They say that the first sentence is the most important. It draws

bugs.. easy on the carrots

>>9898813
/thread

>>9898809
Gerald began – but was interrupted by a piercing whistle which cost him ten percent of his hearing permanently, as it did everyone else in a ten-mile radius of the eruption, not that it mattered much because for them “permanently” meant the next ten minutes or so until buried by searing lava or suffocated by choking ash – to pee.

CRASH!

>>9898823
… into his own mouth.

>>9898809
"Call me stately," plump Buck Mulligan screamed across the sky

Most people think that being a detective is danger, adventure, and desperate, lonely housewives.

>>9898809
"/lit/ is for the discussion of literature, specifically books (fiction & non-fiction), short stories, poetry, creative writing, etc" she whispered softly into my ear, her hand still resting on my thigh.

>>9898809
men are not bad, women do not love

One morning [protagonist] woke up, and drew, from his dream, a strange thought.

>>9898809
"HOLY FUCKING SHIT, GET THE FUCK OFF MY BOARD YOU GOD DAMN NORMAL FAG!" The autistic young lad bellowed at his fragile computer screen, plumes of dark smoke emanated from his temple as he slobbered all over his 700$ keyboard.

My editor told me it'd be a foolish idea for my first sentence to condemn the use of Chalula's hot sauce, but some risks are worth taking.

"I don't understand how eggs got stuck with breakfast; you can put bacon on a sandwich without anyone freaking out -- but the moment your sandwich has an egg, book, it's a breakfast sandwich."

>>9898937
Well fuck, I'm interested. Tell me more.

>>9898937
Holy...... I want more

>>9898809
Dirty art gallery pamphlets and crumbled plastic cups dragged in the wind along dead leaves on the street where James waited for the morning bus, coffee in hand, earphones singing Debussy and not another soul in sight.

>>9898809
Fascism is inherently silly.

>>9898809

I fuck the music. I make it cum.

I blew Juan Marcos Dominguez-Santoval II's dad last year after breaking up with him, and since he had been insisting, wrongly, that I had some kind of nerve.

Only one enemy remained; two, if we allowed for the possibility of God or a Godlike figure which got me into this mess, which you're probably wondering how I got into in the first place.

f on a winter's night a traveler, outside the town of Malbork, leaning from the steep slope without fear of wind or vertigo, looks down in the gathering shadow in a network of lines that enlace, in a network of lines that intersect, on the carpet of leaves illuminated by the moon around an empty grave—What story down there awaits its end?

>>9899511
>Only one enemy remained; two, if we allowed for the possibility of God

I remember seeing this on /r/writingprompts a few months back.

>>9898957
>>9899270
Samefag. Sad!

>>9898809
I feel like this is a myth, rather, the first sentence is what people who don't know how to write focus on because it's what they spend four hours staring at a page trying to type.

Does anyone remember the first sentence of Huckleberry Finn? Nobody fucking does. Does it matter? It's only when it has a weird word, but I didn't read Moby Dick because some tool with a biblical sounding name told me what to call him, I read it because I wanted to read about sea-demons getting hit in the eyes with harpoons by boatniggers with funny accents.

Thems was good times.

>>9898809
It was a dark and stormy night when I told him I'm not into homosex, like, at all.

>>9898809
I touched his bulge while he was driving in the night.

The wind was blowing but my camarade kept following.

>>9898809
It was the beginning of the end.

>>9898809
>"My granda told it right -- not a bloke out there who doesnae want to get 'tween a dwarf wench's trotters!"

Johnny Retahd loved sucking a good feminine cock after a hard day of murder and shoe-shine.

>>9898809
The Salty Salamander was the only place left where no one judged you for flakey crust crumbling off your pants or for the leaky semen stuck to your hair.

The shadows of first four then fifty fireman passed over the sleeping beggar who gradually appeared out of the dark in the flare of the growing light.

>>9899618

Yeah, worrying about the first line is MFA as fuck. Don't do it.

"Wow, this first line is so mundane! I'm not reading another word!"

>>9898809
Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came screaming across the sky, surrounded by heads and bodies.

Sometimes faces paint a picture, her’s had painted petulance.

