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>tfw want to buy Lolita from Amazon >morning express isn't

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Thread replies: 101
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>tfw want to buy Lolita from Amazon
>morning express isn't available so the book would get delivered when at least one of my parents is at home
>"What did you buy, anon? ;)"
What the fuck should I do?
>>
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This is an insurmountable problem. Looks like you'll be reading Chicken Soup for the Pre-teen Soul for now.
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>>9645065
maybe grow the fuck up or something i dunno
>>
>>9645065
>What the fuck should I do?
Find a family that isn't filled with plebs? Or become independent and move out. I'm glad that I don't have to be autistic like this since my mother is familiar with the western canon.

"What did you buy, anon"
"Lolita"
"Oh, that's a good book. I wish I still had all of my old books so that you don't have to keep buying them."
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>>9645085
t. fat NEET
>>
>>9645065
>A book by Vladimir Nabokov.

They won't care after that because they won't know of him.
>>
I never understand these threads. Nobody cares if you read Lolita. Nobody will think you're a pervert. People who know about it know it's a great book, with weird themes, okay, but still a great book. You can read Sade in the Subway, nobody will care. Is that because americans are fucking stupid or something?

Sade and Nabokov are untalented and their books are shit, but that's another story.
>>
>>9645120
>Sade and Nabokov are untalented
Wow that's a really horrible opinion you've got there, anon. Even normies with terrible taste who hate Sade agree that Sade is eloquent and talented. Justine is a satirical masterpiece.
>>
How do I order a dildo to my parent's house so that there's no chance they will intercept it first?
>>
>>9645065
Go out to a bookstore and buy it there.
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>>9645133
I'd probably drop my spaghetti while doing it...
>>
>>9645130
dildos come in discreet packages, usually, and shipped under a "fake" name. My dildo came in brown box with a "computer parts" label. enjoy
>>
What's wrong with Lolita that you have to explain to your parents why you want to read literary art?
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>>9645139
Yes, I'm sure those people that stock the book and are well aware of what it is are going to judge you for reading a piece of classic literature. Jesus Anon. Nobody but you cares about what you're reading.
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>>9645139
Just don't mention to the checkout person that you're going to jack off to it. They don't ask.
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>>9645148
like a typical frogposter, he assumes all normies are drooling retards, and think lolita is cp
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>>9645065
Get it with a group of other, less embarrassing books so they won't care as much. Go on amazon and buy like three other classic books with Lolita. They won't care about the synopsis of every single book, and if you ask them what you bought you can just say "a bunch of books" and show them. Unless this edition of Lolita has a big picture of a naked pre-pubescent girl on the cover, their gonna be interested in that book specifically
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>>9645179
I really fucked up writing this, but I think you all get what I'm saying
>>
>>9645120
>Is that because americans are fucking stupid or something?
it's because in America we have people that actually do care, a lot, and it can be hard to tell who cares about a given thing until it comes up
>>
I read the first part for my dad.
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>>9645147
>tfw you order computer parts and they come in a box discreetly labeled "dildos" so no one thinks you're a nerd
>>
>>9645065
Buy the Library of America Nabokov
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>>9645179
this, but it needs to be with 5 other books to draw less suspicion
>>
>>9645255
I want to get the annotated version desu
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>>9645089
I've been learning russian and I was saying phrases out loud to get used to the sounds then my mum called me out of my room the other day, sat me down and asked me if I had been radicalised. I tried telling her I just wanted to learn another language but she was having none of it, she just glared at me and did the sign of the cross.
You can't reason with some people
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>>9645277
hahaha what the fuck?
>>
>>9645152
I live in Germany and I would have to call them first since I don't think they have it in store. I mean, they probably really don't care but I can't help feeling self conscious.
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>>9645147
ohhh that's awesome! thanks!

just one more question: where did you order yours from?
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>>9645311
why does this post feel malicious?
>>
>Lolita
>>
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>>9645327
... idk ? it's okay though. sorry if I upset u. thanks again
>>
What kind of parents would think less of their child for reading Lolita, how uncultured can parents get?
>>
>>9645065
Get it delivered to your uni or a friend's place and then pick it up later. Why such retardation, Jim?
>>
>>9645120
de Sade is admittedly crap, but although I personally am not a fan of Nabokov I can understand why somebody would like his stuff.
>>
>>9645253
Ordering dildos would actually probably be more normal these days. It's a sad time that we live in.


>>9645304
You could always just ask if they have any books by Vladimir Nabokov instead of specifying. They'll know what book you actually want, but it might help with your autism anxiety.
>>
>Lolita
>Plasir D'amour
>La Confirmacion
>The New Epicurean and Adventures of a Schoolboy
>Secret Lolita: The Confessions of Victor X
My collection is starting to look suspicious.
>>
>>9645065
Get your mum to buy it for you. Mine did.

