Gay General - Smug Doggo Edition

First for make sure to avoid everyone for the next week as they will be melodramatic as fuck over the election for no good reason.

>>7193908
Hold up. You're avoiding people who are melodramatic for no reason? And yet you come to these threads?

Wait a second. Something strange there. Not quite sure about that one. Definitely doesn't add up. I'm a little confused on the details of this.

When will he do something besides shitposting on gg?

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I love my bf!

>>7193996

I love my gaygen bf

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>>7190914
It is totally worth the read, it's about a place where randomly people are "ascended" and become immortal highly magical beings capable of doing wondrous things. Then one day there is an earthquake at the home of these people "Elantris" and they lose all their magic. They become the living dead, immortal and unable to heal. Every pain they experience never fades, so those who are picked view it as a sentence to madness and pain more then a glorious ascendance. We start out following a freshly chosen young man and shit goes absolutely bonkers.

I like her teacher a lot too although I get a vague sense of her having too thick plot armor. I really hope he manages to start shining in the next book cause for the most part he's just kinda been doing his own thing and struggling in the far background.

God bless you Trump. God fucking bless you.

>>7192906
PS4, I keep meaning to get more games on my PC, it's really just Binding of Isaac atm

>>7193996
Why do you keep posting this? Making us foreveralone perma-virgins feel bad?

Done anyone else feel kind of embarassed about jerking themselves off while being fucked?
like, idk.
i feel like i should be able to cum handsfree, but i just cant :^(

>>7194107

isnt that a bit YA-y?

>>7194207
Why feel embarrassed, you're just pleasing yourself m8

>>7194205
>just Binding of Isaac
solid choice tho

>>7194207
Elantris? No not really. He's written two young adult series one called Alcatraz and another I think called SteelHeart not bad not my cup of tea either though. These are just fantasy and way of kings is epic fantasy.

>>7194226
My bf likes to fuck me when I play boi cause he takes pleasure in me fucking up.

>>7194229
Just play dota 2 then, he'll be cumming in no time.

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>>7194207
>>7194226
Check out my 1001%. Am I a cool dude yet?

>>7194249
With how much time you spend playing games, it would be cooler if you weren't an autistic completionist.

>>7194261
And how would you know how much time I spend playing games. Not one of those *obsessive* types are you? You know, those ones that don't understand social appropriateness. That would be terrible.

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>>7194249

>>7194287
Even newfags are aware of how much time you spend playing and shitposting, don't bother.

>>7194304
Being unable to distinguish different perspectives from your own is another symptom of a particular developmental disorder.

>>7194300
Enter the Gungeon is also pretty good.

>tfw no bf

>>7194323
Completely unrelated but at least you're trying, now if only you would try elsewhere in your life.

>>7194370
If you say so.

>>7193996

I'd love to have a bf.

>>7194205

I had it on PS3, then PS4, and now PC. I played a lot of The Binding of Isaac, and there still items I haven't gotten. I think I only have three challenges left. My favorite is Computer Savvy.

>>7194249

There's even more past Mega Satan?

>>7194444
To get 1001% you need to unlock all the items. So you have to beat all the major bosses with The Lost.

>>7194444
>>7194457
boss rush and hush with everyone as well

>>7194457
>>7194479

Oh. I don't think I've completed any game to 100% since Spyro 3.

>>7194496
Games are dumb anyway.

>sign into facebook
>everyone is throwing a fit, regardless of what their views
Living for the drama rn

>>7194457
Jesus. I'm so bad at that game. It's fun though.

>>7193959
and this, hunties, is how you kill your own joke WHILE making it.
clack!

>>7194228
fantasy can be YA

>>7194738
Let's hear your ribtickler then, 'huntie'. It's so easy to judge.

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>>7194554

Amen this shit is hilarious.

>>7194777
my joke was specifically unfunny to further highlight your lack of humor, henny

>>7194802
Whatever dude. My cat thinks I'm funny.

>>7194814
thats sad sis

>>7194797
There's just so much to laugh about, everyone is making a fool of themselves online over this election. Best part is, if you tell everyone to just chill the fuck out, now they're all mad at you for not being as mad as them. Amazing desu
It's all been such a phenomenal ride. Can't wait for it to start up again in another 3 years.

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I AM SOVEREIGN REGENT OF THIS EMPIRE.
LETO II WILL NEVER REPLACE ME.

