I'm writing a short story that I'm considering publishing

>>8762729
In the time close to my passing I'm reminded of things I least expected to take my conscious. I think not of regrets or mistakes, happiness eludes me, and I am without sadness. What has taken my mind leaves me stricken with fear and a horrible curiosity for the unknown. Memories of them always hiding away, watching over me, laughing in beastly tongues, and speaking without form. They've been there since I was young. I was less aware of them then since my understanding of reality was malleable and my wits weren't about me but they were there.

You aren't ready to be published. Maybe you meant to post more, but this is just full of errors and pretentious as all hell.

>>8762734
Can you point out the errors for me? It's just the first paragraph here.

>>8762736
The first sentence doesn't mean anything. You put ", and" in the second. The third is missing an object, as does the fourth and fifth.

>>8762730
Simplicity is impotant my african american

>>8762747
>in the time close to my passing
As I'm nearing my death
>I'm reminded of things I least expected to take my conscious
My head is filled with thoughts I did not expect.

Am I the wrong words in the story or am I just not seeing how the first sentence means nothing?

>>8762730
I guess I'll just post another paragraph. This is the third one.

The intent behind their gruesome acts is entirely beyond me, for what message could possibly be behind disturbing hopeless people like myself? What am I to learn from my furniture flying across the household, or my bedsheets being torn away as I attempt to sleep? How can someone make any sane interpretations from observing manifestations of the impossible? One could try to suggest these events are caused by the unrest spirits of the dead, or that these scenes are just the aftermath of actions taken by eldritch beings, but this is all still speculation.