Satyr Abomination Thread #138: Hello Darkness My Old Friend Edition

>>25484929
We already had this edition.

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Reminder that you'll never be the knight that protects your daughteru

>>25484346
Overly attached twins are cute though. Even when they're boys. especially when they're boys

>>25485390
>Ami and Ume
>Nothing in the Name list
>Searching in the last five threads shows nothing
Did you guys seriously just make up two more satyrs out of thin air right now?! Or did I miss something?

>>25485705
If I remember right, they're dazzling satyrs.
Which means that they get zero mentions ever because they're not canon.

>>25485705
https://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23963507/#24011135
This, some guy doing personality refs, and the occasional discussion is all we got.

>>25485796
You mean this 3 post thing done by the same guy? https://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25134984/#25164625

>>25485705
>making up satyrs out of thin air
Should happen more often so we get more reactions like this.

>>25485726
Neither is Eventide or Yuzu (assuming her mother is the bat pony)

>>25485862
Are you serious? If so, I could totally do that. Even throw in the super background satyrs and see if people even notice.

>>25485877
>You serious?
Only partially. I wouldn't mind throwing a few more 'literally who?'s into my own stuff.
Also, checked.

>>25485705

Dude that's how it's always been for every satyr besides the first seven, it's like every day there's a new one and honestly it doesn't even matter

>>25485939

>tfw create "literally who," Satyrs
>tfw try to write but hate everything I put down
>tfw I will never live up to my expectations

Hold me.

>>25485067
What happened to those cool knight anon pics that were of various Anons that were the knights of friendship? Those were cool, would have been cool to have seen more of them or even a story really.

>>25487514
Just. DO. It.

Literally that, you just keep writing Anon, yeah you'll get shat on, but for your daughteru/sonfu it's worth it in the end.

Though Cider and Hope are best daughterus and any thing else is /trash/Cept Darcy she's cool, she can come and over and fuck my sister.

>>25489095

How do you think Garret and Laika met? How did he or she, ask the other out?

>>25489227
Garret and Laika dating? Is this a thing?

>>25489392
To a couple few
It'll be everyone if they force it enough
*clap. clap.*
Oh good. That still works.

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>>25489488
It's not like it's out of nowhere, Rarity actually interacted with Diamond Dogs and talked to them in that episode, remember?

>>25489525
I forgot that's how things work around here. My bad.

>>25489392
Its been mentioned pretty often.

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>>25483837
>Conventional means of travel still reigns supreme in Equestria. Ponies knew this, griffons and diamond dogs knew this. Heck, even dragons that are typically smaller than your average elder dragon.
>That's why Fizzle inspects all the family luggage for their annual vacation.
>"All set for the beach, Broilly Polly?" Fizzle is stuffing a cooler in the trunk of the van when he hears a groan behind him.
>"Papa, that doesn't even rhyme." Broil said trudging her way in her swimsuit to toss a beat-up guitar in.
>"It does in my book."
>"Oh yeah? What book is that?"
>"Uh, the first edition dragon dad book? It comes free with shipping on every delivery."
>"Whatcha get?"
>Fizzle flashes those dashing dagger for teeth as he smiles. "Two for one special on twin drakes."
>"Oh-pfft!" Broil crosses her arms in disappointment, shaking her head with a playful smirk. "You should deserve refund just on how terrible that joke was!"
>"What?" Fizzle gasped a pained breath and pressed a claw to his chest. "That can't be it! According to chapter thirty-two these jokes are crucial to a dragon child's development!"
>She's about to make a comeback until she laughs when Fizzle tickles her with his snout.
>"He-hey! Stop, Papa, your breath tickles!"
>"T-that's-hah-real cute...you two!"
>Simmer wobbles over in his swimwear with a massive greatsword, teetering over side to side before tossing (and falling) it in with a resounding *CLUNK*, right ontop of the other assorted tools piled up next to the luggage.
>"Ah mon Dieu..." Broil kneels down and helps her twin up.
>Fizzle rolls his eyes. "Your mother's preparation kit," he says with a nonchalant huff of smoke.
>"She always packs this stuff whenever we go to the beach, Papa." Simmer said with a sigh. "Life preservers, nets...who even uses this ungodly amount of rope? And-hey! That's the same spear that got us kicked out from the resort!"
(1/7)

>>25490087
>"Buckskin Bay." Fizzle smiled. Hazy memories of family bonfires, salty fish, mai-tais, and 'private beach time' rushing to his head are interupted by his wife sprinting towards the the car.
>"Yoohoo!" She waves with a smile. "Are we ready to head out?"
>"O-oui Mama, we are set. But..." He rubbed his tail and pointed at the small briefcase she was carrying. "Is that all you're wearing? B-because it looks pretty...sparse...considering how long we'll be there for."
>"Y-yeah honey," Fizzle clears his throat as his face turns as pink as his eyes. "It'd b-be a shame if you were left with just your...swimsuit...o-on."
>Her mother raises her eyebrow as well as the case. "What, this? Oh no no, mon petit ange!" She laughs and taps its side. "This is my first aid kit. We have to keep safe after all. Bandages, antiseptics, dressings, a pocket mask...oh, I even have a few healing potions in here! A kind zebra sold me the ingredients for a steal after dealing with her Fiendswood problem."
>Broil and Simmer exchange an uneasy glance and look back towards their mother.
>"Mama," Simmer starts, "jé suis désolé, mais..."
>"...You seem pretty paranoid everytime we head to towards the beach," Broil finshes while scratching her head.
>"I mean, it's not like we're accident prone..." Simmer puffs up his cheeks and fidgets with his fingers.
>"...Or get hurt really easily," Broil says with an assured smile.
>Their mother blinks and scoffs playfully before putting a hand on her tilted hip. "Is that so?"
>"A-and!" Simmer says. "I don't think a family vacation should consists of spears-"
>"Nope," says Broil.
>"Or swords-"
>"Non."
>"Or ten pounds of Hellcow carcass," Fizzle interjected from the car, "that is prohibited from consumption!"
>But the matriach just sighs and shakes her head. "Alright, first of all, that was one time Fizzle!"
>The dragon sulks in his seat and switches on the car radio.
>"Mes petits anges, have I told you the story of my time in the Grittish Isles?"
(2/4)

>>25490107
>"No, ma'am. Why?" Broil took an exaggerated gasp and wagged her tail "Is it gonna be about adventure?"
>"Oh, trust me, this will be quick. It was seven years after I finished my training, no? My teammates and I were being dispatched all over Equestria, usually fighting back monsters that were terrorizing small defenseless towns."
>She crouches down and Simmer and Broil sit down on the ground after seeing their mother do the same.
>"I must confess, I was cockier back then, brasher. But to my credit, my entire team was when we only had four close calls in nearly all of our ten years together. And so, we demanded to enlist in higher missions. Well! The next thing we knew we were on the coast of the Grittish Isle in a pessant fishing town that's was reported to have a sea monster terrorizing the townsfolk."
>"Wait a minute," Broil says with her raised hand. "You mean you fought a sea monster before?"
>"A deep sea monster, oui. It was an extraordinary rarity to be pitted against one, so we felt particularly special that day. Long story short, we had to use lots of meaty, bloody, bait and stash it on the side of another ship to lure it out in the open to fight it.
>"Now." She leans closer to the two, eager for more story. "Can you guess what happened?"
>"It was just a giant porpoise?"
>"It was a mechanical contraption?"
>"It had a heart of gold?"
>"It ate the food you got it?"
>The mother pokes their forheads for each wrong answer. "No, non, nyet, and," she stops soon as Broil preemptively flinches her hands up. "Yes."
>"What? I got it?" She smiled and cheered silently as she gave a self-congratulatory fist pump.
>"In a nutshell. It didn't just eat the bait on the size, however. No, it ate the whole vessal."
>"The whole t-thing?" Simmer said while biting on the middle of of his finger. "Was it like a dinghy?"
(3/4)

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>>25490125
>"No," she chuckles. "It ate an entire whaling ship. Lunged up and chomped the whole entire with long, massive sharp jaws of teeth. And that was an adolescent!"
>She slumps over and sputters her lips. "Mon dieu. Eventually, we called in the more experienced and older hunters, minotaurs from the island homebase, and got it killed after hours of fighting."
>"A-an entire ship."
>"The scary part is?" She gets out her Bestiary book and flips to the last chapter. "That was only one of the three deep sea monsters identified. The rest are too rare, too threatening to gather information, or too deep to get anywhere in position and are able to fight well."
>Simmer looked positively green. "That doesn't t-t-that mean t-they'll attack often, right?"
>With a heft their mother shrugs her shoulders. "It's not unlikely, Simmer sweetie. To this day I'm scared to be in big open waters. Now; allonsy!" She picks up the frozen Simmer from off the ground and kisses his forehead. "The ocean is a frightening thing, oui?"
"D-deep dark ocean?" Simmer squeaked and trembled slightly.
>"Cheer up bud," Broil insisted as she took his hand. "Lets talk about impending doom inside the car, alright?"
>"I hope you brought sunscreen," Fizzle says as his family finally gets seated in the vehicle.
>"Y-yeah, say Dad? Can I carry the spear t-this time? Just this once?"
>"Don't worry bro-bro," Broil said with a squeeze of his hand.
>"Even if we die by the hand-"
>"-Or giant jaws," he says. "Don't over look that part with the razor teeth."
>"Fine. But by the slim chance this thing will surface and kill us off, atleast we'll have one memory to call our own."
>Simmer gave a weak smile and set his hand ontop of hers.
>"Buckskin Bay...?"
>"Buckskin Bay."
>The two of them chuckles softly and lay back in the seats as their mother drives the car for a family time to unwind.
(4/4)

>>25489525
True. I do quite like the idea of them together. I think they would compliment each other perfectly.

