Satyr Abomination Thread #163: Someone Fucked Up Edition

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SPoilerd for Cow oudders

>Petunai makes her way to the door as you stop her.
“Petunia wait!”
>”Yes dad?”
“Yo’re udders are showings Heweeite, here, hid yer sweeter cows.”
>”DaDDy! I HATE using the sweater cow!”
“Now ePEtunia, you know that nsome pussy ass anon is gonn aget triggerd and report you tou the royal gestapso, and we don’t want that sweetie. Now cmon, put on the sweetrer dog.”
>She sighs annoyed and lumbers over before picking up her arms as youu drape the larger skirth like garb over her and stopping over her meatey cow udders, past her regular guhman udders,.
>She give s a tap test and does a little bounc to test the jiggle before deeming it safe to wear ,”Ok dad, am I good now”?
”Yes swettie, no pussy whipped anons are gonna get offended now that you are in your cow burqA.”
>Today was a cow problems day.

>>27110136
TOUCH THE COW

>>27110136
Go to bed, Anon. Write when you're less inebriated

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>>27110136
I agree actually, Anon. And usually people allow it since cow udders are so normalized they appear uncensored in many pieced of children's material.

But between people who hate satyr general, people with an 1910 concept of decency, cocksucking rulefags, and that people will probably think a cow udder on anything other than a pure bovine is a fetish thing, it's best to keep them out of the thread header that everyone checking the catalogue will see, lest we risk random deletion.

>>27110136
It's hilarious to watch drunk people try and write stories.

>>27110215
I can do more for you ANon, I cna do whtetrver random one shots you want m,e. to make.
JUst dont do characters taht suck

>>27110253
Udder contest between Kimmy Mera and Petunia.

Petunias breasts and udder are much bigger, but Kimmy's got an extra six tiger teats.
Who will win?

>>27110286
>Kimmy and Mera stand on their side of the ring, and practive breathing as they jiggle their cancerous udders, an ally of them I don’t know who rubs their soldiers non sensualkly “You gotta keep at it Mera! Don’t lost to tnhis fucking wahale of a cow.”]\


captcha is hard asw fuck while drnnl
>”I got it boss, that cow is going to pasture.”
>On the ther side PEtunaia has her hsoolders rbeed buy Utha, “Now, im not a man of simple things, but you gotta get in there, and uh, whop that kimeras ass,”:
>”I got It sweetiue, I wont let yhou down.”
>The bell dings a ling as the two meet in the center ot square off in the octagonm,, bounding their bulbous growths they then smack titties agsint one another as the crowd cheers on..
>Mammary against mammary they smake their teets raw as the Pogo ref steps in, “No rough tetting damn it!”
>In the end Petunia won, because quality of over quanity bitch.
>Kimmy and Mera stand on their side of the ring, and practive breathing as they jiggle their cancerous udders, an ally of them I don’t know who rubs their soldiers non sensualkly “You gotta keep at it Mera! Don’t lost to tnhis fucking wahale of a cow.”
>”I got it boss, that cow is going to pasture.”
>On the ther side PEtunaia has her hsoolders rbeed buy Utha, “Now, im not a man of simple things, but you gotta get in there, and uh, whop that kimeras ass,”:
>”I got It sweetiue, I wont let yhou down.”
>The bell dings a ling as the two meet in the center ot square off in the octagonm,, bounding their bulbous growths they then smack titties agsint one another as the crowd cheers on..
>Mammary against mammary they smake their teets raw as the Pogo ref steps in, “No rough tetting damn it!”
>In the end Petunia won, because quality of over quanity bitch.

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Ash posting when? I kinda want her and Ash to be best buds.

>>27110582
A kek was had.

>>27110591
I second this. We need Ash stories.

>>27110885
Watching the epidsode rigt now, and I dont egven give a shit.

>>27110671
any more sjhhtS?

>>27110948
Anon. Anon. Got to bed. You're drunk.

I hope the dropbox guy remembers to post the pics that has him confused.

To Anons who liked the Blare story last thread, what exactly did you like about it? What were your thoughts while reading it?

>>27112503

It made sense of her being a delinquent. I knew a few kids in foster care and some of them were okay, but others weren't.

It just kinda hot home with me for lack of a better expression.

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Which one is which?

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Slow day.

>>27113457
I'unno, I could talk about my monster hunting headcanon some more or splurg about drakes some more to heat up a debate.

>>27113457
I was taking drunken one shot requests until I vomited and fell asleep. Im doing better now

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>>27113621
Nah. More bestiality.
A zoophilia edition of the thread was made mere seconds after this one.
Lets fill some animal wombs, in honor of what might have been.

>>27113650
Glad you're better.

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>>27113650

You're the Anon who made the thread with Petunia in the OP, aren't you?

>Captcha: Darcy 3600

>>27113671
>Glad you're better.
Thanks Anon.

>>27113686
Yes, yes I did. I like the udder variant of Petunia, I think she's made more exotic than our standard satyr.

>>27113712
I like your tastes, Anon.
I prefer when our satyrs retain their extra parts like that. As far as I'm concerned, even pony satyrs still have crotch tits.

>>27113671
Can we talk about the birbs? Do you think Oliver and Pluma would get along with Cottontail* given that they're both predatory fowls?

*Name bending

>>27113758
It depends on how much their non-sapient heritage influences their behavior.

>>27113803
That's true. Though Oliver's mute, so he can't really express that. He may be slowly, quietly stalking her from a distance though. Pluma, meanwhile, is obviously capable of speech. Do phoenixes even hunt bunnies?

>>27113686
Do you think Darcy has to drive her younger siblings and cousins to school?

>>27113712
Udders are not sexual. People make them sexual:

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>>27114694
Touch the cow. Do it now.

>>27114742
Utah touches the cow.

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>>27115341
Do you think he tells his parents or keeps it low because he doesn't want them to get involved?

>>27115425
Loving on the dl.

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Guys, I found Snapshot's Fire Emblem foil...

>>27116551

>Be trap
>Eat more carpet than a malfunctioning Hoover

Uhh

>>27116629
If you go with the model headcanon; Snapshot would be surrounded by mares a looot. He'd probably get as much pussy as he does getting dicked.

>>27115696
Where do they sneak off when they want to be together?

>>27117145
The abandoned barn in the back of the orchard.

How's the awkwardness of satyr puberty? Not just the kick of hormones either. I'm talking about the voice changes, mood swings, and awkward physiological developments that come with it. Which abominations had it the worst? Which ones had it the best?

>>27117380
>awkwardness
depends on their parents. some will inevitably make it worse, and some will give them the room they need to find themselves, or whatever.

>>27117421
Which parents would be which though? RD could go either way, either being totally chill about it or over exaggerating about how her babies are getting older and won't think their super cool mom is as awesome as she says she is.

>>27117380
Hormones are bad enough. Most satyrs are a mix of a species that go into heat, and one that's essentially always in heat. So estrus just hits them like a sledgehammer.
Many days are spent sitting in buckets of ice.

>>27117548
Oof. Talk about blue bean. Ponies, griffons, dogs, and changelings are the ones that get the heat, correct? And is it all individualized or is it a collective experience that happens around the same time? How do the males react?

>>27110885
>>27110591
I'll write some after today, probably. SoL with Thistle, her parents, just her, or some other abomination?

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Everyone always talks about Ace being the Wonderbolt satyr with a propinquity for young boys, but I say that title should go to Stormwalker. Her aggressive character just screams sexual predator to me. She'd want someone to dominate but no one that'd put up a significant fight, so she goes playing with some of the colts and fillies that make up the Wonderbolt hopefuls and give them 'special lessons' for nurturing future Wonderbolt skills.

