ITT: stupid things you did when you were a noob >lubed my

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>first time doing dirt jumps innawoods
>having good time
>get confident
>panic mid jump
>hold front brake
>FFF

also I used to lube my cassette too

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>dropped in 3 times on a 5 foot
>fuck yeah I got this
>tried to drop in on a 7 foot
>fucked my hand up for 6 weeks

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>mfw I once put grease on my seatpost

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used wd40 on my chain

Purchased the most beefiest, softest gel seat to make long off-road rides more comfortable.
>I wonder if its blood or sweat dripping down the inside of my leg..

Currently a noob

Sold my cracked hard tail for $300 instead of finding a new frame. Could of had a really nice steel mtn bike for cheap

I wore a helmet a few times.

Didn't buy a pair of proper padded shorts or attempt to find a saddle that fitted me well for years. I don't know why I punished my taint like that.

>>1064791
Probably would have encountered several compatibility issues

asked for bike advice on /n/

I used to pump my 23c CST tyres over 130 psi. I created a couple times because of the lack of grip a couple of times before realizing that I was pumping them way over the limit.

>>1064786
Holy shit. I've never understood what causes this, but my Chinese no-padding saddle is the comfiest I've ever owned.

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Put something like this pic on an xc hardtail.

I tried to do a 1-handed u-turn with a phone in my hand.

>>1064857
Everyone makes this mistake exactly once.

Practiced my no-hands cornering. Got 6 stitches in my chin for that one.

Turned my bike upside down to do work on it

Didn't change my chain for the first 10 months, toasted not only my cassette but my my chainring was toast too

Wore jeans

>>1064877
>wearing down your drivetrain in 10 months

I cast doubt.

>>1064883
It was entry-level Shimano 2300, which I never cleaned. I've since upgraded to 105.

>>1064776
You are supposed to do this though, assuming the seatpost and frame are both metal (if one or both is carbon, use fiber grip/carbon paste instead)

>>1064857
I have done so multiple times and never received bad advice.
>>1064858
>I created a couple times because of the lack of grip a couple of times
English, nigger.
>>1064863
That's not a noob thing to do.

>>1064885
But entry level Shimano stuff is heat treated and painted mild steel.

It wouldn't wear out even if you went through chains.

The high end dura ace shit with tiatnium gears in the cassette are dependent on lubricant not so much the 2300 stuff that's meant to be stored outside and ridden rough

>>1064914
Nah, even at 105/ultegra level, cassettes barely last for 2 chains, max. Chainrings last longer than that, and will keep functioning a long time, but it ruins the durability of your other components to use worn-out chainrings. It was toast.

>>1064877
>turned my bike upside down to work on it
I lay my bike down on a mat or sheet of cardboard to do maintenance and have zero issues.

>>1064731

I lubed my chains with Park Tools grease for years lol

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>>1064908
>I have done so multiple times
>never received bad advice.
>not a noob thing to do.

>>1064960
Okay so you know literally everything there is to know about bicycles? Neat.

>>1065110
Are you literally retarded or why do you not see that any such thing was not in any way implied but only that seeking education on 4chan is a stupid thing to do?

>>1065118
You're the literally retarded one you fucking moron.

>>1064777
still do, still don't give a fuck.

>>1064867
the only noobish thing is not succeeding at this with ease

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>>1065121
>literally retorts 'no u'
You can't even make this shit up.

>>1065144
NO U

>>1064908
I meant "crashed*. Sorry my autocorrect is a nigger, nigger.

>>1065265
nigger

bought new pads for cantilever brakes. didn't help for shit. replacing them with v brakes was the solution.

>tfw commute with my bike every day since last june when i regularly started doing it
>really have no idea how to maintain it or anything like that
>everything i do is probably stupid noob shit like how i lube it, the saddle height and type, etc

What's wrong with lubing the cassette?

>>1065990
It accomplishes literally nothing beneficial, and it just makes the cassette get dirty (and therefore makes your drivetrain components wear out faster).

>>1064776
You're supposed to you autist, unless one is carbon

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>fucking clipless on a singletrack above a creek
>cant unclip left foot and fall 6 ft into water
>dogwalker plebes see me and laugh
flat pedals from then on

>>1066003
>>1064907
>part that's not supposed to be moving
>YO PUT LUBE ON IT
Holy shit /n/ is fulla fags.
Where else should I put lube, my [spoiler]bum hole[/spoiler]?