>>25490429
>Diamond dog kid dating satyr whose pony parent hates them
>Dragon kid dating a satyr whose pony parent hates them
>Cow kid dating a satyr whose pony parent owns their parent
>Gryphon kid... Actually dating someone whose pony parent likes them
>Another dragon kid dating someone whose pony parent veritably owns their dad
Are Rainbow Dash's kids the only ones who aren't dating a species their pony parent has had a negative experience with? Or are they too busy being shoehorned into the wonderbolts ALMOST as much as Spitfire's kids? ... Almost.

>>25490498

You could argue Maverick and Prism.

>>25490627
Literally never heard mention of that ship before. As far as I am aware, Prism is single.

>>25490498
To be fair, I've never had any expectations surrounding any of the little monsters making it into the Wonderbolts. I just haven't seen it, but other people take it as a given.

>>25490644
... Anon, if I could pat your shoulder and buy you a beer/lunch, I would.

>>25490639

There was some green about it somewhere. It was kinda cute.

>>25490644

It's in the genes.

>>25490651
>Genes = job
>The flawless logic of Asian parents that lead to high suicide rates
THAT'S why Rarity is a fashionista and Pinkie Pie is a baker. It all makes sense now!

>>25490695
... To any writefags out there, please don't write Ace, Hotshot, or the twins offing themselves. Thank you.

>>25490650
It comes out of a different time, Anon. Rules have changed.
>>25490651
Not denying that, but there's issues with taking a predominantly pony history and adding in not-ponies simply for the fact that they're good fliers.
Not to mention the logistics and considerations that have to be made for satyrs as larger creatures, everything from food to materials, training exercises, flight plans; adding in half-humans changes the dynamic dramatically in almost every way. Then there's the question of if the Wonderbolts are a performance team or a circus act when the fliers are satyrs but the handlers are ponies.
I'm certainly not going to say anyone can't write an entire team of Wonderbolt Satyrs, but I've thought that some of the more up front issues would be cause for quickly and occasionally brutally shooting down satyrs who apply.
>>25490704
Too late.

>>25490704
>"High altitude, low opening?"
>"High altitude, low opening."
>"Hoof bump!" "Hoof bump!"

>>25490695

>Children of some of the best flyers in the country who also happen to be good at flying themselves

They've got points in their favor. Plus I'd imagine their parent's connections/name recognition would also help. Not that automatically means they're all going to be in the Bolts Fuck has anyone ever said anything about Prism's flying ability?, or that they even want to be of the WB Satyrs three make it in, even though one eventually drops out. The rest don't makeit or have other ambitions in life.

will I ever be able to cuddle with Yuzu and rub her velvety ears until she falls asleep? Because I don't want to live if I can't...

>>25490734
>Satyrs are heavier and have human physics mixed with pony, not an ideal speed/performance trait
>Humans need suits/machines to perform in higher altitude, which would be expensive and not a smart business move when you have employees who do not need them unless you are going for a diversity hire, in which case, a VERY/violently competitive career.
>Prism has been described as a poor flier and has near 0 interest in improving it
>That being said, people have put her interests as either fashion or study books

>>25490769

>Satyrs are heavier and have human physics mixed with pony, not an ideal speed/performance trait
>Humans need suits/machines to perform in higher altitude, which would be expensive and not a smart business move when you have employees who do not need them unless you are going for a diversity hire, in which case, a VERY/violently competitive career.

I get these, and my only real answer to them is "lolmagic," it's a fairly weak argument.

Part of what I had in mind was also the curiosity factor. Satyrs are a new species and if they can pull their weight, why not show them off?

>>25490803
Same reason you don't take 40 acres and a mule.

>>25490811

what

>>25490730
Halo jumps are so cool
>>25490803
But we've seen creatures that are heavier than ponies fly (dragons, bugbear, possibly griffons) are heavier too and they can fly well too. Even Bulk Biceps, someone who's wings are massively disproportionate to his body size, can fly relatively adequately considering tjis. I don't think satyrs would be negatively affected at all because of their height or weight.

>>25490824
40 acres and a mule: After the civil war, the US government offered the newly freed slaves 40 acres AND a mule. For free. Each. Except it wasn't free and the government ended up taking more than they gave back since the newly freed slaves couldn't maintain the land. Kinda like the housing crisis, but for the sake of satyrs, humans to ponies with satyr performers. The moment satyrs can't pull the same weight as ponies, humans cry racism and either charge insane salaries or sue for wrongful termination. Think what those Tumblr cunts are doing with Sarkeesian and Quinn.

>>25490856
Of those three, only Gryphons have been able to fly WELL. Also, it's not about JUST flying. If that were the case Rainbow Dash, even Fluttershy would be in the Wonderbolts.

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>>25490871
I thought dragons could fly well?

>>25490864

>The moment satyrs can't pull the same weight as ponies, humans cry racism and either charge insane salaries or sue for wrongful termination.

But if they can't perform on par with ponies why hire them in the first place?

>Think what those Tumblr cunts are doing with Sarkeesian and Quinn.

Ah, so take logic out of the equation then.

>>25490895
See the last part of >>25490803
And near exactly. It is not logical, it is emotional. Which is just bad business.
>Showing off
>Muh diversiry
>You misogynistic transphobic pig
Except with just racial slurs.

>>25490909

You quoted me twice

By "show off," I meant it as "Hey want to see this totally new and weird thing we have?" They would be using the Satyrs as a gimmick to attract more people to them. Like an exotic zoo.

>>25490909
>Show off the new thing
... I just now realized that's all entertainment has ever been. Blacks, gangsters, teen angst, mythological romance, now gays and trans... Welp, if anyone needs me, I'll be busy drinking

>>25490930
I know. And thought you were two guys. Asking "why hire them in the first place" kinda made it seem like you didn't get the show off part you mentioned earlier.

>>25490954

I was thinking about it from an average Joe standpoint (if they can't do X, then why hire them to do X?) as opposed to showing them off like a menagerie.

>>25490971
You know what should be shown off
Candy's gigantic head-crushing tits

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>>25491004
Yes.

>>25491004

That is an abrupt change in topic.

>>25491042

>Someone actually wanting to fuck Twist

I don't see it.

>>25491045
>Not wanting to fuck Twist
The nerds girls are the freakiest... Mmph

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>>25491089
Truer words were never spoken. It's usually pic related.

So, any green on /making/ satyrs?

>>25491111
Quads demand

>>25491111
>>25491111
We had one with Spitfire x Anon making Hotshot, and a series of Lyra and Bonbon becoming surrogate mothers with Anon's seed

>>25491111

>Be Anon
>Finally get to Equestria
>Meet pone waifu
"Ay baby, want some szex?"
>"Yes"
>Then sex happened
>It was good
>10 months later a satyr is born
>fin

On a serious note, anyone have ideas on how the various Satyr's parents meet?

>>25491140
Dee and Jay are the result of Vinyl getting fucked like a rabid dog in a dirty club restroom by some Anon she'd just met while out of her mind on ecstasy pills. She was too high to remember who it was that she'd fucked that night, but fortunately the Anon responsible came forward.

Happy families.

>>25491140
Well I always thought Fizzle and Femanon met after she was stationed on Dragon Island after a rogue feral dragon. She didn't really have a place to stay at first, so she found an abandoned cave which coincidentally happened to be Fizzle's. She thought he was absolutely adorable, especially when he tried to scare her off. She and her team eventually finds and slays the rogue dragon and continues crashing in Fizzle's cave uninvited afterwards.