>>27118095
>Stormwalker/Icarus otp

>>27118111
But think of all the little colts she could molest at once! Besides, Icarus is better with Ace anyway. She's the captain's daughter after all.

>>27118123
>Implying

>>27118123
>implying Ace isn't already taken by Hotshot

>>27118123
Bull shit. If that were the case, Icarus would hook up with Soarin's (non-existent) girl. That's like those Fluttermac shippers who say they are perfect for each other just because they're both quiet... And then they pseudo got what they want with Marble. To be fair though, anything Twilicorn and post is shit. Plus >>27118111
Those digits.

>>27118111
>>27118155
THE NUMBERS HAVE SPOKEN. Unless numbers of equal or greater repeating value are presented, it has been set.

>>27118143
>Implying Spitfire isn't obviously topest-tier Wonderbolt
Cloudchaser's great, and so is her sister, but fire horse clearly runs the show.
>>27118157
But it's in Icarus' character! He thinks he deserves the best because of how great he perceives himself. And who would be the best girlfriend for him other than the daughter of the best Wonderbolt? Also you're statement is null if you don't acknowledge the show past Twilicorn, no matter how far off the train tracks we've gone. Ember still a cute though.
>>27118155
Hot.I'd buy it, but no way their poppa's gonna fall into degeneracy like that.

And once again, the thread is derailed by a shit tier satyr. Fucking gator bait should be proud of what he's made.

>>27118111
>>27118123
>>27118157
>>27118176
>Icarus x Ambrosia
All your ships are shit. Ace can go fuck a cactus, go fuck a male model, or go fuck Radiance. But she ain't fucking Icarus.

>>27118176
How is it null? The SoarinDash stuff has been around since season 1. It just got more feed in season 4.

>>27118189
>Hot opinions by local hipster.

>>27118218
>Implying Ace and Hotshot have not become shit tier
Denial can only take you so far

>>27118209
Well it'd be great, but she doesn't exist currently. All we could do is speculate about their relationship. Would she even like pie?

>>27118155
I'd rather incest be wincest than deal with this shit for forty more posts.

>>27118231
>Soarin likes pie
>Sexual innuendo
>Blank like wieners
>Sexual innuendo
Pie wieners?
Also, basing child relationships off their parents' is fucking idiotic. How about you all try forming original interactions instead of making carbon copies of their parents? Better, go for the parental drama. Like the Fluttershy hating drake stuff. Or AJ being racist to cows.

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>>27118189
>>27118220
>>27118243
You know, considering this thread is shared by everyone, you could try ignoring stuff you dislike.

>>27118243
>Parental drama
The only drama I can think Spitfire having would be with Lightning Dust. She's a pretty under developed character. So Ace hooking up with Maverick or Hotshot with Amelia. Which is kind of a bummer. Hotshot hooking up with Quiet Gestures was kawaii as fuck.

>>27118243
Because then you wouldn't have to stretch the suspension of disbelief why they're even together in the first place.

>>27118256
So, out of ALL

>>27118111
>>27118123
>>27118155
>>27118157
>>27118176
>>27118189
>>27118194
>>27118218
>>27118220
This. You only choose three to reply to, even though both sides are flinging shit. Trying to cover your ass while preaching "objectivity" of ignoring different opinions falls VERY hollow. Next time preach tolerance before you make a jack ass of yourself.

>>27118270
Did you hook up with a one of your mom or dad's friend's kids? If so... That is REALLY fucking coincidental, unless you live in a small town. If not, who did you hook up with? A friend from school? Someone you met yourself? Or C) The mystery Box?

>>27118232
I'd rather talk about Stormchaser possibly being a filly fiddler...

>>27118289
We've HAD this discussion. All pegasatyr females are predators! It's in their nature. To hunt the young, the weak. Then throw in some human. To FUCK the young, the tasty.

>>27118298
Really? Cool! Well that answers my question. So female pegasus satyrs are basically tinier Amazons? Where does that leave their male counterparts?

>>27118308
Sadly unaffected... Or they seek older women. That would explain a bit.

>>27118273
Okay. You're right. I'll scold all the many, many, many people flinging shit at you.


>>27118218
You, large number of other people who said something negative. Just because this guy is making complaints against a popular thing, and just because they lack any substance besides "I don't like them, they're shit!". Doesn't automatically make him a hipster. He might just be a bitter ass.
Please say you're sorry.

And Complain Anon? I'll be sure to add Ace and Hotshot to your list of triggers.

>>27118316
>Popular
>Implying
The Spitfire kids haven't been popular since Gatorbait actually wrote stories on a regular basis. So it has been a fucking long time.

>>27118315
I wrote a story that Dynamo (younger) and Tonbo (older) were in a romantic relationship, so you actually may be right on that.

>>27118330
I wonder what quirks Earth and Unicorn satyrs have for seeking mates.

>>27118337
Earth satyr would probably go for someone who's as family orientated and active as they are. Someone hardworking with the muscles to prove it. Unicorn satyrs might just go for a number of things: wittiness, style, class, magical ability, etc. They're pretty elitist. Griffons and changelings on the other hand are really just looking for who's the best fuck.

>>27118337
Female Earth Satyrs seek strong and/or tall mates. Males seek motherly/thicc mates.

Female and Male Unicorn satyrs are just weird; hooking up with whatever they find exotic enough to interest them. Drakes, Changetyrs, Taurs, same sex, different sex, even themselves. Fucking weirdos.

>>27118349
But it's just masturbation if it's themselves. Like twincest, only it's the Rule 63 version of yourself.

>>27118194
Radiance is only for Dawn and Mistake.

>>27118232
Wincest is the best kind of incest.

>>27118349
What do drakes, sphinxes, and taurs look for in a mate?

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>>27116653
Snapshot is the satyr version of Freddy Mercury. Yes, he's an enormous faggot with an unquenchable thirst for dick, but he also get more horse pussy in the course of a week than most guys do in their entire lives.


Also, for any artist reading this, I have a big request. If you have the time and inclination, can we have a de-memed version of this picture with Anon as the USA, a bunch of griffons as the Aryans, some minotaurs as the Asians, a couple of zebras as the Africans and last but not least, Snapshot as Sweden?

I know it's following the headcanon that Snapshot's noting but a massive manwhore, and a lot of people don't like that, butt fuck it.

>>27118363
The common misconception: Masturbation is the act of getting oneself off sexually in a solo environment. When another party is involved; directly or otherwise, it becomes a sexual act other than masturbation. Voyeurism, live pornography, jerk off instructions (live), or even plain sex. If this other party happens to be yourself... Well, it isn't masturbation anymore.

>>27118381
Early days of the thread; Ace and Radiance was a thing. Not so much now.

>>27118387
Not enough data to make an accurate assumption or hypothesis. There's only, like, two of each of those; males or females.

>>27118398
Does he actively try to even the dick:pussy ratio?

>>27118407
Why you gotta make me look like a butt hole? >>27118408
Also, if someone could do that, I too would appreciate this.

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>>27118408
Actually four if you count the new recent editions

>>27118408
>Does he actively try to even the dick:pussy ratio?
Yes, he has to.

If he gets too much pussy he begins to grow a beard and grow muscles the pillar men would be proud of. Conversely, if he gets dicked too frequently, his hips begin to widen and he starts to grow breasts. Balance must be maintained, as sensei taught him.

>>27118417
Four female Gryphons? Emma, Alex, Jade(?), and...?

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>>27118419
And Noelle. You got the names right, yeah. Alex is the forerunner of the four though. Emma's the weeb, Jade's the rookie monster hunter, and Noelle just wants to be a storyteller.