I'LL DRINK YOUR BLOOD.

>>7194554
It's pretty great.
Honestly they've built him into a monster in thier heads. Gay friends are sure he's going to send them off to concentration camps. Women are convinced he's going to take away thier right to vote and make forced marriage the norm.

>>7195115
Canadian friends on facebook are literally posting giant rants about bigotry and how it's wrong all because he was elected. Panic for no reason.

>>7194845
They next one won't be as good. Trump will be the incumbent and unless he fucks up really really hard will have it in the bag from the outset.

What's with the sudden influx of cishets into this board?
Their (and let's be honest also our) beloved candidate won, shouldn't they go out and celebrate with their cishet friends in some cishet bar while chatting with cishet girls talking about cishet issues?

>>7195139
I think it'll be great. People are already rumoring Warren, Trump, Clinton, and a bunch of (new) other women. Oh and a whole bunch of pissed off "socialists" mad the dnc fucked over their guy and will now thoroughly push Warren (supposedly).
Might not be as clearly divided though.

>>7195148
Stop posting sis, seek help you're delusional.

>>7195128
It's absurd. They aren't even considering political issues. They've just divided that voting for trump means you hate women, and minorities and gays.

I'm really hoping this means a shift away from excessive political correctness.

you guys really weren't kidding about grindr
>>7194554
i haven't slept in 30 hours. i'm running on pure smug.

>>7195164
I'm really hoping that third parties continue to grow.
Might see an end to the two party shit show in another few decades.

>>7195165
I mean ultimately, I wished instead this would mean people stopped buying into the MSM, and actually thoroughly educated themselves (which would also lead to less political correctness AND less offensive behavior). Won't happen unfortunately. Still a distant dream where people are able to think for themselves rather than tuning into a show/radio/news site/youtube channel and going "yeah [x] candidate wants to throw us all into gas chambers or kill all [x] group".
Like for fucks sake I don't even like Trump, but damn has everyone gone mad.

>>7195179
If Republicans can steal enough votes using electronic voting machines to win an election when nobody went out and voted for them, against a Democrat party with all of his huge number of voters, why would a third party ever stand a chance? Can you imagine Bernie Sanders calling for an armed revolution once his votes got stolen? Because I don't think he would, I think he would bend over and put his own mouth to his own ass and eat a shit sandwich.

>>7195190
I know that politics has always been divisive, bit it's getting to absurd levels.
>Anyone who disagrees with me is Hitler!
>>7195192
>If Republicans can steal enough votes using electronic voting machines
Can't tell if this is bait or if you're legitimately retarded.

>>7195179
this election basically killed both establishment parties in their current form. 3rd parties could stand to do very well if they put more focus on building their base in municipalities and gaining a strong foothold in small politics. the problem is that the disenfranchised will flock to charlatans like bernie even though he sold them out

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I am LITERALLY SHAKING!!!!!! Are you too??

>>7195192
Sanders is on his death bed now m8, no point. The likes of Warren on the other hand...

>>7195179
They had a pretty good turnout. What's even more interesting is the general trend that third parties have more favorable views the further away the election is. The closer it is, the more people are likely to be persuaded by "vote X and not third party or else we're doomed" rhetoric. I wonder if there's a way to combat this on a grand scale.

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>mfw was supporting Trump for a year and a half
>mfw no one took me seriously
>mfw nominee believed this would happen
>mfw it happened

>>7195209
Yeah, because the super rich would never steal any votes using computers that are not being safeguarded or watched and recorded in any way. Children on 4chan brag all day about DDoS'ing little girls blogs and making them kill themselves and praising Jesus, but the super rich would never use information technology to get what they want.

I don't know how many decades it would take of Republicans winning every single election, as their candidates get less and less qualified, and less and less people in the U.S. wanted them, before an armed revolution happens, but I have a feeling I'm about to find out.

>>7195243
The victory of evil should not make anyone smile.

>>7195217
I'm really hoping for it. Both parties have been pushing"reform" canidates, like Obama, only for nothing to change.
I'm hoping people wise up and start picking new options instead.

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DADDY <3

>>7195164
horror pls I can tell it was you.
Also you suck.

>>7195219
Fuck "queer" kids.
lgbt kids have my support, bored entitled cishets can kill themselves for all I care

>>7195254
Evil is just a point of view :D

>>7195222
I feel bad, but I fell for it too. I voted Trump, when I'm really a libertarian. Cause I didn't want "waste" my vote.