>>25491153

I had a similar idea with Maverick. Dust meets a guy after a show, they drunk fuck, they part ways and she turns out pregnant.

Except the guy never comes forward and Dust has to raise Maverick by herself.

>>25491174
I had it that Lightning Dust married a race car driver a la Speed Racer after they met after a show and raced to see who was the fastest. They conceived Maverick after the race and got married, and then actually planned for Amelia

>>25491203

Does that make Maverick Ricky Bobby?

>>25491221
Hey, dill weed. If you don't chew Big Red, then fuck you.

>>25491121
This is actually my first time seeing a Quad. Oh wow.
>>25491138
That... is a little disappointing. I was hoping for a green where the actual even the satyr is made, the realization of pregnancy, and the birth.

>>25491302
Ohh, I think one of Hope's early stories was like that. Lyra finding out she was pregnant, all the way up to Hope's birth.

>>25491302
>This is actually my first time seeing a Quad
Do you not pay attention to numbers?

On the other note, pony dynamics confuse me when I think about how human the medical decisions they decide to take are despite being ponies. I honestly wouldn't know what to do with the last one, so I've never thought about writing it.

>>25491111
Use your imagination

>>25487972
Can't agree more. Even if it's just a storyline you wanna do, fucking do it.

>>25491045
>>25491089
Pity-fucking.

>>25490856
Would it make more sense that the satyr fliers would just have a longer endurance than their pony contempariers?

After all humanity's prime survival trait aside from problem solving was being an endurance runner, that is when your body was trained for running on and off for twelve hours or something.

>>25492140
You also have to keep in mind that horses are fairly dense in terms of weight, and their dumpy bumblebee body shape is hardly aerodynamic.
Compare that to our hypothetical flying humanoid. Provided they could maintain flight with their body in a horizontal position, they could fly with comparatively little air resistance.

>>25492140

>endurance

Also a reason why human males got all the mares.

>>25490178
I really enjoy reading stories where the whole family is interacting with each other.

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>Backround satyrs do a roast of stupid asshole satyrs. What do they say?

>>25492880
To Hope, from Desirae
>"I haven't seen an eldest child so ignored since Timber was born."

>>25492880
To Mumble, from Cherry Jubilee:
>"If I had tits like yours and had the gall to mope around, I'd no sooner poke my eyes out with a needle and bash my head against Thomas Payne's "Common Sense", since clearly I'd be too blind and dumb to see what I've got going for me."

>>25492880
To Mistake, from Hotshot
>"Poppa always told me that whistling made the day go by faster. Breezy afternoons must just fly by for you."

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>>25493100
>obligatory Hotshot post

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>>25493337
>Obligatory Simmer post

>>25493337
>>25493376
Wow, you two are fun

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>>25493402
>Obligatory butthurt/drakefag apologist post

>>25492880
To Simmer, from Ace
>"People say Simmer is so pretty, he'd make a hot ass girl. I say they're wrong, that pocket rocket ruins everything."

>>25492880
to Yuzu from Broil
>"People keep saying how they wanna pet Yuzu's ears. She isn't the only one with fuzzy fluffy ears, she's just the one with the most daddy incest appeal. Hey! It's not my fault I CAN get so much dick... And PUSS-EYY!"

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I don't visit the satyr threads that often, but I noticed that you have a Cadance satyr. How does that work considering she's married to Shining and is pregnant in canon?

>>25493501
Cheat baby, either before Cadence was married (which people lean to), or after. She lives with her dad.

>>25493523

So is Cadance just a deadbeat mom or something?

>>25493528
Kinda, but more denying it happened. So less deadbeat, more hurtfully hateful.

>>25492880
To Darcy, from Pear
>"I...you, uh...Aw shucks, I'm sorry y'all, I can't bring myself to disrespect my kin!"
>("Yea' yea', move aside before ya hurt yerself.")

To Darcy, from Lola
>"Whenever we come over 'n ya try to get us to taste yer burnt Spanish dishes, my brain gets confused fer a moment and wonders if there's a Mexican family wonderin' how a stetson wearing apple chewing cowgirl got mixed up with their daughtah."

>>25493543

Wow, that must suck for Venus. Any good stories involving her?

>>25493558
Yes. Almost all about Anon being a good single father.

>>25493571
Makes sense, since her mother is married to another stallion.

Do you think that Cadence secretly sends Venus presents on her birthdays?

>>25493495
>>25493442
>>25493100
These don't sound like background satyrs at all. Not to mention >>25493442 sounds less like a roast and more of a subtle compliment about his junk

>>25493571

That sounds cute, but it also sounds like it could get boring after a while. Any stories about Twilight meeting Venus for the first time, noticing the resemblance to Cadance, and then confronting her sister-in-law about it?

>>25493578

Considering this>>25493543 I'd say no. She probably just sends Anon child support at the most.

>>25493601
>it also sounds like it could get boring after a while
If it goes on for more than one post, yeah.

>>25493601
Ohhhh, tgey should Peggy Hill it. Where she doesn't notice until someone spells it out for her.

>Child support
>"Why? It's not my kid."

>>25493601
There was this really good one where Anon goes to a con with Venus where she meets Shining Armor and they talk about Hyperspace Hyperwars. Also Dagger meeting Venus when?

>>25493601
>She probably just sends Anon child support at the most.
That plus a note that tells him to buy something wonderful for Venus, and to burn the note when he's done reading it?

>>25493618

Considering how Venus's hair color and the colors of her lower half, it'd be hard to not notice.

>>25493635
Dagger is the Shining Armor satyr, right?

>>25493642
That's depressing.

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>>25493655
Yeah, there was a small story about her the other day that had her as a twenty-something guard instructor that likes to drink, fight, and possibly molest her students. I wasn't sure.

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>>25493495
>daddy incest appeal
You say that like it's a bad thing.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EgVkHjn0yE

>>25493800
When it makes people ignorant of fluffy ears on other girls, it is

>>25493710

Interesting. Perhaps Venus and Dagger meet as small children and become best friends, both of them bemoaning their fate as the unwanted kid.

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>Satyr tries LSD for the first time and peers into their mind's subconcious thought, desires, imaginings, and fears.
>What do they see and experience?

>>25493889
And then they get married because their pony parents are also married!...
I can sort of dig them being friends or hating each other, but best friends? Naah.

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>>25493495
>she's just the one with the most daddy incest appeal
not MY Yuzu

>>25493936
Why would they hate each other?

>>25493812
>fluffy ears on other girls
Why the fuck would the spawn of a human and dragon have fluffy ears? They should be scaly.

>>25493908

>Venus hallucinates that her mother finally loves her and ends up crying when it's over.

>>25494045
I'm going by what >>25493710 said about Dagger loving fights and drinks, and that Venus is usually portrayed as a nice girl who wants everyone to be friends.

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>>25494054
Because it looks as though Fizzle has ear tufts. Why would you give a bird pointed ears?

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>>25494121
I'm actually basing her personality on Vanessa, so it's not like she's particulalry mean spirited or can't appreciate a nice personality. She just tends to get rowdy sometimes.

>Teen Cadence sleeps with Anon and gets pregnant before she meets Shining Armour
>The baby is left in Anon's care
>Teen Shining sleeps with Femanon (She's his teacher)
>Femanon finds out she's pregnant and moves away from Equestria so no one can ever find out that she slept with one of her students
>Venus and Dagger never meet

>>25494269
That works.

>>25493592
Well they're certainly not on the dumb, assholes block.
I'm not bitter, I'm really not.

>>25494299
Hey, I never said that, I'm just saying that they can't be backround satyrs with the amount of attention they get.

>>25493601

Fuck it I'll do a quickie before class.

>Be Twilight Sparkle.
>Princess of Friendship.
>Be in Phillydelphia with your friend Applejack.
>Why? Because the map in your new castle says that the both you need to be here for some reason.
>You've decided not to question it for now.
>The two of you decide to just walk around and enjoy the sights until whatever problem needed fixing presented itself.
>You look at the nearby shops, searching for something to occupy your time.
>Oh! A book store!
>You decide to go inside for a look. Applejack roll her eyes and says that she'll just look for the local Apple Family branch and they'll meet back up in a hour.
>Her loss.
>You go inside, and quickly head for the non-fiction section.
>You start searching for anything you don't have yet, when you notice something odd.
>A teenage satyr girl with wings who appeared to be shopping for school textbooks with an older human man, likely her father.
>This wouldn't be so out of place, except for the fact that her color scheme was A LOT like Cadance.
>Like, almost exactly.
>It was kind of strange.
>Satyrs tend to inherit their hair color from their pony parent more often than not.. so maybe?
>You shake your head.
>Nah. There's no way Cadance could have a secret daughter she never told anyone about, right?
>Then again, you vaguely remember a time when you were really little where Cadance disappeared for a few months.
>The age of the girl would line up right.
>But still, CADANCE being a deadbeat mom?!
>You almost couldn't believe it!
>Except... that could be what the map brought you here to see this time?
>A Princess's illegitimate daughter certainly sounds important enough.
>Does Shining know? Does Princess Celestia know?
>Should you try to talk to them?
>Decisions, decisions...

