LIST OF UPCOMING EPISODES, I CAN CONFIRM THESE ARE TRUE BECAUSE

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LIST OF UPCOMING EPISODES, I CAN CONFIRM THESE ARE TRUE BECAUSE I AM PROMETHEUS Q. HASBRO III, PRESIDENT OF HASBRO.

1&2: "Past Sins"

Twilight adopts a little filly named Nyx, who is perfect at everything and also an alicorn. Out of character drama ensues

3: "Lyra and Bon Bon's Big Adventure!"

Lyra and Bon Bon are lesbians who live together in Ponyville. Lyra wants to walk just like a human! Hilarious!

4: "Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie Make Out for 22 Minutes"

After being taught the joys of lesbianity in the previous episode, Dash and Pinkie go at it in the middle of church.

5: "Fall Out, Equestria!"

Twilight joins the army. A typical army command is "Fall out!" See what we did there?

6: "Rarity is a Pedophile Now."

We at Hasbro are determined to pander to EVERY part of the fandom. Don't miss the graphic Sweetie Belle rape scene/musical number.

7: "The Littlest Pony Shop!"

Special Littlest Pet Shop crossover! When the pet shop pets meet the ponies, everyone is shocked to discover they have the same fucking personalities. Who's responsible for this plague of unoriginality? Who cares! Buy all our playsets and toys!

8: "OC Party!"

Special episode full of nothing but OC's sent in by fans! Black winged alicorns everywhere!

9: "Applejack's Very Own Episode"

JUST KIDDING. Pinkie Pie episode.