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Shout out to everyone who suppressed because they weren't

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Shout out to everyone who suppressed because they weren't popular enough in school to dress/act how they wanted who got to watch other kids living their dream every single day who only could because they were popular.
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I forgot about that rhyme.

>tfw iktftb

Shitty conservative parents are shitty.
This isn't about parents though, it's about overly popular shits flaunting themselves every day, assuming an identity that if you dared to express you would be laughed at. Story time?

>10th grade (2006)
>kid moves from LA to the Midwest
>first day, instantly popular.
>is wearing black skinny jeans and a tight white low cut shirt, long hair wrapped in a pastel floral print bandana.
>Has chunky bangles and earnings that hang.
>light makeup, lip gloss, and wearing skull print flats with blue and black striped socks.
>sits with the popular/cheerleader girls at lunch, is loud as fuck and overall obnoxious
>within a week is on the cheerleading squad
>walks with other girls in cheerleading outfits through the halls, does random dances and quotes random pop songs throughout the day.
>have math with them, 2 other cheerleaders in class.
>get called to the front to solve some problems
>get stuck on one, hearing them talking about something in the back really loud and obnoxious
>"please be quiet for like 5 minutes"
>entire class looks at me like I just assaulted him
>roll my eyes and get back to work
>whispers start among cheerleaders
>"omg I can't believe he just said that what an asshole" "omg he needs to be nicer to Milly (name on the class roster was Marshall) she didn't do anything to him" "omg should we tell the counselor he is being homophobic" (before transphobic was common)
>turn around again and just glare at them

CONT >>>
>they smile at me and bar their eyelashes mockingly
>proceed to purposefully 'ugh' and resume
>out of nowhere they get up and walk to the front and start doing their cheerleading bullshit full volume behind me
>teacher is getting a kick out of it
>I look at her like 'are you going to do something about this?' and she stops laughing and tells them to get back to their seats
>still talking, even louder now
>finish my problem and sit down 1 row forward from them
>pieces of paper and eraser bits rain down on me for the rest of class from at least 4 people
>get up and walk out of class, math teacher tries to stop me but I just keep walking, she's following me down the hall;
>'they were just joking with you'
>'you need to lighten up a bit'
>'everyone else thinks they are really cool you should try to be friends'
>'you need to come back to class now'
>'if you don't come back I'm giving you an F for the day'
>keep walking, she stops following me
>walk to front door of school and walk outside and just sit in the atrium.
>principal walks out and sits next to me and asks me what happened.

i think you have autism :/
I like the story, could be part of a movie
>tell him about them
>"well they are just expressing themselves, you can't fault them for that"
>"but I can be faulted for expressing myself when I'm trying to do schoolwork and they are interrupting?"
>"it's not what you say it's how you say it"
>"so if I say everything with a lisp and follow it with the word 'totally', 'like', or 'whatever' apparently I can say or do whatever I want right?"
>"let's go inside to my office, we need to talk"
>calls counsellor to office on radio immediately to talk to me
>sits me down with counsellor and tells me about how homophobia is wrong and how LGBTQ*<*<£#¥+ people don't deserve to be made fun of because of their status
>pulls out a 'student pledge' and makes me sign it
>asks me if there is anything bothering me about the entire situation
>"what if I came to school tomorrow dressed like them, talking like them, and acting like them?"
>"you can't just copy them to be popular"
>"but what if I wasn't copying them, what if I happen to have the self control to not act like that even if I genuinely want to because I know better. What if the reason I hate them is because I have to watch them living my dream every day and being an obnoxious shit about it"
>principal is in way over his shit and stammers out a few words about individuality
>"no because you are only copying them"
>legitimately heart broken and crushed right now

>run out of office, group of students standing by the shaded window listening in, they heard everything.
>leave school for the day
>3 voicemails when I get home on answering machine
>all from the school
>1 from principal about how I am suspended for 3 days for leaving school
>1 from counsellor asking my mom to call her back about me
>1 from my grade level principal about getting me tested for drugs
>delete them all
>tell mom we need to go to the mall so I can buy new clothes
>ok do this list of chores and we can go
>do chores, we go to the mall
>buy a bunch of new clothes from H&M
>we get home and my mom is looking through what I bought
>"some of these clothes look a little girly, do you want to return them?"
>2 new messages on answering machine
>"...so what happened at school today?"
>explain everything
>she knew they bothered me but didn't know why
>isn't mad, just confused
>"but if you felt this way why didn't you just do it?"
>"because I didn't want to be an obnoxious shit about it and I have self control"
>"well I support you, you are going to school tomorrow and you are going to start over with them and everyone else"
>the next day

CONT >>>
SIDE NOTE; up until this point I shopped maybe 2x a year and only at bargain bin places because we were pretty broke. At the point this happened my mom had just started a new job and had some extra cash.