Continue?

>page 10

>>25494642
Are you serious? Did we really go from page 1 to page 10 in 29 minutes?

>>25494621
Of course continue.

>>25492880
So it's a little unclear to me who's a stupid asshole or not. Are they satyrs who get mentioned a lot in the thread? If so, then why isn't Pogo or Garret or Alex on here? Are they satyrs that cause turmoil in the thread? If that's the case, then why is Mistake, Darcy, or Mumble there?

>>25492880

>no one dares to say anything bad about Radiance

>>25492880
can I get an explanation why the pictured satyrs are labeled "stupid assholes"?

>>25495059
To Radiance, from Selena
>"Dear cousin, forgive me when I say this, but it amazes me how your knightly codpience hasn't deteriorated from syphilis, with the frequent laying of the help you do."
>>25495085
Some trigger heated discussions and are generally looked down upon. Some others are alright

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How do your satyrs kiss? Softly? Passionately? Tongue? Bites?
How do their kisses generally taste?
Are they easily turned on by kissing?
In fact, what are their biggest turn ons?

>>25495297
>How do your satyrs kiss? Softly? Passionately? Tongue? Bites?
Depends on the type of satyr. Pony satyrs love probing your mouth with their big tongues, while changeling and bat satyrs are more into sensuously sinking their fangs into you.

>How do their kisses generally taste?
Like satyr spit.

>Are they easily turned on by kissing?
Depends on the satyr. The older ones may be into it depending on personal taste. The younger ones will more likely think it's gross and prefer you to just stick your dick in their vaginas without involving getting any of your bodily fluids in their mouth.

>In fact, what are their biggest turn ons?
Their human parent and/or satyr siblings.

>>25495085
Oh, I think it's satirically trying to point out some the most popular satyrs are also get the most hated

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>>25495491
>simmer
>timber
>popular

>>25495297
Oh boy. I'm assuming you mean intimately and not chaste on the cheek family-member sort of stuff.
>Ace
Overpowering. Her height gives her an advantage over most satyrs so she'll force her partner's head back as far as it can go. Will mount or position herself to keep the other from moving away from her. Can easily turn wet and messy or go for no-lip full-tongue contact.
A gentle, spicy heat that lingers softly on the lips and skin afterwards.
Yes, especially as it involves skin-to-skin contact.
Lightly bound/incapacitated partner(s), body worship, taunting, reluctant babymaking.

>Hotshot
Definitely sneaky and underhanded; has a friendly kiss and then the one where he's going to try and get his way. Enjoys tonguing the collarbone, especially the dip.
Slightly spearmint. Lots of tingles.
Being focused on manipulation with his kissing means he doesn't derive much pleasure from it. Gets off more on the response than the action itself, especially as it becomes more audible.
Giving spankings, lipstick, body worship, rough sex, excessive dirty talk, babymaking sex. Very occasionally indulges partners as a delinquent sub to be worn down.

>Ratchet & Rocket
Hesitantly at first. Very patient, though with increasing urgency as events unfold. Rocket will most likely escalate first, but Ratchet has a high intensity threshold. Once they really get going, there's little regard for decorum; things will get messy, possibly including spit-swapping between the boys.
A slightly citrus tang, just a touch of sweetness.
Can be reluctant, but eager with coaxing. May get a little grabby.
Three(/More)somes, DP, giving bodily worship, light sensory deprivation, being doted on or mothered.

Something like that?

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>>25495569
Maybe it's just me, but I'm getting feeling that femdom gets you rock hard.

>>25495491
>Hope, Mistake and Darcy.
>Getting a lot of hate
Really? I must've missed that time.

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>>25495593
Wow, rude
>>25495569
Yeah, like that! I for one found it massively boner inducing.

>>25495542
>Get some of the most discussion
>Have a lot of stories
>Popular by content

>>25495606
The hardcore pushing of incest, incest, and perfection respectively. Not recently, but it was really bad at times.

>>25495593
It's just you. Femdom is okay, but not something I seek out.
I don't assign fetishes to the characters, they just tend to grow somewhat organically out of how I write/imagine them. Kink list is by no means comprehensive or indicative of regular intercourse.

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>>25495631
>Drakefags
>Drakefags
>Drakefags

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>>25495659
>whine fags

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>>25495684
>Incestfags

>>25495631
>Hope
>The hardcore pushing of incest
I don't remember reading a lot of incest stories about her lately. At least not so much that she can be crowned queen of incest.
>Mistake
>Incest
No more than the usual amount of incest we get between a few other satyrs.
>Darcy
>perfection
Okay, someone seriously has to explain this one to me. When has Darcy EVER been described as the most perfect being? Hottest, yeah, but the most perfect in every way?

I call bullshit on this.

>>25495741
You can call bull shit on it, doesn't mean it didn't happen. None of it is recent, but neither is that pic.

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>>25495297
>Trebble
Reserved at first, until you can prove yourself to her; then she's fairly reserved, but warms up rather quickly
Lemon zest with honey
Yes, especially if there's tongue involved
She likes tail pulling and light teasing; loves giving and recieving rough blowjobs and lots of cum (as long as it doesn't get in her hair)

>>25495297
>Laika

Messy as fuck. She slobbers all over and it can get as far back as your ear. No biting unless she is rough playing.

They taste terrible, the saliva leaves a rancid smell unless she takes special tablets to neutralize the smell.

She is easily turned on. Any kind of positive affection gets her excited and slowly turns to arousal if played the right way.

Her biggest turn on is rubbing her belly. She gets hot and heavy after a good session and then there may be some frustrated biting if you stop.

>>25495297
>How do their kisses generally taste?
Guess how I know you've never kissed anyone passionately before.

>>25496098
What? They can't wear lip balm or eat certain foods more often than others?

>>25495569

>Her height gives her an advantage over most satyrs

I thought the Amazonian thing was Darcy's shtick.

I saw Satyrs as being 5'6 on average for females and 5'8 for males. Ace would be about an inch above average and fairly lean most of her meat is concentrated in her legs/thighs. But that's just me.

And while I agree about the Femdom thing, I saw her as being gentle-ish. Yeah she enjoys running her fingers through a guy's hair while their head is in her lap, but she also loves taking a riding crop to their ass to hear the cute sounds they make.

Though there is only one guy who she would sub for, and he's so far out of her league he's in another reality

N-not that I've thought about it.

>>25495651

It's just fun to play "what ifs," and see what sticks.

IE I think that Hotshot would be the one into taunting, some beratement, and just being a total shit.

>>25496784
>manlet satyrs
So cute

>>25494912
>>25494621

Okay.

>Be Anon
>Be buying textbooks with your daughter Venus.
>Be marveling at how damn EXPENSIVE they are.
>Seriously, these are college-textbook tier expensive.
>You sigh.
"Looks like it's take-out next week."
>Venus looks annoyed as well, but accepts it.
>It is at this moment you heard loud whispering.
>You turn to see ponies whispering and pointing.
>You turn to where there pointing and you see a small purple alicorn going through the non-fiction section not too far away.
>Is that Princess Twilight?!
>You blink. Wait, is she-?
>"Something wrong, Dad?" Venus asks.
>Um...
"I-I think Princess Twilight is here, and she's staring at us."
>Venus turns to the small alicorn, who has by now realized that you've noticed her and turns her head back to the books.
>"Uh, hello Your Majesty?" Venus asks, eyes wide and not sure how to respond.
>"No! No! It was impolite of me to stare. I'm sorry." the purple Princess apologizes.
>Satyrs weren't too common a sight outside of mixed race settlements, so it was understandable.
>"It's fine. Can I ask why?" Venus asks.
>"Sorry its just, you look a lot like someone I know." Princess Twilight says.
>Eh? Wait a minute, isn't her brother the Captain of the Royal Guard who got married to-
>OH!
>Oh...
>Shit. She noticed the resemblance.
"Venus, honey. Do you mind paying for these while I talk to Princess Twilight?"
>She looks confused, but nods as you hand her the books and some bills.
>Once you're sure she's out of earshot, you turn back to Princess Twilight. Who just stared at your daughter as she walked away.
"You know it's rude to stare at someone's daughter while you're right in front of them."
>She blushes in embarrassment.
>Cute.
>"Sorry."
>You sigh.
>Now how to deal with the elephant in the room.
"It's fine. Uh, do you want to talk about...?"
>You subtly gesture towards Venus as she pays for the books.
>The Princess nods. Ah.

