>"Sorry, what's your name again? Oh ok, and you're

i wrote in hypersphere and totalitarianism in a sauna

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>>9168530

"I don't want to go to some lame YA party. Later on, squares."

>>9168530
i show them my published book obviously

https://www.amazon.ca/There-Sun-Here-Eric-VanderHelm-ebook/dp/B00AYIBPJI

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>>9168542
This you?

>>9168544
yep

>>9168530
I'll author a real mean post about you on facebook, unless you apologize right now.

>>9168530
'Technically I still write things. Being published is irrelevant.'

Because they're shitty YA authors they'll have trouble deconstructing my obtuse argument and I'll just walk past them.

inb4 alfafa as fug etc

>>9168566
Holy......I want more.....

>>9168566
>>9168538
They're not YA authors, stupid.

The girl in the middle, Sally Rooney, just turned 25 and sold her debut novel ("Conversations With Friends") for a six-figure sum.

Summary:

>"Frances is a cool-headed and darkly observant young woman, vaguely pursuing a career in writing while studying in Dublin. Her best friend and comrade-in-arms is the beautiful and endlessly self-possessed Bobbi. At a local poetry performance one night, Frances and Bobbi catch the eye of Melissa, a well-known photographer, and as the girls are then gradually drawn into Melissa’s world, Frances is reluctantly impressed by the older woman’s sophisticated home and tall, handsome husband, Nick. However amusing and ironic Frances and Nick’s flirtation seems at first, it gives way to a strange intimacy, and Frances’s friendship with Bobbi begins to fracture. As Frances tries to keep her life in check, her relationships increasingly resist her control: with Nick, with her difficult and unhappy father, and finally, terribly, with Bobbi. "

>>9168556
>Alex Corvus' cheeks were also a flooded road.

What did he mean by this?

>>9168530
UIf they're going to be cunts about it, I'd just leave if they aren't going to let me in. I'd definitely ask if I could just wander around anyways, but if they're adamant, just leave.
Or maybe pretend to be a fan of someone.
>>9168575
>Summary:
Sounds like shit

>>9168575
>darkly observant

what did she mean by this?

>>9168575
>central character is a writer

Sounds like another triumph of the 21st century literary imagination.

>>9168597
>author is 25
>author just made at least $50k writing her debut novel

It really suck to be you, huh?

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>>9168597

>the author is a young woman struggling to become a writer
>the protagonist is a young woman struggling to become a writer
>sold for a six-figure sum

>>9168599
You can also make 50k pretty quickly selling heroin.

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>>9168599
>It really suck to be you, huh?
Do you think I'm some struggling writer, or something? Another failure of imagination ...

I've published several poems in my friends anarchist zine, bitch. Now, if you excuse me, I've got free wine to drink.

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>>9168530
>Wer einst zu verkünden hat, schweigt viel in sich hinein.
>Wer einst den Blitz zu Zünden hat, muss lange – Wolke sein!
And then I run away with my arms behind my back desu

>>9168530
I know the guy on the left. He most certainly hasn't published anything. Otherwise I'd never hear the end of it.

>>9168647
No, you don't.

>>9168655
Micheal Barton. Studied History and politics in Trinity, Dublin. We used to compete against one another in short story competitions.

>>9168530
Does a regular column in a weekly local newspaper count?

>>9168669
Looks like he won.

>>9168669
Were you that lad who tried out for debate team and got laughed out of the room?

>>9168680
By what metric? Being in a picture beside a published author? I guess he's got me there.

>>9168530
I spit in their faces

>>9168687
He's a part of the in-crowd, loser. If he wants his work published he can just ring up Ms Rooney or another of his literary friends and say "Hey, I have a novel that I want to publish. How can you help?" and within days the eyes of a seasoned editor will be reading the contents of his imagination with astonishment and delight. Meanwhile, you are sitting in your room on your laptop, in total silence, with no lights on, in your boxer shorts no doubt, refreshing a page on notorious the racist forum and general loserfest of 4 Chan. Where's your book contract? Where's your photograph in the paper? Who the fuck even are you?

>>9168700
Sounds like you're projecting, buddy.

>>9168599
Sasha Grey made good money rimmimg some gross dudes, your point is...?

My name is Jon, and this is my glock 17. Prepare to die.

>>9168700
>>9168669
>>9168647
>>9168575
>>9168530
Posting a pic of yourself with a YA author and pretending you're published has to be in the top ten of pathetic shit I've seen on 4chan, somewhere between the guy that listened to a single Linkin Park song 60 thousand times and the guy that paid 150 dollars to get raped by a tranny.

>>9168700
well he'll be dead one day so it doesn't really matter, we'll be even then

>>9168740
Ummm, but what if you ARE published? Ever consider that lad?