>>7195261
Emily looks more fun tho gotta admit

>>7195254
Lgbt is evil to traditional and conservative regimes allah the middle east and parts of asia.

>>7195267
>horror
>ever posting without his nametag
gurl

>>7195271
Yep, it's something a lot of people fall for and I can't really blame them entirely. They're being shouted at by both huge parties going "vote for us or you're letting the enemy kill us". It's used because it's effective. I think it's the most common statement made in the past ~3 months.

>>7195246
So it looks like you actually are retarded.
> Pre election polls poor canidates at 49 to 49
> Election is 48 to 47.
>OMG voter fraud guys! It's not possible! My feelings tell me it's not possible!

>>7195283
I know how horror types and you're horror in disguise.
Also you're being stalked by a creep so that's why you're not namefagging like the little cunt you are.
Coward.

>>7195299
I've been called horror, maki, hitler, and feelgood. I've never posted with a name or trip tho desu
Posted my image once, no one noticed though so I'm alright.

>>7195309
Literally only horror uses sis in a sentence.
Ergo you're horror.
Ergo you're worthless trash.
QED

>>7195314
2bh I mean I did catch it from horror
Does it bother you that you don't know everyone around here? I'm curious sis

>>7195246
>lib /pol/ with more words
Regardless of politics, you manchildren need to grow the fuck up.

>>7195322
>2bh I mean I did catch it from horror
You probably caught aids from him too.
He shouldn't have cheated on his boyfriend with some gross 40 year old.

>>7195343
I don't know his story, he's just a funnyposter to me.

>>7195351
Well he cheated on his bf and now he has aids.
But he's trying to keep that a secret so don't mention it.

Hey fags, /pol/ here

Make yourself great again

>>7195654
I'm surprised that you would encourage me to kill your kind. Thanks, straighanon.

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>>7195654
Know what the best orgasm is?

Anal and seeing the DNC meltdown

>>7195654
I've been trying all week but a bunch of filthy positive "love others" posters have been opposing me.

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>>7195654
>again
Bitch, I never stopped being great. I just keep getting better!

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Walk in room

See this

Wut do

>>7195785
well admittedly i prefer my guys more tiny dicked...but i think i could go proper bitch bottom for something that girthy.

>>7195785
advise him to see a medical expert

>>7195785
is that one of those injected dicks

Living with pretty much anybody is hell.

>>7195939
Living is hell*

>>7195950
I actually love living, just not with others.

>>7195959
You disgust me. Get outta here.

>>7195967
Yeah that's basically what I always say to people I have to live with. You get me.

>>7195785
Do a 360 and leave the room.

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MAGA

>>7196022
I wonder what that kid who fucked himself with a plunger thinks about all this.

>>7196022
Any more pics of hot guys in MAGA hats?
Getting fucked by an arrogant but hot trump supporter is probably going to become a new fetish

>>7195785
Laugh. A lot.

>>7194514

D:

>>7195785
tell him to take the bowling ball out of his pants and that it's okay to like bowling

then we go bowling together

>>7196353

Cousin, let's go bowling!

>>7196240
:D

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What's everyone's opinion on having sex with someone for the first time? Is it exciting and hot, or awkward and clunky?

>>7196374
fucking hate that game mechanic

people are calling me irl enough as it is, then i have to deal with that same shit when I'm trying to relax by playing a game?

no cousin go fuck yourself. if I wanted to go bowling i would go bowling irl

>>7196399
>exciting and hot, or awkward and clunky
Yes.

>>7196399

depends on who you're with.
my first time was incredibly exciting.
but there was blood.
and i'm a gay man, so...
prepare your anus.

>>7195267
that wasnt me lol

>>7195283
i also use the name not horror

>>7195299
since when

>>7195361
>horror had a bf

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>>7194514
Games are fun though, they're a distraction from the shit-show the world currently is
>what I wouldn't give for a little gamer twink to cuddle and vidya with

>>7196524
I fucking knew it was you you little shit.

>>7196535
anyone can use this name

>>7196504
I'm not a virgin, I meant having sex with a new person for the first time.

>>7193903
Will there be a civil war in the gay community?
Masc tops voted Trump, and fem bottoms voted Clinton.