>>1066023
You put grease in the down tube so the seatpost won't seize up after a while. How new are you to bicycles?

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>>1065976
but anon, v brakes are a type of cantilever brakes

simplified for bike
>pivot point under pads = cantilever
>pivot point above pads = caliper

rim brake pads mostly differ due to material and manufacturing quality

>>1066010
bu.. but.. muh upstroke power

>>1064908
>>1065265
>>1065969
>>>/pol/

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>>1064908
>That's not a noob thing to do.

I'm still a noob tbqh, I thought bikes didn't need any maintenance besides lubing the chain.
I thought the more lube the better, and that a nice greasy and blackened chain was a healthy chain.
Rode on under inflated tyres for years. Etc. etc.

>>1064731
I still do that.

It's not really a noob thing but I've destroyed lots of bikes riding them through the winter. just an unavoidable effect of road salt.

my rims have a very short life from braking with dirt on pads, so do chains and cogs (single speed in winter)

I can't fully avoid rust but I brush it off as it occurs, still nothing lasts long.

I basically get 2 winters out of each beater. I wish it was more but I can't figure out how to make them last.

>>1066010
lol
Once I was riding the river bottoms and there was a little stream that I tried to ride across but it was more deep/abrupt angles so I fell over onto the mud and people saw
>>1066023
Grease, not lube, you blind fucking idiot. It's so that the seatpost doesn't bond with the seattube. Fuck, you're an idiot (or a troll, in which case 8/10).
>>1066029
>in the down tube
fullretard.jpg
>>1066046
>>>>reddit
>>1066093
Then you're an idiot. Congrats.

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>>1066052
>, and that a nice greasy and blackened chain was a healthy chain.

>>1066101
What breaks down other than the chain, cogs, cables, rims, and pads? I'm going on 5 years strong on my commuter, ive gone through lots of those 4 items but only replaced the BB and headset once each. Can't think of anything else that would need replacing.

>>1064731
fell for the clipless meme

>>1066163
>seatpost doesn't bond with the seattube.
Wait, really? I've never heard of this. Are you taking about a mountain bike with suspension in the seat post!

>>1066884
Mountain bikes do not have suspension in their seatposts, and no, I am not talking specifically about suspension seatposts (nor specifically about dropper posts). I am talking about seatposts in general.

>>1067063
well my carbon seatpost is likely riined by now. never greased it

>>1064877
>turned my bike upsidedown to work on it
Am I missing something because I've been doing this for at least 10 years.

>>1067129
Pro tip: get a work stand. So much better for all types of maintenance.
If you dont have a work stand, prop it up using the brake hoods and front wheel as a tripod and lean it against a wall. Whatever you do, for the love of god do not let the seat touch the ground.

>>1067133
>do not let the seat touch the ground.
why?

>>1067140
>>do not let the seat touch the ground.
>why?
Why indeed?
I do this all the time, 8 years and 50,000 miles so far.
I do have a work stand for real maintenance and such at home, but in the field I always change flats by flipping the bike upside down.
It will scratch up the "toenails" on the shifters, but luckily I'm heterosexual and just don't care.

>>1067140
>>1067152
Think of every putz you've seen changing a tire on the side of the road with their bike flipped over. That is what you look like. Inverting the bike is a grave disrespect.

>>1067157
no, you're just obsessive-compulsive.

and probably a fag.

Besides lubing all the drivetrain (least without wd40, though I don't understand why that's bad) I got my first decent bike (specialized mtb) a couple of inches too tall for me. Rather two inches above my recommended frame size, so while my feet can still touch the floor, they're not doing it flat and when sitting on the top tube my crotch rests just slightly against it. This is also after I've adjusted the seat to the lowest position possible and I'm now looking into how to adjust the stem to be lower because I'm concerned about my posture. Not that riding like this is particularly uncomfortable because it's really not. But because I noticed that every other cyclist has their bikes with the saddle above the handlebar height and their posture is different, which I assume increases performance. Whereas my saddle is slightly under my handlebar's height. Unfortunately I'm dirt poor and the bike was too great a steal to pass up and I've grown quite fond of it so I'm not exactly eager to keep looking around craigslist for something my size but, should I be concerned? Aesthetics and slight loss in performance aside, are there any harmful side-effects to using a bike that's a little too big?

