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http://www.johnjosephadams.com/the- living-dead/free-stories

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Thread replies: 10
Thread images: 3

File: George-RR-Martin.jpg (68KB, 610x366px) Image search: [Google]
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http://www.johnjosephadams.com/the-living-dead/free-stories-excerpts/meathouse-man-by-george-r-r-martin/

This is a man who's won awards for his writing. This is a man who's considered a professional editor. But just look at that fucking prose. The punctuation is so off that it actually hurts to read it, and yet he's considered a professional.

Why the fuck has the art of writing degraded to this?
>>
File: tips.jpg (26KB, 213x237px) Image search: [Google]
tips.jpg
26KB, 213x237px
>>8135561
>I know better than an established author who has many published books and who has been writing for 40 years
>>
>>8135561
le wrong generation xd
>>
>>8135588

If you can't see his glaring faults, you shouldn't even be here.

>>8135589

Not even slightly.
>>
>>8135561
He found a line and pulled on it, fighting toward the hatch to get himself below out of the storm, but a gust of wind knocked his feet from under him and a second slammed him into the rail and there he clung. Rain lashed at his face, blinding him. His mouth was full of blood again. The ship groaned and growled beneath him like a constipated fat man straining to shit.
>>
File: nig tip.jpg (16KB, 214x317px) Image search: [Google]
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>>8135597
>If you can't see his glaring faults, you shouldn't even be here.
>>
>>8135608

>He found a line and pulled on it, fighting toward the hatch to get himself below out of the storm, but a gust of wind knocked his feet from under him and a second slammed him into the rail and there he clung.

"And there he clung" should have been its own sentence. Also, a comma is needed between "below" and "out".

>Rain lashed at his face, blinding him. His mouth was full of blood again.

Fine.

>The ship groaned and growled beneath him like a constipated fat man straining to shit.

That's just taking the piss.
>>
>>8135619

>"look mum, I used the hat meme again!"
>>
>>8135619
wait, /lit/ likes grrm again? ahahaha
>>
>>8135608
>The ship groaned and growled beneath him like a constipated fat man straining to shit.

grrm self-inserting big time here
Thread posts: 10
Thread images: 3


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