>>7196559
>mascfags will do neanderthal warfare
>femboys will do chemical warfare
>mascfags will be reduced to sniveling trannies due to titty skittles in drinking water
>femboys win

>>7196628
> Fembois attempt chemical warfare
> No body is strong enough to move the chemical vats
> No one has any experience operating forklifts
>Nobody wore a gas mask, cause they interfere with hair and makeup
Rip

>>7196662
>chemical warfare
>titty skittles in drinking water
pay attention, anon

just fuck those bottoms in the ass until they behave

problem solved

Do people even know how to hold conversations anymore? It's as if the only thing people can do on dates is ask questions and talk about themselves or rant about politics. That the only interaction people have with others is with those they agree with on most topics anyways and aren't growing any valuable conversation skills, just mindless in-jokes and agreements.

Also, gas all vers bots, they're bottoms thoroughly but just like to claim they're vers for street cred.

>>7196673
>Fems think there smart enough for chemical warfare
I'm implying you're too weak to even transport the chemicals necessary to a water treatment plant.

>>7196736
Lol. We could just going to crush the pills and put them in their protein shakes. Also, the pills are small and light. No need for trucks.

Gaygen. I need advice. I'm with my first boyfriend. I used to be the top but one day he decided he wanted to be dom top and thats kinda the way it stayed. We've done it 3 times,and thats only because hes only JUST given up on subtle hinting and now just tells me when he wants to fucc.

Here's the issue though. Idk if it gets easier. Every time so far, starting from when he starts using lube and a finger, it stings, and then it stings a lot more when every time he puts it in, if he pulls out and goes back in it stings again, but subsides after a minute or so of slow fuggin

Like does it get easier? I dont wanna be a bitch about it because when it feels good it feels really fucking good but that first bit of pain really ruins the experience

>>7196781
It should not ever sting. Stinging is probably a sign of something else, such as not enough lube, or possibly health issues like rips in your anus, hemorrhoids.

It should at the absolute most, hurt when he is inside you and hits a certain... barrier. But that's about it, not stinging upon fingering or entering.

>>7196736
Im on hrt. I can lift 5kg without huge distress i think. 4mg of Estrogen is standard daily dose. 5kg is 5000000mg. Divided by 4 thats 1250000 people we can medicate in ONE 5kg batch. With even only 300 femfags doing rotating shifts, we can do one 5kg haul per year EACH and medicate 1.25 MILLION of you fags for an entire year, long enough to cause muscle atrophy, tits, emotional changes, thinner, weaker and more sensitive skin, and so on.

>>7196844
>I can lift 5kg without huge distress i think.
this is cute and embarrassing at the same time

>>7196844
That's assuming all the doses are taken directly. If you're adding it to a water supply you'll need much much more.
Wont effect anyone who doesn't drink tap water or filters it either.

>>7196873
It is pretty cute.
>Tfw no weak femboi bf

>>7196873
I dont know how much weights are to how they feel aha. I looked it up. The boxes i sometimes carry at work are 8kg and i can kinda comfortably hold them for a while, so that proves my point further i guess .-.
>>7196882
Well yeah but i used low examples. Only 300 femboys doing only one 5kg haul a year each?

What if we did several hauls each, say like 50kg each over the course of the year, that'd be stupidly easy, and would magnify whay i said by 10. Then theres the fact that we could probably gather much more than 300 people...

>>7196924
The logistics are utterly impossible.

Estrogen has rotted your brain my friend.

>>7196939
Im mostly memeing, i dont actually care about our mascfriends. Some of you are hot. And why on earth would i want to introduce more trannies? We have enough

>>7196948
Please seek mental help and possibly an education of sorts.

>>7196948
>Im mostly memeing
this should've been the trump campaing's motto

>>7196966
kek

>>7196961
Why tho. What i said was a joke, im fairly non retarded.

Fairly.

>>7196989
I mean, why not tho

>>7197004
Because im in education, employment, and have previously been through the mental healthcare system :~) thx for your concern

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My str8 friend asked me to explain the appeal of eating ass, and I couldnt figure out how to without seeming like a freak.

How do i explain this?

>>7197071
Idk.
What do you like about eating ass?

>>7197092

um
i like butts
i like feeling dominated
i like... idk. i like the way it feels, i cant explain why.

>>7197071

1. butts are hot and it's nice to make out with hot things (same reason I imagine straight dudes like sucking on girltiddies)

2. it makes the guy feel good

3. it gets him ready & eager to take your dick

>>7197071
he's never wanted to do anal with a girl or eat a girl's ass?
he might be a bottom

>>7197099
That sounds like a good enough explanation to me.

