So I just moved to a new apartment and I found these guys living

No, you can't train wasps. They are tiny flying balls of hate

>>34484977
Dress up as a nigger, keep attacking their nest, and they'll attack all niggers on sight.

>>34484986

Teach them what to hate.

>>34484993
Kek

File: Ant nobody got time for that.jpg (1MB, 4160x2340px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 4160x2340px

I want to witness large scale ant colony vs bee colony wars and battles. I'd make a TV show out of it.

File: 1485130975029.jpg (30KB, 336x442px) Image search: [Google]

30KB, 336x442px

>>34484993
laughed heartily anon.

>>34484977
Ok anon so here is what youve got to do to weaponize those little buggers.
1: make shift be suit my man
2: get a cup and catch those stingers at night, they'll be asleep and a little moar sluggish use a lidded cup
3: take your new flying weapons you caught with the lidded cup and throw them bitches in the freezer for like 30'ish minutes, it's gona make them go to sleep thinking it is winter.
4: get you some dental floss and tie it around their abdomen(not over wings the need to fly)
5: with your tied down weaponized flyers take the other dental floss end and tape it down. window, door frame, inside the microwave or mailbox it dont matter
presto weaponized guerrillastingers

File: image.jpg (319KB, 1771x1388px) Image search: [Google]

319KB, 1771x1388px

I've been tapping the glass and shining lights at them at night to keep them up and agitated.
I think it's working pretty good but it's mostly white folk up here so nobody tests it out for me.

>>34484993
>dress up as a nigger
>get shot by other niggers
>get shot by cops
>get shot by anyone looking at a nigger fucking with a guys window

whew, lad, you sure thought that through.

>>34485044
>Premium Gold fangs
fucking pay to win fags i swear

File: image.jpg (830KB, 3264x2448px) Image search: [Google]

830KB, 3264x2448px

>>34485013
There was a Yellowjacket nest but I threw it out the window and the other ones picked off the stragglers when they came back, so they could probably fight another species colony with that training.

This concept deserves some ancap memery

File: aria_by_pictoshaman-dbf2zxq.jpg (850KB, 846x1460px) Image search: [Google]

850KB, 846x1460px

Just invade their nest and rape all the female wasps

File: Screenshot_2017-05-04-09-54-23.png (2MB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 1920x1080px

>>34485049
Tfw great white north

Still have white niggers everywhere

File: image.jpg (622KB, 2268x1738px) Image search: [Google]

622KB, 2268x1738px

Just woke them up, anybody got any suggestions for training tonight?

>>34485179
D'awwwww

They look like baby cazadores...

Feed them radation, you know you have to.

>>34485179
>>34484977

Aight they're really basic creatures, but they're all you've got.

First you've got to get them trained. Gotta get Pavlovian with those winged fucks, they're too dumb to understand much else.

Choose a song. I'd suggest this, mostly for shits and giggles. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HK2lNuiD7gM

Play that whenever you 'train' them. Train them by doing exactly what you're doing. Piss them the fuck off while that song is playing. They will soon associate The Sacred War with a need to defend their nest and fuck up whatever is in their way until the song ends. I'd suggest releasing more animals for them to kill when the song plays. Start small. With any dedication you can have them trained to defeat enemies up to and including small children by the end of the year.

Dress up as a wasp. Try to blend in. Make them accept you as one of their own. Gain a deeper connection with your wasp-kin.

File: 1499385352273.jpg (10KB, 343x395px) Image search: [Google]

10KB, 343x395px

>>34485525
This desu

>>34485077
Yellowjackets don't need training. They're born sadistic psychopaths just looking for a reason.

>>34485179
Open the window, anon.

>>34485013
>glockshit

File: 1413508871300.gif (3MB, 400x225px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 400x225px

>>34485039
The mental image of Ron the mailman getting fucked by wasps for delivering the mail cracks me up something fierce.

File: 1498687526060.png (326KB, 500x481px) Image search: [Google]

326KB, 500x481px

>>34485525
do it and post results op

File: perfectly sane.png (143KB, 726x660px) Image search: [Google]

143KB, 726x660px

>>34484977
No joke you can desensitize them to your presence and hands if you feed them sugar water from a young age. I did it one spring/summer when I was like 16 and it's pretty cool but they don't attack on command. Its basically like "Hey we wont sting you because you feed us". Very basic domestication

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7MlDMHG0SQ

>>34485525
Make sure you stop the music when the thing is dead, so they think it works.

File: 40827050.jpg (131KB, 800x552px) Image search: [Google]

131KB, 800x552px

>>34484977
Only solution is to burn the entire house to the ground and move far away

>>34485688
underrated

>>34484977
Extract their pheromones and put in glass vials. Encourage the wasps to nest in strategic locations around your house. When the cops come for your CP, throw the vials at the cops. The wasps will swarm them while you laugh at the irony of SWAT teams getting stung by insects.

in all seriousness, i hear if you hand-feed a queen wasp, the rest of the nest ends up not hating your presence.

File: image.jpg (2MB, 3264x2448px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 3264x2448px

Okay guys I put out some sugar water, I'm gonna pick up a speaker and start training them today

File: Bee pets.png (295KB, 621x349px) Image search: [Google]

295KB, 621x349px

Dont forget to take them for walks, they love that shit.

wasps already come trained for home defense

>>34484977
>your new apartment

You sweet summerchild!

>>34485076
decent joke
I laffed

>>34484977
wasps and hornets are cunts with wings
just kill them

>>34485039
30 minutes will fucking kill them. It only takes about three to snooze them, maybe less.

.t fucks with wasps

>>34484993
Actually wasps instinctively target black things, so you're already covered there.
That's why when you fuck around with wasps, you had best be wearing white head to toe.

>wasps are evil
this more The Oatmeal-level bullshit. Everyone goes on about bees and honey, but nobody realizes wasps fulfill a predator role and help reduce bullshit bug population and help gardeners by being a natural pesticide. Furthermore, some species also feed on grapes. They leave some bacteria from their GI tract which improves the taste of the wine made from it. Wine made from clean grapes doesn't taste as good as wine made from buggy grapes.

In short, fuck The Oatmemer

>>34491583
Begone, WIDF

>>34485013

Not the same as what you're describing but still worth the watch, especially considering the staggered odds

>>34485013
>>34493619

>forgot link because daydrinking is dangerous when you're already retarded to begin with

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDSf3Kshq1M

>>34485525
antman pls go.

>>34485105
All wasps are female, the males die after mating.

>>34497289
rethink your premise

>>34485105
I wanna fuck that flying hate machine

>>34485001
they hate everything, but above all, they really hate people who try to teach them things.

>>34491579
those are African bees

>>34497289
and by die he means they are murdered

>>34484977
>So I just moved to a new apartment and I found these guys living in my window.
>see wasps
>still thinks he owns the apartment
you will be paying them rent by the end of the month

>>34484977
They will turn on you.

>>34500132

t. male wasp

>>34500140
he is right, we will.

>>34489482
>SWAT teams getting stung by insects.
i giggled