w-whats something that a boy can buy to use as a dildo that no

Just push and pull on your shit while you jack off

You can do it wherever you want

>>7008117
just go to a sex shop and buy a sex toy, bitch nigga coward

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>>7008117

>>7008142
enjoy your salmonella and e. coli lol

>>7008148
Use a condom you genius.
Or peel and wash it in alcohol.

>>7008142
Guts

vibrating tooth brush or vibrating razor handle with a condom.

>>7008117
just get a dildo

best advice get a vibrator, and good lube

>>7008117
a gun

I mean I made anal beads out of a newtons cradle

>>7008117
>>7008142
Pretty much any kind of veggies, they are also neat for your beginner asshole since you can carve them down to thinner forms.
They trick is to use that condom. Just use it. It makes things much cleaner, keeps the veggie edible and gives you a lifeline if you "swallow" the veggie.
If you can hide that, I highly reccomend using actual lube. Else drool on it a lot.

Be safe and just get a dildo ya dingus.

To salvage this thread, what didlo brands/dimensions/material do you reccomend to beginners?

I recently tried butt play for the first time and used a sharpie. I got poop over it. Why are butts even considered sexy.

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>>7008185
I would get a vibrating toothbrush or a razor but theyre so crazy expensive here..
>>7009303
I cant use a vibrator because my parents might find it out where I hide and id get in so much truble
>>7009345
I have vaseline,I cant buy condoms and it would be very hard to maintain a vegetable in my room without anyone finding out,or just using the ones my family has

>>7009971
You are supposed to clean your butt out before anything goes in it, then it's pretty sexy.

>>7009345
>keeps the veggie edible
Wtf...

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>>7010201

>>7010151
Buying condoms is probably the easiest option, if you can't try to get latex gloves but at this point it's just to have a taste. If you have a proper dildo you can skip condoms but most improvised dongs are messy or not smooth enough.
Vaseline sucks with condoms and doesn't work with different types of dildoes.
Honestly, if you can't sneak out a carrot once in a while, I wonder if you could even find the privacy necessary to use your improvised anal toy without your family barging in on you.
Try thinking if you really can't hide anything. Dildoes aren't that hard to hide. Can't you keep it in your bag when not in use?

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>>7010274
I do could,but my friends at college tend to open my bag to borrow stuff so I cant risk anyone finding out
what I was really looking for was something just normal that I could also use as a toy like a sharpie but thicker and with a smooth shape

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>>7008125

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>>7010284
I used to be in a very similar situation but eventually sorted it out. I'm telling you again I'm sure you can figure out something to do to hide a dildo.
Now something non-perishable you could use is big marbles. Not exatly the same as a phallus form but you'll bet nicely plugged. Other than that the first thing I put into my ass was a tube of pills for coughing. It was substancially wider than a sharpie but it had a flat top. wich was bad for insertion.
Be careful with anything hollow, you don't want to be the new jar guy.

I have to ask though, what consequences would you face if your close ones would discover this? I assume you're in a religious place and it would get you seriously shunned and maybe kicked out of the house since you're so reticent to anyone noticing.
Also maybe you didn't realise but heteros use condoms. Unless you're in deep puritan shit thoses should never be problematic.

>>7008117
just go to a sex shop, they sell dildos and worse to dozens of people every day, they dont care.

Cucumber, but get a smaller sized one if you can find it. Pop a condom on it, and there. Actually a courgette might be more suitable.

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>>7008117
MUH DICK

>>7010306
Feels good nigga

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>>7008117
Order a dragon-dildo, OP. If someone asks, tell them it's an exotic sculpture some aunt or friend brought you as a gift from japan.

The part that goes on your ear on a pair of Sunglasses
They're not the best but they can go pretty deep without ever worrying about being sucked in

>>7010502
You know, that's actually something that works.

If it's inhuman enough and brightly coloured the only people who will realise what it is, are those who KNOW what it is. A very special clientele.

