What influence did your parent have on you? Good, bad, ugly?

>>8552870
Shit that's interesting to think about

My mom realized I wanted to be a girl when I was four and basically tortured me for it my whole life. I'm 25 and still live as a guy because she successfully conditioned me to feel nausea and immense self hatred every time I try to act natural (feminine) and I have nightmares about her almost every night.

>>8552870
My dad physically and emotionally abused me and my siblings to the point where we all have extremely low self-esteem and doubt everything we do and struggle to have healthy normal relationships, and my mom is a weird skittish paranoid freak who's also had the influence of making me and one of my other siblings irrationally afraid of fucking everything and constantly anxious.

So yea things probably coulda been better but ya kno

>>8552870
My parents are both extremely loving a supportive and we're nothing but great when I came out. They're super Christian so they believe sex before marriage is a sin, which is my only issue with them.

>>8553151
>>8553153
that's pretty fucked up /family/, you two get help for that? you should help each other out.

>>8553165
pretty dope senpai, you married?

>>8552870
A dad would sure have been neat.
Or a mom who could be arsed to be, you know, a mom.
I guess at least she's not against me.

>>8552870
I'm fairly certain lacking a mother figure growing up had a profoundly negative effect on my development.

>>8553220
>I guess at least she's not against me.
/the good side of life/

>>8553268
why? was your dad a shithead?

>>8553331
>why? was your dad a shithead?

No, he did his best but had/has lot's of trouble expressing emotion in a healthy way.

I'm not too bitter because I know I'm rather fortunate, but I think I would have been better off with parents who didn't make me feel like they were letting me get away with something by tolerating my GNC behavior.
I would have developed a healthy sense of self-esteem much sooner, and wouldn't have experienced as much shame and denial in my teens.
I wish they could have spent time when I was still a child coming to terms with the fact that I could turn out gay or trans later in life, and been ready to guide me through those possibilities in an informed, accepting way instead of just hoping I'd be cishet and leaving me to figure everything out for myself as an adult.
Of course, I'm not sure to what extent those kinds of parenting resources were available to them. Did they know there was any better choice than to just grin and bear it? Or did they just not want to?

>>8552870
Gay
Borderline Personality Disorder
Impulsive Personality Disorder
Depersonalisation and Derealisation syndrome
Psychotic disorder
Disassociation Disorder
School drop out
Drug addict
Sex addict

They did a swell job

>>8553366
he beat you?

>>8553384
>GNC
???
Often parents don't know how to parent.

>>8553394
how many of those are you actually diagnosed with?

>>8553423
Gay

>>8553419
GNC = gender nonconforming
I see the initials used a lot here but I guess I shouldn't have assumed everyone would recognize it

>>8553423
All of them

>>8553211
>you married?
Nah. I guess they just think I'm still a virgin

My parents have always been pretty cool and laid back but we never really talked about relationship or sex stuff so I still always hid my sexuality from them (genderqueer bisexual) .
A couple of years ago I found out from a friend that my dad was disappointed I hadn't "grown up to be the lesbian I raised her to be"
I wish I'd learned this when I was 11 and not 26.

>>8553801

>my dad was disappointed I hadn't "grown up to be the lesbian I raised her to be"

lol, dafuq?

>>8553151
Why are parents so awful?

>dad buys me a computer with internet access at 9 years old
>I see shit that traumatizes me for life
>completely desentitized to everything and dead on the inside by 10
>at school I write a fucked up story full of /b/ memes
>teacher notifies my parents
> they force me to see a psychiatrist even though it was my friend's birthday and I really looked forward to it
>i don't really understand what I'm doing there or what's going to happen
>my 9 year old mind is convinced that if I act disinterested by avoiding eye contact and giving short answers they'll realize I'm bored and will let me go
>get diagnosed with aspergers and adhd instead
>suddenly everyone thinks I'm special needs and life turns to shit

Wow thanks dad lmao

>>8554034
>get diagnosed with aspergers and adhd instead
But they can't diagnose you just from one meeting?

