>listening to morning news on radio alarm clock >radio

>>35087602
you might need medication, and leave your guns with a loved one, and no your waifu is not a real person...

>>35087602
That's pretty nutty.
I have my guns Stan smithed around the house
>In kitchen pantry
>In bathroom
>In guest room
>In living room
>In bedroom
>Carry around house anyway
All hidden in a fashion where they wouldn't be readily available to a burglar but when I have kids that's going to have to change

>>35087602
Sleep with knife under pillow

>>35087905
Does your wife have her machetes ready in case she has to protect the clan?

>>35087602
Few things send chills down my spine like a suddenly quitting AM radio. Had a major blackout in my area a few years ago, and even the AM band was nothing but squeals and static. Shit is unnerving. Somehow also comfy though

>be me
>be sitting in living room
>go to my closet in my room to grab my bayonet that goes to my russian rifle
>think of what would it feel like to get stabbed by it
>think about stabbing myself but stop because I know you can never recover from stab wounds and the risk of tearing a tendon scares me so I put it up
>another time I had my revolver on me in the living room when using coconut oil to had on the ohtside frame on the gun to give it a shine look on it when I get a knock on the door
>loaded my gun and walked up to the door ready in hand
>it was just a mailman
>get my mail while I think about what would happen if I shoot him right now
>fight the urge as he leaves
>read my bills while gun in my hand

Other than that I feel pretty normal.

>>35087602
Get help. You have mental issues and should not be handling a butter knife let alone a gun. Seriously, get help.

>>35091043
SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU GODDAMN FUCKING LIBERAL!

>>35091027
You should get help as well
Damn this board is full of nutheads

>>35091774
Reading that makes me wish that I could find you and rape you ironically before tying you up and putting you in a basement so no one could find you until a plumber comes by to check on the water pipes in the basement and he rapes you as well.

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>>35087602
/k/ will make fun of me for this shit, I just know it, but holy fuck my heart was racing like a motherfucker.

>Be at home totally alone
>It's December, the week of "OMG 2012 MAYAN CALENDAR ENDS WERE ALL GONNA DIE"
>Listening to /x/-themed late night radio show (not Coast to Coast, that's on after)
>I'm not even hasguns yet (didnt happen until two months later)
>Curiously they spend a couple minutes talking about the War of the Worlds broadcast back in the day and how the FCC mandates breaks in radio programs to avoid the mass-panic that happened then
>Ok cool
>End of the show, approaching 12am, producer says he's getting a phone call
>Suddenly the radio show cuts to emergency broadcast
>BEEP. BEEP.
>I forget the exact message but it basically says there are ICBM's inbound on L.A., SanFran, NYC and the Capitol
>I shit bricks like a motherfucker because someone was pissy with the US that month.
>I start to panic thinking about how fucking unprepared I am for SHTF
>I see pic related in the /k/ thread open on my laptop and suddenly all is clear
>I start throwing shit together at 90 miles an hour
>Clothing, toiletries, etc.
>About to start gathering up my food when the broadcast cuts
>Normal news break
>Coast to Coast AM comes on air and says nothing about missiles or any attacks
>Realize I've been punk'd
>I am OK with this

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>>35087602
lame, Op doesn't have a back up radio ? hell even your smartphone is a tv/radio/computer . .

But sure you have multiple weapons,

me I got my trusty BLASH beam rifle .

>>35092090
That is some next level trolling.
Also coast to coast is comfiest radio program. There are shitloads of recordings from it on YouTube, but playing them just doesn't have that AM radio feel. Need some kind of an audio filter

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>>35091027
You can't feel it at first, then it gets cold, then the blood comes, and then it burns. Your adrenaline is going to hard to feel much.

Better hope that training kicks in cause I had to patch myself up when it happened to me.

>>35089403
Same

>>35087602
>walking out of work
>going to car
>notice some dude sitting in a beat up old van just idling there
>keep an eye on him out of the corner of my eye
>get in car and begin drive home
>notice van pulls out and follows
>mildly unnerved, think of my CCW tucked in my iwb at my 5 o'clock
>take some turns left and right, avoiding going straight to apartment
>van is still there following a bit back.
>SUPER PARANOIA engage
>decide to begin to make my way home and floor it
>lose van in the distance but headlights are still following
>whip into complex and rev it down to parking space.
>bail out and beat feet up the stairs (second floor apartment)
>lock door and kill the lights, grab my m16a4 clone and chamber a round
>peek through blinds
>van is slowly driving down apartment block
>dude is scanning buildings
>watch through blinds as he makes a circle and drives away
>sit facing the door for a few hours waiting to blow away this fuck
>finally give up and go to sleep, but slip my Makarov under my pillow

Haven't had that experience since and nothing came of it. Weird and spooky

>>35095312
That sounds like reasonable paranoia to be fair to you, he ended up at your apartment complex but took the same fucked up route you did

>>35095376
Yeah, I debated calling the cops but at the same time I doubt they'd have done shit about it. There was nothing but spooky circumstantial events. The whole experience put me on edge for a while.

>>35095390
You should have taken the plate number down and kept an eye out for it

I've done similar here and found out I was a soon to be target of a drug related revenge attack due to mistaken identity, luckily enough I accidentally bumped into the guy driving the car in the local Asda and spoke to him asking why the fuck he was following me

>>35095312
That legitimately sounds really scary

>>35092802
what did you do?

>>35095529
whew

>>35089403
My parents do that as sort of a dream catcher, it works for me too

>>35087602
You have the 'tism

Im in a village, live alone and can barely pay for electricity and have to walk into the town (i dont have a road legal car either) to get cigarettes and beer, things i cant create.
I sometimes have power cuts, live like chuck from Better call Saul, have a bunker and a tunnel network.
I scavenge a lot of things and have my ex who is a doctor come every year before christmass to examine me (she feels very sorry for me and doesnt want me dead).
I have an old phone that cant have any apps, just raw internet connection.
I have a charger at home but i have to hook it up on a car battery.
Im cool with the junk yard owners, they allow me to take things but i work off the debt.
I borrow horses to pull things, for transport, sometimes use the car if i have enough cooking oil.
I have a lot of pets.
In my free time i dress up as a king, with robes, a crown made out of aluminum foil and start ant wars, yellow ones vs the black ones, put food in the middle, they dont have any other food source, they must battle. While they battle, i with the costume, and all the fake jewelry on me, i do this hand moves, like the crazy ones in Vikings when they assemble the fleet. I also say quotes from old war movies.
I play Burning bridges tune with pots and drum sticks and sing it when i see an ant go around the main bulk of the fighting.
I gotta go

>>35087602
you belong in an institution
get help

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>>35096090
My mom was high and stabbed me with a piece of glass after I tried to stop her from using a hatchet to come through the front door (she thought we locked her out, door wasn't even locked)
>Take me to the hospital
No we don't have any gas
>Then call me an ambulance
No we don't own a phone
>Jesus fucking Christ I'm in a goddamn 3rd world country.
No one had any super glue either. I'm clamping it shut cause it's fucking super gross to look at. The glass actually ran up my hand instead of through it and you could see the tendons and muscles and fat and what not. Super gross. Anyway I go next door, ask for super glue, dump the entire bottle on my hand and slap some painters tape on it. About 2 days later the glue has finally dissolved enough to get the tape off and I just kept changing my dressings. I didn't have any betadine and started to get a bad infection in it (I think you can see the infection in the photo) so I started packing it with salt to draw it out.

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>>35096400
No don't go I want to hear more of this

>>35089403
>knife under pillow
>2017
>Not having a retention holster mounted between mattress and box spring.