>>7008117
Use a hairbrush

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>>7010318
honestly,i cant deal with it
I'm shy enough as it is,and althought I accept myself,i dont want to dissapoint my parents any further than I already have by all the personal choices I've made
my parents arent that religious and they already said to me and my brother that in case we were gay they'd be "okay" with it but everyone knows it isnt like that
I just want something that can WORK as a dildo,it doesnt have to be one
And since my parents are well known doctors where I live and i'm known as their child if i went to any pharmacy near a 20km radius they would instantly recognize me and if i bought anything suspicious i can bet they'd tell on me

>>7011051

If you go to college you could go to the wellness center there... they usually just have a basket full of free ones laying around someplace. One thing I used as a teenager is my dad smokes cigars and they sometimes come in metal tubes... you can fit change in there so it would make sense as something you could carry around with you. Otherwise a hairbrush like >>7010782
suggested... or honestly go look in the hair products aisle... some of the littler serums and stuff might have some interesting bullet-like shapes. I know I have a face wash that's in a weird tube shape for instance.

>>7011142
free condoms at the wellness center I meant...

Girl here but; I used to use ken dolls with solid hair. If that's too feminine there's also bone drinking horns (just check the tip is rounded), or a glass or metal dildo. They often look nothing like a second toy at all but cost more.

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>>7011367
not OP but what if your virgin hole is so tight that Ken's head pops off in your rectum

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>>7011051
Where do you live? Don't you have condom dispensers in the street?
Theses things are pretty much here only for people who can't buy them at a pharmacy.
Also, like I said a condom is not suspicious. Normal hetero people living sucessful lives use condoms. Even if your parents learned that (and even then, I think you're being a bit paranoiac about this) they wouldn't suspect you're gay.
The point of being sure you won't be stoned down for being gay is to see if it is worth it trying to hide a dildo. Being found out is not something that should happen, but IF it were to happen the consequences are acceptable even if very painful.
From what I can gather, you're deep in the closet and really don't want out. I'm not telling you to overcome your shyness and tell everyone. I'm telling you to overcome your paranoia as it's keeping you from doing things for yourself.
I am 100% sure you can hide something somewhere. Even if your room is barren and not messy usually, you can get crafty and hide it under the floor planks.
Also unless your family is very anti-gay they maybe won't even talk about it if they find your dildo. I know my father has stumbled upon my bullet vibe accidentally and just put it away with an awkyard look on his face. An experience a little bit out of my comfort zone but in the end nothing bad happened.
If you're so insecure about everything, I sugest you take a hold of your own life. Move out with a friend if you cannot bear the gaze of your relatives anymore. I'm pretty sure you're being paranoid about pharmacists telling your parents you buy condoms, being away from them would do you good. And if you're not being paranoid about it, being away would also do you good, because that is a serious invasion of your privacy.

>>7008117
Shampoo and deodorant bottles.

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>>7012055
I'm from brazil so we dont have anything like that here
that doesnt work at all,my family has 3 maids and they clean my room wether I want them to or not,so i cant hide anything,ive been found out with lube before and it was super awkward
it would be acceptable to come out as in I wouldnt get killed but its really not something I want to deal with right now
I'llgo to a pharmacy and see if I can find body lotions or stuff like that with bottles I can use but i really doubt ill be able to

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>>7013131
Oh you're lucky, I just remembered a super neat thing to cram up your butt.
Candles.
They're smooth, solid, long and usually have a rounded end (if not, you can always heat it to reshape it).
There we go, got it figured out.
Just don't use vaseline direclty on it since it'll make the scentless candles melt, you'll need condoms or latex glove (or pic related).
It's all I've got I think. Don't worry, you'll figure it out.