>TEN MINUTES LATER

>>25496784
This keeps coming up every so often. I'll keep saying the same thing.
I stand by my arguments that, threadwise, Ace was created at least around the same time as the original Darcy, and most certainly before the not-American McGee's Alice version that was latched onto. Additionally I'd always intended Ace to be around a head to a head-and-a-half taller than the male satyr average (which was originally intended as just her brothers) and visibly solid. Do with her what you like, but my intentions have never changed and, I believe, begun to be apparent since the introduction of Hotshot.

Everything else is well and good. Pegasatyrs are simply kink machines and up for just about anything with a little prodding.

>>25496918

>Be Twilight again.
>Feel like a weirdo as this man (who's name you don't even know yet) invites you into his apartment.
>You look around.
>It's not that big, but it gives off a very homey feeling.
>The girl looks confused, yet suspicious.
>"I don't mean to be rude Your Highness, but why are you here?" she asks.
>The man sighs, "It's about your mother, Venus."
>She scowls, "Oh.. I'll be in my room"
>Ouch. Now you feel like a jerk for bringing up such a sore topic out of nowhere.
>The girl leaves.
>The man sits down on the couch.
>"So uh... I know I should have said this earlier but, my name is Anon Y. Mous."
>You nod.
>He sighs, "And you're here to talk about Cadance."
>Your eyes widened.
"Wait, so she IS her mother?!"
>He scoffs, "She may have given birth to Venus, but she's never done much to deserve the title."
>You cringe.
"I'm sorry."
>Anon shakes his head, "It's fine, you didn't know."
>That doesn't make it right.
"So... I guess the easiest question to ask would be why and how this happened?"
>"Cadance and I dated during our first year of high school."
>She never mentioned any boyfriends before Shining when you asked her as a filly...
>"That changed when the two of us were invited to a party by a senior friend of ours. There was alcohol there. Naturally, the two of us started drinking to fit in."
>Oh..
>"Now I don't exactly remember all of what happened. It's a bit of a blur. We woke up the next morning in bed with me naked and not a condom in sight. A week later, she told me she missed her period."
>He sighed and looked out the window, "We were both just kids. Neither of us had any idea how to raise a kid. We panicked. Cadance thought her parents would kill her if she told them, so she told Princess Celestia instead."
>He shrugs, "Not long after, she disappears. I don't see her for almost a year. A week before she came back to school, I found Venus on my doorstep and a letter."

>>25497142

>Anon laughs bitterly, "You wanna know what that letter said? It said that her future as a Princess was too important to get ruined by an unplanned teen pregnancy. It also had my first child support payment clipped to it."
>WHAT?!
>He takes the sign of surprise on your face as a sign to keep going, "So of course I try to talk to her about this, but she pretends that she doesn't even know who I am and calls me crazy!"
"I-I'm sorry but I've known Cadance for YEARS. Why would she do something like this?! And why would Princess Celestia condone this?!"
>Anon shrugs, "I have no idea."
>He goes silent.
>"When I tried to probe further into this, I got moved here to Phillydelphia. I'm not a Native."
>Natives are descendants of the original humans who mysteriously appeared in Equestria one day 500 years ago.
>Displaced are humans who mysteriously get transported from Earth to Equestria. There are laws and systems in place to help them adjust to their new life.
"S-So you raised her by yourself without any help from your family or anything?"
>"Well I did have help. The other tenants helped me a lot during the first few years."
>He leans back, "So now you know. But what I want to know is how you know about us? I don't imagine Celestia or Cadance were eager to tell anyone about this."
>You shake your head.
"It was actually an accident... sort of. I wasn't looking for you per-se, rather-"
>You go into a basic explanation of the map inside your new castle and how it sends you and your friends somewhere you're needed.
>Anon goes silent, "Well, it seems that your map wanted you to know about us for whatever reason."
>Whatever Reason?!
"How is this not important?! It means you need help with something!"
>He shrugs, "Well we're actually doing pretty good now, so I don't see the problem."
>You stop.
>Then maybe... you need to confront Cadance about this?
>And get her to take responsibility?
>That's the only thing that makes sense to you right now.

>>25496992

I just get a Brienne of Tarth vibe from that description. Like she's purposefully displayed to be big and mannish. I literally have the opposite outlook for her (slender, lean, and tomboyish pretty). Granted I'm probably just complaining for the same of being contrary..

I've been here since the beginning and I cant for the life of me remember when stuff happened. I remember Darcy being a flavor of the month waifu but I don't remember Ace really being made along side her. I have a pretty shitty memory.

>>25497342

>You start to get up.
"Mister Anon, thank you for telling me about this. And sorry again about intruding like this. I-I think I need to have a talk with my sister-in-law."
>"Wait."
>You turn back to him.
>He sighs, "Look, I'm not saying that you can't talk to Cadance about this. Someone needs to. But PLEASE make sure nobody else finds out about Venus? I want her to live a normal life, and that means not getting chased by newshounds all the time."
>That made sense.
>The media would be all over the illegitimate child of the Crystal Princess.
>Not to mention the scandal now that Cadance is pregnant... again, apparently.
>You nod.
"I'll make sure nopony else does."
>You head to the door, "Goodbye, Mister Anon... And for what it's worth, I'm sorry this happened to you."
>He snorts, "Don't be. As much as Cadance's actions hurt me, Venus is the best daughter a man could ask for."
>That brings a small smile to your face.
>You nod and leave their apartment.
>You sigh.
>Now, how to deal with the fact that your sister-in-law is a deadbeat mom...

And that's it. This is my first Satyr green. What do you think?

>>25497408
good so far

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>>25497397
Of course Ace's purposefully big; every single female satyr at the time was bordering on petite and I found it a little tiresome. There were hardly any stories about internalized awkwardness about physical difference and growth or body dysmorphism; the majority of bodily conflict was based on external (pony) criticism. Making Ace large guaranteed that no matter what situation she was dropped into (with ponies or satyrs), she would have to deal with her difference. So, yeah, it was intentional because it filled (and still fills) a niche that I feel is worth exploring.

June 3rd for Ace because it's rude to forget your daughteru's creation date. A quick check has MSOB's American McGee's Darcy as July 20th. So yeah, right around the same time as that initial satyr surge. The 'standard' Darcy model came around about four months after that.

>>25497579
>Hope and Darcy are both Cancers
hue

>>25497579

>June 3rd

Fuck, now I feel like I gotta change shit.

I have a story about 2/3rds written before I stopped and lost steam and I had Ace birthday as April 14th, which I pulled out of my ass. Now I feel like I have to change it to that for autism's sake

I get where you're coming from. Though I have to disagree personally on execution. Just going by the human parents being faceless standins, the Satyrs would get a lot of their traits from their pony parents. Darcy being tall and broad I can see, as she's Big Mac'a daughter Hell even Little Mac going from Bobby Hill to Bara Bait I can see, as he's from the same stock. Ace being tall and broad I just can't see myself. Her Pony parent is a professional flyer (and I'll also argue that we have no idea how muh magic is involved in flying vs their physical ability vs what the writers feel like doing at the time), and her grandmother was shown to be fairly slender (that could just be age though), so it seems odd to me that suddenly you have Ace being She-Hulk with wings. It goes against (what I believe to be) her pedigree.

Unless you just say "magic did it," or something.

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>>25497814
I've said this time and time again: I legitimately do not care how folks want to portray the kids. The only reason I'm taking a stand here is because I assume you're trying to understand where I'm coming from. Go ahead with whatever date you want; I'm only referring to the first time I posted something about her.

>Just going by the human parents being faceless standins, the Satyrs would get a lot of their traits from their pony parents
This is silly, and I've thought it silly for a long time. I know that parents may be relegated to the sidelines for a number of people at this point, but there are still a number of them that have developed qualities of a visible parent:
ISoM has a lethargic figure who embodies the sort of '9-5 provider' sort of father, albeit reluctantly.
Anything with Cider's dad is presumed to be a stout, farm-boy type.
Lich-dad is a popular Princess husband.
There are even headcanons which push Darcy's Mami as being strictly latina, in spite of the existence of Little Mac suggesting something entirely different.
To presume that these characters are faceless at this point is, again, silly. One could certainly self-insert on them with relative ease, but they do have basic outlines for who they are and what they do. So it has been with my development of 'Poppa'.
He still doesn't have a name because I want to be able to maintain that sense of immersion and I've been doing it so long that it's second nature at this point. But that doesn't change that he's adventurous, devoted, combat-capable, and has a short temper regarding perceived slights to his kids, among many other qualities. Those inclinations bring with them certain physical qualities that make Ace being of solid size reasonable in my mind.