>>1067122
READ THE PREVIOUS FUCKING POSTS. YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO GREASE A FUCKING CARBON SEATPOST.

Metal seatpost + metal seattube = grease
Carbon seatpost + metal seattube = fiber grip
Metal seatpost + carbon seattube = fiber grip
Carbon seatpost + carbon seattube = fiber grip
(fiber grip is also known as carbon paste)

>>1067295
>wd40, though I don't understand why that's bad
Because it's not really a lubricant, it will just dry out your chain
>bike too big
You won't have as good of bike handling/control, you'll get sore, you'll develop bad form, and you'll look like a faggot. If none of that bothers you go ahead and ride oversized bikes. My only bike for a few years was too big for me, I still have it and ride it occasionally.

>>1067298
I ended up using a bottle of PTFE 3 in 1 oil I had lying around. Hope it does the job. So far I think it handles well enough, and I'm a manlet so I already look like a faggot regardless. I'd like to assume I can fix my form when/if I eventually upgrade bikes if I decide I really love cycling (and I'm definitely enjoying it so far), but so long as I won't get like a fucked up spine or knee joints long term from an oversized bike, I'll just chug on along for a good while longer with this one.

>>1067302
>but so long as I won't get like a fucked up spine or knee joints long term from an oversized bike,
I didn't, doesn't mean you won't. I guess I'd ride it and if it started causing soreness or feeling like a potential onset of injury then reconsider.
If you decide to look into a better/more fitting mountain bike at some point, pinkbike.com/buysell is a great place to buy used mountain bikes. Craigslist is nice for old 70s-90s bikes, i.e. a bike for commuting, but if you want a mountain bike that will perform well on singletrack etc, you're better off with something more modern and that's better found on pinkbike.

>>1067296
Fiber grip is grease with a friction agent. As long as your garbon:DD post stays up without excessive clamp pressure - grease is perfectly fine. If it slips, well, get some friction paste. Alu and garbon:DD in contact forms a galvanic current that corrodes the aluminium, so there must be some form of grease applied no matter how you do it. Or you will eventually crush the post or crack the seat tube from the pressure of expanding aluminium oxide. Never mind ever doing height adjustments.

Gentlemen, grease your shafts.

>>1067304
Alright, thanks a bunch!

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>had a walmart mongoose mountain bike
>never understood what the twisty clicky thing on the handlebars did
>whenever i tried to use it it felt like the bike was falling apart so i never shifted gears again
>tires were both constantly losing air
>had a full sized pump wrapped onto top tube with a belt
>understood what inner tubes were but had no concept of how to use tools or take off a wheel
>attempted to fix front brakes with pliers once and destroyed them
>chain was falling off every other day
>this happened once while crossing major intersection from crosswalk
>never once took the bike off the sidewalk
>despite all this I still rode it to work every day for two years

After I graduated high school and quit my job it rotted in the backyard until a hurricane finished it off.

>>1067328
Dude Walmart bikes were indestructible.

If you treat a dura ace equipped carbon bike like how people treat Walmart bikes.... You'd have high end bike parts littered in sidewalks across America.

>Riding bmx to friends house

>Jump off of it and slam it into his drive way and leave it there for 4+ hours to go inside to play Playstation

>>1067296
Carbon on titanium?

>>1067305
>grease is perfectly fine.
No it's literally not, standard grease can (CAN, not always will) damage carbon fiber.
FIBER
GRIP

>>1067328
>>attempted to fix front brakes with pliers once and destroyed them
I fucking lol'd

>>1067334
FIBER GRIP

>>1064731

> stripped threads on a pedal
> pedal wiggles out while riding
> replace crank arm with one that is the wrong size
> ride 175 x 170mm cranks for a year without noticing

> lude chain with GREASE for 3 years of daily commuting "why is my chain so dirty??"

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>>1067490

>>1064731
>strip threads of one of these shity alumium things
>replace it but then mount the derailleur at a wrong angle
>wonder why derailleur is hitting the chainstays
>crash two times because the chain derails while pedaling strong
>front wheel is wobblig causing extinctive wear on the disk brakes

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>>1067604
forgot pic

I bought road shoes for a road bike. I got tired of walking like a pengwin and two months ago I bought mtb pedals with stiff carbon shoes that allows me to walk better and I have no hot spots on 80km+ rides.