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>>7015195
(I meant pic related, bad habit of attaching random siggies)

>>7015195
would it be okay to use body lotion on them?if so then thats a pretty nice idea anon

Dude buying a sex toy is so easy, here's how I did it.
>get cash $$$$
> buy visa gift card
> get very close friend
> get them to accept your package
> get is sent to their house
> intercept package
> conceal it in something
> put it under your mattress or hollow out a big ass book with a knife and put it in that, get creative.

>if your friend doesn't want to take the package
> go to post office
> buy P.O box for like 1 month, it'll be like $20 or something
> Get it sent there
> have friend pick it up
Or > pick it up yourself (if you buy it from the right sight the package is very discreet)
> penetrate away :D

I don't know if I'm allowed to say it cuz it's technically advertising, I'm just givin advice, I got mine on adammale, but you could get it wherever

>>7015583
Depends, most grease based lubes won't do unless you use some kind of barrier.
Check if your body lotion is water based.
Worst case scenario, saliva works in great quantities.

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>>7008136
I found my brother's fleshlight. For this reason; I disagree with your advice (shudders)

>>7016431
That's so much effort, lmao.

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>>7015195
>>7015583
>mfw when I was 13
>found a condom in my dads dresser
>melted candle wax into it bit by bit every night
>made a thick dildo that wouldn't fit in my butt at all and threw it away

you could pull this off with a latex glove and it might be better?

on second thought OP I really recommend you just find an inconspicous actual body safe dildo and don't mess around with it comes to shoving things inside you

these are on Etsy

>>7017526
I've used candles a lot, he's gonna be safe with that.
As long as he doesn't get greedy since it doesn't have a flared base, but it's very long so hell have tomething to grab on.

mfw surgeon gave me a candle to start dilating with.

>>7008117
postomats exist for discreet delivery
or use any smooth object with apporopriate shape
or finger yourself (but you'd want to use latex glove or condom since finger skin is not that smooth and irritate your tender insides

>>7017605
candles snap easily risking to get stuck inside, no sane medical pro would recommend using candles

>>7018054
>candles snap easily
they're pretty sturdy, don't scare him like that

>>7008117
when I was a filthy teen I used to make use of my giant bubble wand. smooth one end, textured handle on the other

>>7010214
lol

>>7018218
>him
...

>>7018054
One did break but I could push it out just flexing whatever muscles I got there. Nontheless I can recommend candles.

>>7008117
Buy a dildo. If anyone harasses you about it, then harass their shins with a crowbar.

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>>7008117
If you have a pool get a couple of these and put all in the pool except the ones you want for yourself. Then if anyone finds it they'll just think you misplaced a pool toy.
I remember starting my teen years as a budding young homosexual, shoving anything remotely phallic in nature up my ass. When we moved to an apartment with a pool and we got some of these I immediately took one into the shower with me and it was basically my first real dildo. You can use condoms for easy cleanup but its not completely necessary if you know how to sanitize it. BTW get yourself some real nice conditioner to use as lube, I get conditioner from Costco and I use it for everything including lube, shaving, and it's intended usage.

>>7018829
>>him
>...
>w-whats something that a boy can buy to use as a dildo that no one is going to suspect its a sex toy?
>a boy

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>>7008117
You might want start with this one.

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>>7008117
step one, buy a but plug, step two pic related. find a book thick enough that no one would ever read, glue all the pages and the back cover together then cut out the center.

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>>7010151
underage b& detected.

what fucking country are you from?

all you need are zucchinis or preferably cucumbers and condoms and lube.

also, you can use a banana to give yourself a nice, full feeling, but you won't be able to use it as a dildo

>>7010318
>>7011051

you should be extra careful with anything small enough to get lost up there.

just a heads up, especially since a trip to the ER would inevitably land you in your dreaded situation

>>7008117
I use a wooden drumstick

Also everyone is reccomending really huge things

I dont get why big dicks so great
I think Im a small dick fan

>>7015195
that's a great idea! thanks anon

>>7020929
I'm not big on length, but on girth.

then again, I've only had two dicks inside me

>>7020933
so on the off chance that you are op don't do this you fucking idiot

>>7020994
why is that bad to do

is a wooden drumstick bad

>>7010151
>id get in so much trouble

I forgot that there are people in the world who are children and that there are parents that would punish their children for owning a sex toy in the current year.