I could go on, but going to two posts on headcanon that we're simply not going to agree on is silly. So I'll just redirect your attention back to the first line and reiterate: do what you like. Just don't say I'm pulling this out of thin air.

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>>25497814
I don't know, Simmer and Broil get hips like tree trunks and we've seen that Fizzle is built normally like a dragon. How come none of the other drakes-Mnn, well I guess just Muddle and Blare-how come they don't look like that? Heck, same goes for Darcy, Ivy/Timber, Tonbo, all the other dark skin satyrs, etc. Clearly we're not always going for faceless Anon stand-in eithout their own traits and characteristics to pass on.

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>Do satyrs have favorite lullabies?

>>25497408
I like it.

So what is your headcanon when it comes to the amount of satyrs there are in Equestria?
Do you like to imagine that every single satyr that has been created exists in the same world? Or does only a select few exist in your world?

>>25500528
You could count the number of satyrs in my headPonyville on one hand.

Have we had any Arimaspi satyrs yet?

>>25500737
Arimaspi is dead, yo

>>25500748
Well, Arimaspi is dead, but presumably he wasn't the only one of his species. There must be other (preferably female) giant horned goat-cyclopses out there in Equestria just waiting for an Anon to come a long and engage in reproductive activities with them.

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>>25497408
Are you gonna write more in the future?

>>25498287

>The only reason I'm taking a stand here is because I assume you're trying to understand where I'm coming from.

That's literally it. I was just trying to understand your viewpoint, that's all. I can say agree to disagree and be done with it, I only wanted more on how you came to your conclusions.

>Go ahead with whatever date you want; I'm only referring to the first time I posted something about her.

The first time someone posts something about a character, in my mind, is more or less their birthday, at least for a character as old as Ace. Newer ones I'd just pull something out of my ass.

>There are even headcanons which push Darcy's Mami as being strictly latina, in spite of the existence of Little Mac suggesting something entirely different.

Has there even been stuff about Latino Little Mac?

>To presume that these characters are faceless at this point is, again, silly. One could certainly self-insert on them with relative ease, but they do have basic outlines for who they are and what they do.

I'll give you that, though I'd argue its relative in my case. This could be part of my thing but when it comes to the humans I've always wanted a little bit more than just a general outline. I always ask myself "Who are they? Where do they come from? How did they get here? What did they do back on Earth and what do they do in Equestria," among other things. I just like being thorough. Hell I have even given some names just because always calling them stuff like "honey," always bugs me a little when the parents are talking or, God forbid, two humans are talking to each other.

>>25498293

>Heck, same goes for Darcy, Ivy/Timber, Tonbo, all the other dark skin satyrs

>Ivy/Timber
>dark skin satyrs

Did I miss something or am I not reading that right?

>>25501496
>Did I miss something or am I not reading that right?
If I remember correctly, a few, really few, people used to whine about Ivy and Timber being too pale.
Just ignore it, that's what I did.

>>25501664
What? No, I meant all the other dark skin satyrs besides the ones named on there. Like Darcy, Simmer and Broil, Thistle and Muddle.

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>>25501496
>I only wanted more on how you came to your conclusions.
>The first time someone posts something about a character, in my mind, is more or less their birthday
Fair enough.
>Has there even been stuff about Latino Little Mac?
Mac has generally been characterized as straight whitebread; like German/Irish straight out of the Midwest, the type who freckles when someone even mentions the sun, white. I'm not raising issues with that, just using it to point out that we're not bound by the idea that a child must resemble their parent.
Side note: have you looked at some the flutterfamily group shots? It's an extreme example, and not every artist would draw them the same (naturally), but only taking pony-parent traits can result in something like pic related. I personally find that very, very boring.
>I've always wanted a little bit more than just a general outline
Then that's an issue to raise with writers who don't develop their human characters. The entire premise around building mine was based on non-romantic things I'd aspire to do in Equestria (or any fantasy world for that matter): lots of exploring, the occasional spat of high adventure, and some light acts of heroism to pad the resume. And, after building a character would would probably look like after going through all of that, it was a question of what happens when that individual suddenly retires from the business to raise a child full-time. Then two. And support a constantly stressed spouse. So there he is, still full of life and a lust for what's beyond the horizon, brimming with as of yet unsated desires, harboring aspirations of going back out into the wild world someday, possibly accompanied by one or more of his kids.
By this point I'll wager that our humans have more or less completely diverged. But in the end, that's all there ever is to it.

>>25501794
I don't know about other guys but I love me some mocha satyrs
Dat delicious brown

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>>25502009
You and me both

>>25500528
More than 10, less than 30.

>>25500528
Everyone. Every last stinking one of them

>>25503498
That's cute, but why is she standing on the stool?

>>25499650
>>25501488
>>25497428

Thanks and maybe. Should I add more Satyr characters? Because I haven't gotten a grasp on any of their personalities yet.

>>25503881
I think you should just add the ones you really like. After all, everything is a variable.

>>25503901

That works. The problem is I have no real idea how the story is supposed to end.

>>25504228
How about splitting it up into three or more parts for now, and thinking about how it should end later?

>>25504565

Good idea, but the problem is that I like knowing how I should end a story before I start writing. Otherwise I'll just meander on an on.

I just have to ask.. How many here are posting in the /utg/?

>>25505565
What's /utg/?

>>25501908

>we're not bound by the idea that a child must resemble their parent
>but only taking pony-parent traits can result in something like pic related. I personally find that very, very boring.

Exact copies are kinda lazy, in my opinion. That said I don't like them straying too far from their pony parent in terms of color scheme. A point I raised a long time ago was about the Satyrs and their hair/leg/eye color compared to their pony parents. Closs enough where you can say "Oh yeah, that's X's kid," but not a 1:1 similarity. I know that pony genes have been shown to be completely fucking weird (see the Cakes, and even Twilight's family to a lesser extent), but that's dealing with two ponies instead of a pony and a human.

If a pony has a red coat, the Satyr should have a shade of red or there about for their leg color. Hair I'm a little more liberal about (especially hair styles), and even having a stripe like Darcy's could be seen as a rare quirk in Satyrs, as having too many like that would make it lose it's uniqueness (and seems kinda doughnut steel to me). Eyes are a split. Sometimes they're close to the human parent's, sometimes an off coloring of the Pony's.

>That last paragraph

I'm kinda opposite. Just have a quiet life somewhere in Equestria with a cute pony wife, halfling children, and maybe even some grandchildren. But that's just me.

What's Satyr's biggest fear?

>>25507031
Laika's biggest fear is that she will become a full blown furry like her dads, and then Garret wont think she's beautiful anymore. Which actually does happen in one possiblity but he loves her no matter what. You know the one, where she becomes a DJ

Muddle's biggest fear is that he will be a kid forever. Its my head canon that dragons grow really quick to a certain age but then hit a growth stunt in that they take ages to grow from kid to teen, and teen to adult. And he is afraid that he always acts like a petulant child because that is how his mind is gonna stay. But thankfully his human side counters it and he is really just immature and spoiled.

>>25507175
No, Muddle's biggest fear is that the world goes gay. His friends go trappish or bears, his friends who are girls become carpet munchers or dykes. Even his own family. Heaven forbid his brother becomes a fag. It's bad enough that he KNOWS some gays, now they're able to marry.

>>25507175
Why does Laika have multiple dads?

>>25508174
A bunch of diamond dogs gangbanged her mom and nobody knows for sure exactly who her biological father is, so they're all like fathers to her.

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>>25508233

>>25507031
>Thistle is really worried about Orion's well-being, and that one day he'll do something scary. She's also afraid of change and her friends leaving her home in Ponyville, especially when her dad goes on diplomatic missions with Twilight. She just misses him a lot, qnd her mom tries her best to cheer her up.
>>25507175
I like this.

Does /satyr/ have a double standard of any kind?

>>25508738
Collectively, you can make arguments either way. The one with the most substantial evidence is favoring the girls over the boys.
Individually? Yes. Absolutely. Too many to list.

>>25508738
Something about shipping probably.

>>25508762
I'd like to hear some of them

>>25508762
Of the sexes, yeah.

>>25508667

>Thistle is really worried about Orion's well-being, and that one day he'll do something scary.

So is Rory the most likely to go nuclear?

>>25509526
Nuclear = suicidal?

>>25508986
Some of the collective or individuals?

>>25510184

Nuclear as in Elliot Rodger.

>>25510232
I prepare Nuclear by Mike Oldfield.

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Which satyrs do you think are the most likely to have PTSD?

