Did anyone here actually come out to their parents as trans in

>>8155600
I told them i was a crossdresser first when i was 17 then when i got a bf I got fed up being called gay by my brother that I just up and yelled at them saying i'm a girl and have a bf. Then we talked about it and it took a while for them to learn but they did and we sought medical treatment at around 18.

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>>8155600
I came out to my mum in person. I was round her house having dinner and talking and i started crying. she asked if the food she cooked was bad, or if i had bit my tongue, and i shook my head saying no and ran to her couch in tears. Then she kept asking what was wrong, was it something she said? was it problems at uni?. and i said something like "no its not that...its a problem with me T_T"

She asked if i had been diagnosed with something? depression? and i said "well.. depression is a co-morbidity of what i have...I have gender dysphoria" and she cried and we both cried and she kept saying "i should have known, i am a terrible mother, you weren't able to trust me T_T " i filled a bucket with tissues that night, but it was all good cause after we just talked and ate pizza cake she made :)

>>8155680
>"i should have known,
Were there clues?

>>8155726
I would say parents that accept and love their children unconditionally blame them self for not being able to do anything about it sooner. I'm not this anon but the one above and my mom basically said the same thing and feels horrible for not being able to raise me like a daughter because she didn't know until I felt comfortable to tell her. Alot of my discomfort with hiding was because i was raised in an extremely conservative catholic family but in the end unconditional love trumps previous biases and as a parent that is something you realize when raising a child. (if you are a good parent) because of this parents have to go through a peroid of mourning and their own kind of "dysphoria" dealing with a transsexual child because everything changes and the past haunts everything that loves you.

>>8155861
>for not being able to raise me like a daughter
That's always going to be a problem for people who raise their children as sons or daughters and not as individuals.

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Tried to practice some kind of speech, but wanted to be clear about me wanting to start transitioning and how that actually works so they wouldn't misunderstand.
Didn't really work out as just saying I'm transsexual made me burst out in tears every try.
Ended up writing a letter, and then very nervously walking up to mom and handing me it, the look on her face was like "oh shit, this is serious". Walked into my room and cried uncontrollably until she came in to comfort me after she had read everything.

She had basically known previously what with asking me if my misery was related to my girl self-portraits (pic related) and if that's how I actually view myself, to which I'd just reply yes.

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>>8155888
I actually think this might've been why I barely had any dysphoria experiences as a kid, since no one actively forced me to be one way and absolutely condemned me being another way.
If people had been like "you're a boy, you must be like this" I'd probably have been like "fuck off with your rules" as that's how I viewed all authority figures as a child.

>>8155888
exactly!

>>8155956
thats a cute drawing

>>8155600
You again? Still haven't managed it? The letter writing anon seemed like she had a good idea, maybe try that.

>>8155974
That's probably the best thing for protecting children from dysphoria.

>>8156027
It's so hard for me to do I just can't seem to do it. I feel like writing a letter is like a half ass way to come out but honestly maybe it's the only way for me to do it.

>>8156034
Drawback is they'll get blamed for being eternal AGP hons because they won't discover it until puberty.

>>8155680
Aww that's cuuute

>>8156046
I mean that's not really a drawback, considering the only ones who actually believe AGP is real are the 4chan hons pretending to be "trutrans" to feel better about their shitty existence. The hon part is a dice roll for the child.

>>8156300
Anyone who cares about the truth believes in AGP.

>>8156371
Ebig maymay man

>>8156455
>man
Thanks /s

>>8156046
Easy solution is top end AGP shaming.

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Part 1

>18 years old, a few months before birthday
>almost go insane for a couple of days over summer about being trans
>think about killing myself, coming out and doing everything to be trans, joining the military and accepting every suicide mission until I die with honor
>desperately don't want to be trans because I know most of my family will hate me but every time I try to second guess myself if I'm really trans or not I find I am
>looking at pictures of girls and guys together and asking myself which one I'd rather be
>it's always the girl
>end up not sleeping, not eating at all or binge eating, pacing around or laying on the floor for days thinking about nothing else
>feel like I'm going to explode
>finally accept myself as trans instead of trying to run from it like I have been for the better part of a decade

>ask to speak with mother one day when my Bill O'Reilly No.1 Fan dad is out
>ask to speak about something
>she starts talking about gossip from her work and my classwork
>keep trying to say something but can't
>getting more and more emotional, want to die and explode at the same time
>eventually say that I need to confess something to her
>can't speak about what it is for five minutes or so as I start to cry
>feels like an eternity
>she asks if I'm doing drugs, failing college, gay
>no, no, kinda--but that's not it
>eventually say that I'm trans
>she hugs me and I uncontrollably weep for 20 minutes as I sob and wine about how I'm a failure to the family and mentally ill and I'll never be a girl and I wish I could die
>she is obviously shocked and says some things like "Are you really really sure?" "You never showed any signs!" "Have you thought about this seriously?"
>but because I'm crying so much when I'm normally very emotionally reserved she still acts mostly comforting
>dad suddenly comes home and I cover my face and go to my room quickly
>don't speak for a while, mom brings me some food

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>>8157253
Part 2

>talked a bit more about that with what I wanted to do and how unsure I felt about all of it
>she schedules an appointment with a therapist to discuss gender issues
>after a couple sessions with the therapist my mom can't handle keeping such a big secret anymore and tells my dad
>have one-sided arguments for days where he yells at me about how I'm making a huge mistake that will damage my entire life
>for 4-6 hours every day he tells me all the ways in which he should have parented better so I wouldn't turn out this way like not allowing me to use the computer or forcing me to stay in sports
>ends up airing dirty laundry about every complaint he has about me like how I'm not very social and don't interact with the family as much as I should
>tells me he's failed as a parent so far but he's not going to be that way anymore
>says that if he ever sees anything girly he'll kick me out and stop helping me with college