Kind of a mind fuck.

Pool toys, I used to work at a brick and mortar pool store, and some kid came here and bought a toy rubber torpedo, he later said to his friends in the store that he was gonna use it as a dildo. I had to wash my hands afterword. If it works for him it'll work for you.
Or just get a dildo and not be a pussy.

Ok. I got you. Some good replies here and all but I'm about to make your day.

Ok. You have some options. Candles have been mentioned and that is pretty acceptable. Alls been said on that you need to know.

Other options:
Zucchini, Cucumber, Large carrots, other phallic vegetables

If your tight you can use the thing that holds toilet paper to the wall. The removable part. Gotten me by in hotels when family was there.

Flashlights. I got fucked by every flashlight in my parents house. Seriously. Flashlights can be amazing (go handle first not light side first)

Plunger handle. I know one other person for a fact who has used this one.

If you have an older flip phone for whatever reason, like an old Motorola razor, you can use that and make it vibrate with the house phone or the volume buttons on the side of you angle that shit right. (Old Verizon envy works good too..you get the type)

Any tool from your dads tool box with a round/smooth enough handle

A really, really fat sharpie. Like the super big ones.

Shit there's other stuff too but I can't remember. You get the gist though, get horny and look around your house. Look at porn for an hour and walk around. You will get every idea you need.

With anything that's not a dildo though, you really really should get condoms. Gas stations can have em in dispensers in the bathrooms and/or at the front. Go to any random grocery store and you should find them. Look for a family planning section. If you don't see one find the women's period supply area - it's never far from there. If you can get a condom avoid anything wooden and/or not entirely smooth.

I mean growing up I would use flashlights with a lot of spit and no condom. Rinse it in the sink and laugh later when dads using it to find something.

If you're over 18 buy a dildo. Online or in person or whatever. Seriously. No one at the sex shop cares. They see waaaay weirder shit. They won't remember you five minutes after I promise.

>>7021426
**"if you CANT get a condom avoid anything wooden or not smooth.

Though it's not like you'll die if you don't follow that - it can just hurt rather bad. Never got a splinter from a wooden handle but the fear was always there.

I mean, if you're under 18 you can always try to get really, really good with your hands too. Like sit on the floor and the hand that's going in you goes in through the front on the side under the balls. rock back and forth while you search for the prostate. That got me by for quite a while and the better you get with your hands the better you'll be with a toy of any kind.

Seriously just practice till your pounding your wrist into the carpet sluttily mumbling/screaming "oh yes daddy!!!~ unf ooohhhh~ fuck me like a school giiirrlll ~~<333"

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>buy
>Shape into dildo
>Hide

A hair brush with a nice long smooth handle.

>>7010284
Sharpie paint marker. It's like a Sharpie, but wide as all hell. Some places consider walking around with them intent to do graffiti, so it might not be the best. Also, just large gauge sharpies in general. Order a big one online and if anyone asks, you say you use it when you have to make charts for group presentations in college.

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>buy an electric toothbrush
>buy cucumber
>hollow it out partially, then fit the toothbrush inside

>>7008117
Cucumbers
Corn cobs
Bananas (you get the idea)
Hair Brushes
Tooth Brushes

Use petroleum jelly for lube.

Kathra, how are you doing

>>7028437
>Use petroleum jelly for lube.
doesn't that eat through condoms and act like a petri dish for bacteria?

cucumber or zucchinis (they're bigger) with condoms are GOAT
(and they are really healthy vegetables too)

>>7009317
>I made anal beads out of a newtons cradle
>>/diy/

>>7008117

Just order online or go to a sex shop. You think the sex shop owner isnt used to some weird as fuck customers?