How the fuck am I supposed to build my bug out bag without coming

>>33575350
Bring your gf...

>>33575385
I don't have one

>>33575350
>I have been storing food items in the boxes that hold peoples gas meters for months like a squirrel
Excuse me what the fuck

>>33575350

... Just laugh along and make a joke about it, you autistic fuck. The most suspicious thing you can do is start getting defensive right afterwards.

Alternatively, you could just split the item buying into several trips, so that you don't look like a maniac every time you buy something.

>>33575350
>Electronic drill
But why?

>Storing shit in peoples gas boxes
But why?

>>33575350
Just say you're going camping, idiot. I mean, you probably are anyway, so it's not lying.

>>33575350
Use amazon or some other online services. Also
>>33575408
Seriously what the fuck?

>>33575350


What area do you live in? West Coast? East Coast? The South?

Should've just told him you need this stuff for whatever natural disaster can happen in your area. Last time I bought a bunch of supplies I had someone make a meme zombie joke and I just told them it was because we live on a fault line.

>>33575350
If you're wanting to build a big out whatever, you're already a lunatic and odds are you have already done something to make you look like that. Might as well just go all out now.

>>33575388
Theres your problem. Loose some fat.

>>33575350
>(I have been storing food items in the boxes that hold peoples gas meters for months like a squirrel) and a few other tools

What happens when the meters get read?

This is fascinating.

You are insane BTW

a m a z o n

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>>33575408
What the fuck

>>33575905
What's wrong with a bug out bag?

>>33575892
>ou're wanting to build a big out whatever, you're already a lunatic and odds are you have already done something to make you look like that. Might as well just go all out now.


This works out really well. I live on the gulf coast. We have a food supply in case of a hurricane

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>Electronic drill
>shtf

GO MANUAL OR GO HOME

>>33575939
I hide the food beneath leaves and move it around whenever possible to prevent discovery but I am OK with losing some food to the readers.

>>33575350
smile
"heh, yeah something lick that"
then get up real close and whisper in his ear "Come the apocalypse I'll rape you and everyone you love, you piece of shit"
exit the store laughing

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>>33575388
>>33575350
you are the creepy lunatic

Buy it in several transactions at different stores?

>>33576091
if shtf I don't have time to get to 10 different stores

>>33575350
>I have been storing food items in the boxes that hold peoples gas meters for months like a squirrel
You are already a crazy lunatic.

>>33576010
How can you even live your life if you're constantly rummaging around in your neighbors' yards?

>>33575350
>How the fuck am I supposed to build my bug out bag without coming across as a fucking creepy lunatic?
>(I have been storing food items in the boxes that hold peoples gas meters for months like a squirrel)
>(I have been storing food items in the boxes that hold peoples gas meters)
> for months
>like a squirrel
What

It's not the things you're buying. It's the fact that you're a creepy fucking lunatic.

>>33575350
I think you mistook bug out bag and survival gear. You don't need a ton of tools in a bug out bag. A bottle of water, a first-aid kit, a multi tool, a flashlight, and maybe one or two energy bars should be all you need.

>>33575350
Somebody screenshot this lunacy.

>>33575350
all of that was completely normal shit until you got to

>key for opening peoples gas meter boxes

I can hear the tinfoil from here OP. All that other shit is really common stuff. Just say it's for hiking and random work around the house. You know, they're specific purpose that you're essentially using them for.

What the fuck is your plan for stashing stuff in gas meter boxes? You realize people check those right?

>>33575350

>axe, electronic drill, hammer, and a few other tools

What do you want these things for? Just curious, it seems like it would be heavy to me.

>>33577131
Axe - self defence, making firewood, chopping the overgrowth, home security, DIY projects, chopping wood to keep fit during a SHTF situation
electronic drill - hanging my showerhead onto a tree, scaring wildlife as the drill sounds like deforestation
hammer - scaring off animals by hitting tree bark, smashing open animals I hunt (ie fish), potential suicide option

>>33577421
You sound like a grade A autistic.

What the fuck are you going to do with an electric drill once the power dies?

Get a gun and a fucking knife, axe is handy keep that but the drill and hammer are just fucking stupid.

>>33577421
If you can kill yourself with a hammer then you must be one wimpy fuck.

>>33577546
And also deforestation, really? Where the fuck do you live? Most animals live around cars and human activity and the sound of a drill will likely just make an animal curious.

>>33577556
If you can't kill yourself with a hammer then you must be one wimpy fuck

>>33575350
Jesus Christ OP just ignore them or buy online, shit if some guy laughing at you makes you sperg out this much you might as well just end it now.

>>33575350
>>bought them all today at the one store

Don't buy everyting together and you won't have to feel like a fucking sperg.

>I don't have time
Bullshit. Go to different stores on the same day then.