>car ride on the way to school
>"don't worry if they don't like it just be yourself they'll get bored and move on within a week okay?"
>severely regretting my pride at this moment
>walk in with mom
>already kids are stopping to look
>walk to principal's office
>"my son wants to come back to school, today. He won't cause any problems I promise."
>principal looks at me, sighs and pulls out a new student pledge and fills it out
>'I will not use violence or words to retailiate to the actions of others. If I am harassed I will report to a teacher and let them handle it.' Etc etc
>roll my eyes and sign.
>points to door
>"mom why don't you give us a few minutes"
>she leaves, he looks me up and down
>"are you sure you are doing this for the right reasons?"
>nod yes
>"if you are doing this to prove a point or to make fun of them you understand we cannot tolerate that"
>sighs and points for me to open the door
>"okay, you guys are good to go"
>shitty smile
>mom hugs me inside office and walks out first
>principal walks out and tells me to get going
>look outside his door, hallway is full.
>"you wanted to do this, now do it."
>opens door, I'm just standing there, frozen.
>"you can do this, just be yourself"
>take one step, walk out the door and to my first class.

i wanna hear the rest of the story.
>coming out in high school
>boohoo high school is shitty
Everyone knows that. Normal adults forget about high school when they graduate.
>walk up to door, look at my reflection in doorknob and turn it, slowly.
>walk in and get my notebook out
>start taking notes
>teacher stops talking mid sentence and I look up, begging for her not to be looking at me
>looking right at me
>other eyes follow
>soon entire class is staring, silent.
>clear my throat and ask about what is on the board
>teacher realizes entire class is staring at me and answers my question and resumes lecture
>half of class is still looking back at me intermittently
>"OK class time to do some questions out of your books, femmeanon if you could meet me out in the hall"
>dead silent
>walk into hall, wait for a few minutes and she comes out
>"I heard about yesterday, is everything okay?"
>"If everyone can just go about their day and not draw a ridiculous amount of attention to me then yes, everything will be just fine."
>"I didnt mean to earlier, it just surprised me"
>walk back into class and sit down
>finish my work
>Bell rings, wait for everyone else to leave and for kids for next class to start coming in, walk out to a delightfully empty hall. Rush to next class, again look at my reflection in the doorknob and turn it, not quite as slowly.

CONT >>>
>entire class is buzzing when I walk in
>as soon as they see me, dead silence
>sit down and once again begin taking notes
>"Class, I feel before we start today we need to have a talk."
>"today we need to address individuality, and how copying other students wont get you anything."
>"you see, some things work for some people"
>looks at me deadpan
>"and some things work for others"
>still deadpan
>"but we can never"
>"copy someone else and hope to get the same result, it just doesn't work like that."
>"we were all born to be ourselves, not eachother. So anytime you feel like an outcast just remember, you are the only one of 'you' that there is and you cant change yourself to fit in"
>still looking at me, basically the entire speech
>kid in front of class looks back at me and raises his hand
>"yes anon?"
>"but what if it is actually how we feel, like what if some of us want to express ourselves but don't know how without inviting criticism. Once one of us does it though maybe the rest of us will feel more comfortable."
>"great question, If you really want to be a certain way, you will not wait for others to give you permission."
>"if it means enough to you the opinions of others will be irrelevant."
>kid that asked looks back at me and nods
>not entirely sure if he was defending me or not
>raise my hand
>teacher hesitates "yes femmeanon?"
>entire class turns around seemingly all at once
>"What if some of us simply want to project a healthier and less disruptive version of what we perceive others to be doing. Like If I relate to a fellow student but feel they are misrepresenting an entire community and making us all look bad. I feel I cannot let another student put me in a box, and me being left to fear that I will be seen as merely imitating them when my motives are entirely different."
>class turns to teacher, knowing EXACTLY who I mean, eager for her response