P-p-p-p-p-p-p-p

>>9898854
kek, would read

>Listen kid, I think you'd be more comfortable at that place- the reality of it all sank in as Robert looked at where the staunch and scarred mount of a man was pointing. The building across the street was colorful and had an air of unrestrained flagrancy. The enormous sign read "Weenie Hut Jr's" and stood alone against the giant flowers of the ocean.

>>9898809

"she stepped aside and the pound dropped, fist exploded, oblivion faltered, fared an altered silk string negligee spilling milk screamed on scene on vertical screen in the baked bread he tapped around" was Jesse hallucinating in a fever-flu notion a rhythm of words within the state of half-sleep half-sick under 6 or 8 thin bed-sheets of varying colors.

>>9901026

>Robert
>Weenie Hut Jr's

hey whats up?

>>9901215
not much how about u?

>>9898854
Where's the stately and screamed across the sky from?
t. pleb

>>9901443
Gravity's Rainbow

>>9901443
Ulysse's Vice.

>>9899592

I wrote the original comment, FWIW neither of these were me.

The Bay is a lung.

He wasn't sure, but he could swear the night was glaring at him.

>>9901091
this is very very bad.

>>9901026
>a realist spongebob
p. good

She was the kind of chick with a gallon size jug of lube, with squeeze dispenser, on her nightstand.

>>9898809
Pounding on her lower back, I withdrew my penis from her anus then as it prolapsed, sucked it like a dick

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>>9899511
Brilliant!

Robert was a simple man, he liked big ol' titties and could not lie, unfortunately, his parole officer did not know about his condition.

Once upon a time, dear reader, you read a book about a man, and that man was me: this is my book, dear reader, the one you now hold in your hands.

None of the witnesses, each of their teary eyes violated with a violence that raped their psyches beyond repair, could understand how the neck muscles tore before the hair roots, as Leutenent Sargent used a fistful of greasy ponytail to pull terrorist head from terrorist body, and then turned, with a look wilder than the eternally frozen fear of his victims, to face the crowd of shellschocked civilians and growl out, "not again," and then boot the bloody thing to fly rolling over the nearby steeple.

This is not the first time I've posted this, but would love some advice still after the edits.

The asylum did not loom, as he had been told, but instead drooped at all sides. Every stone, brick, and hall sagged like a summer squash left out far past its season. The doctor unpacked his bag of shaving kit and linen jumper. From a small window the he could see the peak of the slope where a weather vane span, pointing an accusatory iron finger towards him. That morning the nurse had left green oranges and fresh milk on the table that sat before the tiny dusted window. In the quiet moments preceding dawn, after the moans of the committed's night terrors, but before their morning exercise, he ate eaten the sour fruit. A finger rooted in his cheek, picking at a seed lodged into a molar. Accompanying the fruit had been a short letter, written to him by the nurse, explaining she had picked the fruit herself. It was during vigorous exercise when he entertained two notions, first the possibility if the nurse was sweet on him, and the second beings some kind of indirect spite pointed towards him over his sudden arrival and displacement of the chief physician. Sweat dripped from his scalp, and pooled in the small of his back to soak the over sized nightdress he wore. Afterward a cool towel pressed against his eyes soothed the dull headache the calisthenics brought on, and as he prepared to bathe a pounding knock disturbed his routine.

>>9903060
>I withdrew my penis from her anus then as it prolapsed, sucked it like a dick


Her anus sucked like a dick?

>>9903116
It's pretty good man! The only bits that niggled me were "summer squash" because I know you're trying to convey its transformation into a rotten mouldy old fruit (which I like contrasted with the fresh fruit from the nurse), but something about the phrase "summer squash" gives me a ride and fresh feeling that outweighs the "past it's season" so I think that second half of the sentence needs more. Maybe "to rot past its season" or something.

I also thought the last sentence could be broken into two, to speed up the reading at the end and make the knock feel more abrupt and interrupting, rather than flowing on from the rest of the content.

>>9903201
Perhaps change it from summer squash to just squash?

I see what you mean for the last sentence.

>>9903208
Yeah that could work, or even some other ambiguously negative adjective beforehand instead of summer, like swollen.

"Many years later, as he faced the firing squad, Colonel Aureliano Buendía was to remember that distant afternoon when his father took him to discover ice."