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>>25511395

>>25507031
Alex is afraid of not being able to please her mate because of her itty bitty kitty vagina

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>>25512442
Nothing says she can't use her ass. Do we have any other characterizations of Alex besides hot musclegirl tsundere? Any hopes and aspirations? Likes, dislikes, what? I figure that she'd really want to get individuals into shape because she knows how beneficial it is to be healthy due to gaining a lot of weight years back with a stint of depression.

>>25512500
She was possibly bi-curious. Though I'm sure thats just the shipping here running amok. For a while, Alex x Eventide was a thing.

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>>25512546
I never got that ship, but I'm glad Eventide got characterized a lot. Her family issues are interesting and it's a nice use of Discordian magic. But I could see her being bi-curious, so that's hot. Maybe she'd want to experiment on Emma, or Mumble, or Prism.

>>25512566
>Alex walks in on Pogo in a dress
>She is wondering what the hell is going on
>Pogo says he worked out a deal
>She can experiment with Mumble if Timber can experiment with him
>It took three weeks, a lawyer, and a LOT of bouncy boy butt trying to appeal to a straight guy
>But he did it
>For her
><3
>Now he's gonna go bounce on some Flutter dick as Alex takes a plastic/metal strap on

>>25512566
>>25512880
Why? Why is it that everytime we talk about satyrs being curious and wanting to experiment with someone, that someone almost always ends up being Mumble or Timber?

>>25513066
They seem the most likely to swing? I unno.

>>25513066
I dunno, I only ever pay attention to this place if theres daughteru incest.

What are some other satyr specific diseases that you think they have? I typically think thay they'd be prone to weird, unique, and a tad lewd magical diseases because of they're hybrid nature. Some examples would be:
>Restless Wing Syndrome: Afflicts all winged abominations, restless wing syndrome causes spasms in the wing muscles and causes jittery fluttering and stiff, uncomfortable positions in wings. Causes wing sensitivity to go up and may be reduced with massaging and/or preening.
>Magical Discharge: Afflicts all magic using abominations, magical discharge causes failiure in spellcasting and redirects the sensation of spellcasting (tingling, warming, fuzziness) on different parts of the body. Symptons will dissappear after afflicted ceases their spellcasting for an extended period of time (side effects may occur).
>Overheating: Afflicts all dragon abominations, overheating causes the victim's body temperature to flare up and inflicts a massive fever. Causes disorientated thinking and may be relieved wirh copious amounts of fluid.

>>25513096
>>25513066
I always thought Kaos would be the first choice for experimenting with stuff

>>25513226
>All this talk and no one thinks to use the clone pool

>>25513243
>Self-cest
>Satyr makes a clone of themselves and is really awkward at first to initiate sex
>But they get turned on so quickly since the clone can hit all their kinks and likes
>Decide to have a very satisfying time and hadn't realized how hot their fucked silly face has before
M-muh

>>25513243

I havent watched since S2 how does it work

>>25513313
Looo into the pool, chant some magic mumbo jumbo, go in, and bam.

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I very much want to see more Garnet like this.

>>25513480
What was that one story with Garret and Anon eating steak and drinking wine? Leads to Anon fucking Garret. Been looking for it.

>>25513480
>>25513621
Plebian who doesn't read the thread here, is it garnet or garret? I've seen both used almost interchangeably.

>>25513759
Garret is his nickname, like Rory is Orion's. Official name is a gem, like his sister's. Depends on if you are trying to be familiar or not.

>>25513102
More or less this.

>>25513823
Thanks for the polite and prompt reply.

>>25513904
You are quite welcome. If you have any other questions, feel free to ask.

>>25512500
Hey, griffin girls love anal. It's a fact.

She's often shown to be hiding an intellectual side, which may or may not come from the sphinx thing.
Sometimes it's hidden from the parents, because Gilda and Anon are written as disapproving of intelligence over physical.
Other times, she only hides it because muh rep.
I might be remembering this wrong, but in the story where Hope and Alex were sisters, didn't Alex actually like hanging out with her laid back horse mom a bit more than her brash and proud biological mother?

>>25514211
She was more open to Lyra because she always treated her more warmly than her mother did. Gilda wasn't a bad mom but she just wasn't really ready or wanting to have a child. But I don't remeber Alex really seeking Lyra out to hang with. I need to reread it

http://imgur.com/FbxUdGz

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>>25495059
Well he is basically perfect. Poised, patient, stoic, intelligent, attractive, diligent, kind, humble and not to mention a demi-god with near hax tier magic ability. Personally, I see his only real downsides being a certain amount of humourlessness and a wall of formality that you have to break through in order to get to know him before he'll open up to you.

That and the myriad of bastards he's fathered and that his mother keeps out of the public eye. Though he embodies many of the seven virtues, chastity isn't one of them.

>>25515201
Home Run a lewd.
I love that look on her face.

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>>25495373
>sinking their fangs into you.
Good thing rabies is curable in Horseland.

>>25515201
unf

>>25515313
So are we currently viewing that cutie as Butt Bat's baby, or the incest child between Yuzu and her dad?

>>25515296
He sucks at fighting. Really sucks. A lot. The guards keeps joking about how bad he is, that's why you almost never see him at the training grounds.

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>>25515351
I don't like assbat, so I prefer the incest origin. I know that's not everybody's cup of tea though and would have no problem accepting her as otherwise for the sake of green.

>>25515351
Arrhythmia's. It wouldn't make any sense otherwise, it's not like we could make Thorn Timber and Ivy's love child too, can we?

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>>25515379
I sort of picture him as being competent and noticeably better than average in melee, though no master. Basically he could hold his own in a physical fight against one or maybe even two opponents in a pinch, but would much prefer to remain at a distance and simply incinerate them with a well honed fireball. His father is always trying to get him to practice sparring with him.

>>25515296

I always saw Sirius as the fun hating, stick up his ass one.

Where as Radiance is a playboy who usually gets others to do his duties for him unless his parents directly intervene. He's genuinely afraid of failure and living up to his perfect mother, to the point where he sometimes just freezes when confronted with responsibility.

He hates formality tithe point of telling people not to call him Prince, and tries to be on a first name basis with everyone. He's also developed a silver tongue and good negotiating skills from dodging his duties.

>>25515434

I pegged him as above average in terms of physical strength, but where he really shines is his speed and his agility. He's also fairly adept at magic.

He also has a custom revolver his father gave him for those "fuck it," moments

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>>25515296

>>25515472
>revolver
>Not an obrez
Well what's he going to do if he needs to shoot a minotaur that's standing behind another minotaur on the opposite side of a concrete wall while at the same time singing the eyebrows off of anybody standing within ten feet in font of him?

>>25515534
>singing
singeing

Fuck you, auto-correct.

>>25515534

Because gun technology has only gotten so far.

Think like the Wild West in terms of how advanced it is.

Though they also combine it with magic, so there's that.

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>>25515492
But what about the important things? The important lewd things?

>>25515620
It's missing categories for both penis size (ranging from "1-inch wonder ween" to "third leg" tier) and vagina tightness (ranging from "cavern of the echoing depths" to "coal goes in, diamonds come out" tier)

>>25515837
That'd be hot.

>>25515296
Basically he's Griffith

>>25516080
That name rings a bell but I'm not sure I know who that is.

>>25515434
>>25515472
>>25515534
>>25515567
Is it just me, or does every discussion about how satyrs would do in a fight always end in the same way?
If the satyr is part unicorn, then it's "They'll blast away all enemies with fireballs and shit just like that." And if the satyr doesn't know magic, then the answer is "they'll shoot foes with guns they got from their parents."

>>25516139
First Order Optimal Strategy

>>25516139

>satyr quickdraw McGraw's threatanon
>"Heh, I always wonder why people don't start with their strongest attack "

Anyway in honor of your bitching, everyone post your favorite fight scene in a paste

>>25516144

Pretty much this.

Magic gives Unicorns a pretty massive advantage. Though not everyone can shoot a fireball, or even a magic blast that does any major damage, they can still get a rock (or some other projectile) and throw it really really hard.

Firearms take that advantage away. It gives non magic users the ability to return fire upon a magic user and potentially be out of range of the enemy's magic. Though this problem could also be solved with magic (shield spell or something), it still gives a leg up to the muggles of the world in the perverbal arms race.

Though humans are not really widespread (I always thought there would be around 200 of them) and a few ponies think they're nothing more than a curiosity. So there isn't a massive market for them other than perhaps military or those with a lot of money, and even then you have to make them suited for ponies to use.

Plus I'm pretty sure most people here are American and Americans love guns as much as hamburgers.

