey

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>>129452439
>a normal homo? Like, on e that takes it in the ass but doesn't dress like a clown?
good luck finding that anon.

I don't have any previous employers, but I do have this youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-jqO9Is6DI

I hope that's ok!

>>129467371
>Ernst Rohm
Fucking twinks in a hotel bed when suddenly the fuhrer pops in and shoots you dead.

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>>129468124
(watches video of fat slob eating ice cream with hands)
youve got the job anon!

>>129450493
Pewdiepie's brother?

No (((positive))) discrimination in here. Thanks master Jussi Halla-Aho

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>>129450493
>sign myself up as a transgender lesbian
>double dose of diversity
>diversity achieved

You have an impressive resume but we've decided to persue other candidates.

>>129452523
IRELAND IS A FAG COUNTRY

>>129458354
>had to use my moms piss to get her last job,
>your mom gave it to her
>your ex got the job

what the fuck man, are you a cuck?

>>129450493
i'm gay, sweetie.

>>129450493
We do need a clown, but you'll be expected to work in full costume and makeup. The hair isn't enough.

>>129450493
>mullet
>needs more rainbow

>>129450493
I already have my wife's son who identifies as a boy working here.

>>129450493
congratulations! you're a janitor!

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>lurks

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>As per the rule of our dress code you are required to have undyed hair, if you are not willing to do this I will not hire you, this is not based on your sexuality but purely based on the fact you would be in violation of our dress code
wow that was easy.

>>129450493

Will you be bringing furries?

There's no need to assume a furry's gender when they're giving you a blow job.

>>129450842
Mike "Watt Watt in the Butt" Pence
Mike "Electrocute the Fruits" Pence
Mike "AC/DC if you're LGBT" Pence
Mike "The destroyer of dykes" Pence
Mike "LGBT OMG WTF BBQ" Pence
Mike "If you think gay sex is divine, you can dine on my nine" Pence
Mike 'Gas the Gays' Pence
Mike "If you like the cock you get the shock" Pence
Mike "Slay the gay " Pence
Mike "For your cock-itch here's some shockwave" Pence
Mike "Shoot Every Queer Into The Stratosphere" Pence
Mike "Lick dick and you get the static prick" Pence
Mike "Vice President Electric" Pence
Mike "Taze the rainbow" Pence
Mike "One watt for every impure thought" Pence
Mike "An ampere a day keeps the gay away" Pence
Mike "Bum-driller killer" Pence
Mike "LGBTBBQ" Pence
Mike "Turning fruits into vegetables" Pence
Mike "Resistance is futile" Pence
Mike "Electro-magnetic pulse nightclub" Pence
Mike "One in five won't survive" Pence
Mike "Alternating current for alternative lifestyles" Pence
Mike "Cure the queers with volts over amperes" Pence
Mike "Whether you catch or pitch, I'm flipping the switch" Pence
Mike "Faggot medicine from Thomas Edison" Pence
Mike "Like other men? The dial's going to ten" Pence
Mike "Soap dropper? Meet live copper" Pence
Mike "Like it in the crapper? Get the zapper" Pence
Mike "2 girls, 1 switch" Pence
Mike "think men are cute? electrocute" Pence
Mike "LGBT OMG WTF BBQ" Pence
Mike "Putting Faradays in gays" Pence
Mike "Gay 2: Electric Boogaloo" Pence
Mike "Jolting fear into the queer" Pence
Mike "Raining men with chlorine" Pence

>>129450493
M8, according to my university scholarship applications I'm gay, Jewish and Aboriginal (and getting 8k/year for it). If you think I wouldnt call myself a masculine presenting lesbian woman of colour to maintain the efficiency of my company then you are sorely mistaken.

>>129450493
"I see you've applied for the "jizz mopper" position. You're overqualified but seeing as you're the only applicant for the position you're hired!"

>>129450493
>glasses
>weak jaw
>is a faggot
His Grandpa should of died in the War.

>>129472009
most of these were pretty meh

I can see why they weren't included in the video