How did the special needs label affect you?

>>8554136
It wasn't a "real" diagnosis, it was a suggested one.
The teacher that saw my story told her co-workers I was special needs, and it spread from there

dad helped suppress everything i was interested in
any expression that wasnt pure machismo would be met with beratement

i was taught to fear everybody and the outside world then chastised for spending my childhood at the computer.

The benefit of this is that I learned, maybe too late that sometimes people just chat a load of shit and really arent worth listening to!
now i do what i want and who cares what he says

>>8554136
>But they can't diagnose you just from one meeting?

Psychs often make diagnoses in minutes without any empirical evidence. Never go to a psych.

>>8552870

My dad is a diagnosed paranoid schizophrenic that my mother was virtually forced to divorce when I was 9/10 due to abuse and controlling behaviour

My mother is a nice woman but due to having to raise me and my 4 younger brothers by herself she is very controlling, possessive and is struggling to accept that I (the eldest) will be leaving home shortly

My stepdad is a pretty cool guy who doesn't afraid of anything and is pretty much the reason I grew up to be pretty much normal, at 8 I was afraid of being touched and wouldn't speak to adults, by 12 I was a happy and healthy child

Still grew up to be a fag though, not sure what my parental situation had to do with that but I have a few theories

>>8554189
>but I have a few theories
???

>>8554202

Failure to identify with a father figure, contined attachment and association with an overbearing mother, leading me to seek the male approval I never had through gay relationships, Freudian analyses basically

Although I'm not a psychologist though, so I can't say for certain, but the theories line up

I'm not really into analysing myself or anything, it's something I noticed in passing and made a bit of sense but idk really

I had a shitty enough childhood to be fucked up, but not shitty enough to have anyone sympathize with me.

>>8554222
I have the same kind of explanation for me being trans.

>>8554232

I'd be interested to hear that, I mean all 3 of my younger brothers are straight but maybe because I was more aware of what was going on I didn't develop 'properly'?

Not that I give Freud much credence but it seems most things line up for me in regards to me

>>8554228

;_;

There will be someone out there for you

I hope you find them

>>8552870
>trans
>college drop out
>neet
If I had a different father, I think I could have turned out better. Maybe I wouldn't have hated men and pushed me farther to transition :/

Dad used to hit my hand very hard (mom did this too) for going ninety degrees as a little child just because it was too effeminate for him. Growing up was nothing but insults from him. He would purposely do things that irked me like taking my picture without permission, calling me a stupid teenager in high school and forgetting to pick up one of my antibiotics after getting a tooth extraction which lead me to an agonizing c-diff infection which I was lucky to cure with antibiotics despite it being notorious for resisting antibiotics. Oh and when I was with my ex, he said these exact words to me "I see how you treat my wife, fair enough, well if you continue this, I will treat your girlfriend in the exact same way you treat my wife". He also purposely didn't give a shit about teaching me how to drive and still does to an extent today.

Mom manipulated friends and family against me. She would secretly throw away my female clothes, endlessly shame me for no longer being Christian, withhold money from me which I entrusted to her after my 12th birthday, abuse my ex because she couldn't stand seeing me love someone else, shame me for having long hair or not looking masculine enough, and the worst part was that when I confronted her on all these things, the one thing that brought her down was hearing that I am bisexual. She shrugged everything else like it was no big deal. I didn't tell her I am trans because of how bad things were already that day. The worst part is that I am the only one in her family to make a name of themselves in school and she uses me as a "trophy" against my aunt who has an autistic younger son and an older son who became buddy buddy with my mom and relayed information to her while I was younger.

I can't trust anyone in this family, but I have two younger siblings. Because I am the "trophy" I get alot of freebes relating to anything to my education. I get free housing, food, etc at the cost of my own sanity. I am totally dependent on them...

Was born out of wedlock to so very religious parents, they always blamed me for it.