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>>33575350
>storing food items in gas meter boxes

Here's how I see it playing out.
>Op thinks shits about to go down
>Grabs his bag and power drill with his little key around his neck.
>Runs off into the woods.
>Sneaks up to someone's home and starts fumbling with the gas meter box
>Opens box and realises there's no food because people regularly check them.
>REEEEEEEEE.Jpg
>Home owner comes out WTFing
>OP spergs out waving his power drill wildly.
>Homeowner puts OP down with his weapon
>OP is Kill
>Keks were shares with the local PD when they respond and they in turn share this retardation on /k/

Such is life as an autist.

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>>33576269
done

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>world ends
>get shot for coming up to somebodies house to get your food back

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>>33575408
Came here to ask this

no B.O.B is good without the D.O.N.G

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>>33577680
FFS, do I have to explain everything to you people?
pic related. This is my next door neighbours gas box. I know they never check it because she has told me so herself so I hide a jar of honey in here. Honey is the best food for this, as it is right next door, so if SHTF, I have to get a quick boost of energy. Ultra sugary honey is the best option for this. I have stored things like lentils, rice and beans on the outskirts of the city as I will likely be forced to live in the surrounding countryside, which makes it a good idea to hide 'staple' foods here. I am relying on the SHTF being a climatic thing where food can't be grown easily. its not hard guys

Poor fags who don't already love in a shipping container on 10 acres of good land with a fresh water spring, solar panels and Internet. You fucking wish you could be me, just built a pull up bar the other day.

>>33577421
>hammer - scaring off animals by hitting tree bark, smashing open animals I hunt (ie fish), potential suicide option
the fucks wrong with you?

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Dude, calm down.

Yes shtf could happen at any time. Most likely, not any time soon. Putin is not gonna nuke DC for one airfield in Syria. Don't believe everything /pol/ says.

You could have just said "I have a big camping trip coming up" or "I need supplies for my cabin." Or you could have just laughed it off and said "no lol, I just like to be prepared in case there's a big storm/tornado etc..."

>how do i not be a creepy fuck?

Well if you're storing shit in other people's gas meters, like I believe you said you are(?), not much you can do about not being a creepy fuck. Because you are one.

>>33577421
Are you honestly going to carry around a drill and hammer? What a waste of energy, focus on cardio with light weight gear, used to be in the army, trust me a 20kg packs gets real tiring real fast.

>>33575350
Ask him if he's ever seen a hourly wage greater than 12.00 and walk away?

>>33576065
>you are the creepy lunatic

This

>>33577421
>chopping the overgrowth
>>33577421
>smashing open animals I hunt

>>33577421
>hammer - scaring off animals by hitting tree bark, smashing open animals I hunt (ie fish), potential suicide option

Indeed.

Tell us more

>>33577421
Use the back end of your hatchet as a hammer, and don't bother with a drill unless you are taking an entire woodworking kit. I'll see if I can't make a list for you.
>sks
>5 litres of water, prefferable on a camel pack
>billy
>stainless steel water bottle
>4 days worth of durable and light food
>Another pair of socks
>A hat
>Sunglasses
>60 rounds of ammo on stripper clips
>First aid kit
>Money or barterable items
>Fire kit
>Bushcrafting knife that's easy to butcher game with
>Binoculars if you don't have optics on your rifle

>>33577910
>I know they never check it because she has told me so herself so I hide a jar of honey in here.


Is your first name pooh?

You need brain help . Seriously you are fucking creepy insane.

>>33578101
>blanket
>map of the area and compass

>>33577421
>Sound of defeorestation
Nigga chainsaws sound very different to a fucking hand drill. That's going to be an extra 10lbs in your bag you don't need. A hand crank drill is way more practical for a bugout bag. The whole point of one is to be self officiant in an emergency such as no power.

>>33578101
>Some fishing line and hooks
>Don't know what they are called in other countries but a possum trap (like a mini bear trap)

>>33577910
But why the gas meters? Even if they do never check it you're relying on it never malfunctioning between now and the happening. If a technician checks it he's going to toss the honey. Why not bury some stash boxes and mark down the Lat and Long?

God this thread is great

>>33575350
>>33577421
>>33577910
OP, having read this and knowing the type of people who hang out on /k/, I have to ask you something.

Which episode of "Preppers" is the one about you? Because this is "Preppers" levels of stupid shit.

>>33577910

>ffs do I have to explain everything?

YES! No one does that. No logical person would think of doing that.

What if these people need work done on their gas lines? The workman is definitely gonna open up that box. He's gonna find all that shit, they're gonna throw the food away and take your tools. There's too many variables and possible outcomes where you lose your stores.

Lets say that doesn't happen though, and all your stuff is still there in the happening:

If shit does indeed htf, and these people haven't evacuated, they're gonna be at maximum paranoia levels, full house lockdown, looking out their windows constantly. If they are armed, like 300 million Americans are, how are they gonna react when they see some dude fucking around their property, and there is no rule of law?