>>9903331
dang, got any more of this?

i like the character's name a lot...

What I learned in boating school is _____ _____ _____.

>>9898809
"Are you sure this is what's best for you?"

"Three days ago I stripped nude and laid down on my kitchen floor, determined to stay there until I died."

Macaroni shoes for a complete fucking faggot named Barry Andre.

"You a good catch Wade, your a good guy...stay a good kid. You know you're not cut out for this. "

Call me Ischlemiel.

>>9904275
Haha, would read

>>9898809

Has anyone seen my keys?

Before I relate this spiritual episode of my life, it is urgent and of utmost importance to make one thing clear: there is a science as old and ancient as the existence of man on Earth; emphatically, I'm referring to the "Jina Science".

>>9898809
John woke up and got dressed.

>>9898809
But I sure know how to write a winning last sentence.
>and then he woke up

He Glanced at the ticking ounce of gold on his wrist and Moved nervously back and on his chair that it alarmed his counsellor

>>9898809
>They say that the first sentence is the most important
Actually most books have shitty first sentences. I think it's the first paragraph actually that makes or breaks a memorable "intro".

When Mike's heart attack struck he was forced to choose between dialing 911 and hiding his internet porn.

>>9898809
On balance, Dan thought, the uncontrolled forest fire burning its way towards his house was probably a good thing.

>>9904275
>some would call me cheecky, my friends would call me an absolute madman.

>>9904755
no pls

I'm sitting in a car right now that ain't mine. Don't worry where I got it from, you'll know soon enough. E. This thing needs gas almost as badly as I want it to have gas.

>>9898809
I've done this once more; I'll get my books... gonna actually name them this time instead of merely numbering them.

>Living amongst the Dead (1st book, 1st in LatD series, giving 2 sentences since the 1st is rather short)
The stench was the worst part, he had thought. That God awful smell of decay occasionally mingled with that which came from the loss of bowel control brought by death.

>When her 'No' means 'Yes (2nd book, very likely my worst, but the title melts snowflakes and I like that)
Leaning back on the rolled up blankets tucked into the corner of his dorm room’s bed, thereby propping up his body to be in a more comfortable position to work at his laptop, he went about typing.

>Firearm Valhalla (3rd book, planning to write a sequel sometime, most popular non-LatD book)
With a grunt of annoyance, he lay himself down on the ridge of a cliff, left arm reaching forward for the smooth wooden stock of his decades-old rifle to rest on.

>Another One Please, to Dull the Pain (4th book, title too melodramatic I think, genuinely believe it's well-written in spite of the novella being done in about 5 days, needs a little editing though)
“Oh just one more…” he stammered as he rested against the bar, figures whirling around him as he looked up at the bartender.

>Living amongst the Dead: Dark Days (5th book, 2nd in LatD series)
She couldn’t quite stomach the process of him skinning the gutted deer, but was more than favourable of the outcome.

>Living amongst the Dead: On the Road Again (6th book, 3rd in LatD series)
The smoke continued to rise on the horizon, the house that had become Richard and Tiffany’s home lost to flames and the undead.

>Living amongst the Dead: Struggles New and Old (7th book, 4th in the LatD series, three sentences since the first two are very short)
“Da-” a small voice whispered, but was cut off.
“Shhhhhhh…” deep patience. Young eyes looked over from where the lad knelt, brilliant blue, observant as the man trained his rifle.

>Living amongst the Dead: ??? (8th book not yet released, 5th in the LatD series, title not yet fully decided on)
A final look back was given at the face-down corpse, a bullet through its head, and a cloth covering the exit wound on the back of the skull.

That 8th book should be finished by the 20th I think, just today I wrote over 5400 words, damn good stuff.

>>9899584
It's a meme, but it can be made fact.

>Only one enemy remained; two, if we included the ever-present threat of Allah and His minions.

Y-you too...

>>9906788
>dont this once more
I mean I've done this one before. I fucking hate this weird sort of dyslexia I seem to be developing, replacing words with ones that sound vaguely similar. Before and more, how foolish, not even the same number of syllables! Been on the go a lot today and also, as mentioned, wrote for fucking hours. My mind and body are exhausted, but at least the hummus turned out alright.

