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Pretending you read > actually reading
Actually reading:
>boring
>waste of time
>lots of words
>nerd glasses because you read with bad lighting too much
>pretentious
>"anon, do you want to come to the party.. oh, i see you are reading again. maybe next time :)"
>start playing video games out of frustration
>handing in your book reports too late because you overthink it and write up a whole bunch of garbage in a pathetic attempt to appear intellectual while everyone else just wrote a page or two
>social outcast
>loser
>you forget everything you read anyways
>"you spend all your time reading anon, recommend me a book!" "u-uhm Lolita b-by Nobako-" "isn't that about a pedophile, anon? are you a pedophile?" "n-n-n-o, i-i...."
>virginity
>no sleep because books are too long
Pretending you read:
>"oh anon you are so smart!"
>lots pretty books on the shelf
>smart
>educated
>rensaisance man
>life of the party
>popular
>"you are a well read and greatly educated man, can you recommend me a book so that i may ascend to become even the ever palest shadow of your greatness?" "you are a great friend of mine mark, we have known each other since our early childhood where we spent much time on the sports field. i know your father was and might very well still be an alcoholic, so i believe the portrayal of alcoholism in Under the Volcano by Malcolm Lowry will deeply connect with you on a very personal and intimate level. it has great prose."
>success
>fast cars, the knowledge how to operate them and the understanding that self help books are for weak minded pussies
>well dressed
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>>8860786
Id rather be the first one, since i am that.
Kinda funny deserved a (you)
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I literally haven't read a book in at least two years, but I'm here 24/7 and start arguments over shit I've never read all the time. I know exactly what presses people's buttons at this point.
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>>8860794
pretty sad to be honest anon
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>>8860794
living the dream
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>>8860794
holy fuck there's other ppl like me here ;^)
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>>8860831
We slap each other hi-five. Dave pulls out a vial of coke, but it's kind of shitty, and Keanu Reeves and Joaquin Phoenix come over and Dave is shaking and you ask Joaquin about his hairlip and someone who I think is Nicole Kidman in a burkha sits down and we're all on ecstasy and Dave is looking at the table whispering to himself. I glare at him.
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>>8860786
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Stop posting this garbarge already.
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>>8860842
The silence was deafening. I mutter hastily under my breath, "One enemy remained; Two if you counted my diary desu".
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>>8860852
'What-was-that?" I ask Dave, his face wet with fake tears. "Just something I'm working on," he mumbles and the table explodes with laughter as Nicole Kidman takes off her burkha—it's really Kevin Hart—and Joaquin gushes "Oh you niglette!" And Dave stands up undoing his belt asking "Kafkan? Kafkaesque?" to no one in particular, the table really and you launch into a speech about knowledge and using Wikipedia talk pages to come up with clever questions about books "only faggots" read, which my understanding is all self-styled readers, and Kevin Hart is now standing on the table pretending to be a chicken and we aren't laughing.
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>>8860870
is dave david foster wallace?
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>>8860895
That's why we read the books. To get the jokes, pham.
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>>8860910
i was just pretending to ask you idiot, it's in refference to finnagans wake
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>>8860831
Probably many more than you think
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>>8860916
Its "Finnigan's Wake" dummy
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>>8860786
If you ever meet anyone well versed in a subject, or book, you will be fucked so fast, and found out as the pathetic layman you are.
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>>8862817
Not if I learn the tricks. Worked for DFW.
Thread posts: 18
Thread images: 6
Thread images: 6