>>9168747
Not really. His essential spirit will continue to exist via wikipedia and the internet in general, while your essential spirit will be instantly extinguished, never to be considered ever again outside of your ma's thoughts.

>>9168700
This post made my day. What a sad man must you be to write all that shit. He's not published but he could use influences instead of talent to get published, wow. We're all jelly as fuck, please stop being such a winner, I couldn't handle it.

>>9168599
That doesn't make her a good writer. The "main character is a writer" Trope has already been done to death and barely ever done well.

>>9168530
I show them the reams of poorly constructed, unedited erotica I've self published and proclaim myself the "James Joyce of Evangelion-Werewolf-Vore".

>>9168762
Nothing much going on for you today, then.

>>9168599
>$50k is a lot
God damn it feels good being middle class.

>>9168700
You're right.

4chan truly is the most fulfilling life.

Is it better to have published a terrible piece of YA trash or to have published nothing at all?

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>>9168700

>t.

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>>9168530
>Oh ok, and you're a published author, right?
I am

>>9168765
what about the "main character is a depressed neet loser" trope?
tell me quick before I hit submit on this draft

>>9169089
Just do it. Worst thing they can do is say no.

>>9168530
Reminder that women want to be fucked by male writers who write about women, in good or bad.

>>9169137
>Worst thing they can do is say no.
And add you to their shit-list, so they can ignore any future submissions.

>>9169159
That's what pseudonyms are for.

>>9169163
Could work, as long as you change your address too.

This is the age of shared data. It wouldn't surprise me if publishers kept a centralised list of no-hopers, for use throughout the industry. It would save them a whole lot of time and labour.

>>9169297
Different publishing houses have an inherent interest in their competitors wading through torrents of shit. It's probable that some publishers collaborate and share rescources but the majority don't, much for the same reason that McDonalds and Burgerking don't share consumer data.

>>9168738
best answer so far.

>>9168700
being in the paper is not an honor, more like the reverse, because it means journalists noticed you and journalists are UNIVERSALLY complete subhumans who should be legally disallowed from holding work or receiving charity

>>9168530

>2017
>Being published whilst you're still alive
>Admitting that you are motivated by avarice, vanity and the need of fame
>Not withholding all of your material to be published posthumously, which is when it really counts

Later, losers.

>>9169340
It's the kind of thing a third-party developer might come up with. A sort of "credibility rating agency" for would-be authors. Publishers would submit their data and pay a fee to access the central database.

If it works in the credit industry, it could work for publishing. Might be a business opportunity worth pursuing, if it hasn't been already.

>>9168968
Overwhelmingly, nothing. Most YA authors would have made more money if they had spent their time flipping burgers instead of writing. When you get to the point where you're making more than you would have otherwise, the threshhold becomes your self-awareness and appetite for shame. How much of a raise would you accept in exchange for the private and public knowledge that you are a hack?

Hey that's the Dublin Chapters, that's where I shop

>>9169640
H&F on Dawson Street is more comprehensive and better laid out, honestly.

>>9169652

Yeah, but Chapters has that dirt cheap second hand section upstairs

>>9169652
>>9169640
>>9169659
Are either of you published authors? Don't reply if not.

>>9169667

I've published scientific papers, does that count?

>>9169667
Just short stories online and in a couple of magazines.

>>9168530
"Well Id like to get published, so Im kinda here to hear about other people's experiences and maybe learn a thing or two."

>>9168530
Thwack the bridge of their noses with my actual, tangible book, then berate then like they deserve.

>>9168530
Are these three Polacks famous?

>>9169681
Girl here. I'd have turned away by the fifth word.

>>9168595
Betacarotene deficiency

I would lie about it, make up a name of a book and a plot for it on the spot. All the hipsters will pretend to have heard of it and I'm in.

>>9168530
link them to my halo X my little pony fan fiction and ask them if it counts.

>>9168599
I made $50k at 23 killing babies in third world countries. Then I made $60k to sit around and read books. I got a triplet of buddies out in Silicon Valley all pulling in mid six-figures, all under 25, to code shitty phone apps.

Oh, but you're impressed because someone else wrote one of hundreds of thousands of books that gets published a year, but her drivel was the right kind of stupidity to get snatched for by a publisher so that publisher can cash in on the inevitable Netflix mini-series or Fall seasonal movie.

Breh, get over it. Literally billions of people make money doing things. Millions of people make money doing they things they love. It is not special or unique, at all, and pretending like it is is a surefire way to out yourself as a child.

>>9168530
Do actual publishing companies only consider publishing works by someone who's already published in magazines, journals, newspapers, etc?

Do they just ignore aspiring writers who haven't published anything before hand?

>>9168599
>caring about money

She's going to blow it on purses and cocktails, hoping the guy who rails her that night won't leave her in the morning like all the others have.