>>25516139
Because people unshackle magic to a ridiculous degree. Not just this thread, but the entire fandom. A little creativity could go a long way

>>25516342
>people unshackle magic to a ridiculous degree
>>25516303
>Magic gives Unicorns a pretty massive advantage


Keep in mind that nearly every unicorn depicted in the show can barely levitate small objects and manually perform most tasks, not everyone is capable of princess level BS

>>25516139
>And if the satyr doesn't know magic, then the answer is "they'll shoot foes with guns they got from their parents."

>Pogo dawns his trusty rustic stetson that he got from Auntie Applejack and drapes a cloak over himself.
>Twirling two pistols he goes to holster them but drops them as they discharge on the floor as Pogo screeches before sniffling and crying as he drops to the floor as the camera shuts off.
>Alex lowers her recording device and gives a grimace "Yeah, lets not show this to anybody yet, lets get you cleaned up."

>>25516139
>Leaf has knows poison herbal concoctions (lethal and non-lethal) and keeps a blowdart and dagger laced with them if she gets in a fight.
>Asha can summon spirits of the dead to distract and terrorize her attackers and or conjure small nature constructs to fight alongside her
>Cici would carry a pair of knuckles dusters in her bag if she needs to walk through the bad part of Manehatten; crotch shots, eye pokes, and neck shots take full priority

>>25516139
Unless they're drakes. Dragons are apparently invincible.

>>25516435
>>25516434

>Hope walks around unarmed because her father taught her only a psychopath would carry around deadly weapons in their daily commute
>Shes the only one who wasn't arrested for murder or manslaughter by 21

>>25516473

Eurokek detected.

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>>25516473
>>25516473
>Having a weapon makes you a psycho.
Maybe if you're one of those morons who walk around with a rifle on their back in public, just because they can.
But, I'll humor you.

So, what about the other kids by that Anon?
I assume that, Hope and Gumdrop just rely on some close quarters training from Bon Bon.
Home Run has a bat and a hell of a swing.
Alex can just take off her gloves and use claws. She will never admit she finds her fathers insistence on calling them "kitten mittens" endearing.

>>25516576
>She will never admit she finds her fathers insistence on calling them "kitten mittens" endearing.

I require a story about him embarrassing her in public with this.

>>25516421
Wasn't that what I implied? I don't really mind magical light beams flying everywhere, but when you start exerting force on an object, it's an entirely different game.
But it's far easier to just say magic is perpetual motion machine tier. which is wrong, dumb, silly, and OP, but whatever

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>>25516446
They aren't invincible to my dick

>>25516421

My thought with magic was akin to the Las Rifles from 40k.

By themselves they don't really do diddly. But with others they do a whole lot of diddily.

>>25516672

man I don't know which one of these chicks I'd do first

>>25516778
That's pretty much canon as a bunch of unicorns teamed together in the past to raise the sun and moon before Celestia and Luna did

>>25513102
This nigga gets it

>>25516820
when did Faust say that again

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>>25516818
>these chicks
>these

>>25516951

It was in Hearth's Warming in Season 2

>>25516818
The smart choice is Broil [The left], the more fetishy choice would be Simmer. [the male]

So Cinder got some art of her.

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>>25518643
Crud, I forgot the pic. But yeah, I thoyght about making her a blacksmith for the guard or something

>>25518691
That is a really nice pic, but can you remind me who Cinder is now again? Name isn't in the Name list.

>>25518723
Fairly new OCish drake. Like how Yuzu is an OCish bat satyr.

>>25518691
A sword forged in dragon fire?
Nothing holds an edge like Valyrian steel.

>>25518691
Is that Broil as a blacksmith?

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>>25519045
It's Cinder.

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>>25518864
I always thought she was the daughter of that really huge red dragon in Dragonshy

>>25519503
Really? I'm 80% sure someone made her parent "unidentified oc doughnut steel". For the same reason Yuzu's is uods; more artistic freedom in design other than "like their non-human parent".

>>25519503

>Dragon bigger than a house
>Impregnates a female human

>>25519584
UNF
U N F
>UNF
UNF

>>25519584
But this show has magic that can change people's size?

Who's the one satyr that [insert satyr here] secretly thinks about and why?

>>25519833

>If Satyr is a guy

Dawn and/or Selena

>If Satyr is a girl

Radiance/Sirius

>Why?

>Royalty
>Rich
>demigods
>Hot
>Probably seen by the general public as "perfect"

>>25519899
I think >>25519833
Meant which satyr do THEY think about, not in general. So x thinks about y in secret

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>>25518691
I don't know why, but showing her belly button is insanely cute and makes me want to kiss her stomach. Also those hips. Those hips, man.

>>25519833
Annie often thinks of Misty because she considers herself asexual but yet can't get her out of her head. She wonders if what she likes is genuine attraction or some kind of obsession.

Garret often thinks of Broil and Simmer and often laments if the gems they eat come out as regular shit or gem encrusted shit. And then he snickers to himself at the thought of gem encrusted shit. This then leads to very disturbing thoughts of Laika picking gems out of shit and he wonders if Laika actually does that. which is why he always makes her wash her hands when she comes over. He can never bring himself to ask Laika or the drakes about any of this.

Darcy sometimes thinks about Warren, sexually. She's seen him around at different rodeos and likes that he's a big guy, for her. But his splotchy skin grosses her out.

Sterling thinks about Pogo and wonders if he and his mom were ever romantically involved from some odd things he found around the house. Including a vomit inducing pink horse dildo

>>25520066

>That second paragraph

Jesus Christ I want off this ride.

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>>25520066
>Potentially a good guy for Darcy
>Nice and big guy, knows his way around a rodeo clown act
>Potentially Warren's chance to have an actual girlfriend
>But his vitiligo creeps her out, leaving him forever alone
O-oh...

>>25520161
... Man, fuck her. I still love you, you tall bastard.

>>25520161

So find someone for him who wouldn't be creeped out by his skin disease.

I'd imagine Ivy could see past it. But then I feel like that sentence could start a shipping war.

>>25520389
>someone for him who wouldn't be creeped out by his skin disease.
Considering horses, like many mammals, can hove mottled skin, I doubt it'd be that weird.

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>>25519833
Deloras likes to think about Pogo a lot after her dad (Cranky) brought her to Pinkie's house for a visit. She only got a glimpse of him and she was shy when she introduced herself, but she just wonders how he's been doing since then.
>>25520389
Relationships aren't set in stone, you could make your own if you wish

>>25520440

>Relationships aren't set in stone, you could make your own if you wish

Then I shall ship Sapphire with a ham and cheese sandwich.

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>>25520389
Peach would be a good choice

>>25520583

The only reason I like Ivy for that is because I like to think Ivy is fairly petite, and Warren being huge and strong, would be worried that one wrong move could break her like a twig, so he'd be extra careful around her. Plus size difference can be hella cute

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I can see that, yeah. I honestly like a more buxom Ivy, but I can roll with this as well. We don't have any size difference couples other than the ones involved with either Steam Boat or Herc and gay isn't my cup of tea, so those are lost causes

>>25520491
Sounds like a ham bell.

>>25520583
Oooh, even better.
>Older cousin is too shallow
>Decide to be friends with the poor heart broken big galoot
>Eventually want to be more than friends
>Tall guy and short girl combo

>>25520161
I like this idea. Darcy doesn't date anyone, not because she wants to be admired for more than her looks, but because she is shallow as fuck. By the time she gets over it, her own looks have faded and many of those she rejected are now in happy relationships. Like >>25520583
>>25520765
A reminder within 20 yards that karma exists.

>>25520763

I kinda have this idea in my head about how the three main Satyr types develop physically. Unicorns are petite and elf like in their build. Pegasi are lean or lanky, and Earth Satyrs are stocky and solidly built.

Though that's not the case all the time. Abacus is fairly scrawny. Sapphire is voluptuous and full bodied, and Ivy as I said is fairly dainty.

Also I kinda agree with Carnifex's thoughts on Fluttershy. She was once a model, and they're usually pretty skinny. Plus she had a unique puppet as a filly, being long limbed and gangily. Though I do realize that's not taking into account the human parent's genes

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What's the one band/genre your satyr listens to in their spare time?

>>25521339
>Mudpie
Elton John.

>Trimmings
Pegboard Nerds

>Herc
Limp Bizkit

>Fauna
Cut Chemist

>Pogo
Megadeth

>Sterling
Weird Al

>Reuben
NPR

>Glimmer
Octavia

>>25520583
Who is peach? Is that ABs kid?

>>25520929
I don't like the idea of Darcy being shallow, it's too..typical of a beautiful girl. i like to think that his skin condition honestly grosses her out. She doesn't want to sound or be mean, but it's just..gross. It would be funny though to read about how everyone hates on her for being "shallow" and her being hurt for it