>be me >sister admired because she can move a huge ball

She had it coming.
She only had herself to blame.
If you'd have been there
If you'd have seen it
I bet you you would have done the same.

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>be me
>princess sends me some stupid bullshit
>do the stupid bullshit
>fuck up
>fix fuck up
>get wings
>mfw

>>30570682
I appreciate this post.

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>>30570678
>be me
>come to podunk town out in the middle of the sticks
>do my usual show with my typical showboating
>it's just a persona, but it gives ponies the urge to one up me
>to which I humiliate them a bit
>... okay maybe I enjoy it a bit too much but really what's the harm?
>some ponies come up to my stage thinkign they can outshine me and I give them the usual treatment
>dragon heckles me in the crowd and keeps trying to get one of their unicorn friends to go up to the stage
>she refuses
>later that night
>some colts who watched my show decided it would be a great idea to bring a real life Ursa to the town
>everyone keeps expecting me to do something about it
>I do my best but I'm just a stage magician
>my wagon (and home) gets smashed along with all my possessions
>eventually unicorn from earlier shows up and puts the Ursa to sleep
>apparently that was a BABY
>HOW BIG DO THEY GET?
>anyway, apparently two colts bringing a fucking astral baby bear is somehow my fault and I get run out of town
>I bet that Unicorn bitch is somehow behind this

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>>30570692
>be me
>main characteristic is that I'm sexy
>was a good babysitter because I was sexy
>laid future princess' brother because I was sexy
>got an overblown parasite jealous because I was sexy
>first pony to give birth to alicorn because I was sexy
>am the posterfilly for roleplay threads because I'm sexy
>feels good mare

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>Be me
>And I as well
>One day we happened on a crowed that needed to be quelled.
>Thankfully for them, and us, it gave us the key.
>Not a scam, nor a heist, but simple opportunity.
>Our wager was meager, the bet was made.
>Dear brother I say we almost had it in spades.
>Now I won't point hooves at who caused our calamity, but I think we know who was to blame.
>I don't recall what you are speaking about brother, we we're merely off our game.
>Just like with the tonic?
>We, let me remind you made quite the profit...
>Enough of the past, in the end we did in the end pull off a good con.
>Yes, even helped two fillies learn the ropes to help us take down a don.

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>be me
>come from poor family in phillydelphia living mostly of aid from the equestrian government
>one day I see a parade with ponies dressed in bright golden armor with ponies cheering at the sight of them
>dream of one day being a royal guard when I grow up
>after years of saving up bits I move to Canterlot for a chance to enlist
>spend weeks training before i realize they are mostly ceremonial
>closest thing to heroics we get is night watch in the castle or sneaking a peek at the Princesses flank
>come to find out we used to have lots of heroic encounters and events
>now six young mares do all the saving and adventuring
>the royal guard is now no more than overpaid security monitors
>find out your dream is a lie
>find out you are essentially in the same position you were as a child
>why even live?

>>30570678
She had to fall to lose it all.
In the end it doesn't even matter.

This shits great

>>30571071
6.794/10

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>be me
>run into some conflict between two other ponies
>try to use magic to solve it
>it kinda works at first
>but then backfires and really fucks shit up badly
>panic like a retard while trying to fix it
>bailed out by someone else
>everything is fine
>nobody blames me for fucking everything up
>and then I repeat this whole process in the next episode focused around me
>mfw

>>30570678
>also has better hair

Nope

>>30572600
I was sleepy...

>>30570682
Shitposting with a dash of culture.
You're good, Anon.

>>30570678
>also has better hair
But that's not true!

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>>30571138
I feel bad for them desu

>>30570678
Sometimes it's better to be the underdog my dear princess.

>>30577621
m'lady

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>Be me.
>Just your average citizen of Ponyville.
>Make my living selling strawberries in the market.
>Or I would be if our little town wasn't getting attacked by monsters every other day thanks to the 'stars' of town.
>They are like a plague here, wherever they go disaster follows.
>Hear a knock on my door and wouldn't you know it, Rarity and her redneck friend Applejack.
>Rarity asks me what I think about apples.
>Setoventoburn.png.
>Start triggering the fuck out of Applejack, watching her become more and more furious as I ruin her in front of her friend.
>Close the door on them and feel better for the day.
>I fucking hate apples.

>>30570817
Tru dat

>>30577502
as do I

>>30572645
autism