>>27118424
Not gonna lie, been ignoring the last two. Jade because monster hunting (eh) and Noelle because I'm assuming she was made around the same postd Jade was? Thought they were a satyr parent combo.

>>27118427
No, Noelle's Natalya's daughter, the white griffon from the Equestria games episode. Jade is from Gilda's greenish griffon friend.

>>27117634
Changelings are debatable, depending on the insect/equine ratio. Buffalo would have one.
Native minotaurs, however, if they have one or the other, would likely have heat, since their human part is diluted

>>27118427
Hm. If it honestly seems like I'm the only one that recognizes the monster hunting headcanon then maybe I should just leave it in my head and just write slice of life or drama.

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>>27118407
Might be worth a tiny kek or two, but it'd be more work than any artist is likely to put in.

>You just found out that a satyr, whom you're not related to in any way, has a crush on you
>What do?

>>27119057
Assuming it's a female satyr and reasonably attractive (which pretty much all of them are), ask her out on a date I guess.

>>27119423
Adding a twist:
>It's your satyr kid's friend

>>27119804
Does that make a difference?

>>27119931
That depends on whether or not your wife is gone.

>>27119057
This brings up an interesting point.
How would you react to your kid having a crush on someone i.e. another anon you know.

>>27119952
Good point. In the hypotethical situation that I had a wife it might matter. It would be the fact that I was cheating on my wife that mattered though, not the crushing satyr's relationship with my daughteru.

>>27119959
I would not like it, odds are he would be much older than her and she would be putty in his metaphorical hand due to her naivety. I'd probably limit their contact and try to divert her attention elsewhere.

>inb4 "But anon, then that would just push her further into his arms and then how would handle x?"

If my satyr boy had a crush on a female aquantice i would not be as worried. Odds are he is out of her dating league, but I would still steer him away from the idea.

>>27119959
If he was a decent guy that would be fine I guess. Unless my daughteru was dating me in the first place.

>>27120002
Yeah, females can't rape so he'd be fine.

>>27119959
Seeing how small Ponyville is and how you're one of the few humans who lives there, then wouldn't you pretty much know everyone to some extent?

>>27120041
>Small
>That many satyrs
>Human migration
>Ignoring that other animals have sentience

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>>27118189
June 3, the year of our Lord two-thousand and thirteen
Best Day Of My Life

>>27120060

So why is Ponyville the main place for humans to settle and not a larger city?

>>27120063
What happened then?

>>27118475
It's not like you can't write other stories besides the monster hunting shtick, can't you? You could keep your own private headcanon, undisturbed and free from discourse, and still make content you know.

>>27120082
What makes you think it is?
After the anomaly, there are probably humans all over Equestria, just relatively few compared to the native Equestrian species.>>27120097

>>27120094
Nothing important.

>>27120109
>Implying
Tell that to the writers who have ponies move so their satyr interaction is easier.

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>>27120116
For you maybe.
>>27120094
Consider the quote in context.
Ace's, and technically Hotshot's Debut

>>27120097
What fun is that then? Writing something and being limited is the first step in killing the buzz someone gets from content creation. Another way to look at it;
>"You can write about blank 1, but not blank 2. And if you happen to like blank 2, well, you're shit out of luck, you stupid cunt!"
Being told a thing you want to work on is stupid/forbidden just feels bad. Why work for a thing that makes you feel bad? For free. >>27118475
Doesn't have to write shit. They choose to. If they just happen to make quite a bit of Adventure/Monster Hunting and occasionally drop some SoL; that's the thread's problem to deal with.
>Implying content is a problem
>Not implying the thread has become a bunch of self entitled fucks who have lost many writefags and artists

>>27120152
Nothing important. as evidenced by >>27120094
still wondering, despite context. Like saying that the 28th of this month is a great day to come. Gonna google it? Gonna be a little cheater? It's national super hero day, b t dubs. Not that you'd know or care off that bat. Nothing important.

>>27120109

It could be from the show bias but we have more Satyrs running around Ponyville than anywhere.

We have like two in Appleoosa.

A handful in Canterlot.

One or two in Manehattan.

A few wherever dragons fuck off to.

Then several scattered wherever.

Yet Ponyville has a vast majority of the Satyrs.

Like I said, it could be show bias since it's based in Ponyville and that's where the main characters live.

>>27120129
Whatever headcanon floats your boat I guess. I never really imagined there being more humans in ponyville than other parts of Equestria.

>>27120171
And I agree with that. I was trying to imply that >>27120129
is a BAD thing.

>>27120164
>the little things about your kids aren't important
>other people have to acknowledge them for that to be true
I'd as you what you're doing here, kouhai, but you're in good company on this board.

>>27120063
>>27120152
Ace was created on June 3? How about that.
Do you remember when the other satyrs were created?

>>27120129

I can justify Pegasus Ponies moving from Cloudsdale because humans wouldn't be able to live there, but that's about it.

Satyrs moving when they're older is another discussion altogether

>>27120167
>we have more Satyrs running around Ponyville than anywhere
Isn't that just because most of the canon main characters and background ponies live in Ponyville?

In my headcanon, there are just as many satyrs elsewhere. They just don't get written about because they aren't related to canon characters.

>>27120190
Yeah, that makes sense. Cloud cities are a special case since non-pegasi are unable to walk on clouds naturally.

>>27120189
Why would I remember days that don't really matter to me?

>>27120190
>Cloud walking spell
Or you can get a pair of cloud walking enchanted shoes for just 69.99! That's just over a year of xbox live. Guaranteed to let you walk on the clouds* for a full 365 days minimum OR we'll give you three years free!
*Note, shoes must be worn to work

>>27120154
I mean...he's not wrong though? People aren't really taking to the whole monster hunter vibe an have raised some legitimate criticism about it. Maybe I'm the only one who likes the setting and idea, but there's really no point in spending time and effort to create something no one would like or acknowledge. So I think I'm just going to lay off the whole thing and start writing some stuff about drakes, or other satyrs and stuff. Maybe write about Atlas and Aeon if I want an adventure fix. And it's in no way fault with the thread, I think I just go too caught up in making my own setting to see that no one was really biting for it.
>>27120196
Except Emery, of course
>>27120201
Griffons are able to cloudwalk as well

>>27120220
It would still be risky. What if the spell wore off or someone forgot to put their shoes on?

I'd imagine these things would be okay for visiting temporarily but that most non-pegasi wouldn't want to live in a cloud city.

>>27120226
>Maybe I'm the only one who likes the setting and idea,
You're not. It's just complain-anon who loves to raise a stink about it because of the incest-association.

>>27120226
>Except Emery, of course
Yeah, she was one of the lucky few non-celebrity-related satyrs to get written about.

>>27120240
Yeah, no. Two different guys here. Apparently I'm part of the "incest hate" Anon group. Which has at least one other guy. Can only objectively say one, but probably more since incest pushing is fucking annoying. But I honestly don't care/mind the MH stuff. Can't speak for the other guy(s), but the hate from the MH stuff isn't coming from here. IT'S ALMOST LIKE DIFFERENT PEOPLE DISLIKE DIFFERENT THINGS. HOLY SHIT! Fucking faggot. Not all the hate comes from one source.

>>27120240
As he said, several people have raised some criticism about it.
Are you going to go on an endless rant and act like you're a knight in shining armour again?

>>27120272
Nah, there hasn't really been any complaining to speak of lately.

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>>27118243
Why would AJ be racist toward cows?

