Would a "hug the human" booth be successful in Canterlot

>>30105096
Maybe. It seems absurd in real life, but ponies are affectionate. Either way, I want this

>>30105096
>You scare them, repulse them, are just otherwise not something they want to interact with.
>Twilight wanted to change that
>She wanted to show them you were some scary monster.
>So she came up with this completely stupid idea.
>There you stand, like a moron, waiting for a pony to come hug you.
>The charge started out at 10 bits.
>Then when no one took the offer, Twilight lowered it.
>And again.
>And again.
>Now you're doing it for free
>Twilight keeps reassuring you it was just a matter of time.
>But still no one came.
>You were still standing there like a moron.
>The neutral face hiding even more neutral feelings.
>And also despair.
>Then Twilight came up with another idea.
>She had Pinkie come over and hug you, surely if she would everyone else would see you were ok, right?
>Wrong.
>Pinkie tried, but no one cared, because she hugs everyone.
>She tried having her other friends do it, but they all left with some excuse or another.
>Except Spike.
>He just said no.
>A random pony asked Twilight why she didn't hug him, but she ignored him and kept promoting the spectacle.
>Finally, Pinkie had had enough and came up with a different approach.
>Instead of charging them, she made a wager that no one could hug you for more than 3 seconds.
>Her wager was a free dessert of their choosing from the bakery.
>It was...actually kind of clever.
>Sad too.
>She was trying to use reverse psychology, and it seemed to be working.
>Ponies were stopping now.
>But still, none would take her up on it.
>Then a pony bet his friend to do it.
>There was a group of them, and they all pitched in to try and encourage him to do it.
>Pinkie included her offer, but the stallion was still hesitant.
>The crowd grew, and suddenly more ponies pitched into the pot to get him to do it.
>The pot was huge now, easily 200 bits if not more.
>Twilight extended the offer to anyone, she would see the pot and double it.
>This was getting out of hand.

>That mare will never walk into your small business
>She will never happily ask you for your service
>You will never lay down on your cuddling bed and wait for her to crawl besides you, into your arms
>She will never snore softly as you pet her mane
>She will never pull you back to bed when you try to sneak off for the rest of the time
>You will never crawl back and stroke her mane
>You will never accidentally fall asleep
>She will never be the big spoon and pet you wile you rest.

>>30105356
dued MOAR

>>30105356
what happens next

File: images.jpg (8KB, 306x164px) Image search: [Google]

8KB, 306x164px

>>30105356

>>30105356
I want moar

>>30105096
No, canterlot ponies have standards

>>30105096
I might write something tomorrow.
>>30105356
You need to continue

>>30105356
You cant just give a taste and stop anon!!!!
MOAR

>>30105662
Why even live.

File: 1468081192134.png (770KB, 752x625px) Image search: [Google]

770KB, 752x625px

>>30105356
>ponies have to be 200 bits or possibly double that plus a free desert of their choosing from SCC just to hug you
fuck

File: 857402.png (109KB, 749x440px) Image search: [Google]

109KB, 749x440px

>>30105096
I think Celestia would end up hogging it in Canterlot.

>>30105662
It feels is real

>>30105356
We still dead? Cause I'd like to see this through to its final stupidity

>>30105356
>By now the stallion looked like a million thoughts were running through his head.
>You're still not quite sure how much the now 500 bit pot could last an individual, but it sure seemed like a lot.
>Because he was slowly approaching you.
>The crowd was cheering him on.
>You weren't sure what to think or do at this point
>You haven't uttered so much as a word up until now.
>Maybe they would soften up if you also tried encouraging him.
>This whole thing was utterly retarded, but it's far too late to just back out.
>Admittedly even you're curious to see if he'll do it.
>He's within a few feet of you, so you make eye-contact with him.
>This causes him to freeze.
>The crowd makes a sudden shift, and a few gasps are heard.
>Good Lord were you really this intimidating to them?
>Sure you weren't much to look at back on Earth, but at least you showered daily.
>Alright maybe try coaxing him and not just stand there like a creepy statue.
>You make your best effort to smile at him.
>But it's a painful, awkward smile.
>He stutters steps back to a sitting position and his ears go flat.
>Seriously?
"Uh... it's ok, you can do it?"
>That's the breaking point for him
>He shakes his head and repeats a few 'nopes' in retreat.
>The crowd groans in disappointment.
>Twilight, who went from a bright, ever-so-hopefull smiles lowers her ears and frowns.
>A few more ponies join in with the crowd, and others pass off what's going on to them, and they throw in more bits.
>With each clang of coin, your self-esteem drops another notch.
>Which by now you'd have to start digging to see.
>Another challenger appears.
>A cute little mare with a lot of spunk.
>She seemed very confident she could do it.
>Until she got within a foot of you.
>You held your arms out to try and ease her into a hug.
>She yelped and tripped over herself trying to get away.
>The crowd laughed at this.
>"Everypony stand back, the Great and Powerful Trixie will show all of you how to hug a beast!"
>Well, shit.

