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Alright /k/ the night has come, some dudes just broke into your house but they have no idea that you have been wishing this for years. Here's how it goes.
>BOOM, BOOM, CRASH
>you dawn whatever operator gear or sexy lingerie you have
>you have had the drop on them for years so you take your sweet ass time
>you have a full-house surround sound system ready to go
>you close all of your hidden blast doors so there is no way out
>burglars are trapped
>you start the smoke machine
>you start the strobe lights
>you turn on your music at full volume
>you get sadistic
>you go and have a fun fight
What song is playing while you have this clearly one sided battle?
Here's mine: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N__yGuSz7PM
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>>33121787
*tips over 55gal drums of home defense bleach and ammonia*
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>>33121787
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rN6avab0fIY
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Ode to joy
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>>33121787
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDjc5tRfr7w
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKVL12XpLcg
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH BOOOOOOOOOOOOIIIIIII
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>>33121800
Is it viable to lock the doors and turn your house into a gas chamber for home defence?
As long as you have a gas mask.
https://youtu.be/67rc96joOz8
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>>33122360
>>33122511
10/10 both of these
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>>33121787
>White men breaking into my house
Probably a prank.
Why aren't there any images on Google of black guys breaking into houses?
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6f30PxyNfSA
As the pink and yellow strobe lights come on.
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Might not even need to grab the funs. This video can cause seizures to some (warning to epile/k/tics). If he doesn't grand mal, at least it's a fun song.
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>>33122511
Seconding this option and suggesting this song as an alternative.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgiyr-fmwiw
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>>33122922
Shit. Link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cuoIvNFUY7I
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Either this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHN9fBRGhs0
or
this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wtXz3OlFwZA
Both would be funny. I wouldn't want to kill them, though. It would make for a hilarious story for them to tell in Jail.
>Boom, crash, etc.
>Enter house
>Suddenly, the steel doors activate
>Robber realizes there's no escape
>Cue speed metal, high frequency strobe, smoke machine, glade plugin.
>Trapped
>10,000 deafening watts of speed metal transmitted directly into the would-be robber's skull, he realizes his fate is sealed
>Confused yet still relatively lucid, the hapless mongoloid now sees -- the hulking shadow that suddenly appeared in the corner of the room is indeed a man in a batman suit stroking a 2 foot strapon.
>Robber empties his standard issue hi point
>to know avail
>The autism is too strong
>Bullets can't kill what is already dead inside
>Out of ammo and feeling cornered the robber reaches for the nearest blunt object
>My half eaten can of spam from the last time I ventured out of my room
>Its so old and pungent the he uncontrollably evacuates every known orifice on the human body
>Now is my chance to strike
>Autistic screeching
>Cold cock robber in the cock with tacticooled nugget
>His face grazes the 2 foot strapon as the final blow from my gargantuan ham fisted punch connects with his jaw
>The last thing he remembers is the strobe, speed metal, and realizing the smell he briefly encountered while grazing the strap on was clearly the smell anus -- that dong had been used.
>Satisfied with my work, I let Midget-Karl, my ambiguously foreign room mate have his way with the unconscious poor soul.
>psshh nothing personel kid
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>>33121787
>dawn
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