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Emperor of Sand is the VH1 version of Through Silver in Blood. Mastodon are not a poorly-done, warmed over Today is the Day or Iron Monkey; Mastodon are the type of lame sing-along lite rock that can otherwise be found on the heavier Motley Crue LPs. The closest comparison I can think of would actually be the speed metal influenced Skid Row – Slave to the Grind but Mastodon have more estrogen in their bloodstream. Medical literature reports that listeners testicles retreat into the body cavity upon hearing the opening riff. To make a Mastodon album one must merely kidnap five relatively sane sludge metal fans in Neurosis t-shirts, inject them with potent cocktails of various benzodiazepines, and buy them an afternoon of studio time. Emperor of Sand is what would result. Mastodon were not a band who wanted to kill everyone like Eyehategod in 1993, rather they were the assholes in Animal House with the acoustic guitar attempting to make Progressive Sludge Metal music a few years later for born again Christians. Mastodon are the 21st century Stryper.
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>>71712525
What album review did this pasta come fromB
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>>71712525
the last 2 sentences of this review make no sense
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>>71712525
Cool opinion.
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it kind of just lists insults like a roast and avoids building too much on any points. nice try though kiddo
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you now remember "cool story bro"
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>>71712702
they sound like something id read on 420chan
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>>71712702
>>71713914
IIRC it's a copypasta from Death Metal Underground and was originally about some glam band.
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>>71714056
it was about the jester race
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>>71714122
Ah, yeah, you're right. I just lump glam, melodeath and everything else I don't like into a category called "shit" and then forget about it.
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Stale pasta aside, can we have an honest discussion about this album? I'm kinda feelin it. Most of the tracks sound closer to Andromeda than they do Show Yourself, which is all I really wanted. It's good.
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>>71715237
Yea I'm liking it a lot. I like the new sound that Once more Round the sun introduced. Glad they realized that The Hunter was ass
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>>71715317
>The Hunter was ass
get out.
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About to listen to it now, lads. I find Mastodon albums comfy as fuck. They are one of my favorite bands (if not my favorite sludge/prog-metal group in general)
They keep a consisting level of quality to all their work. Pure comfort. I think they maybe have one really shit album for me, out of their entire collection.
They are a band that legitimately makes me excited about modern music again.
Thread posts: 14
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