The fact that my waifu isn't real makes me really sad. Like

>>29628670
You try adopting a dog To fill the void?

let her go anon, join the ascended and be free.

>>29628680
A dog won't make me smile smile smile

>>29628670
Being a brony makes your life like that.

>>29628670
step one: go to /gif/
step two: fap to a real girl
step three: your waifu is shit

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>>29628709
>3DPD
>No hooves
>Ever

>>29628670
That's natural.

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>>29628670
I know the feeling

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>>29628670
Get used to it. You're gonna feel that your whole life. Or at least until you forget and abandon her.

>>29628670
Being real is overrated, Anon. Be happy for her instead.

She gets to live in a world where the biggest moral dillemas they think about are friendship problems.

>>29628915
i'll never do that

But anon, she is real!

She exists in our hearts...

>>29629337
The ones that exist within our hearts are often the realest.

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>>29628670
It's for the best I think. I can't help but feel that me being with my waifu would just drag her down. It hurts, but I'll gladly endure the pain because she deserves the best.

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>>29628670
I prefer to think of it as some kind of greek tragedy.

>>29629337
so that's why my chest hurts s

>>29628670
Posting for pinkdog fag

>"No, Nonny. Not /that/. Wait here, it's easier to show you."
>She slips behind the counter, and pulls a tray from underneath it
>It has three identical cupcakes on it, all of them look delicious
>"See these three cupcakes? Take one!"
"For free?"
>You're not sure where she's going with this, but if you're getting a free cupcake you'll go wherever she damn well wants you to
>"On the house!"
>You shrug, and take a cupcake.
>Pinkie cocks her head
>"Why did you take that one?"
"Why this one in particular? I dunno, I just took one."
>"You had no reason? You took it at random?"
>You give a non-committal shrug
>Not really at random, but for the sake of the argument...
"Sure."
>Pinkie squints at the cupcake
>"You could have taken any one, but you took that one. That cupcake will get eaten, but its brother and sister get to live on."
>Uh...
"I guess?"
>"And there was nothing that cupcake could have done to avoid being eaten. It had no choice over being on the tray, on looking so delicious, on even being baked in the first place!"
>Pinkie's grin widens slightly
>"Its whole existence, from the moment it was created to the moment it was destroyed was completely outside of its control."
"You could say that, yeah."
>Pinkie nods sagely
>"It was born into this world alone, with nothing. Its whole existence was leading up to fulfilling a destiny it had no choice in, and then it'll be gone forever. Another couple of days, and we'll both have forgotten all about it!"

>>29628670
>Uh...
>Is Pinkie a nihilist?
"And you think it's like that for us?"
>She smiles
>"Whoa, Anon, you're one smart cookie!"
>...wow.
>"The meaning of life? What even /is/ meaning? You can't touch it, or eat it or snuggle up to it on a cold night! The universe is a cold, empty place, and any order or rules we impose on it are merely our own transient attempts to impose order on chaos."
>You stare at your cupcake
>"Truth, beauty, love... none of those exist beyond our own fragile perceptions. We're born into this world fumbling for meaning, Anon, trying to twist an indifferent world into something that we can bear to face!"
>Pinkie leans in close, a conspirational look in her eye
>"In a hundred years, we'll all be gone, and so will most of the people who remembered us. We come from nothing, and we go back to it. Everything we do is ultimately meaningless, Anon."
"...oh. That's an... interesting outlook."
>"Yep! And that's not even the best bit!"
>She takes a deep breath
>"SinceEverythingIsSubjectiveAndSeemsDifferentByItsPerceptionByIndividualsWe'reNotEvenExperiencingTheSameRealitySoNotOnlyAreWeTrappedInAUniverseThatAtBestDoesn'tKnowWeExistAndAtWorseAbhorsUs-"
>Pinkie sucks in another lungful of air
>"-ButWeCanNeverEverCommunicateAnythingToOthersInAWayThatPerfectlyPreservesMeaningSoInSomeWaysWe'reCompletelyAloneFromTheCradleToTheGraveWhichIsSomethingCompletelyBeyondOurConrolAndNoMatterHowYouLiveYourLifeThere'sNoTellingWhenACartWillRunYouOverOrYou'llBeSmashesToPiecesByAFallingPiano-"
>Again, she takes a deep breath
>"-AndSometimesIWakeUpInTheMorningAndICanBarelyGetOutOfBedBecauseTheWorldSeemsSoBigAndColdAndMyBedIsSoToastyAndWarmThatIJustWantToCurlUpAndSleepForeverButThenIRememberThatThat'sExactlyWhyIShouldGetOutOfBedBecauseMyFriendsAndFamilyAreTrappedInExactlyTheSameWayAndThatIfTheyLoveMeHalfAsMuch-"
>Gasp
"-

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>>29628670
AsILoveThemThenMyLifeDoesHaveValueAndIOweItToThemToDoMyBestToMakeThemSmileForJustAMomentBecauseIfTheyDoTheUniverseDoesn'tSeemSoSadAndLonelyAndICanAlmostBelieveThatEverythingWillBeAlright!"
>Pinkie finishes with a flourish
>You blink
"Uh... come again?"
>That was fast.
>It's impressive she can just ream things off like that, but you followed about three words she said. Something about a piano, and how toasty her bed is?
>Pinkie just giggles
>"I'll write it down for you next time!"
>You shrug
>Pinkie, huh?
>Still...
"Do you talk about the pointlessness of existence with all of your customers?"
>She shakes her head vigorously
>"Only with the ones that look like they need cheering up!"
>You laugh, and Pinkie joins in
"Still, it's a pretty morbid outlook. How do you cope with something like that?"
>Pinkie grins, and suddenly sweeps the other two cupcakes off the tray, stuffing them into her mouth and swallowing them in one go
>"That's the secret, Anon..."
>She puts the tray away
>"I eat /two/ cupcakes!"
>Pinkie saunters off happily

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>>29629812
>>29629822
>>29629827
nice

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>>29628670

>>29628670
but she is real. How would you know about her if she didn't exist?

>>29629799
WAT?? DELET THIS!!!

>>29628915
Yeehaw hhahahaha LOL

>>29630060
But I do that I won't see my waifu. Everyone knows if you suicide you don't go to Equestria

>>29628670
theres always tulpamancy.

>>29628670
>>29632830
Yeah, If you really want companionship for life and a real talking waifu then get a Ponka tulpa

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>>29628670

>>29632878
i want to believe.
>Without oxygen, irreversible brain damage starts to occur within 3 to 5 minutes. Less than 5% of Sudden Cardiac Arrest victims survive long enough to reach a hospital. Over 95% of the SCA victims die within 5 minutes.

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>>29628693
>implying

>>29635131
But not like panka would

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>>29628693
Do it faggot

>>29633996
I always liked to think that pinkies story involved losing someone and that's why she appreciates everyone so much

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>>29628670
>not real

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>>29628709
No hooves cliche aside; produced porn is fucking garbage. Just a bunch of women ranging from 4/10 to 7/10 pulling stupid faces while moaning like retards. Pass.

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>>29628670
I dont want to make you feel worse but when Pinkie looks like that it makes me want to take advantage of her.

I'd probably do something like gently apply pressure to her shoulder blades so her chest is pinned to the ground and with my free hand I'd start fingering her dry asshole. She'd groan and pitifully try to scamper away while saying shes "not in the mood" or "she hates the feeling" but id keep at it, wearing her down till eventually she just curl up and start sobbing into her fore hooves. Maybe then I'd stop... maybe.