>a couple weeks later
>transgender therapy sessions stopped
>family therapy starts where my parents hope to find someone to tell me how I'm wrong and how my dad is right
>therapist says it's normal
>we leave and never do therapy again
>dad calls the guy a liberal quack

>almost a year later today
>ordered hormones on the internet
>been taking bica and estrofem for a month
>going to stay in boymode as much as humanly possible
>never has trans stuff ever been brought up or discussed by my family since the family therapy
>mom occasionally worryingly asks if I'm depressed but always attributes it to something else like not exercising enough

>just going to stealth transition until I become independent
>trying to look for a bf into femboys but nothing so far

>>8155600
i came out to them but choked and bottled it. ended up playing a fucked up version of twenty questions. they asked if i was going to jail, gay, or had terminal cancer before they guessed i was a huge transsexual.

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>>8157265
>just going to stealth transition until I become independent

good luck, anon.
parents mean well but they are often short-sighted and ignorant.
just take care of yourself and live your life according to your own conscience.
it is your life, after all, not theirs.

work on your career so that you can support yourself.

they will probably come around eventually but it may take 20 years or so.

in the meantime give yourself the love and support that they ought to be providing.

>>8157299
>give yourself the love and support that they ought to be providing

Is there anything more crushing than having to be your own emotional support?

>>8157299
thank you friend
thank you

I'll do my best, it's hard but I don't give up because I believe in a brighter future.

>>8157265
Why do moms always fucking choose to side with a retarded violent man rather than their son.

Holy fucking whores they make me so mad.

>>8157369
Mine chose single motherhood over a retarded violent man. I'm so glad I didn't have to turn out to be one of those little psychos who takes out their helpless rage on their peers.

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>>8157318
>Is there anything more crushing than having to be your own emotional support?

Being sat on by an elephant?
Seriously, though, most gays and lesbians have to learn how to depend on themselves because they can't depend on their friends and family.
I wish it were otherwise, but if it doesn't kill us it makes us stronger.

>>8155600

I came out 15 days before my 21st birthday. I just translated Anne Vitale's Developmental Review and handed it to them while I stayed in the room. I planned on having them read my account of my life as well to contextualize the essay, but I ended up deciding that was enough. It wasn't, really.

>>8157427
I was saying that from the perspective of someone who's had to be their own emotional support for the last decade.

Not really stronger. I'm mostly just dead inside.

>>8157438
>It wasn't, really.
elaborate

>>8155888
yes that's what i told my mom to try and console her since i know it's not her fault and the values she raised me was the reason why she is a good parent.

>>8157444
How do you kill that which has no life?

>>8157659
Shitpost a worthless straight meme on 4pedos, clearly.

Tell my mother who I've always been close to and she's said said she'll support me no matter who I am
>How could you do this to me? Didn't you ever think about how this affects me? I feel horrible for never knowing, etc. etc. and she still doesn't believe me months later

Tell my step-father I've known since age 5 that I've never really been close to who is super conservative christian
>I am glad you told me, you are very brave to come out to me and I am happy that you are happy (we spend 30 minutes joking and laughing about it)

Never really know until you try. I guess one thing you can do is say you're just trying it out and it's not completely permanent, which is pretty much what I did

>>8155600
I didn't, but this seems like the correct place to post this.

My father is 67. His father died at 70.
He is extremely depressed.
I am his only son, after a daughter and several miscarriages.
I have been on hormones for several weeks now.
I will eventually have to tell him what I am doing and why, but I could not live with myself if I become the thing which killed him.
He's really very nice and a liberal too.
He doesn't deserve this.

>>8157999
I know this feel my father is 63 with a heart disease and had open heart surgery 2 years ago. Hes not a liberal and he might not even accept me but hes been a father to me my whole life. I do love him and I don't think I could live with myself if I killed him. I'm an only child too so our family will die with me.

>>8155600
screaming match about something unimportant that I don't at all remember with mom culminated in "Do you not fucking realize why I hate my body so much?", leading into an hour of mutual sobbing when she caught on to what I was implying. She decided to switch up my normie therapist with a gender guy, and we kept that hidden from pops for about 6 months

and since me and mom are so similar we can't get along at all, we had another major screaming match in which she called me a tranny, with him home, and we had to explain. He was like 500% more supportive than she was at the start, so idek why I didn't tell him until that. That was 2 years ago, and I started HRT about a year after that.

>>8157999
>>8158026
Semi related. I kinda got off the hook from having to tell my dad. I was supposed to transition a couple years before I actually did, but then my insurance croaks on me and my mom and I were kinda just lost for what I should do (we didn't know self medicating was a thing at that time). My dad gets cancer and passes away, I kind of feel guilty that he never knew who I really was but at the same time he died having his only son in his life. Not too long after my mom pushed me to go forward with my dreams, as I got insurance coverage from my dad having cancer because I was his dependent or something.

Oh and if anyone cares how I came out to mom, I'm not 'gay', but I went on a Gay chat room to just talk about it with someone and after an anon pm'ed me, he convinced me to go tell my mom. I had a really hard time getting the words out, so she told me to write it down and that's what we did. The next day we went on vacation and it was also my birthday.

>>8155600
I just told my parents we needed to talk, we sat down and I told them. Nothing overly complicated.