Younger brother chokes on piece of plastic when he was at daycare and lives on a ventilator for 12 years, all of those 12 years my parents blamed me / think this is god's punishment.

Father is always away for bussiness needs to make money for the medical bills so see him every month or so, Mom is a doctor and quits her job to take care of my little brother so we don't get any medical bills.

I lost all contact with my parents for 12 years, they arranged rides for school, some nights I could just walk out the front door because no one would care, lead to me being raped one night.

Fast forward to when my little brother dies from eventual lung failure this was my sophmore year of highschool, "Anon we haven't talked in a long time what has changed" say I like guys also I want to be a girl, very bad reaction get kicked out for a month, tell them sob story of rape in order to get back inside, they now use the story to convince me I'm just fucked up in the head and not actually trans.

Turning point in life is me joining highschool debate and meeting really supportive people, senior year get kicked out when parents find hormones, have debate friends I can stay with for the rest of the year. Now I live alone in a podunk city with zero human interaction besides work, and don't really know how to interacte with people.

>>8554561
>and forgetting to pick up one of my antibiotics after getting a tooth extraction which lead me to an agonizing c-diff infection which I was lucky to cure with antibiotics despite it being notorious for resisting antibiotics.
Christ...

>>8552870
Tsunemori is underrated waifu.

>>8554675
Yup. He then blame the pharmacist for not telling him which caused a big fight between us. Honestly the fact that I haven't taken my life or died is a miracle.

>>8553697
are you?

>>8553801
>"grown up to be the lesbian I raised her to be"
probably a joke, senpai

>>8554637
>some nights I could just walk out the front door because no one would care, lead to me being raped one night.
What happened? Did you tell anyone?

My mom and dad were okay with gay people so I was confident it would be fine to come out, but then they both tried to get me to change my mind and acted like I was making a mistake. To this day I can sense the disappointment whenever the subject comes up.

>>8552870
Bad, to be more specific it was null. They have no control over me.

Different parents, peoples can't effect me what I think. The way that they rise you/me has a pattern.
"Don't let your child learn the truth" By 'truth' they always meant the "you can think and you can do" "you have a choice for not turning the gears of world, laws, capitalism"
But it has a punishment. In some countries you can kick your child when they become legal (18) E.g Burgerland.
In some countries you can disclaim that he/she's your child. Will no longer become your child.

Like I said punishment. Capital punishment. Less capitalist countries don't gives you (by (you), I mean the parents) the right for punishment. Don't need to give you too. Country's society punishes you. Having original ideas are the 'beasts' or their society, they says.

Original idea can be board's topic. It's mostly LGBT ideas actually.

>>8556594
Again but in English?

>>8556600
I know I'm not fluent it at.

But how the fuck you can't read it?

>>8553153
Are you me?

>>8554182
only quacks.

>>8554161
>now i do what i want and who cares what he says
you're doing the right thing senpai.

>>8554189
you were born a fag, senpai. +1 happy to you!

>>8554222
Having no father figure doesn't make you a fag, faggot. If that was true every lesbo couple's kids would be fags, which isn't the case.

>>8554228
>>8554331
kiss already

>>8556512
I went to a party when I was 14 (can drive in my state at 14), the people I was suppose to hang out with where a lesbian couple who left me alone because they wanted to fuck and one of the older kids there approached me made some jokes about how he also feels weird at parties and then gave me drinks, I got really drunk and later that night he raped me. Some people at the party knew because it happened in the house and I think he was friends with the person who threw the party. I told my parents eventually but I wish I didn't also I'm like 70% sure it he took pictures and sent them to some people in the highschool but I can never confirm.

>>8556841
>I told my parents eventually but I wish I didn't
Why?

>>8554561
>I am totally dependent on them...
Do you have any friends you can live with instead?

>>8554675
>Christ
fuck off

>>8554637
>lead to me being raped one night.
how do you cope with it?
Try to find a support group senpai.