File: 1368672922239.gif (920KB, 375x260px) Image search: [Google]

920KB, 375x260px

>>30108746
Aw shit, nigga

File: 1446058932247.jpg (114KB, 747x853px) Image search: [Google]

114KB, 747x853px

>>30105356
>>30108746
Jesus christ that poor anon.

>>30108746
>Trixie Lularoo
>No wait those were leggings.
>Trixie, her name is Trixie.
>You know of her.
>You've seen her show a few times.
>From a distance of course.
>When you asked Twilight about her, oh did she have some stories to tell you.
>Frankly you found her charming.
>And considering how she used to live, this chunk of change was too much for her to pass up
>"I have traveled all over Equestria, and have see everything there is to see. Nothing surprises Trixie, and she will claim those bits."
>Well, this is it, you'll finally get that hug that you didn't ask for.
>From Equestria's version of Mr. Satan.
>Maybe Twilight will finally leave you alone about this.
>Speaking of, she was rolling her eyes at the spectacle.
>You can make out her mouthing 'why her?'.
>But this was her idea and she knew it.
>Sort of.
>Trixie approached you and removed her hat and cape.
>As she started to size you up, that confidence seemed to waver, but then she looked back at the bits.
>"First, a stretch."
>Figures.
>Anything at all to draw this out.
>You hesitantly start to bring your arms up again while she's busy stretching.
>Out of the corner of your eye you catch Twilight and Pinkie frankly waving their hooves in a crossing fashion and shaking their heads.
>Your about to say something when they start flapping their hooves under their throat.
>Shut up and stand still.
>Right.
>You nod.
>Wouldn't want to blow this...whatever this is.
>The crowd is a bustle, encouraging Trixie, telling her she can do it.
>Although you catch one pair of ponies doing side bets whether or not you'll eat her as soon as she's close enough.
>Finally Trixie looks back to you, ready after some pointless stretches.
>"Alright you, prepare for the greatest and most spectacular hug anypony has ever seen!"
>She inches her way to your feet.
>She sits on her haunches and brings her forelegs out wide.
>And clasps your leg
>...For all one one-thousandth of a second, then releases triumphantly.
>The crowd boos.

Awww yeah
>>30108967

>>30108999
Wasted

File: qIe7gmr.jpg (83KB, 498x960px) Image search: [Google]

83KB, 498x960px

>>30108967
>Trixie manages to give him a proper hug
>After the fear subsides she realises it's just like any regular hug
>She hasn't gotten a hug in a long time
>pic related
I want this

>>30109074
>implying its not going to be the other way around.
When was the last time you recieved a hug that wasnt from a family member saying hello or goodbye.

>>30109074
>>30109092
writefag please?

>>30109074
>>30109092
>>30109102
That does sound pretty nice, doesn't it? How great would it be for her to have that experience? Or any of us for that matter?

>>30108967
>As the crowd lets her have it, she tries to rebuke them.
>"What are you all booing for? I hugged him and thus have conquered the monster!"
>'That doesn't count!' Twilight chimed in.
>'''Yeah! If I blunked I would've missed it! What kinda hug is that?!'''
>"Blunked isn't a word, Pinkie."
>'''YOU'RE NOT A WORD.'''
>'That so does count!'
>The crowd boos her and begins to chant 'doesn't count'.
>"The crowd has spoken, Trixie. You want those bits? You have to hold it for the count of five."
>'What?! That's ridiculous! Why don't you just ask me to move the sun and moon at the same time while you're at it!'
>OH COME ON.
>You really start to wonder if it's you, so you give yourself a quick whiff under your pits.
>You wince slightly and pretend you never did that.
>The heat, it's the heat's fault you've gotten a little sweaty.
>Not the crowd, shame, and embarrassment of all this.
>"Rules are rules, Trixie. What? I thought you've 'seen all Equestria has to offer.'"
>Twilight grinned.
>It's as if she completely forgot what this was all about and now she's just having fun at her expense.
>And yours.
>Everyone is egging her on now.
>You hear a few loud 'DO IT's.
>"Fine! Trixie will play by your rules!"
>She turns to look at you again, gritting her teeth.
>Then she screams, and charges in for the hug.
>Horn first you add.
>It jabs you right in the stomach.
>Now, while not sharp, it's still rounded enough to be quite uncomfortable.
>And it's long enough that it actually feels like it poked your stomach.
>Which leads to a chain of events in your bowels that eventually result in...
*Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt*
>There's a sudden hush over the crowd.
>You can't see Trixie's face, but if you could it'd look a lot like yours.
>And Twilight's
>Pretty much everyone else's.
>Horror.

