Someone type the first 5 lines of the bible if instead of lucifer

God and Lucifer were cast out of heaven together for being gay. When they got down to the mortal world, the sex they were having wasn't nearly as heavenly *smirks*. Beings in heaven can see and fuck in the 4th spatial dimension, so God rimming Satan's sweet, sweet cumhole wasn't nearly as satisfying. However, getting pegged by Lucifer's thorny cock was as devilish as ever. In the end, the swallowed one another's loads and gaped each other's assholes until they were so sweaty and tired they just couldn't fuck anymore.

>>8391711
What the reader needs to understand here, is that God and lucifer did not miss heaven. They were happy to be fucking. And that's a lesson we all can learn from.

>>8391718
When God and Lucifer awoke in the morning, their cocks smelled of cum and sweet smelling oils, used as lubricant. They climbed into the river with one another and began to have underwater ass sex. God bent Satan over the riverbank and pulled his arms back behind him. Helpless, the demon yelped in pain as God stretched his asshole with his holy member. With three final, heaving thrusts, God emptied his load into Satan's hole, leaving his anus gaping, and with semen leaking out and running away with the stream.

>>8391807
This is hot. I'm glad god and lucifer worked things out and stopped bullshitting each other about humans

>>8391813
Well, the story isn't quite over.

God and Lucifer pulled themselves out of the river, and collapsed under the sun, panting sexily.

"You know," said the devil, "A fantasy of mine is to be forced to pleasure a cock with my asshole and also my mouth at the same time" he went on. "What if we created some sort of being in our image to help complete this circle of pure homosexuality?"

"Sounds great" said God, smiling.

Snap, the first Human was born, Adam. Immediately he hung his erect cock over Satan's cum stained lips. God rolled over that red ass and began working it like there was no tomorrow. Adam grabbed Satan by the throat and pulled his head up, demanding he open his mouth and suck. The demon obeyed, taking the cock as deep in his throat as he could. Before Lucifer even knew what was happening, he was full of cum on both ends. They all began to cuddle, having had their fill of steamy, arousing sex.

"You know", whispered God, "Earth isn't so bad after all..."

They all fell asleep smiling.

>>8391936
Now, it's a common misconception that there was a woman who was romantically involved with Adam, and they call her Eve.

You see, all of the beings from Heaven are androgynous. The most beautiful and perfect beings, androgynous people can fit any sexual role, which is was ideal for God's vision of paradise.

So in truth, Eve was merely a roleplay character, created by God for Adam, where he was to dress in scantily clad lingerie, modeled after what they had in the sexiest strip clubs in heaven.

God and the Devil double penetrated "Eve's" perfect, tight, pink little asshole. WIth their cocks rubbing together, it only took minutes for them to shoot their thick, sticky semen inside of dear Eve's precious hole.

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>>8391936
So satan and god fuck. Create adam to only further their fucking experiences. What does that make humankind?

>>8391974
Well I'm not sure how to answer that but I guess it explains the gay at least.

>>8391688
My middle name is French for Lucifer and I'm fucking lit.

>what is etymology

>>8391973
After weeks of role play, gaping and stretching, cum guzzling and cock riding, God, Satan, and Eve were tired of their fucking rituals. Jehovah and Lucifer knew the pleasures of sex in the 4th dimension, and they wanted it back. They started to consume mass quantities of LSD and DMT to enhance their orgasmic experiences. After weeks of tripping absolute nut sack, and rubbing their cocks raw, they were completely fried. In an existential frenzy from the psychedelic drugs, they made a suicide pact.

God created two human beings devoid of any knowledge or morals, a man and a woman, and set them loose upon the world. They formed a train, with God's cock in Satan's ass, and with Satan's cock stretching Eve's little ass. Then God sent down three lightning bolts upon their heads. The electricity sent a friction through the conducting rod's that were deep inside one another's holes, and they had one last electric orgasm to conclude their life.

With the death of God, and the death of Satan, there was no more Heaven or Hell. The idea ceased to go on. All of Earth's history has been through dumb luck, and insane blood lust, spite. People are vicious. Only through homosexuality can we restore what we once had, and that is perfect balance.

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>>8392007
This is good material for the Aniversery of the new testament. And the new testament was written on the Aniversery of the old testament. So it all adds up. As homosexuality and nonbinary culture florish, the bible must add a 3rd chapter to its saga