Plenty of straight guys like eating ass.

>>7197071

you like the idea of putting your mouth where another person frequently shits from, the thought of lingering bacteria and waste touching your tongue and going down your throat excites you, embrace it

>>7197071
For the same reason that anyone sees the appeal in any sexual act that isn't procreation in the missionary position.

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WTF!

Now will fags shut the fuck up please

You can vote you can marry and now we have protected you from muslims and spics WHO HATE YOU

Just shut the fuck up at the least if you can't say thanks straights for saving me every day

>>7197296

haha what the fuck are you even trying to say

>>7197296
kindly fuck off and go take care of your wife's son :-)

>>7197296

Straights need to be genocided desu

how do you know you're gay?

>>7197398

do you wanna sex up a dude and not girls

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Ummmmmmmmmm helllooooo??? LBTQ genocide WHEN?

>>7197445
only feminine guys and specific looking girls...
usually lanky awkward looking girls with big noses.

>>7197531
okay then youre bisexual because youre attracted to people with penises as well as people with vaginas
its not very hard nor does it really matter. just fuck whatever you want

>>7197531
I remember being this way, I repressed it for a long time and missed out on all the sexy high school fag shenanigans.

>>7197446

>T

gay ftms are bros tho

>>7197531

biscum

>>7197565
>gay ftms
I didn't know they existed sorry

>>7197558
>>7197563
>>7197565
can I still hang with you guys? could teach me how to pick up some big dick cuties

>>7197579

step 1: create a grindr with the name "XXX LOOKIN [eyes emoji] 4 HUNG [eggplant emoji eggplant emoji eggplant emoji]"

step 2: receive penis

>>7197579
yes, this thread is for men who like other men
just know that bisexuals can get shit for being "breeders" but really no one gives a shit since were all whores anyways

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>>7197590

>>7194738
Yes but as I said he wrote two young adult series already that were fantasy young adult.

I don't think reading about how a person slowly loses their mind due to unending pain and suffering while being subjected to inhuman conditions is a good subject for a young adult series.

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>mfw gaygen on suicide watch after trump won

A guy who says he's interested but tries to find other guys to sext is... not interested?

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>>7197648
We couldn't have wished for a better president than Daddy, what are you on about?

>naturally pink asshole

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>>7197670

I know, I just wanted to trigger the libtards that post here.

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>>7197682
fair enough

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Do you guys do any exercises before bed? I'm just talking about sit ups/push ups/etc. How much do you find it helpful? I wanna be top-tier otter mode.

His first 100 days sound pretty nice. Excepting the whole pacific pipeline thing it seems alright.

>>7197735
It's not worth it unless you're also doing warm up and wind down + stretch (most people skip them that late)
otherwise you just end up sore & not at all as aesthetic as you hope.

>>7197648
>gg is exclusively american nonwhite gay twinks
ok

>tfw you will never get to be part of royal family and call blacks primitive

So, there are approximately a couple million Mexican husbandos up for grab. Get em' before they're gone!

>tfw i can enslave a qt 3.14 spic twink b/c dat green card

>>7197735
Naw. Kinda counter intuitive to get the blood pumping before bed.

Exercises when you first get out of bed is good though.

>>7197874
2bh im going to shop in the states next week might as well pick up some masc foreigners and grant them protection in canada granted they gangbang me weekly

>>7197365
this
i'm tired of walking up to a qt bear and realizing he's straight
like god damn

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>send pic to the hot guy on grindr
>he replies
GUYS HELP I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING

>>7197877
>counter intuitive

sex gets the blood pumping before bed and makes me sleepy

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>>7197988
Tell him he has nice letters in his name.

>>7197988
Depends on what he said

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>>7198065
>he just called beautiful

WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING MY BRAIN IS MELTING. I THINK IM GONNA HAVE A HEARTATTACK

>>7198101
Tell him you want him to stick his peen in your ween

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>>7197988
make conversation.
are you retarded?

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>>7198125
yes.
i'm an autistic virgin who's never recieved a compliment before. this whole thing is really weird

>>7198142

tell him come over you like make sexy time

>>7197735
It's helpful in that it passes the time and makes you sleep better.

