I'm planning on writing a story in which the protagonist,

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I'm planning on writing a story in which the protagonist, maybe in a stream of consciousness style, will oscilate between his past (in which he believed in a project and gradually burned out without ever achieving anything) and his present (in which he tries to bring back the past, distorted by his present perception as a period of efervescence and juvenile enthusiasm).
Just as a detail of his nostalgia, I might introduce some mentions of ephebophilia (not younger that 18 tho) in his present life, but I still don't know if it should be heterosexual or homosexual. He would fuck the teenager only as a way of trying to bring back what he felt about sex back when he was young. I guess that if he fucked a girl, he'd do in order to contemplate her juvenile enthusiasm, like she wants him to know he's already an adult and shit. If he fucked a young guy, I guess he would be searching for the feels he felt during his youth, when he had an equally young male lover. I'm planning to make the adult man an average joe, so he would be the only one that knows about his homosexuality and the relationship. He's married now and shit.
So it would be trying to simulate the past (gay shit) or trying to contemplate the past (straight shit). What do? What would make the story look less like a story about fucking teens and more like a story about wanting to bring back the past?