Hey /lit/ can you rate my short story? I spent 4 weeks writi

th prologue is already killing it.
it is like a joke that you have to explain. it's not funny anymore. besides, stop it already with the me vs sheeple crap

>>9044086
the first paragraph and I'm already annoyed. If I wanted ham-fisted philosophy, I'd watch shonen anime. Sorry, OP

Can you at least comment on the sexual part? It comes in around page 57. I worked extra hard on that part to make it good, please say something nice about it

>>9044266
i won't read 57 pages of that but i will read that scene. because you asked nicely

>>9044266
i'm really sorry anon but it is horrible. you should take "show don't tell" deeply serious. your sex scene was just a list of clichées and it is painfully obvious that it was written by a very young and inexperienced male.
i salut you for actually writing and FINISHING something, though! not many follow trough. take this as constructive criticism and try to do better next time.

Before you read a story three things come to mind.
!) what does it offer me? Does it relate to my life?
2) Is it entertaining and why?
3) Will I learn anything from it?
Answer those three questions to my satisfaction and i'll read it. If you can't answer those questions don't bother, i'll most likely suck.

>>9044458
how could op know if it would relate to your life?
how could he know what is entertaining to you?
how could he know what you already know and what you don't?

>>9044472
because theirs a few assumptions maybe arrogant assumptions a writer has to make if they want it to be good. If your not arrogant enough to not think your work is going to be entertaining to the masses you should stop.
If you don't think you have something to teach you are too stupid to write. And if you don't think your writing has anything to offer, why write?

>>9044086
Keep at it. This isn't there yet, but if you really want to write keep honing your craft.

>>9044086
Did I just get trolled? Not like a read it or anything, that's not a 'short story', how can someone how posts here not know what a short story is?

>>9044086
> ~80 pages
> Not knowing the difference between Short Story and Novella.
Lurk moar.

>>9044266
Only came to say >>9045145