CONT >>>
>"There is no objectively unhealthy or disruptive way to express yourself under this context, so you are merely suppressing this other person and judging them as opposed to respecting them."
>"you could even make them feel like you are hostile towards them, and cause them to feel bad about themselves."
>"I wouldn't want to do that now would I? Make someone else feel like I was being hostile or purposefully antagonizing them. I couldn't imagine what kind of soulless selfish piece of shit would purposefully hurt others just to make themselves feel better."
>class is riveted, some of Milly's friends are in this class and are presumably texting them about the entire discussion.
>"Class, I think we have talked enough today, open your book to page blah blah blah"
>class goes on, bell rings. Wait to leave class, teacher comes over.
>"You know what you are doing, don't even act like you aren't doing all this just to hurt them."
>"I am just being myself, and don't appreciate being accused, for the second time today, of just copying."
>gets up and leaves for my next class
>Milly is sitting in their seat with other cheerleaders.
>follows me to my seat with their eyes.
>class begins
>about an hour in a small crumpled piece of paper hits me on the back of the head
>open it up
>literally a picture of a figure wearing what I am wearing with a huge dick bulge and a bunch of stick figures standing around laughing
>fold drawing, put in my bag and walk out of class to office.
>Give it to principal
>"But I am the one being hostile right?"
>walk back to class
>sit down, Milly is called to the office.
>doesn't come back
>their little friends ask me what I did when I left with the drawing
>feign ignorance, say I had to go powder my nose

CONT >>>
please more senpai this is fuckin great. please no be bait and switch story
This is great, but you are kind of stuck up. I hope OP is a dynamic character.
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this is good
Did you powder your nose????
>one week goes by, Milly is gone
>Milly comes back
>quits cheerleading squad
>stops hanging out with cheerleaders
>still dressing like a girl, but sensibly, and not being obnoxious about it
>makes friends with the drama kids
>returns to being boisterous but not obnoxious
>meanwhile in light of the events of 'percieved hostility and bashing within the LGBTQ&$#^ community' an after school support meeting is held.
>Turns out a lot of kids felt like Milly was giving them a bad name
>Nobody except her friends know about the drawing so nobody is looking to me as a hero for 'slaying the beast'
>At this meeting we all discuss ways we can help each other, as well as general talk-it-out therapy.
>Milly walks in to the meeting
>all their old friends ditched them after they got suspended for the drawing, most of them found it to be bigoted and gross.
>Sits next to me, interrupts the person who was talking and grabs my hand
>looks me in the eye, tears welling up and just starts crying in my arms
>through the tears I can hear apologies and platitudes, which I accept.
>Milly is a mess, makeup smeared all over her face and on my shirt.
>"Its okay, we are all scared. Maybe of each other, maybe of ourselves, but lets not add to each others fear."

>we were never super close friends, but for the rest of our time we each had a healthy respect for another and met at the meetings. By the end of highschool we had both started hormones and blended in seamlessly with the rest of our class.
>On the last night at the 'happy graduation' lock in we reminisced about everything, all the LGBTQ*%@#$#%#! kids sitting in a circle together.
>By the end of the night we were all singing and dancing together. Myself, Milly, and 4 other students that came out within a year of me.
>Later that night after everyone had gone to sleep, myself and Milly cuddled in a corner for a bit, I think we both wanted more than that but neither had the guts to make the first move.
next pls
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The "my bully becomes my lover" trope
>go to a redneck high school out in the boonies instead of the art high school in town everyone told me I should submit my portfolio to
>obviously I don't come out in high school as a result

I remember reading Wandering Son and feeling both nostalgic and regretful and OP's story made me feel the same way.
Not our storyanon but that legit happened to me in high school
I ended up dating the girl that I was always abrasive and rude to
Its really common IRL even though. And Milly never became my lover, we just became friends. The most that happened was when we cuddled I put my head in their lap and nuzzled against their junk a bit to get comfy and they stroked my hair.

I think it was just we had a profound impact on eachother's development so couldn't help but to feel close.
>talk to friends in high school
>I would beat the shit out of someone if I found out they were a tranny
>trannies are fucking disgusting its not natural
>god didn't mean for people to change there genders
>literally most of the school says this
>have panic attacks every time I try to go to school now
>stop going
>no one cuddles me, I don't graduate, become neet
>parents hate me now

tough for you tho
Fuck, that's tough.


Why do I always find myself on the opposing side of these stories? I have nothing to fucking tell here most of the time that wouldn't make it seem like I'm purposefully antagonizing people. :\

I'll tell anyway, whatever. And I'm not entirely wrong in it.