I don't get why people feel awkward about this stuff. It's great to be able to watch a film in which a prostitute is drowned in a pool of her own turds with your loving Mumsy.
>>
>>9645065
>"A book where a middle-aged man falls in love with a little girl"
Exactly what i said when family asked me what i'm reading, no one cared. Get a better family or fucking kill yourself, i dunno
>>
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>not autistically explaining every book you read to your parents in great detail
>not reading the rapey passages of Lolita out loud while they try and watch the ball game on TV
you're not spednign your teen years right
>>
>>9645304
People buy this book for Uni daily. No one in a book store will give a shit like they don't give a shit about selling shit-tier erotica.
>>
In what shit country do you live that your delivery doesnt get packaged
>>
>>9645750
Of course it gets packaged. But my parents would still ask since I never order anything. I could lie about it but that would be even more pathetic I think, I dunno
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>>9645785
Man
Go too a book store get a different book and when they ask show them that book instead of lolita


Ps: tell your parents to fuck off
>>
>>9645083
>this is a 10 in America
>>
>>9645065
get a fucking ebook or grow a fucking spine you fucking faggot holy shit it's a classic novel
>>
Say "I bought Lolita by Viktor Nabokov" and move on with your life.
>>
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>>9645992
>Viktor Nabokov
>>
>>9645065
>this thread
>eternal recurrence
>>
>>9645999
Vladimir Viktor whatever at least I remembered his last name fuck yourself
>>
>>9645065
it's a widely read book; it'll be at every major book shop, and 90% of secondhand/charity places.
>>
>>9646009
That's like saying Arnold Hemmmingway.
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>>9645161
Who the hell jacks off to Lo-Lee-Ta
>>
>>9645958
You sneer, but i know for a fact every last one of you would fuck her.
>>
>>9646069
/lit/zens like to use their copies of Lolita and Ulysses to form sexual poses the way kids do with barbi/g.i. joe dolls
>>
>>9645065
My parents would have given me my package without opening it or questioning its content.
If they do you're in your right to be offended.
>>
>>9645647
never heard of those last two
>>
>>9645268
It's even more complex. Don't do it
>>
>>9646341
requesting someone to post an example of this
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>>9645065
If you're this worried, you're not ready to read Lolita yet. Lolita requires a serious reader who can comprehend the subtext, not the context.
>>
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>>9646579
Not the example I was looking for, but the only one I could easily find in my folder. IIRC there should also be one of the Ayn Rand's Anthem being fucked by Infinite Jest floating around somewhere, if not, someone should get on it
>>
>>9646596
That stings, though maybe you're right.
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>>9646653
Sorry.... I've been studying, researching, and exploring Lolita for almost 4 years now......
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>>9646641
i read the entire page thinking that was his thumb on the page. i havent been shocked by a penis in a long time, good job.
>>
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>>9646653
Like....extensively desu
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>>9646690
>>9646711
That's actually impressive. I'm glad you got so much out of the novel.
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>>9646722
It never ends!! Nabokov is a genius; every word was written deliberately.
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>>9646037
Timmy Punchin
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>>9645439
ah well, i live in germany so it won't do you much good probably. Just find a website and check out their shipping info. they usually have it written down somewhere
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>>9645065
deliver it to an amazon drop off locker

sage
>>
>>9646748
Jimmy Joyce
>>
>>9648282
How do I do this?
>>
>>9646748
>>9648316

GRR Rowling
>>
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>mom discovers the Peter Sotos collection
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>>9648409
Jay RR Tolkeen
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>>9648412
>tfw my mum just bought me Proxy by Peter Sotos

it's pretty great, i've read PDFs of Pure which is pure garbage, but Proxy is great. Tool in particular is excellent.
>>
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>mfw my parents are super supportive and I never have to hide anything from them, especially not what books I read
>>
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>>9648667
>mfw they're crazy, and I'm crazy, so we still manage to be fucked up
>>
>>9645999
what on earth is tiger tail ice cream

>>9646332
well yeah
i would probably bury my face between her tits until i died of asphyxiation
>>
>>9648679
google says it's orange and licorice and only found in canada
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>>9648412
>dad found the ComicLO stash
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>>9645475
>But although
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>>9645065
For the love of fuck, have it shipped to the post office then go to pick it up there. It's ordering a book online. It's not hard to do.
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>>9650418
Okay, I'll do that. But how do they know that it's my package? Like, is my name on there? And what happens to the receipt and stuff?
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>>9650560
holy fuck! how old are you?
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>>9650582
18...I've never ordered anything online before.
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>>9645065
Just buy it together with some other innocuous classics.
>>
>>9650585
>18
you're a liar
>>
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>>9650592
I'm not. I'm barely 18 but still 18
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>>9650599
Are you amish then? Why have you never ordered anything online? Why don't you know how the fucking postage system works?
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>>9650604
Because I've just never done so before. I mean, I bought stuff online but only on Steam
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>>9650609
I am baffled
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>>9650609
>>9650611
Milennials.
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>>9645277
Sounds like she is the radical. Whether you like or hate Trump, I hope we can all come to agreement that the corporate media is fucking evil.
>>
>>9645083
This thing is fucking gross please delete it
>>
Just do be a total fucking fag about it.
Its a piece of literature, not some futanari porn featuring 2000 year old vampire lolis.
>>
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>>9645264
Listen to the above OP, but for the love of god get a copy with an inconspicuous cover like pic.
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>>9654639
>anon why do you have a book with little girls panties on the cover?
>>
what's the correct translation for Lolita?
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>>9655431
Nabokov wrote Lolita both in English and Russian so any english copy will have the same text
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>>9655025
>oh, haha! I thought those were panties for a second. I'm hungry, let's order pizza.
>>
>>9645065
funny thing
my mum one day came with a book for me and it was fucking lolita with a loli feet on its cover
Thread posts: 101
Thread images: 13


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