>>30109092
Probably on my final day of school, the guy who I used to walk up to and from with gave me a hug and wished me good luck

File: 12345.jpg (51KB, 600x600px) Image search: [Google]

51KB, 600x600px

>>30109127
I hope this ends in suicide.

File: 1494795324244.png (317KB, 540x803px) Image search: [Google]

317KB, 540x803px

>>30109127

File: Uncomfortable guard.gif (11KB, 600x450px) Image search: [Google]

11KB, 600x450px

>>30109127

>>30109127
>What you relented was more than just a fart.
>It was an offensive fart.
>The kind of fart that makes people legitimately sad.
>The kind of fart that could start a war.
>It sounded like something you would hear on the Price is Right when a contestant loses.
>Every single pony in attendance breaks out into hysterical laughter.
>Including Twilight and Pinkie
>Your heart completely sinks.
>Trixie, while somehow still holding on, is trembling like a fucking leaf.
>A single tear dropping from her face.
>'WHY. AREN'T. YOU. COUNTING?!'
>"I...I'm so sorry! I'm t-t-trying HAHAHAHA."
>Finally, you hear the crowd begin to count.
>""One!""
>How did things get this bad?
>Where did you life go so wrong?
>""Two!""
>This poor girl.
>You felt just awful for her.
>Sure she put herself into this position for monetary reasons, but even she didn't deserve this.
>""Three!""
>Even you are bothered by the smell of what you've just done.
>This is inhumane.
>Somewhere right now a lot of people are really upset and they have no idea why.
>""Four!""
>Trixie's is practically yelling and crying at the same time.
>She isn't going to make it.
>""FIVE!!!""
>The crowd explodes into cheers.
>Trixie, still screaming, shoves herself off of you towards, the bits, and grabs them with her magic all while screaming and poofs herself away from the cheering ponies.
"I'm sorry! Good job!"
>You words were mere fluff at this point.
>As everyone tried to compose themselves again, the crowd slowly dispersed.
>Twilight came over to congratulate you.
>"Anon, that was...that was amazing. I'm sorry, I just...I can't stop laughing. Thank you for being such a good sport."
>'''Yeah you're the best!'''
>They were talking to an empty shell of a man at this point.
"Yeah well, you know me..."
>'''That was so much fun, we should do that again!'''
>"Oh Pinkie, we couldn't do that to him again, and where would we even get a crowd like that?"
>They freeze for a moment.
>"Canter-"
>'''lot!'''

>>30109198
>No
>Absolutely not.
>This was ridiculous.
>The sheer embarrassment you've just put yourself through, how could yo-
>Your thoughts are cut off by a few ponies walking up to you from the crowd.
>"Wow dude! That was the funniest thing I think I've ever seen in my entire life!" said a young stallion.
>'I haven't laughed like that in...I can't even remember!' quipped another mare.
>'''This was the greatest show ever, I hope you guys do this again.'''
>What is...
>What is wrong with everyone?
>How can they stand here around you an-
>Wait, they're standing around you.
>Smiling at you.
>They aren't scared at all anymore.
>Was it that easy?
"You're...you're not scared ?"
>'''No way! How could a big scary monster be that funny?'''
>"Exactly!"
>This isn't real.
>But the more you think about it, what does it matter?
>It took all this to break the ice, but is that so bad?
>Sure your self-esteem tanked
>But that's over-rated anyway.
>Twilight and Pinkie are looking at you smiling and expectant.
>And for the first time in a long, long time....
>You smile
"You know what? Let's do it."
>They both cheer and give you a group hug.
>Twilight of course minding her horn.
"But how are you gonna draw a crown like that in Canterlot?"
>"Oh don't you worry about that."
>'''Yeah I know a thing or two about bringing a crowd together.'''

End

Alright now get out

>>30109127
KEK

File: 256452462844.png (353KB, 972x601px) Image search: [Google]

353KB, 972x601px

>Trixie and Anon's hug is reduced to a fucking joke
THIS ISN'T THE STORY I WANTED, WRITEFAG!

File: 1133491.gif (261KB, 800x450px) Image search: [Google]

261KB, 800x450px

>>30109245
Beautiful.

>>30109352
I'd you don't like it, write your own.

>>30109352
>>30109102
>>30109092
>>30109074

You took their hopes and completely shit on them.

