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How do I stop feeling like an eldritch abomination all the time? While my body hasn't changed one bit since starting hormones (apart from gaining big puffy nips that look ridiculous on a literally flat chest) my face changed to a shape I find repulsive. I mean sure I looked pretty bad as a man too but now I look repulsive-er. I can't HONestly look at myself without feeling like vomiting but at the same time I have never been happier (in my mind). Does this sensation ever go away or am I forever trapped in this freakish weirdo hell like when Gregor Samsa woke up and realized he's a big repulsive bug and that there is no way back?
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you can't
welcome to tranny life
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>>6703189
>I have never been happier (in my mind)
This part never goes away. As an exercise, try to visualize what it would be like to stop HRT, how it'd feel to get ever more masculine, lose your hair, get a beer gut, deep voice...
>flat chest
I'm guessing you haven't been on HRT for too long. It gets better, with full effects (including fat redistribution which is subtle at first but ultimately really noticeable) after about two years.
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>>6703299
>"with HRT you will never ever lose your hair or get a beer gut!"
oh my sweet summer child
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>>6703303
If you're on hormones and still losing your hair, growing a beer gut then you need to get your levels checked (and you may have something else going on behind the hair loss).
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>>6703331
Dude, cis females can lose their hair and get beer guts, hrt is not magic.
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>>6703369
We can lose our hair from environmental factors, nutrition, etc. but not from DHT, which is the predominant cause of balding and causes male-specific patterns of hair loss.
Fat distributes differently on E; you can still get fat, but whereas on T it goes manly to the belly on E it goes to hips, thighs, butt, breasts, etc. as well.
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>>6703303
You are fucking retarded m8
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>>6703189
>Eldritch Abomination
Well, Op, you could must learn how to speak the many names, and the many spells of Yog-Sothoth, for he is the key, the gate, and it's guardian all in one ( read: Everything is Yog, so you summon part of Yog, you summon almost anything), but beware, your sanity will crumble if you posses knowledge older than the stars.
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>>6703883
>your sanity will crumble
>implying any of us have a shred of sanity left
Hahahahaha (kill me)
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>>6703189
What is your age and dose, an how long have you been at that level?
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>>6704077
25
5 mg/day estradiol sublingually
180 pg/mL. Idk, it varies. Three months ago it was around 730. Usually it's between 140-200.
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>>6704099
The next year or two will be a diminishing hell. Things will improve.
Endure.
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