>be 17 bi femboy
>start dating gay friend I had in middle school
>move to his school by chance
>all his friends know I'm bi because he's gay and I mostly just present as an effeminate boy who's flirty as fuck with girls
>fit into his group
>start meeting the people in it
>G was a girl who lost her dad to cancer. Bf used this to get her emotionally hooked.
>E was ugly, edgy, and depressed in the 'hahahaha look at how shit the world is hahaha' way. Bf used this to form some kind of ridiculous rapport with him where they insult each other, berate each other, hurt each other, and this turned them into 'friends' somehow.
>C was apparently insecure a few years back but 'found herself' with my bf's help. Literally the only things he taught her were how to dress in an 'indie' way and how to not be submissive to other people. She feels like she owes him, he uses her for emotional fulfillment.
>R was an effeminate, quiet boy with a weird fucking voice and probably autism or something. People ALWAYS made fun of him for his voice. I always reprimanded the shit out of them for it and tried to be friendly, but he seemed mostly frightened of interacting even though he always seemed to like being physically around me.
>realize my boyfriend has a fucking cult based around him making people have low self esteem so they cling to him


>don't do a thing about it aside from sternly stopping bullying
>bf eventually rants to me that his friends would 'crumble' without him constantly berating them and them berating each other because they'd 'have to face the real world' (?????)
>continue dating him, continue being comfy
>simultaneously start becoming closer to his friends
>go have lunch alone with G by chance one day because I offered to help her with a book study
>pretend I don't now about her dad for the conversation's sake, even though bf fucking bragged to me that it was the way he 'strung her' (he has a fucking weird way of making friends)
>she mentions him anyway trying to play it off like she doesn't care then fucking tears up
>listen to her, hug her, stay comfy for a while
>the shitty part of my brain says 'wow, J (bf) would be laughing at us if he saw us like this'
>she laughs too, conversation becomes about how he's a good friend even for that, just 'differently'
>tell her that maybe she should have friends who care about her feelings
>she seems thoughtful but just continues praising him
>i know i hit a vein. i know she'll do something.

>be me, few weeks after that
>famous game convention nearby (no, im not american lol)
>Me, J and C buy tickets for it
>i invite three other people I met in school that weren't in J's group
>he's annoyed, says i'm becoming too fucking 'talky' in school
>legitimately going autistic and muttering under his breath in front of the people he's talking about
>friends break off from us after a while because of him
>say he's an asshole
>he tells me to 'go with your friends' in the same low voice
>say i'd rather stay with my fucking boyfriend in a loud voice
>C is watching this
>everyone is watching this
>boyfriend, on the other hand, scurries to a bathroom almost immediately

>meet him in bathroom
>he's fucking crying
>ask him what's wrong
>he says he knows me and C are fucking and that bringing more people into it was just the end of the line
>i ask if he wants to break up
>he says no, pulls me into him
>'suck my dick'
>'suck my dick, prove me you love me.'
>suck his cock in the middle of a con bathroom stall
>leave bathroom
>C scurried off
>text her to find us, she eventually does
>she asks what we were doing, we joke around and act coy
>bf seems genuinely happy now
>talk turns into relationships
>C talks about how her mom cheated on her dad
>i let it slip that if a guy got cheated on, he probably deserved it for not satisfying her (i know it's a shit opinion now, back then I didn't)
>both of them are shocked, C kinda agrees
>get her to agree fully and we're full on talking about how fucking jealous some guys get
>a bit of this is sadistic revenge against boyfriend
>he goes back to his earlier autistic muttering and face
>me and C start making fun of him for it
>i've never seen C talk back to him
>he's livid, but not reacting too much
>day ends, i'm supposed to sleep over at his house (his parents didn't know we were dating, so we got to sleep in the same room)
>cuddling as usual
>he suddenly starts humping me
>'talking shit earlier like the little bitch you are, huh?'
>think we're just teasing as usual and ask what he'll do about it
>'i'll fuck your brains out' in a voice that could be heard from the other rooms
>tell him to tone it down, and also feel a little worried since we never had sex and i didn't plan on it even though we were both really curious virgins
>slaps me in a way that's not playful and says 'I'll speak as loud as I fucking want to'
>starts fucking punching me in the back, painfully, not playfully, not sexually
>ask him what's wrong with him, stop, stop, please
>we hear a door opening outside
>he tries to pull off from me
>get fucking pissed that he's doing this
>tangle my legs around him and hold him where he is
>room door opens
>immediately pretend I wasn't holding him where he was, leg grip turns into me trying to 'kick him' from below, continue asking him to stop in a crying voice
>his mom asks what the fuck is going on
>he gets off me
>he tries to say that it's not what it looks like, i'm just laying there exhausted
>she starts beating the shit out of him with a fucking figurine
>curl up on my mattress and watch
>he yells that it's not what it looks like, that she should ask me, that we were just wrestling
>she asks me what was going on
>'i-i wanna go home.'
>she calms down for the moment, bf is staring at me fiercely
>wait for a cab outside with bf and his mom
>know he'll get fucked up as soon as I go
>feel slight satisfaction
>go to school the day after and he's not there
>spend a week without him befriending his friends, R seems to be glad he's not around
>E has a crush on G
>confesses it at my suggestiono
>rejected but I help him pull through the aftermath
>C and G are around me all the time, E treats me like a bro, R and me start going to lunch together
>next monday and boyfriend is there
>acts like nothing happened
>treats me normally
>tells me we should meet for lunch, know what he means