>>27120272
He usually does. The sole hero of satyr, battling the singular Anon who hath created all the hate ever in this thread! Defending the righteous incest satyr stands for. If only every thread had one of him to save these poor fools. An ego filled prick to help speed up the boards eventual kill. Then we'd all be free... but then there would be no satyr. Sad.

>>27120314
>Owns cows
>Keeps them in a barn
>Southern accent
>Basic monopoly on apples
Now, I'm not saying AJ is a racist. I'm just saying she's sporting a fine gray uniform.

>>27120265
>>27120240
I'm alright discontinuing it though. It's not like it's hurting anybody. Besides, that means I have a lot more directions and options I want the characters to go then. For instance, instead of a rookie monster hunter, Jade could just be the thread's Chie and watch a ton of martial arts and kung-fu movies. I'm still wondering if I can keep them a tad athletic and muscular though...

>>27120340
But Chie is worst girl... wait, that'd be Yukiko. Chie is second worst girl.

>>27120355
You take back your filthy mouth Anon! Chie isn't even my best girl in PS4, it's actually Naoto.

>>27120340
Of course you can. Or was that a question to yourself that meant like "if they watch a ton of martial arts and kung-fu movies, then they won't have time or much reason to exercise a little every day"?

>>27120372
If it helps, she is leagues above Yukiko. She only has meat and Kung Fu, but at least she isn't totally bland. Plus, you know, spats.

>>27120314
>Satyrs are now lewd, we are a proud and noble race!

>>27120379
No, that was just a general question about the quartet. Maybe have Gumdrop trained in Krav Maga because Bon Bon is a bit paranoid some of her enemies from when she was a spy might take advantage of her daughter in order to get to her.

>>27120403
>screamingslutelf.jpg

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>>27120389
Spaaaats! I still liked the bodysuits though, they were nice. I could live with spats though. Tight, sweaty, spats that hug the booties so well.

>>27120442
How dare you! Marcille is pure.

You don't happen to have that picture, do you? I can't seem to find it on Google and there's no Dungeon Meshi thread up on /a/ that I can see.

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>>27120567
As pure as the rest of those knife-eared whores. They give their lovers goodnight kisses and hold their hands all throughout the day. They're insatiable!

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>>27120403
It's only a matter of time before the HFAS and drunken revelry kicks in.

>>27120739
Sibling incest superior wincest master race.

>>27120752
Don't have the numbers to back that statement up, boy

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>>27120752
Father on daughter is clearly bestcest, but you're entitled to your opinion.

>>27120771
It's the lesser form of degeneracy, so that puts us on the high ground.

>>27120633
Thank you fampai. We need a satyr version of this ASAP.

>>27120752
>>27120784
>>27120786
no numbers, no clout.

>>27120403
>Satyrs are now lewd
not

Fucking bugger shit cunt.

>Thistle meets Ash for the first time on Ash's seventh birthday, a few months before Thistle turns six.
>She comes and visits Ponyville with her father since her father since her mother was a tad busy managing the dragons
>How does their first playdate go?

>>27121041
They become child besties

>Come to thread
>Check list of all satyr's
>one is named lil' mac

THIS BETTER BE WHO I THINK IT IS

>>27121454
You've never seen Lil Mac before today?

>>27121522
n-no

>>27121549
Oh. Well, he might not be what you expect, but his dad is definitely who you would expect.

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>Look in the archive
>Not a single story about Yuzu is there
This saddens me greatly.
I just know people have written stories about her, so where are they?

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>>27122000

Somewhere that's not the archive

>>27122030
If you happen to know where this somewhere is, then you should repost the stories and/or upload it to the archive.

>>27122000
There are a lot of stories about several satyrs out there that has never been saved.
Didn't some guys once talk about going through all the threads and repost whatever stories they found that isn't in any pastebin?

>>27122000
Are you looking for a specific story about her? If so, I've written a bunch of stuff for this thread without putting on on a name, so it's possible I may have the one you're looking for.

>>27122576
Why don't you save your stuff in the thread Anon? Do you want to hoard all of Yuzu's precious moments for yourself?

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>>27122000
Them digits deserved something, so here you go.

>"Daddy?"
>"Daaaaaddy."
>"Dad. I have a favor to ask."
>With a sigh, you lower your book and look down at your young daughter.
"If it's what I think it is, the answer's no."
>She recoils slightly, but presses the issue.
>"But daddy. I really, really need it. Please?'
>Raising your bandaged arm in front of your face, dried blood still staining the most recent one, you try to get through to the satyr.
"Yuzu. You know I love you, but you're draining daddy dry. You're almost 8, far too big and old for me to feed you directly so often."
>"But.." she starts with a small hiccup, tears welling in her eyes. "But your blood is so much better. That animal blood tastes so icky."
>Looking down at the small, pajama clad batyr, her eyes practically begging, her wings drooping, you can't resist for long.
"Fine. But this is the last time this week, you need to learn to eat your vegetables."
>Yuzu jumps in excitement, her hooves clacking against the wooden floor.
>In the blink of an eye, she's in your lap, cuddling into your chest as you unwrap your arm.
>Your fists clench as her fangs sink in with a painful sting.
>Picking up Yuzu's favorite bedtime story, you settle in as fatigue begins to creep up on you.

>>27121272
But what do they do? Does Ash wear her mom's helmet around for no apparent reason as Thistle invites her to dine on her scrumptious Easy Bake Oven cakes?

>>27122603
Yes, only I'm allowed fond memories of her formative years. Seriously though, I generally only bother keeping copies of the shit I've posted if it's over two or three posts worth of green and had actual effot put into writing it.

Spur of the moment oneshots written in response to something that made me kek aren't usually saved, but rather they're fleeting, like tears in rain.

>>27122617
Man, Anon's going to have so much rabies.

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>>27122657
Is Muddle the only masculine drake in existence? He's suffocated by five female drakes, one trap drake, his loser little brother, and his baby sister. Is Muddle the last defense for defending the image of what it means to be a dragon in Equestria?

>>27122787
I tend to collect these tiny stories into single pastes of about a dozen each.

>>27122882
>Muddle
>Masculine
I laughed so hard I worried my nieces. That's funny, you're funny.

>>27123100
He is compared to all the other drakes.

>>27122882

Remember when Simmer was just a twiggy nice guy?

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>>27123155
I don't think his first picture was all that twiggy. Remember when Pogo and Garnet was still a thing?

>>27123155
Isn't he still that?

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>>27123251
He wasn't for a while when that Anon tried to push for that monster hunting mess, then he turned into a buff and tough badass OC who kills munsters in the morning and fucks his sister at night!!1!1@ But the main proponent of that said he's stopping that, so he's been reset I guess. Though I want to focus on other drakes than Simmer, we never hear about cute 'ol Snap anymore after people stopped shipping her with Laika. A solo story about his sister would be nice. Or Ash. If there's any drake that deserves to be a warrior princess, it's her.

Drake posting killed the thread. Don't do dragon drugs.

>>27124405
>Dragon drugs
>You will never snort fire dust off of Ash's tits.

>>27124405
>Implying
You gonna say Ace or incest almost killed it before? Come on, let's make it a game of clue. Cotton Candy, 200 posts in, with more spam.

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>>27124534
Hope, with daddy's dick, in her ass.

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>>27124534

>Ace forced as hard as incest

Really nigga?

>>27124425
U-unf...

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>>27122617

>>27123100
Well, he's masculine in an immature Kevin sort of way.

>>27124746
>Muddle muttering "dorks"
This fits too well.

>>27122882

>Muddle
>Gargle
>Simmer

vs

>Blare
>Ash
>Broil
>Thistle
>Whatever Muddle's sister's name is

We could use a few more male drakes.

And males in general.