>>7198142
>>7198159
Do this, Anon. Make your dreams come true

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>>7198163
>he gave me his phone number

>>7198278

text him a pic of your butthole desu

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>>7198282
im having a panic attack except good what the fuck is happening? is this trump's america?

>>7198323

Yes. Daddy trump will provide bfs for all!

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>>7198305
i just had a breakdown, decided to open the camera on my phone to see how ugly and disfigured my face is, and then punched myself in the head and face a bunch of times on video
my head is still ringing and i had a nosebleed

i fucking hate myself so much
please kill me

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>>7198345

Relax and take a chill pill.

>>7198323

Make sure you don't get pozzed up little gay newbie. Play safe with randoms.

>>7198305
Tired, so much shit to do so little time. I want to smoke pot and watch Dr.Strange but instead I gotta work on science.

how do i get a bf

>>7198362

Well that sucks. Science is kewl.

>my post was deleted

Wew lady those ass hurt mods

>>7198370
See >>7198332

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>>7198370

Tough question. Try gay clubs/bars. Typical normie shit or roll the dice and try gaygen.

>>7198396
I'm not 21 tho

>>7198370
Just give up.

>>7198410
I already have desu

>>7198414
Then there's no point asking is there. Now suck my cock.

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>>7198401

Try you schools lgbt group or find a lgbt center in you city.

how2stop falling in love with straight guys

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>>7198418

Could you be anymore of a creep?


GO OUTSIDE!

>>7198434
Don't autism at me you fat fuck.

>>7198442
Seek sunlight.

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>>7198442

You kiss your mother with that shut in neet mouth? Don't bother commenting back because I won't reply back.

Get bent loser. Peace out scumbags haha.

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>>7198370
It's easy! You just have to
>be naturally attractive
>have a nice voice/no gay voice
>have a likable personality
>be intelligent(not just think you are)
>not be poor or come from a poor family
>have no anxiety
>be confident
>not be depressed
>be enthusiastic about change and motivated to make it happen
>be in an accepting school or work environment
>be in an accepting country/state

If you don't meet every requirement on this list, nobody will ever truly love you and you'll live a miserable life before dying alone. Other than that, just remember to be yourself!

>>7198414
i'd pretty much given up before tonight desu. just try shit and see what works basically. the worst thing that can happen is that you get murdered and that has it's own upsides.

>>7198446
Nah, I've got my vitamin D pills, I'll be fine.

>>7198460
3/11. Gottem.

>>7198460
I have most except
>have a likable personality
>have no anxiety
>be confident
>not be depressed

>>7198460
You're list is only about 1/4 as long as it should be, but you're on the right track.

>>7198468
>the worst thing that can happen is that you get murdered
Hah! if only. You could be lured into a trap where a bunch of pretty straight boys laugh at you for being an ugly faggot, take pictures of you and humiliate you online. You could fall in love only to have that person realize you're worthless and use every secret you've shared with them to humiliate you before telling you they've been cucking you with a more attractive younger model. You could put yourself out there forever and simply watch as everyone else gets a bf while you get ignored for being pathetic and undesirable.

There are worse things than death.

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>>7198484
>all those flaws
>still thinks they're attractive or intelligent

>>7198506
Just cuck my dad

>>7198576
yes

>>7198576

bend over in front of him a lot

make sure you're wearing low-waisted jeans and a tshirt that rides up, and a jockstrap underneath, that way the strap rides up and shows whenever you bend over

you'll be fucking him in no time

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>>7198373
Science is cool but when it's science you know and have done many many times it's less easy to give a rats ass writing about it. At least my physical chemistry midterm is interesting.

>>7198576
have grindr open on your phone and drop it in front of him. when he picks it up, give him the look

>>7198640
Act normal but right at the end of an interaction just mention "Huh, your pretty cute." casually and walk away. (Probably best to wait for him to do something actually cute)

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>>7198576
>straight guy here
>I want to fuck this guy

I don't fucking have a reaction image appropriate for your fucking delusion.

>>7198647

That's autistic as fuck lmao

>psh... your pretty cute kid... *tips fedora and walks away mysteriously into the sunset with a katana sheathed on his back*

>>7198712
Nah you just got a say it with the right tonality and with the right situation. Although usually it's best to say is as a sudden revelation then something premeditated. Wait for the person to do something cute/get flustered/etc. then comment it as if suddenly noticing. End conversation quickly to force them to think about that phrase as the last part of the interaction. It's all about how you sell things.