>tell him i'm sorry for how it turned out
>he seems pretty level-headed and 'thanked' me for stopping him from doing something more, his parents believe we were just fighting
>ask him where we stand
>he says he doesn't want to date me anymore, and he doesn't want me to be friends with his friends
>start hanging out with the people I took to the con
>J's friends, over time, end up joining the group
>J ends up hanging out with a straight guy he had a crush on even while we were dating
>kiss C on a truth or dare
>start dating C
>we're cuddly and attached in school even though I was never like that to J
>bf starts trying to sabotage it, C still considers that she owes him even though they don't hang out anymore
>he guilttrips her for stealing me (????)
>rant to her about how he's a fucking sociopath
>she seems to believe it, but is confused and doesn't want to be involved in the situation anymore
>we keep dating
>we keep being publicly romantic
>bf sits through it all
>texts me asking why i'm doing this to him
>ask if he wants to get back together
>he says he does
>say that's his problem, he doesn't know what the fuck he wants, tell him he should leave me alone
>he keeps coming to school and hanging out solely with his straight crush
>eventually confesses after a few months
>straight crush ostracizes him
>sadistic, sociopathic, autistic manipulative ex is all alone
>months pass, graduation is at hand, randomly text him that I'm sorry that it didn't work out, he answers with 'what? my fucking life? not your fault'
>he's now in college getting shitfaced drunk and apparently hooking up with girls
Im going to try to write this long ass story, it will probly suck and be quite short honestly. Hopefully i can get some advice.
>in old school i was fat nerd beta kid
>made an effort not to connect with anyone. like being alone.
>also confused and trying to convince myself im not gay
>last year i started hanging out with a kid named Michael.
>Truely happy and had good times for first times in life
>holy shit friends are great
>Michal says he is going to ather school
>so is pretty much the whole group of friends
>Oh well, parents wont let me go to other school and the school i am going to is really good (charter prep)
>Start new High School
>Holy shit i have no friends
>literilly no one is a real friend with me for the first few weeks
>meet B (yes im stealing the one letter names from anon's story)
>B is ugly AF but pretty funny.
>have some good laughs.
>Me and him are both straight a+ all AP class students.
>Unspoken connection that we are kind of geniuses

Rest of story

>Continue to hang out with B
forgot to mention this so imigine this happening on like the first week
>Go to ASL class
>Sit down,i arrive to classes early so i see everyone walk in
>Completely hot kid comes in
>Boy, probs 5' 11" skinny AF and wears all black and a thick sweater in 110 degree weather
>Think, holy shit, i need to know that kid
>even now, dont want real sexual realtionshit (it would be great) Just want to be his friend
>Every day i try to get closer to him, know more about him.
>During some stupid name game find he is named owen.
>Avid skater etc, quite smart but doesnt give a shit about school
>Constintly referces that he doesnt give a fuck
>Ditches school, blows off projects, pierces his own lip with brake wire at lunch
>fucking savage
>he ends up settling with a group of friends
>G is a fucking jerk. he just tries to make everyone look bad and is completely retarded
>P is a cool guy, but quiet as fuck. Also pretty hot and friends with O (The god from a few lines above)
>O becomes best friends with G for some reason. I feel O is trying to immerse himself out of the "Emo" crew and wants to be with the "cool kids"
>G is high in cool kid hiarchy
>I try to push myself in their group mainly in ASL and kindof fail


Holy shit this is getting long i need to sleep

Meanwhile in ASL
>try to get in their group despite G's assholeness
>listen to convorsations but i have nothing to add, and when i do say something, its like they cant hear me as a whole
>Continue to hang out with B
>B starts maybe hitting on me but i dont even want to be friends with him, he is clingy and needy, and makes me look bad in my eyes
At this point i dont know what do do. Its fucking torture looking at O every day.
He is literilly the most beautifull thing i have ever seen i cant even explain
Its not like he really dislikes me, but its almost like G is compelling him to stay away from me
>G pretty much hates me
I dont know what to do. I can ignore O but cant seem to really connect with him.
Please send help
Try a different website until you turn 18
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