>>9898950
Not true, putting a fried egg on a burger is fairly common

I hadnt talked to any of them in years, and when I knew I finally had their attention, i said: dance, dance (:

Cheers on the beach party n say hi to reeeeerydon for me

Johnson only had a knack for catching two things: petty shoplifters and the common cold.

You were a bad boy Billy, you were one of the worst, four years sixteen corpses - that's is your legacy.

>>9906862
What part of the world? I'm not the guy you're responding to, and that Jeff Green guy or whatever his name is is a complete meme, but that doesn't mean he's entirely wrong. Eggs seem to be inherently tied with breakfast. To have eggs during some other part of the day just seems weird unless it's egg noodles (I hear those are popular in Asia), bits of egg in Asian dishes, perhaps chopped hardboiled egg in some macaroni salads, or... um... using egg to make burger patties stick together... see how this is so difficult? As for a normal fried egg or hardboiled egg, which is probably the most common ways to have eggs, it's weird to have it at any part of the day other than breakfast. It's a silly and trivial thing to think about, but none the less, I can't really fault him on his logic. the only time it would seem that eggs are used in meals other than breakfast are when it's merely an ingredient in the process of making something else.

When you were young, you were the king of carrot flowers

schindler's list ranks among the great comedies of the 20th century

>>9900195
kek'd

first sentence doesnt mean fucking shit

>>9898813
Holy...

>>9899618
>Thems was good times.
That's a good opener.

>>9907008
Buggs..

>>9898809
The cosmonauts were transfixed with wonderment as the sun set — over the Earth — there lucklessly, untethered Comrade Todd on fire.

>>9903456
Its 100 Year of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. It's my favorite book desu, even though its exactly the type of book I'm normally really against. (i.e. multi-generational family thing)

It's freaking awesome though, you should check it out. I got it for Christmas from a /co/ gift thread.

Other cool names are Aureliano's father Jose Arcadio Buendía, Aureliano Segundo, the wise man Melquíades, Petra Cotes, and Remedios the Beauty, among others.

Time for a biblical story

>I sure hope you paid for this book

>>9898809
>Gender is binary

>>9898809
For me, war is like a fancy dinner party, and I've always got my elbows on the table

Look, I calls em like I sees em. And that my friend, was no penis.

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>>9907751
>Mfw I came up with this one
>mfw I've finally become a meme

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>>9901026
>he sang stepping on the beach and stretched his limbs forward happily.The slime washing up on shore with happy fish all around.

>>9907449
Lay off the Jewish girl's diary

>>9899316
>singing
>debussy
you fucking moron

*record scratch*

>>9903116
buigs... easy on the analogy

Traps are gay.

The building was on fire and it wasn't my fault.

How to get rid of the first line conundrum:
easy mode: write an epistolar novel
advanced: write a bogus prologue until you get in the mood and write something good. Cute everything before that and if it was important, get it in later.

I love you!

(Insert Die Verwandlung's first sentence here)

Despite detailed instructions, sent a number of weeks before his depart – painstakingly translated to his native German, and with a copy in French; a language, which according to the letter of recommendation from both his form-master and Sprachlehrer, he had mastered with an astonishing ability: hewas the 'primus inter pares'; despite all of this, Wilhelm Kappel of Rhinstrasse 34 was unable to find his new home.

>>9898809
>falling for the "interesting" first sentence meme

It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times.

>>9910393
That's freakin' awesome, oh wow! That's legitimately hilarious, if that was the first sentence of a book I'd want to read more immediately. Sweet!

>>9898813
Love.

>>9898809
Tomato gum splattered all over mama's toes and flip flops, and I knew I was going to get it.

>>9898809
It wasn't the bombs that kept Jacob awake.

>>9898854
>screamed across heads and bodies

"Space Crack is a hell of drug" thought Marty as he slowly allowed himself to fall off the bed.

O puer magne, penis dat

>>9910956
>as he allowed himself to slowly fall off the bed.

>>9911034

Don't you ever do that? Especially if you have a hang over, just hang off the end of the bed so the mattress can give way under you and allow yourself to fall? For me the hardest part of waking up is actually getting out of bed, so I just let myself fall out so I have to stand up and then I'm usually awake.

>>9911053
I was rearranging your sentence.