>>8556555
atleast you got trips, so you got that going for you.
Why do you think they're dissapointed?

My parents are ok. I'm 29 living alone in another city.

My mom was more present in my life than dad but mostly because I liked to hang out with her more. Both were super helpful and supportive when I came out as MtF.

Having shitty parents would probably destroy me mentally but they prevented that I a just have:

>gender dysphoria
>maybe anxiety disorder
>maybe mild autism (but I'm pretty bad at math)

>>8556594
what are you trying to say: write that instead.

>>8556841
;_;

>>8556988
>(but I'm pretty bad at math)
You don't have to be good at math to be autistic, did you get this idea from shitty tv-shows?
+1 happy to you though.

>>8557006
>did you get this idea from shitty tv-shows?
That's why I putted maybe. I was never diagnosed with anything other than GD.

>>8556961
>>Christ
>fuck off
???

>>8557054
You know who you are.

My mom is fucking crazy and did shit like putting me in a leash and collar when I was a baby. Not only that, but my parents have always teased about putting me on hormones and shipping me to a thai country.

Honestly, they deserve the end result.

>>8556972

Well, since you asked, my parents are traditionalist baby boomers who were very into the idea of living the American Dream but were never able to (we had bought a house right before the housing market collapsed and it lost a lot of value, dad lost his manufacturing job, etc). Me coming out as gay was just one more thing gone wrong to them, as far as I can tell, and part of the reason they tried to get me to change my mind at first was because they wanted grandchildren. I'm sure my story is pretty typical though and reading threads like this makes me especially glad what happened wasn't worse.

>>8557193
is this real life or an agp story?

>>8556932
They think i'm a tranny because I was raped but I was raped because I looked like a girl.

>>8556961
>how do you cope with it?
Idk mostly spend all my time watching netflix like the cooking shows alot, I also play video games that don't really involve interaction with other people thigns like runescape thats it actually.

I don't know if I can even join a support group or if I'm comfortable enough, I buy my groceries online and have them delivered, the last time I talked to someone outside of work was when I was in highschool which was 2-3ish months ago, I'm probably going to just work on my voice save for voice therapy and then try to talk to people online or something.

>>8557286
It sounds like a fucked up fetish story but it happens to be my life. My life which was ruined by degeneracy before I even had a chance to reject it! I have all sorts of stories. Being born feminine male on this Earth makes you a target, a painted target and everyone who wants to beat the sissy or rape the sissy or abuse the sissy or taunt the sissy or yes! even dress the sissy will do what they will to the sissy until the sissy doesn't even know his own self image anymore and becomes suicidal everyday and wastes away while all the functioning adults go out/live life/establish connections.

Now my life is ruined by my kink, but I just want out in truth. There is no way out but the bullet. I hate everything this world did to me to come to this point. I could've been a scientist with a wife and three kids ha. ha ha...

>>8553896
According to the reliable source I got the info from he was 100% sincere.
I mean, on the one hand I don't care: I'm attracted to m, f, ftm, mtf and so on and I know my parents wouldn't really care who I was banging as long as they were a nice person who respected me. Now I'm in a committed relationship with a dude.
But pre-teen me could have avoided a ton of misery and self-hatred if I'd known it was an option. I didn't even know lesbians existed when I started being attracted to girls.

>>8556821

>you were born a fag

Maybe I dunno honestly, it's only because my brothers had my stepfather there for then and I was the only one who had my biological dad, yet I'm the one who's gay now

It doesn't bother me really but I'd like to know for sure.

>>8556828

Don't ship me pls

>>8556821

>you were born a fag

Maybe I dunno honestly, it's only because my brothers had my stepfather there for then and I was the only one who had my biological dad, yet I'm the one who's gay now

It doesn't bother me really but I'd like to know for sure.

>>8556828

Don't ship me pls

>>8557267
>American Dream
Work of fiction though... gays can have children y'kno senpai

>when I was in highschool which was 2-3ish months ago,
isn't it a bit early to work for someone your age?

