ITT: Favourite opening lines >I wish either my father or

"As sirenes tocaram a noite inteira, sem parar. Todavia, pior que as sirenes, foi o navio que afundava, enquanto as cabeças das crianças explodiam."

I am an American, Chicago born – Chicago, that somber city – and go at things as I have taught myself, free-style, and will make the record in my own way: first to knock, first admitted; sometimes an innocent knock, sometimes a not so innocent. But a man's character is his fate, says Heraclitus, and in the end there isn't any way to disguise the nature of the knocks by acoustical work on the door or gloving the knuckles.

>>9442879
heuheuheu i know this one

>>9442887
De onde é isso?

>>9442879
'The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new.'

I've always loved Zarathustra wandering down from the mountain, being told that the masses are not worth the time to bother, then being left to bury the dead trapeze artist

This man thinks he knows everything, and when he starts talking he thinks everyone will immediatlyt just "know" he's right, but then he gets a hard dose of reality.

The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel.

riverrun, past Eve and Adam's, from swerve of shore to bend of bay, brings us by a commodius vicus of recirculation back to Howth Castle and Environs.

>>9442879
it seems kind of pretentious
>waaah, i was born, and i didn't ask for this
>my parents weren't just a normal couple who decided to have sex because of chemical impulses in the brain that compelled them to breed
>if only my birth was planned better
>i am so very special, and use flashy prose

what is so special about this?

>>9442879
>in my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I’ve been turning over in my mind ever since.
“Whenever you feel like criticizing any one,” he told me, “just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that you’ve had.”
He didn’t say any more, but we’ve always been unusually communicative in a reserved way, and I understood that he meant a great deal more than that. In consequence, I’m inclined to reserve all judgments, a habit that has opened up many curious natures to me and also made me the victim of not a few veteran bores.

>>9444964
You should probably read Tristram Shandy before making these kinds of comments, couldn't be further off base

Call me Ishmael.

>>9444970
never even heard of it. if it's meant to be humorous, i could see the appeal, but the quote alone without context doesn't really explain much.

When the race of Space Sasquatch invaders landed on Earth, they had but one goal: Capture every attractive virgin female aged 14-22 and take them as breeding sex slaves. Naturally, this was an unpopular proposition with the Earth men who desired to keep such females for their own breeding needs. So began the great Sasquatch-Human War which was to last for generations and plunge the Galaxy into war.

>>9444975
Google says it's humorous and also from the 16th century

>>9445003
G O O G L E
O
O
G
L
E

>>9445003
18th*

>>9444964

>Not knowing Tristram means "of sorrowful birth"

>Not having read the entirety of The Tale of Sir Tristram of Lyonness

>being this pleb in 2017