My dick was hard as a rock just thinking about trap. I decided to go for a walk because masturbating's a waste of time.

>>9911071

Why is it better? Not saying its not, I'd hardly a good writer.

i want to smell carrey mulligan's underwear

>>9911122
Idk just sounds better to me.

>>9898809

So it turns out killing her nigger ex-boyfriend didn't win her back; boy did I goof on that one!

>>9898809

Humanity... All of my suffering on this world has been at the hands of humanity, particularly women.

>>9898809
Yep, I fucked her pussy, to learn more you have to read this book that I wrote.

>>9898937
>Chalula files for defamation

>>9911122
The way it is originally reads like the character is slowly but steadily building up the courage to fall off the bed, while the second version has him already moving off the bed, just slowly. There's a subtle difference.

Impadiot - a portmanteau of impatient and idiot -was the first neologism that sprang into Sistine Chapel's mind, as she was trying to find a word for a guy who cums up a girl's nose the moment before she starts giving a blowjob.

She reminded me of a dog, shoving her face into the crotch of every person who entered her life.

>>9911122

>as he slowly allowed himself to fall off the bed.

Implies that Marty is SLOWLY starting to let himself fall, as in "Should I fall?" "Yeah" It's him coming to decision to fall.

>to slowly fall off the bed.

Refers to how fast he is falling off the bad. You place the adverb before the part of the sentence you're modifying.

The young, virgin maiden was pulled along by hair towards the midnight colored wolf's rape dungeon; an evil erection began to grow out from the anthro's sheath, materializing a menacing red phallus which dripped pre-cum like a drooling predator.

>>9898809
Wake up kids, we've got the dreamer's disease.

>>9903116
I like it, reminds me of Chabon. You need a good editor to chop it up thought. But it has the potential to be published.

>>9911071
why? you split his infinitive, at which i actually cringed.

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>>9901026

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>>9898809
SUP BITCHES. It’s Chad Warden here: Aight, I’m talking bout that, PS Triple.

>>9906794
Hit close to home. The media's crying about the danger the "Alt-Right" poses thanks to ONE death when some random drove into an Antifa riot. While ignoring the muslim plot to kill 13 and wound over a hundred with rented cars in Spain paid for by the Muslim brotherhood.

>>9914510
I bet the 10.5 million dollars in Monopoly money given to a terrorist isn't going to go towards supporting terrorism at aaaall... fucking Trudeau j.r.... a Canadian recently got killed in a terror attack in Spain, too.

>>9914589
That faggot should've been executed in Guantanamo

Once upon a time, we used to live, it wasn't easy nor hard, it was just life.

That'd be my first sentence.

>>9914589
Remember the days when we didn't negotiate with terrorists, we just killed them? Muslims love to bitch about those days without seeing why they happened or how they made those days happen, because those days scarred the Mudslimes so much, they still talk about the Crusades centuries after they happened.

>>9915081
Not only that, but the Crusades happened for a FUCKING good reason! From the 600s to the 1000s (when the Crusades happened) and beyond, the Muslims seemed to continuously wage war, and why the fuck shouldn't they? Have you ever READ the Quran? It's pro-war a-f, famalam! It even talks about peace treaties, spending money for war, and over and over and over tells the reader to fight in the name of Allah. SEVERAL passages go over how Muslims will be shamed and 'punished with a painful punishment' if they should refuse to fight in the name of Allah. I'm not joking! They eventually even took Jerusalem which is a major location for Christianity and I hear for Judaism as well. Well you know what, after about 350-400 fucking years of Muslims murdering, raping, enslaving, and unjustly taxing (Jizyah tax) Christians (and just about all other religions they come in contact with) the Christians said ENOUGH is ENOUGH! They went and they fucking FOUGHT, because they have had ENOUGH! Muslim attacks ALL along the north coast of the Mediterranean, as well as on the islands within. They even sacked churches in Rome and desecrated the tombs of St.Peter and St.Paul which, I dunno if you're familiar with them or not, are kind of BIG FUCKING DEALS! That's not far off from Christians finding Prophet Muhammad's burial place and desecrating the fuck out of it!