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>>1066052
>a nice greasy and blackened chain was a healthy chain

>>1067673
Jewish propoganda is far-reaching, anon

I got mountain bike shoes and road pedals and didn't get why they didn't clip in but I rode that way anyway for like 3 months with mtb cleats and speedplays (got speedplays used so they had no cleats)

>Getting some water before I plan to sprint up this climb
>It's raining outside
>Miss bottle cage and drop bottle on streak
>Unclip my right foot
>Come to a near complete stop
>Try to do a sharp left U-Turn

I did a 40 mile ride and thought it was long and thought it was a significant accomplishment

Of course that's when I was like 15 and was riding a BSO

>>1064731
>lubed my cassette with chain lube every time I lubed my chain
>didn't wipe down my chain after lubing it
What's wrong with that?

>>1067979
It offers no benefit (lubing a chain is to get lube into the internals of the chain, not to have a wet outside) and attracts contaminants (dirt, dust, etc), causing your drive train components to wear our prematurely.

I wore a helmet once

>>1069731
Lol you would

>>1064791
>Could of

>>1069766
Nice dubs

>>1064767
I feel bad for uncoordinated people

>>1067063
Suspension seat posts may be stupid in terms of efficiency but they're pretty nice when your commuting over rough stuff on a cx bike

>>1067296
What 'grease' are you supposed to use? I need to get some.

>>1067903
I went for a ride with someone the other day and they wanted to turn back after about 5 miles. Pushed them to 15. They have no confidence in their ability.

>>1072729
White lithium grease is the typical do-it-all bike grease. Campagnolo sells (or sold?) a good one if you want full nerd points, but any will do.

>>1067296
Metal seat post + carbon seat tube
Tell me this isn't a thing.

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>long shoelaces
>shoelaces hook on pedal and wrap around crank
>stop at intersection and try to step off pedal
>teeter in front of a bunch of cars and then fall over
>pull foot out of shoe and walk bike with dangling shoe across crosswalk in front of huge line of cars
>it starts raining

>>1072788
It could be a thing. Why not?
>>1072729
Bicycle grease. Same kind you use in bearings. Same kind you use on bolts. I like Phil Wood grease.

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>>1072726
>but they're pretty nice

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>>1073350

>>1064731
Listen to the group think....I listened and bought the "best" bottom bracket bb30

Creaks like a motherfucker needed special tools.

Went back to 68mm threaded because it worked fine for me. Before.


Now everyone is telling me I'm an idiot because I don't want a disc brake road bike.

Dual pivot work fine for me. I don't need disc stopping power on a 3/4" bike wheel.

I don't need 6-piston calipers off a Dodge viper for a 13lbs road bike.


Everyone tells me I need to stop what I'm doing and buy carbon right this second....well titanium an aluminum works fine for me.... carbon warranties are only 5-6 years while aluminum is my lifetime

>>1072729
If you're not using carbon- any grease. RJ the bike guy uses marine blue grease for its water repellant properties, so you might as well go with that.
I just bought the cheapest grease I could in a small tube.
If you have any carbon parts then you need special carbon-friendly grease, but if not, it really doesn't matter. Lithium, copper, whatever.

Rode with my seatpost slammed into the seat tube for most of my primary schoold and some high school.

Then I borrowed a friend's bike once, who had the correct height and it felt like floating on pillows. Might've got something to do with the mushrooms we took though.
Immediately raised my seat post after that night. So much so that it fell out the next day and I crashed.

>>1073835
My first bike had the seatpost seize (rusted..) a low position so it was a pain to ride. Didn't help that it was a 20kg supermarket piece of shit but whatever.

Now I'm riding a real bike at a proper height and it's fantastic.

In 1997 I spent 270$ from my paper route on a Schwinn frontier, I loved that bike. I never did the slightest thing to maintain it and after 10 years it was unrideable due to the free hub bit slipping.
LBS told me it wasn't worth fixing, I looked for the closest thing to a replacement to a rigid which I decided was a rigid hybrid but I always hated the skinny tires.

Now I'm riding a rigid 97 Gary fisher

>things I did as a noob.