>>27125733
No, because the thread has an allergy to boy satyrs.

>>27125897

Unless they're traps.

>>27125733
You forgot Snap

>>27125897
The thread has a bias towards girls because daughters are cuter than sons. Plus this thread is a walking Electra complex fetish

>>27126349
You're a part of the problem of what's wrong with this thread

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>>27126372
The problem with this thread is that too many people in every camp can't stand people liking what they don't like, and are often content to bitch and call their fans problems and cancer instead of contributing to things they themselves enjoy.

And if called out, they feed you some defeatist line about how "If you try to talk about anything else, it just becomes about x anyway. So I'll just keep complaining instead.".

>>27126578
Haven't seen that argument in a while. Or I'm blind.

Do we have any stories where a satyr is either clearly a villain or at least antihero/antivillain?

>>27127774
>Clearly a villain
Storywise, I kinda remember something super edgey years ago. I THINK it had something o do with the MH headcanon and a crown. The only other thing I can think of is portrayal wise. In which case, that would be Hans, that Breezy satyr NEVER trust a fairy!, and I'm pretty sure Sombra had a magic evil cloud dust satyr baby.

>>27128255
... You are either new, or DJ is trying a new style. Either way, I like.

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>>27128408
It's DJ. I'm not trying a new style, it's just a satyrized version of pic related

>>27128449
I knew that shit looked familiar.

>>27128449
Aw, too bad. I liked your "new" style. I like your old style. I like your style.

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>>27128708

Speaking of styles, how about a Dragon Ball Z style Garret?

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>>27128933
dfvblablkajbsdlkjbalkjsbdflajkbsdflajsdflkasjdflkasjbdgvlkajhblakjdyhfuck

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Or a Slayers style Yuzu?

>>27128944
Cowboy Bebop?
Radical Gumdrop?

>>27128255
>>27128796
>>27128937
>>27128944
Noice!

>>27128944
>slayers

My nigga, and Yuzu is a cutie in that style

>>27129577
>implying Yuzu is ever NOT a cutie

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>>27129652
She's had it rough since it was made illegal to be cuter than the Princess Dawn. Damn her for always having to get her way.

>"Okay, how do I look, daddy?"
"Like a fuzzy little angel."
>"Damn it, no! What more can I do? I've purposely not washed behind my luxuriously fluffy ears, I've not brushed my hair and I've put on my dirtiest and most crumpled clothes with no regard to if they match one another. How can I still be too cute?"
"It's comes naturally to you, cupcake."
>"But I'm due to meet my friends in an hour and I can't afford another two-hundred Bit fine. Curse you adorable genetics!"
"You could always put on a bunch of weight and become preachy and opinionated on subjects you know nothing about, sweetie. That'd make you less cute for sure... Except to me of course."
>"Eww, I'd rather die."

>>27129978
Would Dawn be extremely jealous of Yuzu's fluffy ears?

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this bitch thinks shes hot shit cause pf some fucking inflatable crown

>>27130476

>inflatable crown

>not a Burger King crown

It's shit

>>27128937
Jeezus, Garret looks like he's about to go Super Saiyan.

And he'd be the best goddamned Super Saiyan ever.

You should do Toriyama-style more often. Maybe give us some Chrono Trigger love?

>>27130476
>Dat Yuzu face
Fuck that's adorable.

taking one shot requests to work on during breaks and lunch at work.

>>27130909
A family lets their young satyr kid tag along with them to a superstore.

>>27130476

>"Hmm, not good enough. Some people may still think you're cute than me."
"Are you kidding me‽ I'm dressed in a potato sack, what more do you want me to do‽"
>"Could you... I don't know, slouch to give yourself a hump and lisp horribly?"
"God... I hate this stupid law so freaking much."
>"What was that?"
"N-Nothing, princess."
>"Nothing, huh? It sounded to more like 'please have me tarred and feathered' to me."
"No! I'll uh... I'll just slouch and drool like a retarded child, shall I?"
>"Yes, that would be splendid if you could."

She mad jelly of those ears.

>>27130909
Satyr tries to cook for their family.

>>27130978
>tries to cook soup
>burns the water

Which satyr would be the most terrifyingly inept at cooking?

Trips get.

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>>27131001
Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!

>>27130998

Simmer

>>27110108
Where does the human part end and the horse part begin

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>>27131043
For strictly horse satyrs? A little underneath the navel. Pegasi have wings, but that's usually it. Other satyrs, though, vary.

>>27131020
Bucky may be bad too. He's never bothered cooking since he just eats whatever his sisters fix him if he whines enough. If that doesn't work there's always T.V. dinners.

>>27130969
>Yuzu hops on one leg, dressed in rags while pulling a stupid face and pretending to jerk off two imaginary cocks on either side of her face with its deliberatly smeared makeup.
"Is this okay? Please tell me I'm un-cute enough now so I can go home."
>Dawn narrows her eyes for a moment, not entirely convinced.
>"I dunno, let me ask the magic mirror."
>Walking over to the wall, the young princess pulls a sheet away and unveils the magical relic in question.
>"Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who's the cutest of-"
>"Not you, you crazy fuck! Holy shit, what's wrong with you? You're one grade A messed up bitch, you know that? I mean damn, nigga! I get that you have daddy issues, gurl, but this shit ain't-"
>Dawn hurriedly throws the sheet back over the mirror, silencing it.
>Turing back to Yuzu, the princess clears her throat, slightly embarrassed.
>"Well... I suppose we'll just have to try something else."
>Yuzu whimpers slightly her hopes of being home in time for dinner quickly vanishing.
>"Oh, and uh... just so you know, I don't actually have daddy issues. My relationship with my father is... healthy."

>>27131043
See >>27122617

>>27131114
>sisters
>Not mother
Why, anon?

>>27131140
Because his Mom wants Bucky to stop lazing around the house and be productive! Make a man out of himself and start taking pride in good, honest work. Not loafing on some fancy dream of being star Hoofball player.

>>27131020
Only in his youth. He'll get damn good at it when he grows up. So good that he opens up his own little restaurant.

>>27110108
>>>27131020
>Only in his youth. He'll get damn good at it when he grows up. So good that he opens up his own little restaurant.
That's more Broil than Simmer, I'd say. She likes to eat like her Mom, and Fizzle actually allows her to be in the kitchen while he cooks. (It was for Simmer's own good he was banned from the kitchen).

>>27131247
With Blare? Or Broil? What would it be called?

>>27131122
>My relationship with my father is... healthy.
She insists as she feels their child kick.

>>27131390
The Gilded Drake's?

MT made some stuff
https://derpiboo.ru/1135760?scope=scpedfe823330d106f082641bb168c0a040cc0c70e30
https://derpiboo.ru/1135758?scope=scpedfe823330d106f082641bb168c0a040cc0c70e30

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Merry Christmas, guys.

Loads of new satyr art lately.

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>>27131808
Forgot one

>>27131976

Why does Thron look stoned out of her mind?

>>27132006
She might be. Or maybe she has resting stoner face.

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>>27131969
Just lots of stuff that wasn't up before.

>>27132006
Maybe she's intoxicated by Mudpie's presence?

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I just realized that Ash's design looks similar to Cinder's in a way.

>>27132077
No really. Feminine shape, a little.

>>27132100
But she does with the scale placement and clothing.

>>27132135
Ash seems to have wings, Cinder doesn't.
The clothes? You're bound to have two or more people wearing similar clothes some days.
The scales... Well, if that bothers you, then simply make a few tiny changes on Ash? Not all satyrs can be perfect on the first day they're created.

>>27132251
I'm not saying it bothers me, just making an observation

>>27132135
>Scale Placement
You mean beings of the same species would have similar scale/hair/limb placement?