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>>7198576
Kill yourself.

>>7198712
hey your pretty cute..

>>7198773

o-onii-chan... you're m-making me burasshu

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I FUCKING HATE YOU JOSH THOMAS
You tried to make (((open relationships))) and (((threesomes))) normal on tv. Fuck you, you ugly whore.

>>7198807
I have a one man threesome every day desu

>>7196431

Okay cousin, maybe another time.

>>7198812
You spitroast yourself? That's a talent.

>>7198460

Do you consider Neil Patrick Harris' voice to be nice and not gay?

>>7198620

Sounds cute.

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Do you guys like hummus?

I just had some now with sourdough, and it's delicious.

>>7198938
Not really.

Babaganoush is way better.

>>7198938

hummus is yummus desu

>>7198948

I've never heard of it, but it seems good.

>>7198952

What's your favorite kind?

>>7198966

hummus kind idk

I don't get anything special

>>7198981

The roasted garlic one from Sabra is my favorite so far. It's very common around here.

Hey gays I need your help
>can put relatively large things in my ass just fine
>gf can put average sized things in her ass
But
>whenever gf tries to stick anything up my ass it's painful and scary
>whenever I try to stick anything up gfs ass she has to stop me because it's painful and scary

What's the secret gays? Why can me and my gf not put big rubber dicks up each others asses.

>>7198994
Roast dese garlics.

>>7199149
Why do you want to do it anyway?
I've never even had anal sex with my 5 year bf.
Maybe it worked when I was a teenager, but to go through the effort just for anal sex isn't worth it.

>>7199149

You don't trust each other lol

Tell me I'm a good boy

>>7198919
pretty much all american accents sound gay to me

>Some female friends thinks i'm a closet gay and keep telling gay guys to go for me
How do you even get them to understand that you're not gay? The more i protest, the more they think i'm in denial. It's ruining my chances with girls and i'm sick of gay drama dudes stalking me.

I mean, i've even fucked one of them, and she still think i'm at least bi

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>>7199250

>i've even fucked one of them
almost fell for this bait lmao.

>>7199497
I'm actually serious. This probably sounds like a dumb problem, i know, but it is starting to affect me. Hell, i got this indian gay guy messaging me 24/7 even after i told him i'm just not interested, probably because the girls feed him hopes

>>7199493
Y not

>strange increase in sex drive
>it's not going away for almost a month now
>considering hooking up for the first time
>not cute though
Should I just find a fat old man to ride for an hour or two? I don't think I'd mind it too much from the physical perspective, but I heard they tend to be weird, clingy, and unstable.

>>7199525
Gays usually are.

>>7199536
Dang. Guess I might as well then.

>>7199551
You can do better, bro. I believe in you.

>>7199629
I probably can't. It's fine though, being with someone handsome would just make me feel more insecure anyway.

>>7199525
they can be clingy. Just make sure that as soon as you both cum you start getting dressed and get out of there. Never accept their offers to cuddle. It's fucking gross and embarrassing.

>>7199672
Naw, dude. See, people will hook up with just about anyone so long as it's convenient and they aren't horrifyingly, jarringly disgusting. So saying you can't possibly do better than some rando old uggo is just being crazy.

You might consider getting fit if you hate yourself that much though.

>>7199672
post pics. you probably just have low self esteem

>>7199701
>as soon as you both cum you start getting dressed and get out of there
I know I just talked about fucking a random, desperate, and ugly stranger, but that sounds kind of tawdry to me.
>>7199718
>You might consider getting fit if you hate yourself that much though.
That's a lot of work though. I'm barely willing to get out of bed in the morning.
>>7199726
Nah.

I think I'll just stick with porn after all. Thanks for the feedback.

I've come to the gay general for advice concerning an area I'm assuming someone in here can help with with. I've been getting into anal play a lot lately and know I should enema myself to keep things clean but I'm having trouble expelling all of the water and it has resulted in some rather messy experiences. Does anyone have any tips as to how to get all the water out?

>>7199805
have patience and just fucking sit on the toilet until you're empty
stop trying to shove the enema deep and expel the water even deeper, it's unnecessary and just leads to more mess

>>7199805
out your head between your knees when shitting the water out

>>7199812

It's weird because it feels like I get all the water out but then when I bottom out on the dildo I always find this pocket of water.

