ITT the dumbest fucking names you've made up for characters

>Gertrude Bismarck

It still hurts to think about that one

>>7324094
Vendigo Honduras and Donovan Morgenstern

I think they're still good names for noir detectives going deep undercover as gay porn actors

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>Jake Bidness

To be fair, it's an alias and it's established as being dumb in universe, but even then.

>>7324094

I'tan Samar

I thought I was pretty clever at the time because the culture the character comes from has it "Surname First, First-name" last, so the reference isn't clear until you switch the names around into a western order.

>>7324131
wewf

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Charles Bloodbath and Evan Massacre.

>>7324094
>tfw one of those names is very similar to my real name

>>7324131

>pretty clever

Sorry, but that's elementary school level. Those are the kind of riddles my parents would make for my birthday party treasure hunts when I was 10.

>>7324253
Reading comprehension anon.

The characters in the short story I'm writing are pretty stupid
The main characters (two CIA agents) are both named after mythological spears/spear-throwers.

>Gary Bog Cullain Jr.
Usually just G. B. or Cullain.

>Howard Mistle

>>7324321

I would prefer not to.

>>7324094
My wife never tires of telling me that Elyse Patience is a terrible name for the semi-romantic interest/positive foil to my main character's impulsiveness. But there's something in me that wants this shit to be blunt, iunno.

>>7324443

>Female having a Virtue as a name

For once a woman is right, that's an awful name.

>>7324448
OK, let's say I change it despite my intuitions to the contrary. Can we make it less shit without removing all sense of at least some amount of patience from the character even at her naming?

Hiro Protagonist

>>7324456

Naming your character Patience to reflect she has patience is just as terrible as naming your character Raven to reflect she has raven-black hair.

Character personality traits should exist independently of accidentals such as name.

My parents didn't name me Cynic Bitterman because they had no idea that's how I'd turn out when I was born. How did Elyse's parents know she'd be patient?

>>7324094
Had a pseudo-suicidal girl who changed her name to Marie to do as the French sound it, but would be referenced in her third person as Mary when she was being truthful.

>>7324465
I get all of that, I really do. I was quite literally naming her Patience to break believability a little bit; to lend a bit of the "legend" or "fairy tale" aspect to the story, much as "Hiro Protagonist" does for Snow Crash.

I'm open to suggestions about alternative names.

Also P.S. - Patience is the surname; her parents didn't have a choice about that one.

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>>7324094
>Art Polach

And I had just forgotten that retched name.

Andria yee.

>>7324094
Yee Dinosauri & Baba Ba Babababa

>>7324094
Ricarda-Amelie Freifrau von Bulthaup-Haggenau

Most of these are actually great name. Didn't you learn anything from papa Pynch?

Maximillion Sinistee

Horse.
His name is just Horse.

>>7325169
I named one character Ocell (means bird) and another one Foll (means crazy).

Major Major Major Major

>Anaïs Thumpkin
fucking kek

>>7325413

What is this, Kim Possible?

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>>7325453
>Doesn't get the Catch-22 reference

ITT: The Rowling school of shitty name conventions

>>7324094
>Obsidian Forge.

He's not black, at least.

>>7325435
lol it's silly as fuck but I like it.

>>7324422
the villain's name should be linus long

Sal Paradise

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>>7324094
>having names
>having characters

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>>7324094

>The Archon
>Sophia
I regret trying to write science fiction with a 'Gnostic symbolism' angle to it.
pls no bully

Severian. Just Severian.

>>7324465
What about Ahab and Ishmael?

>>7324154
P gay desu

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Rocco Rosso
Ramona Romano
Magnarr Magnarson
Vasilij Georgijevič Dragunov

>the kid
jfc what was i thinking

Napoleon Innocent

"O" (character in some ways alludes to Othello)

Those are the only two names I have for my novel, which I've only just started making notes for. I have other characters, but I can't seem to name them.

>>7326064
Hello Gene

Brie Kinderwahl
Monsieur Poignée-Fromage
Neronymus

Atra Vôche
Giacommo Brunelli

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>Pig Bodine

I can't show my face in public again after coming up with a shitty name like that.

>>7326067

No one said Moby Dick was perfect.