>Clothes
... That... Those are not part of a body. You can change clothes.

>Hair and face
What really matters. They are different.

>>27132077
Well, they're both drakes.

>>27131976
So, are these two slamming clams or what?

>>27133183
I'm always surprised we don't see any interaction with Mudpie and Starburst.

>>27129978
>"It's comes naturally to you, cupcake."
"Aww, thanks daddy. You can do me bareback tonight."
>"What?"

>>27133253
"I said you can do me bareback. You know, I mean you don't have to wear a shirt when you give me my goodnight piggyback ride to bed before you tuck me in."

>>27133364
>Before she came out and admitted her feelings, Yuzu made a lot of innuendo towards her dad to gauge his reaction.

Most employable satyr, go!

>>27133691
Desirae. She's a productivity queen, just like her mother.

>>27133691
Darcy. Strong work ethic, reliable, mature, punctual and has thighs that can crunch a walnut.

>>27133764
Huh, I meant to type "crush a walnut" but I guess that works too. Autocorrect is a pain sometimes.

>>27133691
>>27133744
This, Changetyrs, Timber, and Sapphire.

So which satyrs are most likely to end up as hopeless, unemployed drunks with no prospects for the future and probable substance abuse problems?

Keep in mind that if you name my daughteru, I'll fite you irl.

>>27133846
Ace, Yuzu, Gumdrop, and Muddle.

>>27133869
Why Yuzu? I mean I get that maybe she's a little too dependent on her dad, but I'm pretty sure she'd make a killing as a high class escort if it came to it and she had no other options.

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I'm not sorry for this.

>Ash carefully runs down her checklist, ensuring she has everything she needs.
>Clean water, flat surfaces, bandages, ample supplies of hardwood chips and a wickedly sharp knife.
>Taking a deep breath, the dragoness grabs her tail, gives it a rough tug, and clenches all the muscles in the base as tightly as she's able.
>The ring of bone, scales and tendon quickly split at natural weak points as her tail is seperated from her body.
>Pain rolls up her spine, but to a significantly less degree than the grisly scene would imply.
>Quickly collecting her composure, Ash jumps onto the amputated appendage, holding it still as it tries to thrash, fearful of the powerful muscles damaging the house.
>Finally, the misfiring nerves dye down and the tail goes still.
>Wiping the sweat from her brow, the young dragoness quickly cleans and bandages her new stump.
>Though a feeling of loss tinges her thoughts, knowing it will be several months before her tail fully regrows, she's sure it will be worth it.
>After taking a moment to adjust to her altered center of gravity, Ash produces her knife, made from worked dragon bone, and carefully begins cutting.
>First, the valuable scales are seperated from the flesh and laid out to be dried, before the flesh is sliced between the bone segments.
>In the end, several slabs and the tapered tip remain.
>The slabs quickly find themselves on the large, dragon fire fed grill pit, while the tip finds itself in a stew pot above it.

>>27133892
Being cute and having fluffy ears aren't skills that'll readily land you employment. Is she even good at anything? What's her education like and does she have any trade knowledge?

>>27133924
>The better part of the day is spent nursing her wound, and tending the flames in an attempt to cook the heat resistant flesh.
>But finally, deep into the night, it's done. The rare cooked flesh is pulled from the coals and brought inside.
>Setting the steaks and stew on the smooth marble counter, she looks around, not seeing her father anywhere in the den she shares with him.
"DAD! Can you come here?"
>Minutes later, the man makes his way into the room from the chamber where the woman keeps her modest horde. Though aging, he retains an appearance of youth.
>"Yeah?" he begins grogily?
"I made dinner. Your favorite!"
>"My favorite? I...Oh." he trails off with realization as he notices the stump of her tail. "Oh, Ash, you didn't need to do that for me." he says a little sadly.
>A few moments pass in silence before he gives the half-dragon a kiss on her forehead.
>"Thank you."

>>27133869

>Ace

Explain

>>27133764
>Walnuts
>Not watermelon
One job
>>27133846
Bucky, most likely. Simmer, Rory, or Mumble if the depression hits them hard enough. Blare has...issues she need to work out first.

>>27133945
All her life she has been conditioned to BE a wonderbolt. Ever since she was a baby, she's been pidgeon holed into it. Here's the thing; the Wonderbolts are a group of high speed Pegasus performers. Ace is a high speed Pegasatyr. Look at some factors. Possibly the oldest Pegasatyr, meaning she would likely be the first to TRY and apply, meaning no diversity hires before her. She is not a pegasus. A pegasatyr, yes, but only half Pegasus. Half won't be good enough. Her other half is human. Normal human. Normal, not magic, not cartoon physics, not able to withstand the kind of high speed a Pegasus (breaking the sound barrier in Equestria) can handle without some form of SPECIAL suit. See the suits the wonderbolts wear? Skin tight. No additions. Nothing keeping them safe fro those speeds, because they can already handle it. Wearing more would slow them down; choosing style or safety over speed. Meaning the chance of her actually being a Wonderbolt is near zero. If there were many before her, slowly wittling down their will until they allowed Pegasatyrs in, maybe. But she is the oldest. Hell, how do we know there aren't Gryphons who haven't tried becoming Wonderbolts only to get shot down? Could be even longer for satyrs then. Back to the point; her being pidgeon holed into being "the best wonderbolt ever" As some people just love to point out and then facing a firm and swift rejection... You know those guys who lost their girls then join the military? Rejection and loss make people desperate for an out. Substances are a common out.

>>27133932
Nope. Just cute, fluffy ears, and a daddy's girl... The world is gonna eat her alive.

>Naming Ember's Satyr daughter "Ash"

You all asked for this.

>Be Grogar the Necromancer
>Have a massive army of darkness ready to fuck up Equestria
>Now if only you could get your hooves on the Neighcronomicon to complete your power-
>BOOM!
>Your forces are under attack!
>With a teleportation spell, you find the source of who is felling your army in droves and find a dragon-human hybrid with a firearm in one hand and a motorized blade-... Replacing the other
"YOU DARE INTERFERE IN MY PLANS?"
>She stops, turns and gives you an unsettlingly mad look in her eyes, as if there is nothing you could do to drive her further over the edge
>Single handedly readying her breech-loaded blunderbuss, she looks levels it at you and says: "Buckle up, bonehead, you're going for a ride."

>>27134090
Well on the bright side there's always porn. Dirty, degrading porn.

>Recent releases Yuzu's starred in -

Satyr Whores XIV
Daddy's Girl XXX
Halfbreed Sluts Gone Wild - Xtreme Edition
The Secret Diary of an Electra
Backdoor Bat Babes 9
College Lesbian Orgy
My Boyfriend is a Diamond Dog (AKA "Feel the Knott")

And her dad still thinks she's in college learning to become a hairdresser.

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>>27134237
But those weren't even professional works.

A bunch of Satyrs just noticed they filmed their sexcapades a lot and decided to try selling copies.

And Pogo's body was never found until the next day. Drained of all his semen with brown feathers found around him. Ponyville suspects a sex vampire is on the loose and warns everyone to keep their windows shut at night and invite no strange ponies or satyrs into their home after sunset.

>>27133892
>>27133932
Yuzu's actually worse than just having no skills. She got a degree in English.

>>27134237
Whoa. Shit just got too real. Is the thread even allowed to get real?

>>27134076

I always wanted her and Icarus to get it just to say she did, but as it turns out they only got in because they're Satyrs and not really because of their abilities less affirmative action and more as she's a freak to draw crowds in. Like geeks from old circuses, but Icarus leaves on his own accord before word gets out that it's all just a farce.