"Hey lads, who wants bacon? Oh, you've got ham? Niiiiice. Dude! Lovin' the drums with Muhammad's femurs as sticks! HAH! Nice touch using his head as another one, OH SHIT! Did you just crack Prophet Muhammad's fucking SKULL, dude? Hahaha, fuck, they'll be pissed about that! Say, he's looking pretty thin, I bet he's hungry. Let me toss a strip of bacon on his jaw. Might not like it as much as 9 year old pussy, but hey, who am I to judge?"

I support the fucking Crusades, and I'm not entirely against a sequel... I MAD!

>>9899618
Why did i laugh out loud at "boatniggers"

>There are moments, fleeting ones, where I forget that I haven’t gone mad.

rest of the paragraph:
>Not in any dramatic fashion - it just simply slips my mind. I’m not mistaking, during these periods, any true event for a delusion, or questioning in anyway what I know to have happened. I’m not consciously thinking that I’ve gone insane. I just forget that I haven’t.

>>9910956
i think it'd be funnier if it was

"Space Crack is a hell of drug" thought Marty, as he slowly fell off the bed.

In M—, an important town in northern Italy, the widowed Marquise of O—, a lady of unblemished reputation and the mother of several well-brought-up children, inserted the following announcement in the newspapers: that she had, without knowledge of the cause, come to find herself in a certain situation; that she would like the father of the child she was expecting to disclose his identity to her; and that she was resolved, out of consideration for her family, to marry him.

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>>9898809
This thread helped me notice a typo I had made in the first sentence of my book. Thanks /lit/!

>>9916848
Worst place to have a typo.

>>9903331
You had one job XD
>Many years later, as he faced the firing squad, Colonel Aureliano Buendía was to remember that distant afternoon when his father took him to score ice.

>>9916848

Uh.... maybe have someone edit your books before you publish them.........

Green green green, and the buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo, plainly forgotten ajar a jar an inadmissible like substance, a lazy Thursday in July, butterflies fly faster than time on her gaped mouth, everwet with salty saliva undercheek'd, promptly lack'd the height of His Sinewy Grace, the old used King of beatings and meridian torture. Kiss my ass, she thought.

>>9918714
Is this Hemingway?

>>9918719
Does that sentence ring true in your ears?

>>9914510
Takes me a while to realize that not every post here is a first sentence.

>>9899399
I FUCK THE MUSIC WITH MY SERPENT TONGUE

I knew I shouldn't have eaten all those green apples, Gladys thought as her lower bowel made an ominous squelching noise and a single drop of cold sweat rolled down her ass crack.

Phoebe, age 15, very much regretted not having a little sister or brother, but reflecting on the embarrassing moment of earlier that morning when she had walked into her parent’s bedroom at a most inopportune time, she thought Ben Franklin’s list woefully incomplete, for there most certainly were things, besides laws and sausages, that you might like, but you definitely did not want to see being made.

Has anyone really been far as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

>>9902987
Nice

>>9918893
Thanks for making me look up the source for this.

>>9904755
Was it a short story about a woman alone in the wilderness, with no male characters mentioned at all?

>>9910393
You stupid, stupid monkey!

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>>9898809
He removed his pants for me to fellate him once more before he went off to prison, after decades of sexually abusing me, I told him to look up and close his eyes, and pulling out my industrial strength nail gun, I gazed at his penis, that one shot which no one could prevent my taking, I took with delight, with prudence, as though plunged into a new and strange element, as if going forward I had been gently displaced the liquid stream of happiness, and at the same time with a strange feeling of absolute power, and entering at length into an inheritance which had belonged to me from all time, and the 9 inch nail pierced through his penis, scrotum and well into his taint, poking out of the back of his anus.

>>9920617
I will buy this book right fucking now

>>9920617
link pls

I brought my toaster into the bathroom again.

>>9898809
White, white, as far as my Eyes could see I saw white.
It was the White of a fresh Canvas, eagerly awaiting the first brush of colour to bring it to life.
Was that the Reason why she could be found here, on this World? Because she saw this whole World as her Canvas to paint on? No that did not sound right. If anything, it was her followers who, with every Emotion painted, brought Life to all worlds. Yes, that sounded more like the reason she had choosen this place to be her Home.

-> Translated it from my German short story so maybe some mistakes.