>>8557317
>I could've been a scientist with a wife and three kids
you can still be that if you want to

>>8557317
>I have all sorts of stories.
Tell them.

>Now my life is ruined by my kink, but I just want out in truth.
You can still make something good of your life.

My mother was argumentative and extremely ungrateful.

I think my dad had an undiagnosed ASD and simply didn't know how to deal with her. I mostly remember the screaming.

Oddly, sexuality was never an issue, even though my dad came from a culturally Islamic background.

>>8556821
heck yeah <3

>>8558771
I graduated so I'm 18 idk can't really go to college so :/

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>>8552870
My dad's a good guy who worked in the military for 30+ years, very supportive of the whole family and generally a good guy to talk to.
My mother is also good person, works in HR and performs stand up comedy from time to time; albeit not my kind of humour and definitely not in places I approve of, but at least she's not dragging me along to those shows.
My older brother has done every drug imaginable but is somehow still more intelligent than most folks you'll meet and nowadays you'll find him going to AA meetings every chance he gets.
My twin brother is one of my best friends, endeavors to got to design school in Singapore, is too smart for his own good as he can get arrogant, and he is a black belt in karate.

I think I got a swell family, though my father doesn't quite approve of me wanting to join the military as an infantry officer cadet since he was air force, although he's fine with it as long as I don't die. Sexuality was never an issue, not among family or friends but my brother did buy me the cassette for 'Go West' shortly after as a joke.

Inherited my dad's autism and ended up a megalomaniac narcissist like my mom. Plus my family has a thing about ignoring anything that they don't like so my still fights with me about my pansexuality even though im fully functional self dependent adult for the past 2 years. So i guess all is good senpai.

>>8552870
My parent had anxiety so I often didn't tell them when something was wrong especially when it was something I could deal with myself because I didn't want to bother them. Sadly this continued even when I got sick. (I got chronic headaches/migraines/undiagnosed shit.)
Like a good example is that I had a UTI and I didn't know that's what it was just that it kind of hurt to pee but I waited like a full week before telling mom so I ended up needed a more severe medicine to get rid of it. I didn't learn from this later I got a yeast infection and I didn't know what it was so I assumed it would go away and we ended up having to get progressively stronger medicine for it.
This also means I waited way to long to come out as trans I knew back when I was in 8th grade and I didn't come out till I was a Freshman in college.
My parent is a lot better now but I still feel anxious trying to tell her when stuff has gone wrong.
(at certain points I was also blamed for being sick. If I didn't know how to do something and I asked for help I would then get yelled at if I messed it up and now I get chastised for not knowing things.)

>>8556961
See the thing is, I worry my siblings may suffer the same fate. They are still kindoff young, at least my sister is. I know that if I leave, my mother would go erratic and would take it out on everyone. Yet they know that if they push me, I will leave and cause shit to go down. My own grandfather confessed he is worried about me going postal. So as you can see, its a situation of mutual assured destruction. The best solution I can think off is just being honest, coming out, and manage the situation as best as I can. They aren't as strong as they were many years ago.

I wasn't really abused so much as i was neglected as far as my dad is concerned, but my mother is another story. Passive agressive and constantly needing affirmation and attention, but'll fucking scream at you if you try and tell her she did something or said something wrong. Screaming at your kids because they did something dumb isnt gonna help either side

My parents were always screaming at each other when I was really young (about 4 years old) so it leaved me stressed...
Other than that everything is good.

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>>8552870
Wow, who'd thought anyone LGBT have parent issues? The last thing I expected, to be honest.

>>8552870
I'm actually kinda mad because both my parents and school failed me in properly raising me.

Had someone in my youth properly taught me to study hard, exercise, eat healthy and enjoy the time you spend with friends, I woud have been a much better person.

Now I'm just a bitter hateful shit blaming his upbringing for his sad little life.