Bravo!

>>30109245
Not a bad ending, but...weak. It is weak, anon.
This shouldn't have resolved so quickly, and the HugAnon shouldn't have just gotten over it. It should have stung, and lingered, and had real satisfaction when the hug came about.

But it was good, and fun to read, and well-written! I believe in you, writefag.

File: When someone you trust touches you and you suddenly realize you've been starved for physical affection all your life.png (143KB, 392x995px) Image search: [Google]

143KB, 392x995px

>>30109074

>>30109596
>>30109074
So THAT'S where that comes from

>>30108746
Oh boy.

>>30109198
Anon chewing Twilight out for making her do 5 seconds when she did do the hug when.

>>30109245
Joy

>>30109938
Well the rules originally were to do it for 3 seconds, which Trixie didn't. But you could argue Twilight got a little greedy going for 5. Especially considering it was a 5 count, not 5 seconds.

>>30109198
>It sounded like something you would hear on the Price is Right when a contestant loses.

Alright that made me laugh

>>30110154
Oh your right it was 3 seconds. I missed that bit.

uhm

>>30109245
I was ready for feels. I was not ready for laughs.

hugasem

>>30113038
Wat?

>>30113042
Its when you hug a pony and it feels so good that they orgasm.

>>30113052
Oh. I thought that's when you have romantic feelings for Hugh Jackman

>>30109470
I thought it was a pretty good ending. It didn't have to be utterly tragic. Everyone thinking it was a show made a lot of sense, I thought.

Fun little story, writefag.

>>30113126
It wasn't meant to be some emotional tearjerker. There's too much of that sappy shit as it is. I just want crass and crude humor. Sometimes you just need a good fart joke.

>>30105096
Remember, they're little prey animals. Hugging is something pretty unique to apes and animals that've been domesticated by us; for many others, it's something the big bad predators come and do right before they snap your neck and start taking bites out of you.

Ever tried to hug a feral horse? It'll fucking bolt on you, with maybe a kick or two thrown in as well. You're better off with other gestures of affection, because having arms around their neck makes them feel trapped and fearful.

File: IMG_5931.gif (165KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]

165KB, 400x400px

>>30113205
Agreed. The fart that could start a war gave me a good kek.

File: 1343230813609.png (13KB, 498x450px) Image search: [Google]

13KB, 498x450px

>>30105356
>>Except Spike.
>>He just said no.
kek
this is why i like spike

this is exactly something he would do

>>30106899
Welcome to my life.

>>30109092
The difference between me and a cute little magical pastel pony is that I'm dead inside and she isn't.

>>30109245
If he's not even getting any satisfaction out of any of it, why the fuck doesn't he demand a cut of the profits? He could be making bank. If you're going to be alone for the rest of your life you might as well be rich and alone.

>>30109245

>"Hug the human" event in Canterlot.
>Guard ponies and Wonderbolts turn up, to test their courage.
>Aristocratic society shows up.
>Much amused by the spectacle.
>Princesses turn up.
>Shenanigans ensue.

File: 1393467207013.jpg (265KB, 890x850px) Image search: [Google]

265KB, 890x850px

>>30113701
>Celestia flat out wraps him in a full wing hug and cuddles him an entire ten minutes in front of everyone
>grabs the bit pot with her magic and flies back to the castle

>>30113747
She would, too.

>>30113747
>She buys cakes

hello

>>30113747
That bitch

File: 14129344846077.jpg (465KB, 632x632px) Image search: [Google]

465KB, 632x632px

>>30115807

>>30116125
Is she a reptile?

>>30113747
This bothers me and I don't know why

>>30116125
>scales
what the fuck

>>30116125
But why tho

>>30113747
>She grabs Anon too.
>According to some old Equestrian law, they are now married because of the 10 minutes of hugging.

>>30116488
>>30117312
>>30118083
Those are supposed to be feathers dumdums.
But feathers are super close to scales, that why they can look so much alike.

>>30113747
>>30118116
She donates the bits to a local orphanage

>>30118133
Why the fuck would she have feathers on her face you retard?

File: 1358637039073.png (3MB, 4000x4000px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 4000x4000px

>>30118772
Why are you so mad about this you turbo autist?
Why the fuck would she have wings you retard?
Do you know of any winged animal with fur?
Are you fucking stupid?
Maybe the artist just felt like it because he loves feathers
Who the fuck knows
fucking retarded piece of shit

>>30118784
No she might be a horse with wings but in no way would that out feathers on her face you fucking bowl of potato salad. End your gene pool

>>30118815
Go back where you come from /b/tard and ask them, I'm sure even they will be able to educate you on the subject.