I don't put much thought into the physics behind flying. When we have Dark Matter butterflies and other cartoon physics I just go with it.

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>>27113671
>FemAnon watched Zootopia
>Wanted to fuck the bunny
>Angel is right next to her grinning and FemAnon decides to settle hard
>A few months later, the picture happens.

>>27113941
Unless ponyville's MASSIVELY expanded by the time even just Darcy's siblings are school age, they can just walk like Applebloom.

>>27134326
That's still better than some liberal arts degree in feminist studies, or whatever it's called.

I studied psychology because I had an interest in it, and even though things have worked out pretty damn well for me, I still wish I'd taken something actually valuable and useful in the real world, like engineering.

The only people who actually need psychologists are rich middle aged housewives who need somebody to complain to and have listen to their insufferable whining for an ungodly amount of cash in exchange.

>>27134577
Did you get your Bachelor's or Master's?

>>27134591
Bachelor of Science. I decided not to pursue it any further after I was offered a well paying job with flexible hours that was close to home and had good promotion prospects and benifits.

I really wish I hadn't wasted those years learning something I've never even needed to use since. I could go on and complain some more, but I realize this has literally nothing to do with satyrs and is probably going to annoy some people.

>>27134666

Which Satyr would be the most into Psychology Satan?

I say Sweet Dreams

>>27134666
Devil trips says you must continue shitting up the thread with your bitching.

>>27134666
Nice blog update, Satan. I didn't realize being lord of Hell was such a sweet deal.

>>27134373
i.e: because my characters are special snowflakes and deserve that treatmemt, even though it goes agaibst what they would canon do. They are speed demons. Willing to drop Soarin for Rainbow Dash, just to win a race. They're "winners", not a freak show.

>>27134682

Wait what.

I think being lead on to believe you're valuable only to realize they only want you to show you off as a freak is worse than flat out rejection.

Of course I believe they could perform just as well as a Pegasus could, but whatever.

I believe they were in the right to cut Soarin, but that's just me.

>>27134750
You imply they would even give them a chance. "Yeah, we can make money off these freaks, all we have to do is associatte with them!" Like they actually would.

>>27134765

Never underestimate greed, brolio.

Just give them enough lip service so they'll keep thinking they're part of the team or whatever and rake in the dosh as people come in to see your special snowflakes.

>>27134804
So twist canon personalities so hard until they fit your narrative. Gotcha.

>>27134858
Hm, to be fair, it would depend on who the hell is running the Wonderbolts by the time any of the pegasatyrs are old enough to try.

Dash, Spitfire, Soarin, Fleetfoot, etc. might be retirement age by that point given how physically demanding flying competitively would be.

Unless you mean something like Spitfire would shoot down her own kids after spending a lifetime building them up.

Because that would be seriously fucked up.

>>27134858

Did I say anything about them not being able to perform?

I don't read too much into it because the show has magic and cartoon physics. So I go with whatever. I should have said "not because they really want her," or something instead of "not based on her abilities." But that's my fault.

Ace and Icarus are able to perform just fine.

But they see them as a cash cow to milk, nothing more. They wouldn't care about either of them as people or athletes. Just money makers.

>>27134930

That's what I was thinking. All of them are retired and out of there by the time someone comes in and decides to milk them for all they're worth. Yeah it might have started out a little differently, but whoever is the second or third person after Spitfire would be thinking with their wallet.

>>27134930
Actually, if I recall, there was some green that someone wrote where Spitfire shot down Ace because she wasn't as commited. She still has stuff she likes to do that'll have to be put off due to Wonderbolt training full time.

>>27134930
She would HAVE to be retired, well past her prime. Like her mom. Plus, it would create a conflict of interests if she interviewed her own kids.

>>27134972
That's at least reasonable.
>spitfire: Ace, after training you your whole life to be a wonderbolt, I'm afraid it just wasn't enough because even if you filled out the application and such, it feels like you're just going through the motions and don't really want to do this. So I guess I fucked up as a mother a bit pushing you towards one thing, but I think it's time to remove the levies and let your river flow where you want to.

Compared to...

>Spitfire: Well, Ace, I've trained you your whole life to be a wonderbolt, you've showed talent and dedication but you're physically incapable of achieving our levels, something we would have known for a long time now but I decided to wait to spring this on you. You can blame your father for this by the way, and not me in any way for submitting myself to monkey dick.

>>27135006

>You can blame your father for this by the way, and not me in any way for submitting myself to monkey dick.

>a Swede saying an immigrant is in the wrong

You're right, that is bullshit.

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>>27134986
Then what canon personalities is the other guy twisting? All the canon pegasi from the WBs would have probably retired, or at least not as actively involved anymore and wouldn't realize their kids are being manipulated.

All in all though, maybe the new guard of the Wonderbolts would block satyrs.

Then Ace, Hotshot, etc. They decide to found their own flying team which would include not just satyrs, but griffons, batponies, and other pegasi. They might not be as fast (all the time) but together they perform stunts a pure-pegasi team alone would never be capable of.

And then for ultimate justice, the Wonderbolts are cut from government funding and forced to go private, then end up bought up by the new team.

>>27135035
Bat ponies might just be a rarer species, and griffons were outright stated to be rare in Equestria in season 1.
So maybe it's either lack of applicants or good ol' pony racism that's preventing any other species in the wonderbolts.

Because I find it hard to believe that ponies, with their dumpy body shape would be, on average, better fliers than comparatively sleek griffins or satyrs.

>>27135094
Why? * M A G I C ! *

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>>27135094
honestly, given how Season 5 (and apparently this season) had Twilight and friends traveling, being all diplomatic, I wouldn't be surprised if ponies, if not mildly racist (it took a supernatural death threat to make the three pony races work together) are heavily isolationist.

I mean ponies apparently knew jack shit about Griffonstone for hundreds of years, they never bothered to learn dragons do apparently have a society, they've never dealt with Yakyakistan before. Common citizens apparently have never even heard of zebras.

It all doesn't paint a pretty picture for Equestria pre-Twilight's Glasnost policies. (Well, she is the princess of Friendship, guess Celestia and Luna coast solely on charisma score for diplomacy checks)

I actually had planned to use this in a fanfic I was writing prior to season 5 where Equestria's insularness caused them (along with several other countries) to get their asses kicked in a war because for all their talks of friendship and harmony, Saddle Arabia was their ONLY national ally.

>>27135174
Rarity also had no idea what diamond dogs were.

>>27135197
all this in mind, I could practically see how human contact in a multi-satyr scenario went down.

>random pone: "The fuck is that?"
>Anon: "I'm a human."
>Twilight: "Right, you're coming with me, telling me everything about yourself, your people, your culture and we're going to make some diplomatic connections and cram down every bit of information down the throats of ponies everywhere because I am sick up to HERE of Celestia not telling us about this shit and ponies everywhere not having a bumfuck clue what the hell something potentially important is!"

Well, this discounts Equestria girls as a thing.

>>27135229
Then become the worlds greatest seedslinger, impregnating far and wide.

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>>27135174

I had an idea involving the not-UN for something here. It would have had Diamond Dogs, Caribou, Saddle Arabians, Griffons, Yaks (after S4), Dragons (after S5), and maybe a few others (Zebras, for example).

But part of what helps Equesteia is they have two demigods who control the heavenly bodies ignoring the fact they job left and right so they could literally fuck the rest of the world over if they wanted, and a reality warper who is sorta on their side.

Not-Odin would have more or less said that to someone, along with "it would be costly for both sides, and things are going well for both sides in terms of land and resources, so there's really no need for it."

