>write what you know >but the main character shouldn't

You're not actually supposed to take any of those things literally.

Anon opened the thread listening to his wife's wet whispering farts.The perfume of her hole assailed him and set his fingers to shitpost. Astride his chair he shitposted on and spat and shitposted more with men across the world all entwined in the ungodly net that spans the globe like an intricate web of a spider that is not of this world. He spat. Lo! my dear wife! A calm board and a mild, mild thread. Four years ago -- four years ago! -- I made my first shitpost in a such a thread! An underage anonymous! Four years of continual shitposting! Four years of wanking, and tendies, and shitstorm-time! Four years on the pitiless internet! For four years has this hacker forsaken the peaceful reality, for four years to make war on the memes of the deep web! 4Chan seemed unearthly. He was accustomed to look upon the shackled form of a conquered meme, but there — there you could look at it monstrous and free. Or perhaps he'd had too much punch in his kirsch that night. It was indeed the crossroads of his mortal life, and he had to celebrate. Some natural tears he dropped, but wiped them soon; the internet was all before him, where to choose his place of rest, and Providence his guide: his dick in hand with wandering eyes and slow
jerks he took to his solitary ways.

File: man, boy, and donkey walk into a tijuanan bar.png (184KB, 488x557px) Image search: [Google]

184KB, 488x557px

>>8519498
Wow nigger maybe read some fables.

>>8519538
>too much punch in his kirsch
Don't you men too much kirsch in his punch?

>>8519498

Learn to golden mean, m8.

Anyway, don't fucking try to write like you're following an instruction guide. Honestly the only way you're going to get good is by writing a ton (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbC4gqZGPSY), preferably while reacting intelligently to criticism. Hopefully you're also reasonably well-read, especially in the kind of literature you want to write. The only good this kind of rationalization is for, speaking as a fairly experienced (though still unpublished) creative writer, is that when you get stuck you can think your way back into writing until instinct takes over again. As Knausgaard, or whoever the fuck it was, says writing a book is like sleepwalking.

>>8519542
Why was the old man following them though? Does he just follow people around til they fuck up and then say "I told you so"?

>>8519602
That's the joke, I'm guessing.