>I'm a music critic >I know all about music I'm

cause its hard

back seat drivers

That's like saying a coach should just play the sport him and stop telling other people how to play

>>73494977
>>73495006
You can lock yourself in a room for a year with a bunch of books and learn music theory, how to mix and do sound design and how to play an instrument or two and bam you've learned the language now SPEAK

Making music is way harder than forming a coherent critique of it. That being said most reviewers can't do either.

>>73495006
coaches are old and biology kicks in

its different in music, people don't become successful musicians when old because they have jobs/families and cant woodshed like an autist and established musicians become shit when older because they have people blowing smoke up their ass and they're too happy

>>73495075

yeah but most people prefer to be able to afford to eat more than ramen noodles

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>>73494962
Readers often ask me why I did not become a musician, since my essays, indirectly, tell a musician what music he should or should not be making. Other readers accuse critics of being merely frustrated people who would like to be the very musicians and stars they "criticize". Again, in my case it goes back to my passion for history and for knowledge. Pythagora, who had a mystic attitude towards things, thought that the audience was more important than the athletes: the athletes were entertaining the audience but the audience was "contemplating" the athletes, and to Pythagora that was more important. Understanding nature was more important than being a part of it. In a sense, when you "contemplate" nature you manage not to be part of it, to be something else, above and beyond it, almost divine. Pythagora thought that this "contemplation" of nature led to logic. To Pythagora religion and mathematics were the same: the pure mathematician was a religious prophet, and viceversa. Contemplation was the key to understanding the universe, and it led to logical explanation of what the universe is. Logic was so ubiquitous in the universe that Pythagora thought that numbers were the ultimate reality. In particular, he discovered the relationship between numbers and music. Music is logic. All of this was evident to him as the "listener", not as the "maker" of music.

>>73495229

based Scaruffi, inb4 "b-but muh emotion, muh feels, muh s-soul"

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>>73495191
I don't understand this shit

There are groundbreaking artists who are bordering illiteracy in terms of musical vocabulary and its really all just because they put in a bit of effort

It's literally all curation and taste with the only block being fluency in the manipulation of audio and musicianship

Music critics are seriously getting it wrong. The ability to point at sounds and say this is shit and this is good is the be all and end all and they're not even using that skill

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YOU DON'T BELIEVE WHAT YOU WRITE
YOU'RE AN IMPOSTER

>>73495265
>There are groundbreaking artists who are bordering illiteracy in terms of musical vocabulary and its really all just because they put in a bit of effort
Like Grimes. Hard work and talent are required.

>highly opinionated about music
>can't even play an instrument let alone compose
Fuck outta here.

>>73495390

>highly opinionated about movies
>has never directed/acted in/written a film

>highly opinionated about food
>isn't a chef in a restaurant

>highly opinionated about literature
>isn't a published author

you get the point

>>73494962
Everyone's a critic. However, some people are much better at forming well thought out and interesting opinions. Others are even better at putting these opinions into words. Hence why they get hired by publications to review music for a living.

That being said professional critics are completely unnecessary in today's world.

>i listen to music that i think sounds good
well, if you know what music sounds good why don't you go make your own you lazy shit??????????

Because I don't have the motivation to learn an instrument and I have a gross nasally voice

The value of art depends on the values of the art critic.
Most art is born as imitation, not innovation.
The critic, not the artist, is the one who defines innovation, and rates it.
The artist is merely a vehicle for the aesthetic/ideology of the critic.
The critic is the real artist.

>>73495790
>I have a gross nasally voice

>What is EQ
>What is learning how to sing in a certain way

>>73494962
I'm trying anon
I can't write lyrics for shit but the moment I get a grasp on it I'm gonna make it

Good critic: identifies what the album is attempting to accomplish, rates it based on how much it succeeds on its own premise.

Shit critic: see anything written by Christgau.

>>73496416
Christgau does a decent critique if likes an album, if he doesn't it's ersatz shit and makes his ears bleed

>>73496267
>EQ is gonna fix a shit performance
Lol

>>73496204
this, but unironically
perception is everything