>>27135254
well, I more meant to imply Twilight proceeds to meet and greet every human who crops up, straps Celestia, Luna, and Cadance down to speak with human leaders, and broadcasts PSAs across Equestria about humans to make sure everyone is up to speed.

Which leads to the thought of Twilight's later negotiations with actual leaders.

"Sooo... Mister.. 'President', is it? I'm interested in buying a few of those really really nice looking machines your space program uses."
>"Now- Princess Sparkle? Okay, good. We can't just sell plans to the space shuttle, those were comissioned from private corporations, you'd need to talk to them and then work with their subcontractors-"
"See this tiny, little glowing crystal in the copper-cap ended vacuum tube? It's an Equestrian version of a battery that I invented. It's capable of sustaining a power output of three zettawatts for over seventy two hours of continuous use. It's a green energy and more stable than C4, and I've got thousands of these babies ready. As you can tell, i'm smart, I could probably figure out this space shuttle thing on my own with time, time I don't want to waste. Can you afford to let thousands of zettawatts of power remain unaccessible to the American federal agencies?"

>>27135261
>they could literally fuck the rest of the world over if they wanted
Not without fucking themselves.

>>27135347
I wouldn't read it, but whatever floats your boat.

>>27135261
>>27135350
indeed, in some ways though, being all-powerful in a political game feels like it would HURT your diplomatic abilities. People choose to try to ignore you than deal with you because you them, any attempts to deal with you will always come at a net loss for them.

So along comes Twilight who is perceived as less powerful, less experienced, but also personable and accommodating to others. And thus, Twilight's sphere as a princess is "friendship" in the respect of being "diplomatic and ambassadorial services".

oh, and it gets better when she sends her non-princess friends who don't even possess high-level unicorn bullshit powers.

>>27135350

If they switched to Alaska-like days with a few hours of sunlight it might work.

My idea was park the sun over an enemy and make it be like the height of Summer in Florida for 20+ hours of the day for several months.

I thought of that after I posted. But when it's canon that Equestria has slap fights and combat hugging in actual war it's hard to justify a reason why people haven't decided to attack them other than "It's too much of a bother."

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Well, bottomline is that I'm going to say as far as Satyrs in the wonderbolts go myself, it's equal parts likely they would be discriminated against in one form or another as they would be allowed after proving themselves.

Ponies have shown themselves to be capable of being assholes in the past.

But this is just my opinion. I myself increasingly like the idea Ace and Hotshot might find their own way instead just following Mom.

Stormwalker though was highly sought, but opted instead for a life of protecting earth and Equestria from cosmic forces of evil and gaining power levels.

>>27135519
That spoiler seems really silly to me. How'd she get the power?

>>27135650

She watched nothing but Dragonball Z when she was younger, trained hard, and ate her wheaties

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>>27135650
Training. Screaming. A lot of screaming. Even more training. A Hyperbolic time chamber. Learning dangerous, forbidden techniques that will potentially kill her and will become obsolete by next season, eating three times her bodymass in food per-meal, and rigorous hair care for that extra-crazy shonen look.

Oh, also being oblivious to all romantic advances.

And flunking out of every academic course she could that wasn't basic reading and writing.

And even more screaming.

Such is the life of a shonen hero.

>>27135650
See >>27135689
But she also took a magic suppository as a kid. It currd her mumps AND made her shonen.

>>27135689
>>27135704
Nah, actually bothering with nutrition like taking vitamins is more Herc's thing. He also gains his power by saying his prayers, being true to himself and true to his country.

Also, his fans getting hyped makes him "Herc-Out" and get even stronger.

>>27135757
>Stormwalker and Herc confirmed for professsional wrestling

>>27135870

What are their stage names?

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>>27135870
But does either have what it takes to demask and shame the champ?

>>27135689
>>27135704
>>27135690
How seriously do you take this? I'd get a kick out of a story with Sentai Shouen Stormwalker.

>>27135988
So serious, it's already confirmed for 10 seasons AND filler.

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>>27136038
>10 seasons and filler
>Not ten seasons OF filler and 20 seasons of actual episodes

>>27135988
not quite to that level, but I do tend to depict Stormwalker as probably the strongest and most willful satyr in my own satyr-verse. Hope might be more experienced, the princess Satyrs might have magic, Simmer and Broil might be physically stronger, Utah might be quicker, but Stormwalker WILL. NOT. LOSE. EVER.

in my head, this is basically her theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jIWGZLqcOnA

And all because someone made her look like a shonen protagonist.

>>27135910
This might be the one fight she can't win though.

I mean maybe if Darcy wasn't fighting to protect her identity and for the honor of the mask, maybe. But no, she is powered by the glory, honor, and tradition of all lucha before her.

>>27130684
>you should do Toriyama-style more often
The funny thing is, I started out drawing DBZ so for a time, I only drew in that style. Then I discovered Tenchi Muyo, then Cowboy Bebop, then Slayers, etc.

What do the depressed satyrs do when they're depressed? Something that's unique to them in addition to the common symptoms of depression. How long does their depressive episode last? How do they cope? When was the last time you saw them cry?

>>27136924

Dawn locks herself in her room and surrounds herself with her plush toys. It all depends on what caused her to be depressed in the first place. She doesn't cry often but when she does it's usually a long string of quiet sobbing and whimpering.

Radiance hides somewhere, usually in response to the demands of being a prince, and it lasts until whatever it was blows over and someone else ends up taking care of it. He usually gets misty eyed but not full fledged crying.

Sirius is in a similar vein as Dawn in that he goes to his room, but he usually ends up doing stuff with his model trains and city he's built. He thinks things would be a lot more efficient if he was in charge and not given all the shitty jobs. He doesn't cry.

I got nothing for Selena. Sorry folks. Same for Blue Bonnet.

>>27136846
>>27137295

>>27137392
well, if you don't mind me helping you:

>Selene goes caffeine junkie, downing quantities of "Nurse's Brew Coffee" that would kill her if she wasn't an alicorn satyr, during these caffeine highs she tries to busy herself with as many thing as possible. Once the crash kicks in though she'll break down into tears at the mess she's caused along with whatever depressed her

>Blue Bonnet gets ULTRA-MEGA bitchy, and very nearly physically abusive of everyone around her. She is aware just how damaging her depressed rages are and will usually isolate herself beforehand. But once alone she's been known to scream at the top of her lungs in empty rooms of the castle and hurl old furniture. She cries during this, but do not think her any safer for it. She's easiest to approach AFTER the storm

>Glimmer commits herself to her books. She becomes completely cut off from the world and may even start projecting a telekinetic shield to block others out. She becomes much more dangerous to herself during these times as she'll forget to eat or drink for nearly days on end requiring parental intervention. Glimmer doesn't cry though

>Rory just... Breaks. He'll crumple to the floor and begin sobbing uncontrollably, the latent, raw magic in his blood causing him to fill the area around him with arcane lightning requiring protection to approach him safely. Though his worst breakdowns don't involve crying, but an outright neurotic overload that sends him into seizures and will leave him temporarily paraplegic.

>>27136924
Gumdrop just completely shuts down, only making the effort to complete essential biological requirements, and only as often as she has to.

Even her dad can't shake her out of that funk, but at least she'll acknowledge him. All he can really do is make sure she eats, and prod her to bathe every couple of days. She usually snaps out of it within a week, though.

>>27137477
I like these.

>Mumble drowns herself in her secret stash of cheap booze Pinkie usually buys for the more grown up party she hosts. She holes up in her pitch black room and ruminates about all the things that she hates about herself until she gets dizzy and falls asleep on the bed.

Icarus faps the hurt away.