>"Your cover letter was one of the best I've reviewed

>>9423809
99% of job hires are contact based. the kind of degree you have is a spook.

>>9423822
>99% of job hires are contact based.
Can confirm: my friend got me my current job.

>>9423822
so what you're telling me is i'll never get hired?

>>9423809
My diary desu

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>>9423809
>having access to career/salary data before choosing your English major
>having access to a public library and the internet before choosing your English major
>having public access to top universities' English course curriculum and their syllabuses/reading lists via MIT OpenCourseWare and similar resources since 1999, likely before choosing your English major
>claiming to be "well read", you didn't bother reading any of this data
>or worse - you did read it and concluded that you should spend $100k-200k to try to learn it while being surrounded by dozens/hundreds of people who are equally poor decision makers, being taught by even poorer decision makers, who are managed by department heads who have never contributed to literature and just talk about it
>despite all of this blatant stupidity, you expect employers (who are definitely not in the field of literature) to take you seriously

no one feels sorry for you. you brought 100% of this on yourself. if you have gotten an english/literature degree in the last 20 years, not supplemented with a double major in philosophy or something to indicate you are a deep enough thinker to justify your degree with the fact that the art of literature is your true passion/bliss that makes you feel at peace with existence (which is probably less than 1% of you), then you have no business even being able to read words, and you should straight up kill yourself.

>>9423961
>not supplemented with a double major in philosophy
Your post is literally shit but this just turns it into putrescine

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>made a Todd Howard copy pasta on /v/ that got posted a few times
living the dream

>>9424079
post it plz

>English degree
I actually wrote an essay that made a teacher expel me from class while the essay corrector wanted to give a perfect score

I wrote an obscene pamphlet that got me arrested.

I drew cusswords on my dorm windows and got expelled.