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>>1067295
get a short stem OR use a standard 30-70degree swept back bars upside down - the bars will be lower and closer to you.
such bars are cheap and often available used; alloy and steel are both fine and can even be obtained for free at scrapyards and dumpsites

>>1073350
Been there

Also
>going to cabin innawoods
>put bike on bike rack
>worry about the derailleur/chain getting everything greasy
>wrap derailleur in old sock
>satisfaction.jpg
>stop at grandparents on the way, feel like stretching legs on the bike
>take bike off rack, take my first pull
>there's a lot of resistance, and then no resistance, freewheeling
>derailleur ate the sock, jammed and got ripped clean off
>I aint got no satisfaction.jpg

Another one
>lubing chain with copious quantities of plain engine oil
>oil drips on rim
>no biggee, just wipe it off
>rear brakes are now glass

>>1073827
You ride 19mms?

>>1073829
>RJ the bike guy uses marine blue grease for its water repellant properties, so you might as well go with that.
Phil Wood makes waterproof bicycle grease
>>1073835
>So much so that it fell out the next day and I crashed.
lol
>>1073836
>20kg
wew

>>1064731
>cleaned and lubed my chain with wd40
>got some on the rear disk for good measure

>>1074152
Nice going

>>1072788
it is a thing, the carbon supposedly dampens vibration

>>1077626
Neat! I'm gonna go put a titanium seatpost on my carbon road bike frame! Do you think it will ride nice and damply?

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>>1064731
Literally happened today:
>Go to a bike mechanic for chain replacement
>"anon, when was the last time your chain was replaced?"
>"I dunno. 3-4 years maybe?"
>End up having to replace my rear cassette and
half of crankset

I bought a $50 maxxis dhr tire and put it on the front of my bike.

i spent $2k on a carbon fully that i use to go to the liquor store.

>>1080511
Fully as in full suspension? Please tell me it was a 200mm dh rig so I can laugh even harder.

>>1079756
>rear cassette
>as opposed to front cassette
But yeah don't do that. Stop by a LBS every 500 miles or so and ask them to measure your chain for stretch. Once it hits 0.75%, replace it. Or buy yourself one of these: https://www.amazon.com/Park-Tool-Chain-Checker-CC-2/dp/B00ZUMA79C

>>1079756
why do people do this?

>bike rides 100% fine

>little bit of surface rust on chain

>panic, take it into a bike shop $85/hour just to look at it/diagnose it, $35 for a new chain, $40 labor

>when was the last time you changed it?

>no matter what the answer is, they always respond with "OH MY GOD YOU NEED A NEW CASETTE AND CHAIN RINGS RIGHT HTE FUCK NOW OR YOUR BIKE WILL EXPLODE!!!!" $250

>pfft clipless will be fine I won't fall off
>fell off on my fucking driveway before I'd even gone anywhere
>fell off again later and cut my knee, still have a small scar thing
>fell off in traffic because an allen key had come loose on one of my pedals and I could not get my foot out at all

Had about a 6 month break from cycling and now I want to get back into it, I'll have to learn how to do clipless all over again.

>>1080511
i'll buy it off you for $100

>>1081053
>I'll have to learn how to do clipless all over again.
unless you care about how much power you're putting down, no you don't
if you aren't comfortable using clipless pedals or just don't enjoy it as much with them get flats
decent mtb flats aren't that expensive and grip pretty well with good shoes
the only downside will be freds laughing at you, and slightly lower power output

>>1081053
So why didn't you practice getting your feet in and out before riding? Just prop yourself up and practice.

OVERGREASED EVERYTHING!!!!

>>1081110
This one never dies... Clipless is not really for power, it keeps your feet on the pedals in the correct position no matter the terrain and allows you to spin without your feet flying off the pedals.

>>1080596
Kek I got this same routine every time I took my bike in for a quick check up over the last 5-6 years & always refused & I've never had any problems with either, I that no I've had the same chain/cassette/chainring on for the last 8 years & basically just scrub the rust & gunk off with an old toothbrush & soak the cain in castrol gtx overnight if there's really stubborn shit all over it.

>>1081730
Clipless is for both power and stability. If you think being able to add power to the cranks over the whole rotation (instead of just pushing down) isn't a power-up, you're retarded.
Sure it's the pushing down is the highest portion of power with the biggest muscle groups but it's not your entire leg.

>>1081808
Also the soles of the shoes in clipless have a better platform to not lose any power applied

>>1066010
Fucking lol this is a good story