>stop trying to shove the enema deep and expel the water even deeper

Is it because I'm just using a shower nozzle enema system and am getting too much water up there? I've been considering switching to a manual bulb one.

>>7199824

I usually squat over a bucket because I know squatting is supposed to make it easier to expel everything.

>>7199831
you dont have to switch products, just dont shove it in so far, get enough in so the water isn't leaking out (so just the tip in other words), and then let it clean the cavity
jump around if you so desire
and then get rid of it
rinse & repeat a couple times

the culprit just sounds to be water is going in way too far

perhaps also add a wait time after the procedure before you start using the dildo

>>7199852
>the culprit just sounds to be water is going in way too far

I think that's what it is too. The only reason I was thinking about switching is because it's easier to control how much water goes in when it's been pre-measured and I think the shower nozzle attachment one shoots the water too far up.

Thank you so much for the advice.

>>7199912
That's a good point.
Anyways enjoy your bum.

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You're a cutie and someone will always love you
I hope you have a nice day today.

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>>7199930

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>>7199938
I notice and appreciate you, hissposter! and I am sure many other people do too, ya cutie

hi guys! I was hoping you could help me with something
I need to know how to fall out of love with someone who does not love me
it's urgent please and thank you

>>7199966
Sniff his butt. If he wags his tail in response he's gay.

hi guys! I was hoping you could help me with something
I need to know how to fall in love with someone
it's urgent please and thank you

>>7200105
what the fuck is wrong with you?

>>7199154

Haha, what?

>>7200487
Seems like a pretty straight-forward instruction to me.

>>7200512

You want me to roast your garlic? Haha.

>>7200565
Yeah, it's fucking hilarious isn't it.

>>7200570

Yes. Hohoheehee.

>>7200598
What do Olympic sprinters eat before a race?

Nothing, they fast.

>>7200632

Ha. I thought it was a well balanced breakfast.

>>7194207

I lose any any and all coordination getting fucked. I couldn't pull myself off if I tried.

>>7200245
What is wrong with you?

>>7200828
Love is a chemical imbalance. Why would you want that?

>>7200842
We are never in perfect chemical balance though.

How do i convince my gf that i'm actually pure straight and not bi? She's bi herself and apparently she thinks everyone is bi whenever or not they know it. The more i deny it, the more closeted i appear sadly

>>7201003
That's a strange thing. My friend was bisexual (I'm gay) and he literally didn't believe I couldn't be at least a little bisexual.

>>7201033
I think that a small percentage of the population is a 9 or 0 on the kinsey scale, but only a small percentage. You're probably a little bi.

>>7201033
bisexuality is not even real so tell him to fuck off

How to cope with the fact that you are unfuckable/not sexually desirable/will die a fucking kissless/hugless virgin?

>>7201170
p sure the scale stops at either 6 or 7 so being a 9 is pretty impresssive

>>7201229
use a trip!

>>7201003
she's shit testing you bro

just grab her by the pussy whenever she tries to call you a fag

>>7201170
Please keep in mind the Kinsey scale isn't rigorously scientific and has been hotly debated. Using it to guide your personal feelings of sexuality does not make your personal feelings scientific nor probable.

>>7201234
>use a trip
>implying you have any room to talk shit about anyone here

>>7201275
Anyone can take up the wretched name if they so desire.

>>7201229
Find an escort, get on grindr/other apps and go find yourself someone just as miserable. Commonality seems to be an attraction of sorts.

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>tfw you just got done meditating for the first time in forever
Holy shit! Everything feels so good, so real, so clear! I can think of everything and feel everything! I understand now.

I have to destroy the dirty smelly lesser races and take over the world for the glory of Israel!

>>7201281
U go gurl

>>7201281
Juden RAUS!

>>7197572
gay ftms sounds kinda predatory tho...

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>go to doctor about low sex drive
>turns out i have something about 5% of men and 60% of women have called "Responsive Desire"
>its not an illness, but an alternate mode of sexual psychology some people have
>it means i dont get spontaneously turned on, only when others initiate sex with me do I get aroused
>tfw since its not an illness theres nothing they will do to change me
>tfw i will never know what its like to have random sexual urges and fufill them proactively
>tfw i will never be able to really enjoy iniating sex with people
>tfw i will never have a normal sex drive

;^;

>>7201919
Damn. At least your bf'll know you're loyal. lol

New
>>7202114
>>7202114