>>33575388

shocking discovery

>>33575855
because he's tarded?

>>33576010
>OP gets shot for tresspassing because he was retrieving a ham sandwich from his neighbors gas gas meter.

I felt retarded just typing that out.

>>33578246
It's fucking hilarious that show, not a single person has a garden or any tools.

>>33575350

Don't buy every thing at once? Buy all the tools together. If ppl ask you shit about it, say you just moved into a house after yrs of living in a apartment, you don't got ant tools to do X,Y and A. Buy the other shit shit like camping supplies together.

Or do what I do, just dont give a shit and buy the stuff all together.

>>33578341

Oh, if the guy makes fun of you, get the manager and bitch about it. Tell him how shitty of a employee he has, let the faggot learn the hard way. Could also get a nice discount too because of that.

>>33576178
this is logically inconsistent, if SHTF u cant buy anything anyway, the whole point is to have this stuff before. also, if there was some sort of happening, and you could still go to the store, then you would just be honest and say, "yeah, im buying supplies because of the alien invasion" and everyone would understand because THERE WAS AN ALIEN INVASION

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>>33576182
given OPs responses I think he may seriously have some sort of cognitive issues. I am not trying to be mean. There seems to be real problems grasping logic of a SHTF situation and severe public interaction issues, this is particularly demonstrated by the fact he cant fathom how someone could buy supplies at a store and suffer through a cashiers zombie joke. What kind of crippling social disorders do you have OP?

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>>33578489
I am not even going to get into this weird food squirreling thing hes doing with utility meters, I mean that's just way too obvious crazy behavior. Part of me thinks he is trolling but this place is a magnet for robots

>>33578489
I don't have cognitvie issues.

Peoples gas boxes are OUTSIDE their homes.
In a SHTF situation most people will lock themselves indoors or evacuate. Therefore, they will not see me sneaking to get my food. Also, nobody who is foraging will check a gas meter box for food. It is a secret place
Also, lets not forget, that the gas going through the meter box will still hang around, so I can easily start a fire to cook spam etc.

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>>33578596
but they may catch you going to put food in before

>>33575350
i just look at them with a blank face and stare till they realize
all i want is them to do their job,and do it quietly. usually they shut the fuck up and let me pay for the stuff. or if im feeling funny,i look at them with a dead serious face and say yes i am preparing for the collapse,zombies,russkies,etc, pretty hard not to laugh at their faces after though.

>>33578596
oh god full retard

>>33577421
Now this is autism

>>33577421
>scaring wildlife as the drill sounds like deforestation
>hammer - potential suicide option
top krk

>>33578900
fuk off

>>33578596
Gas companies regularly check those gas boxes you fucking retarded, the homeowner won't but the companies do, that's the reason they are on the outside to the worker can check it without disturbing the owner. Jesus how are you not getting this.

>>33579438
gas companies will assume the owner put the food there and won't move it

>>33579711
Isn't it against OSHA or something to block those meters as well?

>>33580134
Yes it is, the guy will go to the owner and be like "hey you can't hide food back there" the owner will be utterly confused, install cameras and get op arrest for trespass

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Who cares.

Just say "I'm going camping" or "lol yea world war Z is coming man"

Or order online

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>>33576001
>MANUAL drilling
ain't nobody got time for that

>>33577622
He can use his hammer for that.

Honestly OP, he probably was making a joke like "Oh, you probably have a reason for buying this that isn't insane but it's funny how it looks buying this together".

I know how you feel OP. I bought an axe, some coveralls, a load of plastic sheeting, some chains, some locks, and some caustic soda all together. You should have seen the look I got.

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>>33580805

I bought everything I need at separate stores

>>33578352
And people say Americans don't barter.

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>>33581237
when will this be on best of the worst?

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>people still doing the bug out bag meme

How long does it take for these retarded autistic preppers to realize that BoB's are a fucking prepper honeypot?

This is my first time on /k/, is it always like this?

>>33581550

No, it gets much worse.

>>33577421
How would you kill yourself with a hammer?

>>33575350
https://youtu.be/rWHniL8MyMM

>>33581550
Sometimes people put things in their butts.

>>33581508
Woa, there is no need for this heresy, i thought we were civilized people.

>>33581600
Same way you'd kill someone else with a hammer.

>>33581719
>Sometimes

>>33581989
And post about it, happy?

>>33575350
buy 'em seperately
or say you're going camping

>>33581934
It seems like it would be very difficult to beat yourself to death.

>>33577421
>scaring wildlife as the drill sounds like deforestation
holy fuck top fucking kek

>>33575350
It doesn't matter, you are in Walmart.

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>>33575350
>why do people treat me like I'm a fucking sperg when I act like a fucking sperg?

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bumping because this is too fucking great.

>>33575350
>storing food in gas meters
Aaaaaand now it's creepy.

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>>33577421

>>33575388
big surprise